Chapter 69 I Want You From the Heart

When Su Guanqing regained consciousness, he found that his pain had eased considerably. His limbs seemed to be floating in a warm cloud, which was very comfortable. His fingers, in particular, felt their blocked meridians were now unblocked.

He slowly opened his eyes, and heard Jiang Tong's anxious and concerned voice: "Guan Qing! How are you feeling? Are you feeling better? Is it still painful?"

"Tongtong..." Su Guanqing murmured.

"I'm here," Jiang Tong sat on Su Guanqing's couch, rubbing his fingers back and forth with her hands. "How's it going? I asked someone to heat up the kang. Do you feel better?"

Su Guanqing moved his mouth slightly, but said nothing.

Jiang Tong put down his hand, wiped the sweat from his forehead with a handkerchief, and said to him gently, "Don't be afraid, Guanqing, I'm always here."

"Tongtong..." Su Guanqing let out a low whimper between his lips and teeth, and a layer of mist appeared in his unfocused eyes.

"I'm here, I'm here." Jiang Tong held his hand, gently placed it on her lips and kissed it.

"I thought you would never talk to me again."

Jiang Tong leaned over and hugged him: "No, never again."

…

The next morning, Su Guanqing, fully awake, felt a little dazed. Did Tongtong seem to have come last night? Or was he dreaming?

He moved his hands and found something soft and warm in his hands. It seemed to be... a hand?!

"Awake?" Jiang Tong's voice came from my ears.

Su Guanqing was suddenly startled, shook his hands off and sat up.

"Tongtong?! Why are you here?"

"I passed by last night and heard you crying out in pain, so I came in to see you." Jiang Tong stretched and sat up from the bed.

"You! You slept here with me last night?!" Su Guanqing's eyes widened when he felt the movement of the bed. Wasn't that an illusion caused by the extreme pain he felt?

"Didn't you hug me and cry last night and wouldn't let me leave?" Jiang Tong said righteously.

Su Guanqing had just woken up when he was frightened out of his wits by this series of information. He couldn't utter a word for a long time.

Jiang Tong pulled his hand over, looked at it carefully, rubbed it a few times, and asked, "How is it? Does it still hurt today?"

Su Guanqing suddenly came back to his senses, pulled his hand back, and forced a serious expression: "Tongtong, you shouldn't have come to my place. It's the middle of the night, a man and a woman alone in the same room. If it gets out..."

"It's already spread." Jiang Tong said casually.

Su Guanqing's body stiffened: "What?"

"Last night you were in so much pain you lost consciousness. I ordered people to heat the kang and call a doctor. It was a huge commotion. I know everything I need to know now."

Su Guanqing's face turned pale when he heard this.

Jiang Tong smirked and leaned closer to him, whispering in his ear, "When the doctor came, you were still holding me, refusing to let go. Even when I was soaking your hands in the medicine, you were soaking them in my arms."

Su Guanqing stuttered, "Tongtong, you, you, this is not a joke. You, you can't lie to me."

Jiang Tong grabbed his hand and put it under his nose: "Smell it yourself and see if there is still a smell of medicine. At that time, you refused to soak your hands honestly, so I held you and pressed your hands into the medicine. There were two of us, four hands soaked together. My hands also smell of medicine."

Su Guanqing could smell the strong medicinal odor on his fingers, and his expression changed drastically. He retreated several feet until he leaned against the wall. Then he said in a trembling voice, "Tongtong, you're confused! Why do you have to care about me? Do you know that if you do this, I'll ruin your reputation?"

He held his head, sinking into a deep state of autism: "Go away, go away quickly. Stay away from me."

However, Jiang Tong refused to leave. She simply climbed onto the bed and sat next to Su Guanqing.

Sensing Jiang Tong's approach, Su Guanqing became anxious and annoyed. "Tongtong! What are you trying to do?! I've made it very clear: we're done with each other. You're going to be the princess, so how can you be so careless about your reputation?"

"Are you done?" Jiang Tong sat beside him with legs bent, looking at him coldly.

"That's it." Su Guanqing muttered softly, and moved a little away from Jiang Tong.

Jiang Tong just watched him move, his fox eyes narrowed slightly, revealing a hint of danger.

"You know what I mean. A girl's reputation is the most important thing." Su Guanqing added.

"Yes, a girl's reputation is the most important thing. As the saying goes, 'Starving to death is a small matter, but losing one's chastity is a great matter.' If one loses one's reputation, one won't be able to marry into a good family." Jiang Tong simply leaned against the wall and snorted coldly, "Has anyone ever asked me if I want to get married?"

Su Guanqing looked up in surprise.

"Three obediences and four virtues," Jiang Tong chuckled. "Su Guanqing, which one do you think I have?"

Su Guanqing moved his lips slightly, but he was too embarrassed to say it out loud.

"Before I got married, I stopped obeying my father's wishes. Do you think I'll be able to follow my husband's wishes after I get married?"

Su Guanqing shook his head truthfully. Even if their engagement was still there, he never expected Tongtong to listen to him.

