Chapter 44

◎Shi Xiaonan's Diary◎

The actor who plays Shi Xiaonan's younger brother in "Reenactment" is called Zheng Qi.

Zheng Qi is nineteen years old this year, and "Reenactment" is his first film since entering the industry.

After Xie Yan contacted him, the two waited for more than ten minutes. Zheng Qi entered the live broadcast room, gave gifts worth several hundred yuan, and then applied to join the three-person connection.

This was the first time Qianyang knew that the Qingning platform could also support multiplayer connections.

"Hello, Master Qianyang, I am Zheng Qi."

"Hello."

Zheng Qi and Xie Yan were in completely different states, as if they had not finished their work yet. They were still wearing their costumes and headgear, and greeted Qian Yang with a smile.

"Hello everyone in the live broadcast room, I'm Zheng Qi, and I play Shi Xiaonan's younger brother in 'Reenactment'."

There are too many online viewers in Qianyang’s live broadcast room, so this is a good opportunity to promote myself.

Hello, hello.

[Got a new role? Congratulations.]

[This younger brother's acting skills are indeed quite good, and he has a bright future.]

[Is the next one a costume drama? The styling is pretty good.]

Qian Yang asked, "Xie Yan said you often had nightmares before. What did you dream about?"

Speaking of this, Zheng Qi couldn't help but sigh and said, "I always dream of a woman. She cries to me every night. Many times I know it's a dream, but I can't wake up no matter what. Sometimes I even have a dream within a dream."

"Master Qianyang, to be honest, during that time, Sister Xie Yan and I were in a similar state. I felt like I was living in a daze every day. It was only at the end of last year that I accidentally saw your live broadcast online. I listened to your advice, recited the Heart Sutra several times every morning, and got some sun. My situation has improved a bit, and now I can go out to work."

Qianyang nodded. "Besides that, did you dream of anything that left a deep impression on you?"

Hearing this, Zheng Qi fell into deep thought. After a few seconds of recollection, he said, "I vaguely remember that she seemed to be looking for something, and she kept muttering something like 'where, where'."

"Didn't she hurt you in your dream?" Qian Yang asked.

Zheng Qi shook his head and said, "No, she just kept crying."

"Master, is the woman in my dream the ghost of Shi Xiaonan?"

"Um."

"Did she lose something?"

"It's possible."

Qianyang lowered his eyes thoughtfully. It seemed that he could not find any breakthrough from the two of them.

To find out the truth, you must go to Shi Xiaonan’s former residence.

Is she going there in person?

"Master, I live where Shi Xiaonan once lived."

After listening to Qian Yang's words, Xie Yan said.

"...What?" Qianyang was stunned.

Xie Yan explained, "After the film was finished, I moved to the city where she lived to learn more about her. However, after arriving here, my condition worsened, and I rarely left the house. If there's anything you need to know, I can try to help."

Qian Yang asked, "Where is her former residence?"

Xie Yan said, "Due to rumors that she turned into a ghost after her death, the house where she hanged herself has been abandoned for many years, and there are basically no people living around it."

"Let's go and have a look, maybe we can find some clues."

"good……"

After Shi Xiaonan's death, her resentment might attach to the things she used frequently during her lifetime.

Summer was approaching and the weather was hot. Xie Yan was wearing a hooded sweatshirt that was too big for her, making her look even skinnier. She seemed to dislike the sun, so she put on a double-layer mask and sunglasses, covering her whole body tightly.

While she was walking to Shi Xiaonan's former residence, Qian Yang asked her about the current situation of Shi Xiaonan's family.

Xie Yan said, "After Shi Xiaonan passed away, his family immigrated abroad and haven't been back for more than ten years. I don't know what they are doing now."

"Then her grave..."

At this moment, Xie Yan laughed almost sarcastically, "A cemetery? We still don't know where her ashes are."

Ah, this...

[Is there not even a cemetery? ]

[It is said that her family did not disclose her burial location to prevent disturbance.]

[So, even if they bought the cemetery, no one has ever visited her in all these years?]

