40 Chapter Forty

Xie Lang rarely returned to his room anymore; whenever asked, he would say he was staying in the study in the outer courtyard.

Chapter Forty

In the study, the light from the oil lamp and red candle spilled into the wisps of darkness, illuminating the room.

Xie Lang sat listlessly at the long table, his long, jade-like fingers gripping official documents, but his gaze wasn't on them. He stared at the orchids that had spread to the ground by the window, lost in thought.

He realized he must have lost his mind, actually being curious about what it felt like to be scratched by his wife.

He recalled his colleague's bitter smile, tinged with smugness...

A few breaths later, a soft sneer rang out in the study, a sound that seemed to suggest someone was being smug.

He seems to be spending too much energy on his wife lately.

He never lusts after women, nor should he.

Thinking of something, Xie Lang's brows, which were as stern as snow on a high mountain, furrowed slightly and he hissed softly, as if he were caught up in some heavy mystery and couldn't understand it. He raised his hand and pressed it.

Lately, I feel uneasy around her. It's like I've turned into an animal, always wanting to devour her piece by piece. I should keep my distance from her for now. Anyway, she won't come looking for him unless it's that matter.

She was hiding something from him, which displeased him, and this should teach her a lesson. After thinking it over, he must be upset because of this.

Xie Wu, who was quietly waiting in the corner, took in the adult's unusual behavior. He glanced at him once and then dared not look any longer, lowering his eyes and focusing on his inner thoughts.

People say that the Marquis of Zhongwu's family has been loyal and virtuous for three generations, and that the noble gentlemen are like green bamboo, with great love for the world.

Xie Wu had followed the master since childhood, yet he was unaware of this. Beneath the upright and gentlemanly exteriors of the male masters of the Marquis's mansion… each one was extraordinary, possessing an extremely strong possessiveness. Take the master, for example. Now, he seemed very indulgent and kind to his wife, yet he stubbornly insisted that his feelings for her were merely those of a husband and wife. They were practically inseparable, yet it was still just a matter of marital affection? Xie Wu had a vague feeling that if one day the two were to fall apart, the one who couldn't bear it wouldn't be his wife…

I have no idea what the adults are so obsessed with.

Xie Wu then thought of the adult's secret storeroom, where all the adult's belongings from childhood to adulthood were locked away. Even broken items, if the adult liked them, or anything else, would be put into that storeroom.

When he first went in, he was so shocked by the sight of all the broken and damaged utensils that had been glued back together that he almost lost his mind!

He couldn't tell whether being confined to his own territory by adults was a good thing or a bad thing.

Even his favorite objects are treated this way. How can you, sir, be so carefree as to let go of your beloved wife, whom you have already taken a liking to?

Xie Wu, however, felt that the Master was like a giant python in the deep mountains; if one were to be targeted by the Master, one would only end up being strangled. Since the Madam currently favors the Master, everything is negotiable.

But if...

Xie Wu shook his head hurriedly!

Pshaw, pshaw, pshaw! You jinx!

Why are you shaking your head?

The adult's voice was cold, which startled Xie Wu so much that he immediately stood up straight and hurriedly said, "I didn't shake my head."

Xie Lang sneered, "Do you think I'm blind?"

He pointed his long finger outwards and said, "Go run twenty laps around the training ground."

Xie Wu: !

"Not going?"

"……go."

After driving away Xie Wu, who was secretly causing trouble, Xie Lang felt that his mind should be at peace. But even though Xie Wu was gone, his mind was still very troubled.

He glanced at the deep moonlight outside and couldn't help but think of her watery eyes. He got up to go back to the main room, but stopped when he reached the door.

Why is it always him who goes?

She's been very busy lately, seeing a lot of things and meeting new people.

If he doesn't go, she won't look for him, right?

With a sudden thought, Xie Lang, for reasons unknown, withdrew his foot. A moment later, he called a servant, "Go and inform the madam that I have important business to attend to today and cannot return to the main room."

He wanted to see what she would do if he said he wouldn't come back.

I'm really looking forward to it.

"I understand."

Just as the servant was about to leave, Xie Lang called him back, saying, "Come back and report."

The servant, receiving the order, ran quickly towards the main room under the moonlight.

The moonlight was perfect, so Xie Lang wasn't in a hurry to return to his study. Instead, he strolled around the courtyard, basking in the moonlight. His fingers moved lightly, and his eyes were lowered, lost in thought.

