[Music Recommendation: Love in the dark ~ Adele]

Freya turned slowly, wishing time would stop so she wouldn’t have to face the truth. She felt the hair on the back of her neck rise, goosebumps covering her body. Her heartbeat wasn’t left out; it was loudly thudding in her chest.

"What did you just say?" she asked the young prince, not because she hadn’t heard him the first time, but because she wanted him to correct himself. Maybe he had mistaken Rowan for someone else, or perhaps the prince was joking. She just needed to hear it again, hoping for a different answer.

The young prince cleared his throat, knowing that his words were about to crush the soul of the girl in front of him.

"I told you already, Rowan doesn’t love you. That’s the kind of man he is. He just looks for the easiest woman to bed—"

"I didn’t ask you that," Freya’s voice turned cold, her eyes glaring at the prince. "Repeat the words you said earlier."

Gerald rubbed his neck awkwardly. "I heard from my brother... Lirien and Rowan are getting married at the temple where my parents are. They wanted it to be a small wedding since we just finished my brother’s coronation." He paused, waiting for Freya to respond, but there was only silence.

"The marriage couldn’t be delayed any longer. My father said it had to happen if he was going to trust Avon’s alliance. Rowan seemed like the most eligible man since Avon doesn’t allow their king to take another wife if the queen is still alive."

Freya waved her hand, trying to slow the flood of words, each one stabbing her heart.

"Wait! But what about Lirien? She—?"

"Yes, she likes women, that’s true. But how long did you think she was going to keep that act up? My mother would bury her alive if she ever found out. She had no say in it. I just came to let you know so you don’t put your hopes on him. They left for the temple earlier, and by now, the marriage chest has been exchanged. Maybe they’re in the process of consum—"

Freya’s world finally crumbled. She could feel it falling apart, but in reality, she was the one on the ground.

"Freya!" The prince rushed to her side, holding her shoulders. "Are you okay?"

Even his voice sounded muffled. Freya felt like she was underwater and couldn’t breathe. Her chest ached so badly that she pressed her hand to it, trying to find air, but it was all in vain. She wanted to cry but didn’t know how. She wanted to scream but couldn’t find her voice. Freya felt trapped in a box with no air or light, just darkness.

"I’m sorry... I should have warned you earlier," the prince continued, trying to console her in any way he could.

Freya still couldn’t hear him; all she could hear was her own heartbeat, her own collapse, her own darkness. Rowan was getting married? And to the princess? It didn’t make sense to Freya, and she needed it to. She decided to see for herself. It wasn’t true until she confirmed it.

Standing up from the ground, Freya didn’t care about Rowan’s shirt hanging loosely on her, leaving her shoulders bare, nor did she care about her disheveled hair.

"W-where are you going?" the prince called after her.

Freya’s legs moved on their own, as if her body no longer belonged to her. Her disheveled hair flew into her face, but she didn’t bother to push it away. Blindly, she walked toward what she thought was the path to the palace, until she collided with one of the Crown Prince’s wives.

"Are you okay- oh, Rowan’s sister?" The young woman, about Freya’s age, asked in a calm voice. She noticed how distressed and unkempt Freya looked. "Is everything alright? Should I get you something?"

As the woman spoke, a maid rushed in and bowed.

"I was told the silk in the marriage box wasn’t enough. We need to send more before they leave tomorrow," the maid announced.

Freya raised her tired eyes, roughly pushing her hair back, though some strands stuck to her face from the sweat.

"M-marriage?" she asked.

One of the wives nodded. "Oh, you didn’t know? I guess Rowan didn’t tell you. It’s the reason he went to the mountain to—"

"Please, we need to be quick," the maid interrupted urgently. The two women dashed out of the passage, leaving Freya sitting on the cold marble floor, which mirrored the emptiness she felt inside.

Freya pulled her knees to her chest, cradling herself. She tried to think of all the good memories, hoping this was just a nightmare and that if she focused on the good times, she would wake up. She didn’t know how long she had been sitting there, but when she heard the sky rumbling, a clear sign of impending rain she knew her life was finally over.

She never loved Rowan, Freya told herself. She only wanted to be alone, to read her books, to hide from the world. Then Rowan walked into her life, and not only did he control her body, but also her heart. And when she was finally ready to take his hand and love him not just as a woman he slept with, but as his wife he left her hanging, all alone. Who was she supposed to hate?

Rowan? For making her fall for him? Or Lirien, the princess who had been her friend, someone she had confided in, but who had taken her happiness away? The only person Freya could blame at that point was herself. She blamed herself for falling in love with Rowan. Maybe the prince was right; someone like him wasn’t capable of love, someone with no regard for human feelings. Freya had known that, but what had changed? Why hadn’t she continued avoiding him? Why had she let him in? Why?

Standing up from the floor, Freya walked like a crazed woman, someone whose soul had been sucked away. When she reached her father’s door, she knocked. Even her knock was weak, so it took Louis until the third tap to open the door. 𝐟𝚛𝕖𝚎𝕨𝗲𝐛𝚗𝐨𝐯𝐞𝕝.𝐜𝗼𝗺

"Who- Freya?" her father called, taking in her appearance. "Are you okay? If this is about earlier, I’m sorry—"

Freya hugged her father. "Pa, I want to go home," she said softly. She hadn’t even realized she was crying until the tears touched her hand.

"Let’s go home, P-please."