"A woman's virtue requires that her talent be kept under wraps," she said, looking sideways at him with undisguised pride, "but who among the literati and scholars of the capital doesn't know the name of me, the painter Jiang?"

Jiang Tong turned her head back and looked at the curtains on the bed. "Women's teachings emphasize chastity, purity, and obedience. Who would I obey? Women's teachings teach women to beautify their appearance, but I'm too lazy to even put on makeup. As for women's skills, that's even more ridiculous. Needlework, cleaning, preparing food, managing the household... I don't know any of them. My mother once forced me to learn these things, but I would rather climb a tree and catch birds than learn."

Jiang Tong curled the corners of his lips, revealing a hint of sarcasm: "I don't buy into any of your tricks. Don't try to frame me with this trick."

Su Guanqing knew that Jiang Tong had been like this since childhood, and he never thought there was anything wrong with it.

He even stood in front of Jiang Huaishan when he wanted to discipline his daughter. At that moment, he naively thought that he could protect Jiang Tong like this for the rest of her life and let her live freely forever.

But now he doesn't have this ability.

He couldn't protect her.

The only thing he could do now was to persuade her to choose a path that was relatively easier and less likely to cause public outrage.

Su Guanqing spoke with difficulty: "Tongtong, you were young before, and your uncle and aunt spoiled you, so you could be willful for a while. But you are seventeen years old this year. When you marry into the palace, you can no longer act so recklessly..."

"Reckless? How could I ever be reckless? I've never been reckless," Jiang Tong interrupted him, a hint of anger in her tone. "You've engaged me twice, and did anyone ever ask for my opinion? You've made me marry whoever you wanted me to, without ever asking if I was willing. And now you're saying I'm reckless?"

Su Guanqing looked a little aggrieved. The people who arranged her engagement were her parents and elders, not him.

Jiang Tong saw through his thoughts and pointed out, "Su Guanqing, you're not innocent either. When I told you I didn't like you and didn't want to marry you, and asked you to break off the engagement, did you listen to my opinion? Now that I'm saying I like you and want to be with you, you're pushing me away again. When you made this decision, did you ask me what I thought? Don't I feel bad? Su Guanqing, tell me, who is the willful one?"

These words made Su Guanqing feel as if his heart was being cut by a knife. He clenched his fists and endured the excruciating pain brought by the deformed healed bones, as if this would make him feel better.

"I'm sorry, Tongtong, I've made up my mind about this matter. Even if I'm sorry for you..."

"Su Guanqing, I didn't ask your wishes."

Su Guanqing was stunned.

"Since you say I'm reckless, I might as well be reckless for once," Jiang Tong said. "Your ideas change so quickly, I'm too lazy to ask for your opinion. Think whatever you want. I only care about what I want."

"What...what do you want?" Su Guanqing's voice was trembling.

"I want you."

Su Guanqing's mind buzzed and exploded, and it took him a while to recover. He smiled bitterly: "Tongtong, stop making trouble. You know I can't marry you."

Jiang Tong chuckled: "Su Guanqing, don't be so self-indulgent. When did I ever say that I want to marry you?"

Su Guanqing blinked blankly. He couldn't answer this question. Tongtong didn't seem to have said she wanted to marry him. She seemed to be saying...

Jiang Tong had already moved in front of Su Guanqing, and brushed her hand across his handsome cheek: "I only said that I would marry you home."

By the time Su Guanqing reacted, Jiang Tong had already approached, and her hot breath was on his face. He panicked and wanted to escape: "Tongtong...don't do this...this won't do...mmmm..."

But Jiang Tong was not willing to let him run away. She leaned over, pressed down on the panicked Su Guanqing, and blocked him in the corner, and kissed him on the lips.

…

Under Jiang Tong's domineering suppression, the two of them were "reconciled as before."

Jiang Tong would come in person early in the morning to take Su Guanqing to the study.

If Su Guanqing was unwilling, Zhao Quesheng and Jiang Tong would cooperate with him. They would just grab one of his arms and pretend to lift him up and drag him over, and he would have no choice but to compromise and follow them obediently.

In his study, Su Guanqing had originally decided to remain silent and motionless, like a puppet. But he couldn't stand Zhao Quesheng's constant questions.

He didn't know why the child would become silent every time he was talking, and in the end it was him and Jiang Tong who were discussing.

Su Guanqing was really annoyed by the teacher and student, and he couldn't keep up his cold face.

"Guan Qing, I have to go out and deliver a calligraphy and painting. Please come with me." Jiang Tong said as he carefully rolled up a scroll that had just been framed in his hand and put it into a brocade bag.

"I won't go." Su Guanqing immediately refused. He didn't want everyone in the capital to see their intimacy.

Jiang Tong came over and pulled him: "Let's go."

Su Guanqing sat upright with his head held high, like a green pine tree: "I said I won't go!"

"Who asked if you were willing?" Jiang Tong blinked twice. "Quesheng, help your master up."

"yes!"

Su Guanqing was so angry that his fair face turned red: "You! You are going too far!"

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The author has something to say: [1] Quoted from the posthumous letter of the Cheng brothers