This clever servant was especially attentive since it was his first time serving his master. As he ran out of the courtyard, he looked back and saw that his master hadn't gone into the study, so he figured his master was anxiously waiting. Once outside the courtyard, he ran all the way to the main room, told the nanny his purpose, and then met with the madam.

The lady was taken aback, then said she already knew and sent him back.

As the servant ran back to the study, his heart pounded with each step. He felt something was amiss.

When I returned, I indeed saw the adult standing in the courtyard with his hands behind his back.

The study door was wide open, and firelight poured down like a waterfall. The master stood like a god in the very center of the light, listening to the servant's report.

The servant couldn't see the master's expression, but for some reason, the hairs on the back of his head stood on end.

"Go down."

The master sternly told him to step back, and the servant breathed a sigh of relief. He quickly stepped aside before daring to peek back. Why did he feel that the master's voice had suddenly become hoarse? Had he caught a cold?

A moment later, a sinister laugh echoed from the courtyard.

For two consecutive days, Xie Lang did not return to the main room.

Liu Qingqing's already disappointed heart sank even further. He was perfectly fine, so what happened to him?

This captivated Liu Qingqing, making her lose all interest in doing anything else.

He can't eat or sleep well, and I don't know what he's been busy with these past two days.

He had times before when he wouldn't come back to his room, so why did she feel so sad this time, as if she had a bitter, unripe fruit?

She loved him so much that every thought in her heart seemed to be connected to him. He could bring her joy, and he could bring her sorrow. Every time he approached her, her heart would leap with delight. But distance, on the other hand, turned her tender heart into a heavy stone.

Has he distanced himself from her?

But why? He was perfectly fine before, and he missed her so much.

If he hadn't been so indifferent to Liu Qingying, she would have wondered if he had broken off the engagement.

After all, if he wanted, he could wait another two years and get a different woman from the Liu family.

Before we knew it, it was the fifteenth day.

Before dinner, he hadn't arrived, and Liu Qingqing had no appetite. After taking only a couple of bites, she had little interest in eating and asked the food to be taken away.

Granny Li and the others saw this and were very anxious.

Zhao Pansheng glanced at Granny Li, and after Granny Li nodded, he disappeared quietly into the evening glow, like a koi fish entering the water.

Zhao Pansheng went to the study, but his figure was caught by the sharp-eyed Xie Wu as soon as he passed by. Xie Wu glanced back at the tightly closed study door, hesitated for a moment, and then quickly went to the door first.

Zhao Pansheng was hesitating when he heard the noise and turned around to see Xie Wu. His eyes lit up instantly.

"Thank you, Brother Xie!"

That heartfelt cry made Xie Wu's heart tremble, and his dark face immediately turned red. Unfortunately, he was too dark to see it.

"Miss Zhao, what brings you here? Is it because Madam sometimes seeks out Your Excellency?" he asked hastily.

Zhao Pansheng shook his head, stepped forward, and asked in a low voice, "Have you been very busy these past two days, sir?"

Fearing Xie Wu might overthink things, Zhao Pansheng quickly tried to smooth things over, saying, "Since the master hasn't returned, the lady has lost her appetite and can't sleep well these past two days."

Her fragrance wafted over, making Xie Wu dizzy and lightheaded. Even though he was standing on hard ground, he felt lightheaded, as if his mind had frozen. Only when he heard Miss Zhao softly call out "Brother Xie" several times did he realize that he had been lost in thought.

After wiping his face, he whispered, "Sir is busy."

He lowered his eyes, not daring to look at Miss Zhao, for fear that she would notice something amiss. "What are you so busy with, sir?" he asked. "After leaving the yamen and declining all other engagements, you immerse yourself in your study reading leisurely." Those books were treasured greatly; he wouldn't even let him touch them.

His heart was pounding like a drum. Could it be that Miss Zhao was drugged? He was about to faint!

He quickly took two steps back and raised his hand to support himself against the wall.

Zhao Pansheng stepped forward again, "Brother Xie, are you feeling unwell?"

Xie Wu shook his head vigorously, "It's nothing, it's nothing! I'm perfectly healthy, I'm probably just a little hot, it's nothing. Miss Zhao, don't worry about it."

A melodious laugh rang out, like a nightingale in the woods, "Why should I think about it?"

Xie Wu was stunned and stood there dumbfounded.

Zhao Pansheng glanced at the beads of sweat on Xie Wu's forehead and handed him a clean white handkerchief. "Brother Xie, wipe your sweat."

After Xie Wu stiffly accepted the gift, she added, "If you have the time, sir, please go back and visit our lady."

