Chapter 48

After Kalluto appeared, the atmosphere within the Phantom Troupe became even more subtle.

But the atmosphere at my home and on Kukuroo Mountain wasn't much better, so I was fairly comfortable staying there.

Moreover, the Phantom Troupe members are actually surprisingly easy to get along with in some ways.

Like is like, dissatisfaction is dissatisfaction, and grudges are clearly distinguished.

They were quite direct in expressing their feelings, making no attempt to hide their wariness of me while leaning over to ask if I wanted to play cards together, and then using the act of playing cards as a pretext to ask me gossip.

"Are you really going to marry that guy... Kurt's older brother?"

After receiving my affirmative answer, the man named Nobunaga, who was carrying a sword, would show a sympathetic expression:

"That's terrible. You've had it tough too."

"I'll go crazy if I stay with that guy... Anyway, I don't get along with him, what do you guys think?" After expressing his opinion, he asked his companions around him.

A purple-haired woman dressed in white, presumably named Machi, glanced expressionlessly at Nobunaga's face.

"Don't look at me, I don't know him."

"Little Shizuku?" Nobunaga laughed. "Isn't it because you are rare female members that I wanted to ask for your opinions?"

Xiao Di's expression was equally indifferent.

"As a woman, am I obligated to have any opinions?" she asked doubtfully. "I have no opinion on these kinds of things."

“You guys are really boring,” Nobunaga said.

“I think you’re the one who’s boring,” Feitan said coldly.

...

That's about it.

Despite their infamous reputation, the members of the Phantom Troupe are surprisingly easygoing with each other.

Even Kurt and Feitan, who had just been at each other's throats and had a brief confrontation over me, remained remarkably calm when speaking to each other.

"Excuse me," Kurt gestured for Feitan to move aside.

Feitan stared at the cards in his hand, not moving, having discerned Kurt's intention:

"I'm busy... I'll get you whatever flavor you want."

"...We're out of grapes. Have Finks bring you another box."

Phinks protested, "Why is it always me! Feitan, you should prove yourself once in a while!"

Do you want me to show you now?

"Playing cards... Oh dear! Whose turn was it just now?"

...

"Do they usually do this?" After Kurt reluctantly grabbed two bottles of drinks and came back, I took the bottles and asked him.

“I guess so,” Kurt said uncertainly.

"Aren't you with them?" I asked again.

“Not interested,” he said.

It's clear that he doesn't quite fit in here.

I rested my chin on my hand, holding the bottle cap, and stared blankly for a moment. Then, as if struck by a sudden thought, Kurt reached out and took the drink from my hand, unscrewed the cap, and handed it back to me.

Not far away, three male members of the Phantom Troupe were engrossed in playing cards, occasionally engaging in a sudden exchange of blows.

The woman named Machi was in a spot just where she could be illuminated by the moonlight, her head bowed, her fingers flying, fiddling and teasing something.

I used the Condensation skill and noticed that she had condensed many fine, shimmering thought threads, and used these thought threads to weave beautiful animal patterns with her bare hands.

Xiao Di is playing on her phone.

Noticing my gaze, she turned her head, glanced at me, and pushed up her red-rimmed glasses.

Kuroro put away his book and started playing on his phone, drinking a beverage as he looked at it. There were already many empty cans lying around him.

At this moment, Nobunaga stood up and said irritably:

"No way! Both of you have terrible cards, I'm not playing with you anymore!"

He angrily stepped out of the card game.

Finks pressed his shoulder joint, twisted his arm, and turned his neck:

"I'm also getting bored playing with you guys... Hey, Feitan, let's fight!"

Feitan vanished in a flash, and when he reappeared, he was standing alone outside the crowd.

“I’m not interested,” he said coldly. “You guys fight it yourselves.”

...They broke up pretty quickly.

With a series of booming sounds and billowing dust, Phinks indeed started fighting with the bored Nobunaga.

Kuroro waved his hand, brushing away the dust particles in the air.

“Nobunaga,” he said, “you’ve just returned, you should get some rest. We have an important mission tomorrow.”

No one responded.