[Emmm, forget about outsiders, but as a family whose blood is thicker than water, are you really just going to walk away? ]

[They probably feel guilty, right? Shi Xiaonan's suicide might have some hidden reason.]

Xie Yan's residence was not far from Shi Xiaonan's former residence. After about half an hour's walk, they arrived at a deserted neighborhood.

The closer you get to here, the fewer people there are on the road.

When we got to this block, there was almost no one to be seen.

All the houses here have their doors closed, and the words "demolished by the end of the year" are spray-painted in red on the walls.

Xie Yan walked to a building and said, "She lives on the seventh floor."

"Go up."

"good."

The walls of the old house, built more than ten years ago, were already dilapidated and the elevator was blocked by some old furniture. Xie Yan took out a flashlight from her sweatshirt and walked into the narrow and dim stairwell.

There was a lot of dust and debris piled up in the stairwell, and one could barely find a way up by avoiding the things on the ground.

It was extremely dark in here. The doors to the safety passage had been destroyed. Looking into the corridor inside, it was pitch black.

Xie Yan walked up silently, coughing occasionally.

Qianyang asked, "Have you ever been to this place?"

Xie Yan said: "...No, this is the first time."

"Why?"

"I don't know, I just don't want to come."

Thank you. I don’t want to come either.

[Has no horror film director thought of filming here? How terrifying.]

She dared to go up, and I didn't dare to look.

【What if something suddenly pops up? 】

[Wow, this place is so scary.]

Xie Yan continued to walk up. When she reached the fifth floor, the flashlight swept across the ground and suddenly a skeleton of an animal appeared.

Xie Yan paused for a moment and actually took a step forward to see more clearly.

"It looks like a stray cat." Xie Yan said in a deep voice.

"Keep going."

[Master, is there anything weird in here? ]

【(Specially referring to ghosts.】

Qian Yang said: "No, it's cleaner here."

Finally, Xie Yan arrived at the seventh floor.

Similar to the situation on the floors below, the security door on this floor had long been destroyed and was wide open.

Xie Yan walked in with a flashlight, almost without hesitation.

The floor of this floor was still littered with all sorts of rusty debris. Since the outer walls of the entire building were sealed, not a single ray of light could penetrate the corridor, and one could only barely discern the road ahead by the light of a flashlight.

As the flashlight beam passed over the debris on the ground, a winding stream of red rusty water flowed to the ground below. Xie Yan seemed to see nothing. Since entering this floor, she stopped talking and walked straight forward with direction and purpose, as if she was very familiar with this place.

The sound of her footsteps over the debris on the ground became faster and more urgent as she went deeper into the floor. Finally, she stopped in front of a closed security door.

The lock of the security door had been broken, leaving only a dark hole with a piece of water-soaked yellow talisman paper stuck on it, making it almost unrecognizable.

"arrive."

Xie Yan finally spoke, her voice hoarse.

"Let's go in and take a look."

"Um……"

Xie Yan reached out and pushed open the door, and her fingertips were immediately covered with a thick layer of dust. However, when the flashlight beam shone inside, she was surprised to find that the room was empty. Except for the dust on the floor and the outline of the cabinet against the wall, there was nothing there. It could even be called clean.

Xie Yan stood at the door and said in a daze: "After Shi Xiaonan died, most of the things in the house were burned."

"She left behind nothing except those so-called handwritten novels."

Qian Yang said: "Well, show me around the room."

Xie Yan walked into the room and looked around with a flashlight. There was nothing in the room. Everything that could be dismantled had already been dismantled, leaving nothing behind except for some skeletons that were inconvenient to dismantle and difficult to burn.

"This is her bedroom."

Xie Yan came to a closed room. Unlike other rooms, even the floor tiles were broken.

"Let me see." Qianyang said.

Xie Yan came into the house and carefully moved her cell phone and flashlight around the room.

There was nothing left in the room, including the ceiling chandelier wiring, light controls, and sockets, all of which had been removed.

Nothing was left behind...

【Wow, what can we find here? 】

[It is said that Shi Xiaonan committed suicide in her bedroom.]

【Could it be because of the rumors of hauntings that they burned all her things?】

[She was so scared that when she turned around, something would suddenly appear in the corner.]

