Chapter 4 The Difference Between Love and Not Love

Chapter Four: The Difference Between Love and Not Love

The Emperor arrived, just like in his previous life; he came to help Mu Hanyan out of her predicament.

A figure in bright yellow robes stepped into the hall. He was tall and straight with a cold and stern face. It was Li Qianche. The concubines' eyes immediately turned to him, their gazes following him with infatuation. They all hoped to catch a glimpse of the emperor. Since entering the palace, none of them had truly won the emperor's favor. Previously, Consort Su had been obstructing them at every turn. Now that Consort Su had been demoted to a low-ranking concubine, who wouldn't want to seize the opportunity and become the next person to win the emperor's favor?

Li Qiancha ignored her completely, walking straight to the Empress Dowager. After bowing to her, he said in a calm but unquestionable tone, "Mother, Consort Wan is unwell. Let her rise." Before he finished speaking, he had already personally helped Mu Hanyan up and ordered someone to offer her a seat. The Empress Dowager's fingertips trembled slightly, but she ultimately remained silent. Seeing this, the other concubines could not hide their jealousy and disappointment.

The Empress Dowager suppressed her anger and said coldly, "I don't know what makes Consort Wan so special that the Emperor bestowed upon her the title of Consort without even discussing it? Besides, she is so frail; how can she possibly bear children for the royal family in the future?"

A faint smile played on Li Qianche's lips, his voice cold and clear: "During my inspection tour, I was poisoned and assassinated. Consort Wan, who comes from a family of doctors, cured me of the poison and healed my wounds. Her family is all gone, and she is all alone, so I brought her back to the palace. After returning to the palace, I was busy with many affairs and did not have time to inform the Empress Dowager. Will the Empress Dowager have the heart to punish me?"

The Empress Dowager's expression softened slightly, and she ultimately did not want to argue with the Emperor: "Since that's the case, Consort Wan has rendered meritorious service in saving the Emperor, and it is only right that she be made a consort. However, she still needs to be carefully taught about palace rules and etiquette."

After listening, Li Qianche took a sip of tea and said calmly, "No rush. Consort Wan is currently in poor health. It's not too late to learn after she has recovered."

The Empress Dowager said no more, her gaze sweeping over the crowd before finally settling on the quiet figure at the far end of the table. Su Su sat with her eyes lowered, seemingly oblivious to everything around her. Upon seeing this, the Empress Dowager's lips curled slightly, and she said meaningfully, "Since Consort Wan has been kind to the Emperor, she should be rewarded handsomely." She then ordered the palace servants to bring the finest ginseng, a red gold ruyi hairpin, and more than ten bolts of Jiangnan brocade, which she bestowed upon Mu Hanyan.

"As Mother Empress arranges," Li Qianche nodded in agreement, but his gaze swept across the hall like a drifting cloud, finally settling on Su Su in the corner.

She had lost a considerable amount of weight, and the plain palace dress she wore seemed somewhat loose, outlining her slender shoulders. Her head was lowered, her long eyelashes like raven feathers covering her eyes, making her as quiet as a forgotten porcelain doll.

Such obedience, ironically, makes one uneasy.

The Su Su he remembered was always bright and flamboyant. She would smash a teacup because of his cold look, and her eyes would well up with tears if he glanced at someone else. But now, she lowered her head and lowered her eyes, as if she had hidden all her sharpness into her bones.

Has she truly learned her lesson? Or... is this just a new tactic of feigning retreat to advance?

But this sudden, complete obedience was like a dull knife, silently cutting into his heart.

Su Su lowered her eyes and remained silent, her fingertips unconsciously twirling the simple lotus pattern embroidered with plain silver thread on her cuff. The conversation of everyone in the hall came through clearly—even the palace rules were made exceptions for her; this was probably the difference between love and indifference.

Images from her past life flooded back like a tide: the poisoned wine in the cold palace, her father and brothers imprisoned, and the blinding composure of Mu Hanyan when she became pregnant with his child. She gently closed her eyes, a bitter taste rising in her throat that was hard to swallow. So this was how giving her heart away could end up.

Consort Wan rose gracefully to express her gratitude, her waist swaying like a willow in the wind, her eyes calm and composed. Following the Emperor's gaze, she looked towards the corner with a hint of doubt. After the Empress Dowager finished admiring the gold and jade, she held Mu Hanyan's hand and earnestly instructed her on the matter of having children. The eyes of all the concubines in the hall burned with jealousy, but Su Su seemed to be detached from it all.

After paying their respects to the Empress Dowager, the Emperor, accompanied by Mu Hanyan, was the first to depart. The concubines also took their leave in order, their jeweled ornaments and laughter fading into the distance. Su Su, being of the lowest rank, waited quietly to the side as the noise and fragrance of the palace dissipated. Only then did she silently follow at the very end of the crowd, walking calmly back to the remote Changxin Palace along the long palace path.

The Empress Dowager gazed at Su Su's receding figure, her fingertips slowly twirling the Buddhist prayer beads on her wrist, as if deep in thought.

