Chapter 49 She Has a Boyfriend

Moonlight spills down, casting dappled shadows on the trees.

The streetlights shone at a distance that was neither too close nor too far, casting long shadows.

Yao Fanghua only stopped when she saw his back as he approached her doorstep.

Yao Fanghua frowned, reflecting. Why had she stopped here? Why not under a streetlamp? Or even in the moonlight? Was it possible that she subconsciously felt her relationship with Yu Bei was something shameful, something that could only exist in the shadows? It was just the past; there was nothing shameful about it. It was definitely because she had drunk too much.

Yu Bei had already caught up and was staring intently at Yao Fanghua.

"haven't seen you for a long time."

Yes, it's been a long time.

"Are you doing well?"

That's good. She pulled through.

Looking at the person he missed so dearly, Yu Bei could no longer hold back.

"I didn't know you would come back. I thought I would never see you again. I'm so sorry, so sorry..."

Yao Fanghua pushed Yu Bei away, her face frosty, her voice so cold it could shatter ice, "You mean if I were still in the countryside, if I hadn't gotten into university, if I hadn't been able to come back, you wouldn't have to apologize?"

She went to the countryside, and Yu Bei joined the army, and the two lost contact.

One was walking downhill, the other uphill. In that situation, even if Yu Bei didn't take the initiative, just a slightly indifferent reaction from him would have been enough to push Yao Fanghua far away, enough to make her so heartbroken that she would cut ties with him. Yao Fanghua didn't deny that she had always been both arrogant and fragile. Afraid of giving and afraid of getting hurt.

"Why didn't you write to me? If you had contacted me then, if you had said you wanted to continue our relationship and not break up, I would have agreed, I definitely would. I would have persisted, I would have waited until I reached marriageable age, I would have submitted a marriage application to marry you..." He was only seventeen at the time, conflicted, hesitant, and struggling to make a difficult choice. He didn't know which path was the right one. But he believed that as long as Yao Fanghua contacted him, as long as Yao Fanghua took the initiative to move forward, he would never choose to break up with her, he would never accept the end of the relationship without even saying goodbye.

"You're married. You're already married."

"But I don't like her, I'm in so much emotional pain." Yu Bei choked up, the longer the time passed, the more painful his longing became. Time didn't lessen his yearning; instead, it intensified. He belatedly realized how important feelings were in a marriage, how agonizing it was to face someone he disliked or even loathed every day. But it was too late. He was a soldier; he couldn't, and would never, get a divorce.

His mother told him that a marriage without financial security is destined to be unhappy, and sooner or later they will resent each other and grow tired of each other.

But his mother didn't tell him that bread without love is tasteless, even hard to swallow. Those who say love isn't important must not have met someone they truly love; otherwise, how could they endure it? Teach him, or he won't be able to hold on.

In the family dormitory, couples would fight from time to time. The instructor had repeatedly advised them in public, saying that all this talk about love and affection was nonsense and that living a peaceful life was better than anything else.

The company commander started cursing, saying things like "they don't get along," which was utter nonsense. He said if they didn't get along, they should work things out.

Love? That's bullshit. I've never even seen that stuff in my life. Feeling attracted? You son of a bitch! I can beat you into feeling attracted, make your heart race uncontrollably.

Yu Bei sometimes wondered if he was the only one so sentimental and unmanly.

Later I realized that there are no such perfect matches in the world, and even if there are perfect matches, there's still the chance to meet. Everyone is just living together for various reasons; if two people truly love each other and are perfectly in sync, that's a blessing from heaven. To encounter love is a stroke of luck.

He was just lucky to have encountered it.

Only after getting married did he realize how much he loved Yao Fanghua. Yao Fanghua wasn't just the stirrings of his youth, but also the source of his deepest joy. He thought he would fall for someone else, but he didn't. He only missed Yao Fanghua more and more; every day without her felt like a wasted day. He regretted it.

Later, when Yu Qingqing wrote to him that Yao Fanghua had been admitted to university and returned, he regretted his decision even more. If he had chosen Yao Fanghua back then, they would now be an enviable couple, living a life of comfort and mutual support in their careers.

Upon learning that he was to be reinstated, he didn't react excessively but calmly accepted it. Perhaps it was because he considered the possibility of divorce that he wasn't so resistant, and even felt a little secretly pleased. Perhaps, perhaps everything was still possible.

"Hua Hua, I haven't forgotten you for a single day all these years. I often dream about you. I always wonder what it would be like to meet you again. I'll get a divorce, let's start over, okay?" Yu Bei moved closer to Yao Fanghua, wanting to be even closer to her. In his dreams, countless times, he had held her in his arms and pressed her down beneath him. He wanted to kiss her, to hold her. Now, after drinking, he wanted it even more.

"I have a boyfriend now," Yao Fanghua said before leaving. Whether they divorced or not was none of her business. She couldn't start over with him. She had let go because her heart had changed.

"Who? Who is it?" Yu Bei roared. He didn't believe it and stared at Yao Fanghua's back. She must be lying to him.

"Wu Peng".