"Wait a moment."

When the camera passed by a wall, Qianyang suddenly called her.

Xie Yan paused, and the camera stopped at the empty wall.

However, in the upper left corner of this area, there is a hole that is obviously different from other places.

[Hmm? It looks like that's where the air conditioning ducts pass.]

Any questions?

Some question marks appeared on the barrage.

Qian Yang said seriously, "Find a way to go up and take a look."

Xie Yan said, "Okay."

Xie Yan turned and left the room, found a small wooden table elsewhere, and dragged it into Shi Xiaonan's bedroom with difficulty.

She climbed onto the table, just enough to reach the entrance and exit of the air conditioning duct.

Qian Yang said, "Try to see if you can get your hand in."

【???】

[Impossible? How could an adult's hand possibly reach in there?]

Xie Yan didn't say anything. She lifted up her sleeves, revealing her skinny wrists, and actually put her hand in!

[What the hell?!]

[Sister Xie Yan is too thin...]

How can an adult be so thin?

[The crew of "Reenactment" should get out and be scolded.]

【Oh my god...I feel so bad.】

Xie Yan seemed to have touched something and paused.

Then she slowly withdrew her hand.

At this time, she had a rolled-up piece of paper in her hand.

Oh my god!

【There's actually something in here?! 】

[Is the anchor so awesome? ? ]

[Wait… How did Shi Xiaonan manage to fit something into such a small space like the air conditioning duct?]

[Holy crap?! She was already as thin as Xie Yan before she died?]

Xie Yan reached her hand into the pipe again, making sure there was nothing else inside before climbing down from the table.

She placed a thick stack of papers on the table, unfolded it forcefully, and discovered the words "Letter" written on the cover.

"'The Letter' was the last book she wrote before her death, and it was also the one that was discovered to have plagiarized." Xie Yan said as she turned to the first page.

The inside pages were filled with handwriting, but above the black handwriting, the words "rejected" were densely written in bright red.

"These are all Shi Xiaonan's handwriting."

Qianyang noticed the signature in the upper right corner and asked, "Her pen name is 'Mercury'?"

Hearing this, Xie Yan was visibly stunned. She rubbed the word "Mercury" with her fingertips and murmured, "No... She doesn't have a pen name."

[Oh shit…]

Did she write "The Letter"? Did she plagiarize it?

[Huh?? She submitted an article under the pseudonym "Mercury" and it was rejected?]

[…Why? With her fame at the time, there was no need for her to change her pen name, right?]

【Why do I feel something is wrong the more I think about it? 】

[She was so short of money during her lifetime, so for whatever reason, she shouldn't have changed her pen name and submitted her work?]

After her manuscript was rejected, she published the book under her own name...

Xie Yan flipped open the remaining pages, roughly read through all the contents, and said, "...This article is not the final published content of "Letter", and it does not contain the plots that were accused of plagiarism."

Qianyang raised a brow, "Really? This is the original version?"

Xie Yan said absentmindedly, "Except for the plot that was accused of plagiarism, the rest of the plot is exactly the same as the final published "Letter."

Gradually, Xie Yan became confused.

"I thought...she wasn't the one who plagiarized."

"Is this... the truth?"

[Alas, this is the truth. The plagiarist is Shi Xiaonan.]

[Perhaps she became a vengeful spirit and lingered in the world simply because she was unwilling to be discovered.]

[Emm, I don’t like people like this.]

[She stole the words that others had painstakingly created and made them her own. What's the difference between her and a thief?]

[Forget it, just understand the truth. No matter what she went through that caused her writing style to change drastically, she deserves it for plagiarizing.]

[But... the crime isn't punishable by death, right?]

"We are not here just for the truth. The person who plagiarized may be Shi Xiaonan herself, but this does not seem to be the crux of the matter in her mind." Qian Yang reminded.

"Or, are you going to stop here?"

Xie Yan placed her fingers on the paper covered with words and remained silent for a long time after listening to Qian Yang's words.

"No……"

After a while, she shook her head and said, "I still want to find the reason."

