memory

After the two of them had a tender moment, they held hands and slowly walked along the bluestone path leading to Xuanhu Lu.

In the medicine garden, various herbs are thriving.

Xie Shangjia pointed to a plant with slender leaves and small red fruits on the top.

"We planted these wolfberries a few days ago. Uncle Wang said soaking them in water can improve eyesight. Li'er should go to school soon. Let's bring her some when we return."

Shen Qianyue paused for a moment, almost unnoticeably: "You've been away from home for so long, I wonder how much the child misses you."

…

Soon, they arrived at Xuanhu Lu.

Before I got close, I felt a burning breath coming towards me, and the air was filled with a rich and complex medicinal fragrance.

At some point, a red medicine furnace with an ancient shape was moved onto the cliff platform, and mist was swirling inside the furnace.

"Valley Master." Shen Qianyue stopped outside the door and called softly.

Shen Yanhui put down the prescription in his hand, turned around when he heard the voice, wiped the sweat off his face with a silk handkerchief, and motioned for them to sit on the clean stone bench next to him.

"You've arrived just in time. I'm currently testing the antidote for this cold poison. I'll need to nurture it for a few more hours to see if it's successful."

Shen Qianyue's eyes fell on the medicine furnace: "After taking this medicine, when will it be effective?"

Shen Yan looked back at Xie Shangjia with a serious look.

"The cold poison has been lingering in his body for a long time and is deeply rooted. Once the medicine is refined, he needs to take it for three consecutive days. These three days will be extremely painful. After that, he will be given auxiliary medicine to warm his body and gradually improve his condition."

"But after all, the foundation has been destroyed, and the lifespan is not as long as others. Your child discovered it early, and the poison has not yet taken effect. It only needs to be suppressed with auxiliary medicine."

There was no fear on Xie Shangjia's face, but instead it was full of hope. He stood up and thanked him respectfully.

"As long as I can recover completely, I will endure the pain. Thank you so much for your hard work, Master."

He looked at Shen Yanhui gratefully, then turned to Shen Qianyue, holding her hand, with a determined light in his eyes.

"When I get better, I can take good care of you and the child!"

Xie Shangjia seemed to remember something, and looked at Shen Yanhui with imperceptible worry.

"Valley Master, please take care of the child. When can I feel the fetus moving? What should I do? Is there anything I should avoid eating? I..."

Shen Yan's eyes became extremely complicated, and she seemed to be hesitant to speak, but finally chose the most direct statement.

"Miss Shen has been worried about something recently. The child is not yet full-term, and she fell and had a bleeding due to external force. The fetus is extremely unstable. The hope of saving the child is only 60%."

Every word was like a heavy hammer hitting Xie Shangjia's heart. The ecstasy of knowing that the cold poison could be cured and the longing for the future were completely shattered at this moment.

His face turned pale as paper in an instant. Childbirth is already a life-threatening situation for women, and with a 60% chance, he had to gamble with Shen Qianyue's life.

“Pah—”

Xie Shangjia raised his hand and slapped himself hard, then collapsed to the ground with weak legs.

"It's all my fault. I'm such a loser. I caused you to fall. I..."

His voice was broken, he looked up at Shen Qianyue's lower abdomen, and gently pulled the hem of her skirt with his hand.

"I'm sorry... I..."

Shen Qianyue squatted down, hugged him, felt his body trembling violently, and patted his head.

"It's okay, Shang Jia, please wait here for me. I have something I want to ask the Valley Master in private."

Xie Shangjia nodded dejectedly.

Shen Qianyue opened the bamboo door for Shen Yanhui, and the two walked in. The bamboo door closed gently behind them.

Outside the door, Xie Shangjia leaned on the cold stone bench, his body trembling slightly, and the flames of the medicine furnace reflected his pale profile.

Shen Qianyue's voice was low, but every word was clear.

"May I ask, Valley Master, Shang Jia's memories...were lost due to external impact. So, can they be restored by external stimulation?"

Shen Yanhui was stunned for a moment when he heard this, and almost instantly guessed what she was thinking, and his tone was unprecedentedly solemn.

"Memory loss isn't a disease. It's the 'mark' left behind by near-death experiences caused by stimulation or external forces, just like the pottery in this medicine furnace that's been burned by the fire. The mark remains."

"It's not a cold or high fever that can be cured with a few herbal remedies, nor is it a broken bone that can be reconnected with acupuncture needles. Regardless of whether you successfully recover your memory or not, your body will be injured if you have an unexpected miscarriage."

Shen Qianyue was silent, her fingertips curled up unconsciously, hiding the darkness in her eyes.

"Master, could you please give me a medicine for miscarriage? It would be inconvenient to buy it back in Beijing. Qianyue trusts you."

Instead of waiting passively, it is better to... take the initiative and try once. If there is a glimmer of hope, it is worse than no hope at all. If he does not recover his memory, it is God's will.

Less than a month has passed since the three-month leave granted by the imperial decree, and returning to Beijing is imminent. The situation in the capital is changing rapidly, and various forces are intertwined.

Xie Shangjia had forgotten the most important memory. He could not tell friend from foe in the court, yet he sat in the high position of a second-rank official. Serving as an official in the court like this was like a child carrying gold in a busy city, which was a fatal flaw.

Xie Shangjia once said that he wanted to see the desert. If this stimulation could not restore his memory, then let him go. The two attacks of poison made Shen Qianyue realize that compared with his life, the imperial family was nothing.