The trusted maidservant beside her whispered, "Your Majesty, Consort Su seems like a completely different person. She didn't utter a word in the hall just now, and even when Consort Zhuang made sarcastic remarks, she only listened politely."

The Empress Dowager's eyes remained unmoved, but her tone revealed a deeper meaning: "If she had seen the Emperor favoring others so much in the past, she would have smashed her cups and made a scene long ago, but today she is as quiet as a clay statue."

She paused slightly, as if puzzled: "It's like... someone whose soul has been taken away."

Granny Duan stepped forward and softly echoed, "Having gone through such a storm, Consort Su must know when to advance and when to retreat, and how to restrain herself. If she can calm down from now on, it will be her good fortune."

The Empress Dowager nodded slightly, a hint of pity flashing in her eyes, but her tone remained calm: "Send word to the Su family that the selection of someone to enter the palace should be postponed. Since it is necessary to temper her temperament, let her have some more time to calm down."

"Yes." Granny Duan acknowledged the order and withdrew. She knew that the Empress Dowager still cared about this niece, and that the so-called trials were merely paving the way for her future.

When Su Su returned to Changxin Palace, she was so exhausted that she could barely move her skirt. She leaned against a pillar and gently massaged her aching legs, asking Qiu Ju, "Has there been any reply from home? I wonder if Father and Brother received the letter I asked Xiao Anzi to take out earlier?" She had specifically instructed them not to let her matter disrupt the household arrangements.

Qiuju hurriedly replied, "This servant will go to the Imperial Kitchen to ask Xiao Anzi." The winter blue brick path was still chilly, and she ran all the way back. By the time she returned with the food box, the sun was already high in the sky. "My lady, Xiao Anzi says it's time for you to eat." She gently placed a letter on the table, her fingertips slightly red from the cold.

Su Su unfolded the letter, her father's familiar handwriting immediately coming into view. But as she read, her fingers gradually tightened, leaving fine marks on the edges of the letter. It turned out that during her confinement, the clan elders had begun searching for a successor, and her cousin Su Linyue, from the second branch of the family, who had always been at odds with her, was now being considered as her replacement. The letter rustled softly in her hands, a faint sound, like the silent tearing apart of an old pact between the Empress Dowager and the eldest branch of the Su family.

Chunlan couldn't help but say indignantly, "What do they take our young mistress for? When she was in power, they all flocked to her. Now that she's in trouble, they're eager to send people from the second branch of the family up to curry favor."

Qiu Ju slammed her fist on the table in anger: "This is outrageous! Aren't they afraid of the Empress Dowager's wrath...?"

“If the Empress Dowager doesn’t agree, how dare they act rashly?” Su Su slowly folded the letter, put it back into the envelope, and gently stroked the seal with her fingertips.

Qiuju's voice choked with sobs: "But the Empress Dowager... the Empress Dowager watched the young master grow up..."

“As the Emperor gains more power, the Empress Dowager’s life in the palace is not easy either. Even if she is reluctant, the clan elders will push her to make this decision in order to protect their own interests.” Su Su said calmly, “We just need to take care of ourselves and not worry about other things.”

She paused slightly, a faint smile playing on her lips. "It doesn't matter who they choose, as long as they don't disturb my peace." She then handed the letter to Chunlan: "Burn it."

The flames leaped up, gradually engulfing the letter and turning it into a wisp of smoke, as if burning away all the obsessions of the past.

Su Su opened the food box, and the aroma filled the air. The glistening Dongpo pork shone with an amber luster, the green and white shrimp nestled among the tender asparagus, and the Kung Pao chicken was soaked in clear red oil. This seemed to far exceed the portion that a lady-in-waiting should receive. Seeing the lady's confusion, Qiu Ju quickly explained, "Xiao Anzi just relayed a message that the Emperor is overjoyed with the frequent reports of victories from the front lines and has specially ordered a banquet for the six palaces to celebrate."

It makes sense. With the beautiful Mu Hanyan by his side and the war going so smoothly at the front, the Emperor is naturally delighted. Seeing that the dishes were delicious and beautifully presented, Su Su invited Qiu Ju and Chun Lan, who were still indignant, to sit down and enjoy the food. Upon seeing the delicacies on the table, the two temporarily put aside their worries, picked up their chopsticks, and smiled at each other.

The trembling piece of Dongpo pork melted between her lips and teeth. The rich, oily flavor acted like a key, suddenly unlocking the prison of her memories. In her past life, to win the emperor's favor, she had starved herself to the point of feeling lightheaded; even eating meat was a calculated luxury. In the cold palace, even grass roots became her life-saving sustenance. Thinking of this, she almost laughed out loud. Although she was now in a lowly position, being able to freely enjoy such a delicacy was already a blessing from heaven. How could she let it go to waste? With her inner knot untied, she and those around her began to eat, the only sound in the room the gentle clinking of bowls and chopsticks.