"She didn't need to change her pen name and send it to the publisher. Even if the original version of 'Letter' was published under her name, it would definitely be liked by readers."

"But she didn't do that. Perhaps... because she wasn't confident in her work. After it was rejected by the publisher, she would revise and embellish it and send it back to the publisher under her own name."

Qian Yang pondered for a moment and asked, "You said before that Shi Xiaonan has a good relationship with her sister at home?"

Xie Yan said, "Well, Shi Xiaonan's parents cared for and nurtured her younger brother more than they did her two sisters. After Shi Xiaonan entered society, all the money she sent home went towards her younger sister's tuition and living expenses."

"Her sister has good grades?"

Xie Yan said: "Yes, my sister is a liberal arts student..."

At this point, Xie Yan's voice paused.

As if changing her tone, she added, "The composition is particularly outstanding."

[Holy crap?]

[No way???]

Oh my god...

【I have a bold idea! 】

[At that time...could it be that the younger sister, who was in school, asked her older sister to publish her work on her behalf?]

Ahhhhhhhhhhhhh!

Qianyang's eyes moved slightly, as if he noticed the fluctuations in her body, and said, "Go back to the living room."

Xie Yan obeyed her and came to the living room.

There was nothing in the room, even the only door left was the main security door.

At this moment, the door was open inward, with the door leaves touching the side wall.

"Close the door." Qianyang said.

Xie Yan walked forward and closed the door, revealing a wall with nothing on it.

"The second-to-last tile on the skirting should be removable."

Xie Yan half-knelt down, put the flashlight on the ground, and tried to pull out the tile. Sure enough, she felt a looseness.

She removed the tiles with almost no effort. Under the flashlight, everyone could clearly see that there was no wall behind the tiles, but a faint silver light was flashing.

Xie Yan reached in and after a few seconds, she pulled out a dusty silver box.

After Shi Xiaonan passed away, no one would close the only door after entering this ominous house.

So seventeen years have passed, and no one has discovered the secret hidden behind this door.

Open this door and walk into the house without anyone noticing.

Close this door and leave the house without anyone noticing.

Everything seems to be destined.

Qian Yang said: "There is nothing else here, go back and open it."

"……good."

Xie Yan left the room carrying the silver box and the manuscript of "The Letter" and closed the door.

As we headed towards the safety passage, the flashlight dimly shone through the glass window, revealing a human skeleton sitting on the ground.

They came from different directions before, so they can’t be seen in the camera. This is the first look.

But it should be a skeleton model. Xie Yan walked straight past it without even glancing at it.

In this environment, it is quite scary to suddenly see a human skeleton.

[Sister Xie Yan is really brave.]

[I'm already terrified.]

【I'm curious about what's in the box. 】

[I have a feeling the truth will soon be revealed!]

[Where is the truth? Isn't it just Shi Xiaonan plagiarizing?]

【Clicked. Clicked.】

When Xie Yan passed by the stray cat skeleton on the fifth floor, she picked up an old piece of clothing on the ground and covered it with it.

Afterwards, she left Shi Xiaonan's former residence and returned home.

Finally, she opened the box that Shi Xiaonan had hidden before his death, and found two notebooks inside.

Xie Yan picked up the first book and opened the first page.

[xx year xx month sunny]

I moved out on my own and made my favorite lion's head dish tonight. It tasted just as I imagined. I used to share it with my sister, but this was the first time I ate a whole one by myself.

I hope my sister can eat a whole lion's head even after I leave home.

【xx year xx month cloudy】

【I bought a notebook and wanted to write a novel. 】

[xx year xx month sunny]

I got my salary and sent some home. I also secretly sent some to my sister as pocket money.

I told my sister about my idea, and she thought it was too heavy... But I still like it.

…

[xx year xx month sunny]

[I'm so happy that my first work can finally be published! ]

【xx year xx month rain】

[It didn't sell well, but I ran into two students discussing it in the store, and they seemed to love it!]

【xx year xx month rain】

My sister won a prize for her composition! She's amazing.

…

If only I could make some money.

Why do my parents only buy new clothes for my younger brother? My younger sister's clothes have been worn for a long time.