After Zhao Pansheng left and the fragrant breeze disappeared, Xie Wu came to his senses and raised his hand to cover his chest. But he realized something was wrong. Looking down, he saw the white handkerchief clutched in his palm. Feeling its heat, he quickly stuffed it into his clothes.

I returned to the study in a daze and stood guard there, suddenly feeling as if I didn't know what year it was.

But then he heard an adult calling him.

"Where did you just go?"

After thinking it over, Xie Wu decided to tell the truth: "Miss Zhao came looking for me."

After a moment of silence, the adult asked again, "Looking for me?"

Xie Wu thought for a moment, and it seemed so, so he nodded emphatically.

Then the adult chuckled softly, then seemed to sigh, "In that case, let's go and take a look."

When Xie Lang returned to his room, Liu Qingqing was still gazing at the moon, lost in thought.

I was so sleepy I could barely keep my eyes open, but I didn't want to go to sleep. I wondered if I could wait for that person to come walking on the river of moonlight.

She really did wait.

She closed her eyes without realizing it, but then heard someone call her "Madam".

Liu Qingqing jolted awake and quickly opened her eyes, only to see Xie Lang standing in front of her as if he had stepped out of a dream, smiling and saying that it had been a long time since they last met.

Tonight, Xie Lang changed his methods, as if he were punishing her.

Like swimming, every time she was about to surface, he would pull her back into the water.

They kept going back and forth, refusing to give her a quick resolution.

Liu Qingqing was covered in sweat, her red lips slightly parted like a fish washed ashore by the waves, thirsting for air.

But Xie Lang bowed down and stole his life.

I was exhausted after a long night, but woke up early.

As soon as she moved, the person who was wrapped around her from behind woke up as well.

"I woke up my husband," Liu Qingqing quickly apologized.

Xie Lang gave a soft hum, still slightly sleepy, which was quite alluring.

"Madam, have you been busy lately? Are you simply too busy to see me?"

Liu Qingqing was shocked. "How could I not want to see my husband?"

The sour fruit in my heart was crushed, and the sourness spread.

How could she not want to see him? She just felt wronged, because he was clearly being cold to her, and then he turned around and blamed her.

Liu Qingqing heard him say again, "I've heard that Madam has been troubled lately. If so, you may tell me."

For the time being, she only had two things on her mind: Aunt Jia and him.

I can't bring myself to say any of them.

When Xie Lang left in the early morning, he gave her a deep look, which somehow made her flustered and at a loss.

And this premonition actually came true.

They seemed to have had a disagreement.

Xie Lang rarely returned to his room anymore; whenever asked, he would say he was staying in the study in the outer courtyard.

Each time she was met with a cold shoulder and left disappointed, gradually even the warmest heart grew cold, and Liu Qingqing stopped asking questions.

Although he didn't return to his room, Xie Wu would come twice a day, either to deliver something, to pick up something, or to inquire about his wife's health.

But on those two days of the month, he would arrive as promised and turn her over and over like a pancake.

More than a month has passed, the long summer has ended, and the wind has taken on the scent of autumn.

They, like the summer days of the past, grew cold. Liu Qingqing was at a loss, unsure of what to do.

Fat Pigeon did send a note, with his handwriting so strong it seemed to penetrate the paper. He said he was busy lately and not at home.

But he left the capital?

He didn't say, and she didn't know either.

Ever since he survived that injury, Xie Lang would tell her about it every time he left the capital.

Liu Qingqing cried secretly, feeling a sharp pain in her heart.

Even if she were stupid, she would have figured it out; he deliberately didn't tell her.

I originally thought that their mutual respect and harmonious relationship was already very good.

But his deliberate coldness made her very sad.

She was so sad, so very sad. She couldn't sleep at night and would cry secretly. Even when she finally fell asleep, she would wake up crying again.

He was like the heavens above, able to control everything at will, while she had no power to retaliate.

He can't bring another girl with him when he goes back to Beijing, can he?

The girl held a chubby baby in her arms, and then she was dismissed from her position as the legal wife.

That's how it's written in storybooks!

All sorts of speculations made her anxious and uneasy, almost driving her crazy!

She didn't know what was wrong with Xie Lang all of a sudden.

She knew he was deliberately giving her the cold shoulder because she had experienced this kind of coldness far too often in the Liu family in the past.

I never expected to end up living this kind of life in the Marquis's mansion. It's quite a slap in the face.

She suddenly realized.

Even now that she has money, she doesn't want to lose her status as Xie Lang's legal wife.

She wanted to be his wife.

He was so good to her, and the thought that he would be just as good to others made her heart ache as if it were about to break.