People can't be too greedy...

Shen Yan looked back at her resolute eyes, knowing that it was futile to persuade her further, and smiled.

"You really are like King Dingwu, courageous and resourceful, willing to do anything to achieve your goals."

Shen Qianyue frowned: "Has the Valley Master met King Dingwu?"

Shen Yanhui had no intention of hiding anything and spoke frankly.

"Thirteen years ago, I was collecting herbs on the Nanman border when the Northern Di Kingdom suddenly attacked and abducted many civilians. He saved me. I worked as a military doctor for a while under a pseudonym. At that time, you were the military advisor and conducted in-depth examinations. We had never met before."

"But you're quite famous. None of your strategies have ever failed. I took over this cold poison because of your reputation. Now that I've met you in person, I know seeing is believing."

Shen Qianyue was really surprised. She thought that the other party's praise when they first met was just a small talk. She didn't expect that the two of them had worked together even though they had never met.

"Valley Master, you are so kind. I am honored to have your appreciation. If I can be of any use to you in the future, I am willing to help you."

Shen Yanhui asked curiously, "You've lived in the harem for a long time now. Do you ever regret it? Wouldn't it be much freer to stay in the frontier with Prince Dingwu, and would you have more power at your disposal?"

It's more than just freedom. King Dingwu Xie Zhiyun is like a local tyrant in the frontier, and he is willing to let a woman like Shen Qianyue take power.

Shen Qianyue smiled, her mind turning over and over again, and after thinking for a while, she spoke.

"There's nothing much to say about love. We both had our own difficulties back then. Whoever showed up when we needed him the most was the right person. Besides, Shang Jia is a very good person."

Shen Yanhui patted Shen Qianyue's thin shoulder soothingly with her hand that smelled of medicine, but did not express any opinion.

There are thousands of different kinds of women in the world. Some like to be free and unrestrained, some want to stay together forever, with a husband and children, and some like to be in power...

No one is superior to anyone else, everyone just has different preferences. Being content is the greatest happiness.

…

The bamboo door was pushed open.

Xie Shangjia looked up at Shen Qianyue, wiped his tears, and made a decision in his heart.

If the arrival of the child would endanger Shen Qianyue's life, then he must not be kept.

Shen Qianyue had a gentle smile on her face, which diluted the coldness and paleness between her brows, like the slightly melting ice and snow in early spring, which, although still chilly, tried hard to emit a little warmth.

"Why are you like this?"

Xie Shangjia hugged her tightly: "I've figured it out. We can't have this child. Your body..."

Shen Qianyue pushed his chest, reached out, and gently wiped away the moisture that had seeped out from the corners of his eyes with her fingertips. Her movements were gentle and soothing.

"The Valley Master just took my pulse again and said that I was just too excited that time, which led to her mistaking my pulse. The child is healthy, so don't worry too much."

Her voice was unusually gentle, even with a hint of anger in it.

Xie Shangjia held Shen Qianyue's hand tightly with his backhand, as if he had grabbed a life-saving straw, staring at her intently, as if he couldn't believe his ears, and his tone was a little stuttering.

"Really? Don't lie to me. I don't want you to risk your life for the child."

Shen Qianyue met his gaze with a natural smile on her face. She took his hand and gently placed it on her lower abdomen. Her palm covered the back of Xie Shangjia's hand.

"Of course it's true, but the fetus is a little weak. The baby is fine."

Xie Shangjia burst into laughter and caressed her belly through her clothes with great care, his eyes filled with great joy and fear of regaining what he had lost.

"I was really scared just now... I was afraid that something might happen to you because of the child..."

Shen Qianyue let him do what he wanted, maintaining a faint but soothing smile on her face.

The black cat walked over slowly, shook off its wet fur, held a live fish in its mouth, placed it at Shen Qianyue's feet, looked up at her, and there seemed to be a hint of concern in its golden cat eyes.

After returning from Xuanhu Lu, Xie Shangjia seemed to be injected with new energy. He didn't even bother to rest and forced Shen Qianyue to lie on the bed.

"Just lie down here and rest or read a book. Don't work yourself up. I'm going to find my second brother and tell him the good news!"

After Xie Shangjia finished speaking, he rushed to the guesthouse where Xie Shangyu was staying like a gust of wind.

"Second brother! Second brother!"

Xie Shangjia's voice was filled with irrepressible excitement, and his voice arrived before he even showed up.

Xie Shangyu was wiping his sword in the yard. He looked up when he heard the sound and saw his brother's excited look. He put down his sword and went to meet him.

"What happened? Why are you in such a hurry?"

Xie Shangjia grabbed his hand, with a bright smile on his face without any gloom, and asked anxiously.

"Second brother! Tell me quickly, what should pregnant women eat? Are there any special requirements?"

He asked questions like a student eager to learn, his heart and eyes full of anticipation and care for the little life that had not yet taken shape.

Xie Shangyu thought of Shen Yanhui's words, took a deep breath, and pressed his hands on his brother's shoulders, which were trembling with excitement. His eyes were solemn and his voice was so low that it was almost difficult to understand.

"Shang Jia...don't worry about the child. There are some things that my second brother must tell you..."

He paused, looking at the pure light in Xie Shangjia's eyes, and almost couldn't bear to break it, but he still hardened his heart, thinking that a short pain is worse than a long one, so he told her that the child might not be saved.

"You can't force things when it comes to children. Your health is the most important thing. You need to be mentally prepared..."