I've saved some money and am bringing my sister over this weekend. I'm going to take her clothes shopping!

I also bought a set for my younger brother. I hope he likes it.

My parents don't like me writing novels. Why?

I wish I could make some money.

…

The notebook is filled with Shi Xiaonan's diary.

After she moved out of her home, she went out alone and started recording.

Qian Yang and the audience in the live broadcast room followed Xie Yan as they read page by page, as if they could peek through the diary into Shi Xiaonan's true appearance more than 20 years ago.

【xx year xx month cloudy】

My younger sister wanted some pocket money, so she sent me her novel and asked me to contribute it to her.

She was afraid of being discovered by her parents and wanted to use my name.

At this point in the diary, the first change occurred.

[Oh my god…]

[Isn't this the time when she suddenly changes her style? ]

[The mid- to late-period works were definitely not written by her! ]

Oh my god!

[xx year xx month sunny]

My sister's book is a huge hit...

[xx year xx month sunny]

【It’s over, my parents found out.】

【xx year xx month rain】

[Why...my sister does everything better than me?]

…

The money is in my parents' hands.

What should I do? They won't let me publish my novel.

My sister's second book also sold out.

【Why……】

"Why? This is my only hobby. Are you going to deprive me of my only thing?"

Those cold and calm words recorded Shi Xiaonan's previous life.

Things got out of control as she published her first book in place of her sister.

Her parents no longer allowed her to publish works under her own name.

Her name became her sister's sustenance, and after that, all the works published by "Shi Xiaonan" were from her sister.

Shi Xiaonan tried to submit manuscripts to publishing houses under other pen names, but without exception, she was treated very differently from her sister. Most of her manuscripts were returned, and even if they were published by chance, the sales were very dismal.

After being discovered by her parents, Shi Xiaonan was deprived of the right to publish her works because she was worried that the matter might be exposed and affect her sister behind the scenes.

Her name had already been established, and her parents were reluctant to give it up, so they continued to publish her sister's works under her name.

According to the diary, she was no longer even allowed to go out to work.

Because a famous novelist doesn't have time to work at the bottom.

By the time she saw the end, Xie Yan could no longer control her trembling.

During the most difficult times, Shi Xiaonan relied on writing to get through it.

Even though she could only create in her spare time at work every day, and even though the results were very dismal, she still found joy in suffering. It is no exaggeration to say that in her oppressed life, creation was the only thing she could choose for herself.

Yet in the end, the only thing in her life that she had in her own hands was taken away from her.

Oh my god…

This is too much.

[This diary makes me feel suffocated and hopeless.]

Tears welled up in my eyes as I watched. Shi Xiaonan's life has been so miserable.

I felt like I was watching a resilient young girl go from being full of hope for the future to being left with only deep despair and powerlessness in the end.

[She can't do anything under her parents' control. How is this different from imprisonment?]

So... why was she so miserable in the end? Her parents didn't allow her to create, she couldn't earn money, couldn't pay the rent, and had to work part-time under a fake identity and submit works under other pseudonyms, but they all failed.

…

When she was desperate and so thin she could put her hand through the air conditioning duct, she sent the revised "Letter" to the publishing house under her own name. Was it because she felt inferior to her sister and worried that her work would not be popular with the public, so...?

[Being sued was just the final straw.]

【Ahhhhh! How shameless!】

[Shi Xiaonan's parents are so mean! ]

[No wonder they wanted to emigrate, no wonder Shi Xiaonan became a vengeful spirit. If this happened to me, I would definitely kill them!]

[Wuwuwu, help! It hurts so much to watch this...]

Why didn't she tell the truth when she was sued? Surely everyone would understand her, right?

Why pay the price in such an extreme way?

After learning the truth, everyone in the barrage was very emotional.

All the so-called truths cannot compare to this diary written by Shi Xiaonan, which can touch people's hearts more directly.

No one expected that the release of the movie "Reenactment" would lead to a secret from twenty years ago.

After the diary was made public in the live broadcast room, it was immediately reposted by tens of thousands of people.

In just a few minutes, the entry #施小楠缔Diary# topped the trending search list on Weibo.