Without him holding the string of the kite, life would seem incredibly boring.

With all these thoughts intertwined, Liu Qingqing fell ill.

It was just a gust of wind, and then it got hot.

It started as a low-grade fever, and Liu Qingqing didn't let Li Mama make a fuss about it. She recovered after taking the medicine.

But a few days later, it caught fire again.

This time, Liu Qingqing didn't even tell Granny Li, keeping it a secret. She ate and slept very little.

After another sleepless night, he fainted.

By the time the news reached Xie Lang, Liu Qingqing had been ill for nearly half a month.

Xie Lang did not come to visit, but only sent a message telling her to take good care of herself.

After a serious illness, my spirits have been dampened considerably.

Were all those past romances just illusions?

While Xie Lang's mind was full of other things, something else did enter.

But life goes on, and she has to stand up for herself, not only for herself but also for the people around her.

If you want to get this last thing done properly, then go back to the last one.

As long as she stands firm, even if Xie Lang divorces her, she can still live a good life.

Now, I can only barely choose Zhao Pansheng, and I will ask her to go out and do some things for me in the future.

After sorting things out, I felt much more at ease.

She just didn't know how to face Xie Lang.

She always felt that Xie Lang's eyes could see through everything. Was she trying to force Xie Lang to love her?

She's a person who cares about her reputation, even after being treated so coldly.

From that day on, Liu Qingqing turned the east wing into her study and devoted herself entirely to it.

They were either deciphering the secrets of the parchment scrolls or examining the account books.

Zhao Pansheng would occasionally go out on a errand.

Feeling dizzy and lightheaded, I couldn't care less about the first and fifteenth of the lunar month.

She didn't care whether Xie Lang returned to his room at night or not; most of the time, when she returned to her room, Xie Lang was already asleep.

Why did he suddenly come back?

Liu Qingqing kept her thoughts to herself and didn't ask.

The awkwardness that had lasted for over a month was thus gently put aside.

Liu Qingqing became more open-minded; in the future, this vast Marquis's mansion would all belong to him, not to mention the small Jialan Garden.

She has already washed up in the east wing, and she will do the same when she returns tonight.

Xie Lang was already asleep, but a lamp was left on for her outside. Liu Qingqing went over, picked up the candle wick, and covered the wick, extinguishing the candle.

She returned to her inner room by the moonlight. These days she had been avoiding Xie Lang, being careful not to wake him.

After a serious illness, I, who used to always want to be with him, became much more sober.

It seems that Xie Lang found her clingy annoying.

She tiptoed, lifting her skirt, and carefully stepped over his legs at the foot of the bed. She quietly sat down, and as she pulled back the covers to slip inside, her wrist was grabbed, and she was pulled forward, causing Liu Qingqing to fall directly into Xie Lang's arms.

Looking down into his clear yet deep eyes, there was not a trace of sleepiness.

Xie Lang has indeed been busy with official duties lately, but not so busy that he can't go home. There are still some things he hasn't figured out.

"Madam has been very busy lately."

In the stillness of the night, his voice grew increasingly mysterious, "What are you all busy with?"

Liu Qingqing remained stiff, unwilling to tell him her anger: "They're just trivial matters."

"Is that so?"

He chuckled softly.

His laughter was like an invisible thorn, slowly piercing her skin until it struck her tender heart, causing a spasm of pain within her.

In the past two months, he has not come except for two days when we slept together.

What did he take her for?

Is it a sexual release device?

The next day, when she woke up, he had already left!

The side where she slept was chilly, just like her heart.

She loved him so much, and he knew she loved him so much, so why did he treat her like this?

Liu Qingqing felt wronged, and her snow-white cheeks puffed up with anger.

How much did she love him? Just like now, seeing that although the corners of his lips were still curved in a smile, his eyes were as cold as ice, she knew he was unhappy!

But why is he unhappy? He's even angry!

Did she abandon her for two months?

And you even ask her what she's busy with! Busy with what? Busy figuring out how to save herself even if you dump her!

She was also angry. If she had been more tolerant, she wouldn't have suffered a loss at the Liu residence!

An impulse welled up inside her. Although it was her first time living with someone, she knew that nothing lasts forever. If there were any disagreements, she should resolve them as soon as possible, otherwise, it would leave a lingering resentment. As she hesitated, Xie Lang spoke first, seemingly unfazed.

"You've always been sensible, why are you throwing a tantrum now?"

Xie Lang lay on his back, looking rather carefree and unrestrained compared to his usual upright posture. Yet, his sharp, eagle-like eyes remained fixed on her face.