Nobunaga's hand rested on the hilt of his sword. He didn't actually intend to draw his sword; at least, I never saw him draw it. But he was probably used to this stance and couldn't help touching his sword.

Kurt wasn't surprised. He lowered his head and started cutting paper again, the scissors making a swishing sound. By the time he finished cutting the paper figure, the two members of the Phantom Troupe in the distance had already been forced to sit down by Kuroro.

"Rest." Kuroro repeated his command.

Nobunaga lay on the ground, clutching his sword, with his back turned.

Finks was still sitting, stretching his arms a bit, his face showing he hadn't had enough.

But now no one plays along with his antics.

He stood up, tiptoed, waved his hand, walked back and forth a couple of times, and then suddenly reached out and supported himself on the ground to start exercising.

...They really can't stay idle.

Kuroro was able to gather them together and then press them down individually.

That's amazing!

I looked down at the paper figure that Kurt had handed me. Its features were obvious; without a doubt, it was cut out in the likeness of Killua.

Seeing me examining the paper figure, Kurt raised his finger and moved it. The paper figure jumped into my palm and stood still, waving its arms and legs a few times.

I laughed.

"Does your sister like it?" he asked.

I shook my head and returned the paper figure to him.

He looked puzzled.

“I prefer things that are alive and can move without using telekinesis,” I said, then I asked, “Have you ever seen any ability that can make a dead person move like a living person?”

Kurt lowered his head and began to think.

I added, "My dad... seems to be dead."

"I don't know the reason, but when I saw him, he definitely didn't show any signs of being alive. He was shrouded in a strange aura, but outwardly, he looked just like someone who was alive... I wonder if Mother knows this information. Isn't the Adrian family supposed to know everything?"

After hearing this, Kurt seemed to connect the dots and looked surprised. He subconsciously turned his head to look at Kuroro.

I turned my head away too.

Kuroro, who had just calmed Nobunaga and Phinks, seemed to notice something, raised his face, and met my and Kal't's gaze with his dark pupils.

“…I’ve met him before.” Then Kurt said, “At an event once.”

He didn't elaborate.

“It’s Kuroro’s,” I asked.

Instead of answering directly, Kurt changed the subject and brought up something else.

He said softly, "The conditions for initiating this are very complex."

"Why are you telling me this?" I asked. "Whether this ability is complex or not doesn't seem to matter to you."

“Yes,” he said, “but you seem to want to know.”

While we were discussing this, Kuroro had already looked away, leaving only his back to me and Kal't.

I watched his retreating figure.

When he was still my "elder brother," his movements were always graceful yet upright. Now, having shed that identity, his waist is slightly bent and his shoulders are slightly slumped, making him appear much more relaxed and easygoing.

All these details convey the same message: he is not my real brother, but is just trying his best to play the role I want him to be.

But he and that character sometimes overlapped.

Even now, though he's languid, his eyes still look deep and gentle, and he exudes a strangely calm and reassuring aura.

Just like how he has ended his role as my older brother, yet he still searches for my father and spares no expense to "extend" his life.

What was his reason for doing this?

Should his feelings for me be called genuine affection or feigned?

I can't tell anymore.

But the painful experiences I've gone through, time and time again, are etched in my memory, bloodied and raw, telling me:

In any case, I can no longer place any hope on this man.

I want to detach myself from my attachment to him, just as he removed the label of "Adrian's eldest son" from himself.

I lowered my eyes, my gaze drifting aimlessly across the ground for a while as I focused intently on these random thoughts.

Then, after a long while, I finally found my voice again.

“Yes,” I smiled, reassuring the boy in front of me, “I am a little concerned. Thank you, Kurt.”

That feeling that could be entrusted has now completely lost its foothold.

On instinct, I blurted out, with certainty, "You really are the cutest—"

Just like countless times before, back when I was still with the Zoldyck family, I did the same thing.

"I like you the most," I said.

Kurt did not reply.

It was very quiet all around.

I think everyone else present heard our conversation.

But no one said anything. Kuroro put away his phone, stood up, still with his back to me and Kurt, stood by the window, bathed in the moonlight, gazing into the distance.

I'll just pretend they don't exist.

Kurt probably thought so too.

Because very quickly, he asked me.

