Alternative Title: 和陀思網戀社死後撕了他劇本
Author: 這靈芝有毒
Status: Completed
Added: 3 hours ago
Updated: 3 hours ago
The full title is: "I went to meet my online boyfriend but after a social death incident with one Russian sentence, I found out he was part of the Scriptwriting Group, so I decided to tear up his script."
CP: Dazai. After meeting online, both sides crashed and burned. There was no intention to scheme, but a cat-girl who unknowingly caused a butterfly effect vs. a rat who schemed all the time but actually lost because he was serious.
My name is Kawakami Nui. Three years ago, I picked up a gloomy Russian teenager during a late-night online chat. He loved playing the cello very much (he claimed it was a cello). Later, I blurted out a confession: "If you lose your faith, I'll be your new god!"
At a coffee shop in Yokohama, I could finally meet him in person. So, following what my bandage-loving friend taught me, I tried it out: "Suka Blyat!"
Ka-crash! His coffee cup shattered on the spot.
Then I realized—
Good news: I awakened a superpower!
Bad news: Danmaku floated above his head:
【Leader of the Book of the Dead Rats, member of the Decay of Angels.】
【Favorability: 60%】
【Killing Intent: 60%.】
Damn! My online dating partner is actually the天花板 of the Scriptwriting Group!
Later I found out:
Phi-san, who blew bubbles with me, his White Whale would crash in a few days.
The fat man who just learned to fold origami cranes, his "Cannibalism" bento included a portion for me.
And I, always "accidentally" crushed his plans.
"What do you want?" His purple eyes shone with a dangerous light.
I swirled my sparkling water: "Didn't we agree? To come be your... —"
"New girlfriend?"
"New god?"
I didn't tell him that the danmaku had turned into:
【Favorability: 89%】【Killing Intent: 93%】
【Urge to kiss: 100%】
—
Phi's Diary of Disasters:
Today, that self-proclaimed god-like dumb cat ruined my plans again.
I planned the White Whale's fall, she wrote a novel for Phi-san.
I planned "Cannibalism," she taught my subordinate Japanese, making me so mad my stomach hurt.
Then she folded several origami cranes. And turned around to join the Armed Detective Agency.
Kawakami Nui is the enemy.
But she also let me stay over at her house on a rainy night, and brought me fever patches when I had a high fever.
When my schemes entered the middle stage, and she threatened my life with her own—
Phi finally pulled her into his arms:
"Abandoning a believer so casually... you'll遭天谴 (be struck by divine retribution)."
*Main text is in third person.
*1v1. Aside from the main CP and the original canon pairs, I won't ship other characters arbitrarily.
*Only serialized on JJWXC. If it appears on other platforms, it is pirated. Pirated versions may have garbled text, messy formatting, and missing paragraphs. The author sometimes goes back to revise the text, so viewing pirated versions might not provide a good experience.
*Meeting in the real world + resolving the synopsis occurs in Chapter 19.
Content Tags: Comprehensive Manga, Shonen, Sweet, Bungou Stray Dogs, Relaxing, Healing.
Kawakami Nui (kawakaminyai) Fyodor Cat Nui Witch and Werewolf Witch and Werewolf 2 Otaku 2 Otaku High School Nui.
Others: Includes Haikyuu!!, Black Jack.
One-sentence Intro: Wanna date? The kind where you die.
Theme: Positivity, Love for Life.