Interrupting Liu Qingqing's thoughts, she stared straight at him, "Did you marry me because I'm sensible, my husband?"

She should know why they got married, so why is she asking him?

Xie Lang noticed the sadness welling up in her eyes. He pondered it carefully, but his heart itched to see more in her eyes. "It's not just that."

That's not all, that's it...

Liu Qingqing, who had been kneeling dignifiedly, was shocked by these words and collapsed onto the bed.

"Doesn't my husband love me?" she murmured softly.

Why was he so gentle and considerate towards her in the past?

The seemingly solid wall was easily shattered by him.

"Why should I love you?" Xie Lang asked, puzzled.

Liu Qingqing then realized that she had actually asked the question aloud, and she was flustered.

Xie Lang didn't give her a chance to catch her breath, pressing on with, "Does not loving you mean I can't treat you well?"

His deep, magnetic voice trailed off with an alluring tone as he reached out and hooked his hand around her icy fingers. "Is Madam dissatisfied with the current situation? Or would you like me to do something?"

But Liu Qingqing couldn't hear him anymore; she was like a frozen wooden doll.

My heart ached, still reeling from his words, which were colder than winter rain.

If she wasn't obedient and sensible, would he abandon her? What followed was cold treatment. Perhaps finding her troublesome, he didn't return home for days. It was as if the husband who had once cared for her was a phantom in a dream.

"Don't think about these things anymore, go to sleep."

With a sweep of his long arm, she floated down as lightly as a paper doll.

She pressed herself against his warm chest, her eyes fixed as if frozen, yet she felt so cold.

Liu Qingqing couldn't sleep.

Xie Lang was also unable to sleep.

He casually fiddled with his wife's long, silky hair, his eyes like deep pools.

He didn't know what he wanted, but...

When Liu Qingqing woke up the next day, Xie Lang was indeed not there.

There were still traces of him lying on his side, and her left shoulder was tight and sore, indicating that she had slept in his arms all night.

Liu Qingqing couldn't understand him and was completely bewildered. Was he good to her or not?

His heart is deeper than the sea...

I forced myself to get out of bed, and like a wooden doll, I let others dress me up. I went to pay my respects to the old lady, and then, suppressing my chaotic thoughts, I learned about the affairs of the household and returned to Jialan Garden.

Normally, returning to Jialan Garden would fill me with warmth, but this time I felt empty.

Even though it's late summer, the sun is like a silver wire of charcoal hanging in the air, suffocatingly hot.

Feeling troubled, I decided to retreat into the kitchen and bury myself in making cakes, which gave me a sense of escapism.

When she was feeling down at the Liu residence, her mother, who was quite skilled in this craft, had taught her some easy-to-make dishes. Their original small kitchen had long since fallen into disrepair and could only produce a few simple, common sugar cakes.

Soft and sweet, it feels like a cloud in your mouth. It's as if you can just squint your eyes and eat a piece of sugar cake and all your worries will disappear.

I haven't cooked in a long time and I've gotten rusty. I made one batch after another, and only a few turned out to look good.

She thought for a moment, then put the few plump white sugar cakes into an exquisite huanghuali wood carved food box. This food box was a rare little item that her mother had left her. She thought long and hard before taking it out to use it, feeling that it was the only way to express her feelings.

She beckoned Zhao Pansheng and instructed him, "Go and deliver this to the master. The food box is important, so be careful."

Zhao Pansheng accepted the order and left quickly.

She didn't know what the way of husband and wife was, but she knew that always being cold to each other wouldn't work.

Because it was him, she was willing to be the one to back down first.

After making the sugar cakes, she felt discouraged. Exhausted, Liu Qingqing went back to her room to rest.

She rested for a while and fell asleep. When she woke up, the sun was shining brightly in the afterglow of the setting sun.

Exhausted from lying down all day, she wanted to take a walk, but somehow ended up in the outer courtyard corridor. Turning the corner, she found herself at the courtyard gate. Liu Qingqing gripped her handkerchief tightly, momentarily lost in thought.

Just then, a slender figure swayed over from the other side; it was none other than Liu Qingying.

When did she return from the academy?

Just as she was about to speak, her gaze fell upon the huanghuali wood carved food box that Liu Qingying was carrying. The food box, which should have been on Xie Lang's study desk, was actually being held by Liu Qingying. Liu Qingqing's pupils instantly contracted. "Where did this come from!"

[Author's Note]

Next chapter preview: "Qingqing is gentle and refined, but inferior to Qingying."