"And what about my brother?" He was always fixated on this question, "...Killua-nii-san."

The paper figure, which looked just like Killua, lay quietly in his palm.

I laughed: "What about Killua? I haven't seen him in a long time... If it weren't for him, I probably wouldn't be sitting here chatting with you right now."

"Thank goodness you came, otherwise I wouldn't know what to do now," I said.

Kurt lowered his head again, staring at his fan.

The paper figure disappeared into his sleeve as he moved, vanished without a trace.

“He’s grown taller,” he said. “Mom says he might be even taller than his older brother.”

“Kurt,” Kuroro finally spoke, turning half his face away while the other half remained obscured in the darkness. “This isn’t the Zoldyck neighborhood. You can catch up after you leave.”

Kurt silently raised his face and remained silent.

I asked, "May I leave?"

Kuroro remained silent.

"May I leave?" I asked again.

Kuroro looked back at me.

We just stared at each other, as if we were confronting each other about something.

“Of course,” Kuroro said, speaking for Kuroro. “Why not?”

“You don’t need Sister Lei,” he said coldly. “I can help you catch the chained hand.”

“You shouldn’t use her to trade… There’s nothing worth trading for Ray.”

His words became increasingly resounding.

The crack that had been hidden beneath the calm surface finally broke open, revealing the turbulent waves beneath.

“Is that so?” Kuroro smiled. “I thought Illumi would be the one to say it first, but you… you, and that little kid who’s on the opposite side of us, it seems none of you have told your dear older brother about this.”

“I have no complaints about your temper, Kurt, and I’m not going to argue with you about it,” Kuroro said. “During the Phantom Troupe’s operations, the group’s interests should always come first. Using Ray is the safest approach. She has to stay here until things are over, whether you agree or not.”

"And during the time she stayed here, her identity could never have been merely your brother's fiancée, or someone you cared about."

"She is under our joint jurisdiction."

Kurt's imposing manner was overwhelmed by the leader.

He was still not satisfied. He turned his eyes to me, stared at me, and slowly said:

"Until the deal is finalized, none of us—neither you, me, nor Ray—have the right to freedom. ... Everything is for the Phantom Troupe. This is an agreement we made when you joined the Troupe. Are you going to break that agreement, Kurt?"

Under his questioning, Kurt finally shook his head.

Kuroro said, "Alright, now it's time for you to leave Rai's side. ...Don't look at me like that. Your presence with her will affect the Phantom Troupe's activities; you can sense that yourself, can't you?"

“Come here, Kurt.” His command was delivered with an unquestionable tone.

Everything seemed like history repeating itself.

Chrollo looks so much like Illumi, and Kalluto looks so much like Killua bowing his head in front of Illumi.

They always have a lot of strange reasons to drive someone away from me.

In the past, I always failed to see Killua's back.

Because I always feel that having Illumi is perhaps enough.

But now, I've grabbed Kurt.

“No, that won’t work,” I said. “That reason doesn’t hold up…because I won’t interfere with your activities at all.”

Then I asked Kuroro:

"You're the one who should stay away from me, saying such capricious things to Kurt... Are you going to deny it? Are you going to say that you're absolutely unaffected by me, and that I'm just being delusional?"

“It’s alright, just say it if you can,” I said with a smile, ignoring the increasingly awkward atmosphere around me and the obvious, albeit subtle, glances from the other members of the Phantom Troupe. “Anyway, I’m used to it… Sigh, you really don’t care about me at all… Are you going to say that, Mr. Chrollo?”

Go ahead and say it.

Say it.

I expressed my stance to him silently with my eyes.

Say that word, or nod, and then leave my life completely, severing all emotional ties between us.

I'm so looking forward to it.

However, despite my subtle pressure, Kuroro remained inactive for a long time.

"...Why aren't you saying anything?" I tilted my head and asked. "Shouldn't you be very confident in your approval of me? If you just nod in agreement, I will immediately and willingly let go and let Kurt leave."

His answer will be the final judgment between us.

Nod quickly.

I gazed at him with eyes that conveyed that meaning.

—Then we cut ties completely.

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Thank you so much for your support! I will continue to work hard!