"Ahhhhh, I'm stupid!"

"Everyone, watch the live broadcast! There's a twist to Shi Xiaonan's suicide seventeen years ago!"

"After reading the diary, I cried so hard that I was numb."

"The people who caused all this tragedy are Shi Xiaonan's parents!"

"I'm crazy... No wonder she had such a miserable life!"

"Wow, wow, I have a bold guess. After being prosecuted, she didn't leave a suicide note. Was it because she didn't want to burden her sister?"

"Oh my god... Thinking back to what Sister Xie Yan said during the live broadcast yesterday, it's getting more and more terrifying."

…

The number of viewers in the live broadcast room soared to 20 million.

Perhaps because of yesterday's lesson, the Qingning platform strengthened its server and no lag occurred.

After reading the contents of the two diaries, the last one stopped at her lifelong wish.

She wanted something that was completely her own.

It doesn't need to be controlled or influenced by others, it belongs entirely to her.

The barrage of comments in the live broadcast room refreshed at such a fast speed that it was hard to catch up. No one thought that behind the story, everything Shi Xiaonan experienced was so heartbreaking.

Now when I think back on the days before and after her death, it is heartbreaking.

What kind of mood was she in when she committed suicide without leaving a single word?

She left behind a blank suicide note that anyone could have composed, ending her painful life.

If this is the truth, what can be done to resolve the resentment in her heart?

Would her parents be brought to court and sentenced to death?

"But..." Qianyang looked at the woman crying with her hands covering her face on the screen and said hesitantly, "This is not the reason why she stayed in the human world."

Xie Yan's body visibly paused for a moment, and she looked up in disbelief. Tears as big as beans flowed out of her eyes and dripped down her pale chin.

"...What?" Xie Yan's voice was so soft that it was almost inaudible.

Qian Yang frowned and said, "These are not the reasons why she became a vengeful spirit."

"Why..." Xie Yan murmured.

【no? 】

[Isn't her resentment directed at her parents and sister? ]

[Has she experienced anything more desperate than this? ? ]

[They're not my parents? Such son-centric, money-obsessed parents should just die.]

Qianyang pondered for a moment, thinking back to what he had seen and heard in the past two days. This was almost all they could know about Shi Xiaonan.

Her resentment wasn't because of what was in the diary, so what was it because of?

The date when the diary finally stops, she hopes to get something that belongs only to her, but does she finally achieve it?

If so, what would it be?

...Is it related to Zheng Qi’s frequent nightmares?

Qianyang thought back to everything he had learned in the past two days, and suddenly, an idea came to his mind.

Why did Xie Yan not react at all when she saw the human skeleton in that environment, but covered the remains of the dead stray cat with clothes when she went downstairs?

Shi Xiaonan's ghost has been attached to her for two years, and she has immersed herself in digging out everything about Shi Xiaonan. Shi Xiaonan's habits during his lifetime have already subconsciously influenced her.

"Did Shi Xiaonan have a pet during his lifetime?" Qian Yang asked.

Hearing this, Xie Yan's pupils suddenly shrank.

"Cat? Or dog?"

Xie Yan's pupils gradually lost focus as she murmured, "...I found a stray dog."

"It, it is... the only one..."

She suddenly looked at the screen and asked, "Where is it..."

"It's sick."

"I..." Xie Yan suddenly changed her address, "...I'm treating it."

"But... I don't have any money..."

"I, I want to make some money... I'm going to... work part-time..."

[…Xiao Nan?]

[I'm going crazy! Is this Shi Xiaonan speaking?]

So, why did she work part-time here and there, and why did she submit to "Letter" under other pseudonyms? Why did she disobey her parents and publish the final version of "Letter" under her own name?

【She just wanted to treat the puppy? 】

【ah? ? ? ? 】

[No…]

"I'd rather you do it for yourself, for survival. How could you do it just to treat a sick puppy..."

Xie Yan looked at the camera in confusion, tears rolling down her face, her pale lips trembling.

"One day...it disappeared."

【Author’s words】

Success on the 8th day, thanks for your support, muah [kiss]