Letting go

Wei Shao grabbed his wrist and said word by word: "Yes, but not now - now I need you to tell me, what's wrong with your hand?"

Philo suddenly struggled hard, and his bandaged hand hit the door frame because of his reckless movement. More blood gushed out and dripped from the end, leaving bloodstains on the ground.

Wei Shao felt a cold sweat on his back and immediately let go: "Stop! I'll let go! Luo Luo——"

"Bang!"

Fei Luo didn't listen to what Wei Shao said next and pushed the door shut with force.

The door panel covered with blood stains locked Wei Shao out and also concealed Philo's ugly appearance at this time.

He suddenly ripped off the bandage on his hand like crazy. The last piece of bright red bandage was torn off, revealing the bloody hand inside. The fingernails had been roughly dug out by a sharp object, leaving only a bloody nail bed.

However, when this hand turns into an insect, the insect armor will still grow at an incredible speed, just like his blood and fate that he cannot escape.

…

Fei Luo's condition today was very strange. Wei Shao outside the door was extremely anxious. He called the system many times, but all his calls fell on deaf ears.

The system disappeared.

Wei Shao felt even more uneasy. He was worried, but he didn't dare to break in by force, so he could only wait.

Halfway through, he thought that Philo was hungry and wanted to come out to eat, so he ran into the kitchen and clumsily cooked a pot of porridge.

Then he sat on the floor at the door and knocked on the door frame every ten minutes, but there was no response from inside. Wei Shao's frown never relaxed for a moment.

He could more or less guess that Philo's attitude today had something to do with him.

After spending so much time together, he already knew Philo's character very well. If it was something else bad, Philo would definitely take the initiative to tell him.

Only about him... I can't speak of it, but I can't let it go.

In fact, Wei Shao has thought a lot these days, from assuming that Philo's feelings for him are true, to analyzing how long this love can last and how deep it is.

If he leaves, will Philo be able to forget this experience that should not have happened as time goes by, will he be able to live a stable life, and will he be able to obtain the happiness he should have?

What should he do if, like last time, Philo can't let go, can't forget, and gambles his life on his survival? Leave?

...In what capacity?

These questions became a tangled mess in Wei Shao's mind, impossible to sort out or resolve.

He sat on the ground, leaning against the wall, thinking about random things, and gradually fell into a light sleep.

I don't know how much time had passed, but the sound of a door opening suddenly woke him up. The living room, bathroom and corridor were all dark.

Philo stood in the half-open doorway, facing the light, staring at Wei Shao who was sitting on the ground at the doorway.

Wei Shao also looked up at him.

I don’t know if it was Wei Shao’s illusion, but there seemed to be deep pain and sadness in Philo’s eyes.

Philo slowly squatted down in front of him, his eyes never leaving him. He also looked at Philo nervously, full of doubts and worries, but before he could ask, he heard the other party whispered to him: "Aren't you tired?"

Wei Shao thought that Fei Luo was talking about the fact that he had been sitting here waiting for an entire afternoon, so he shook his head and said, "It's OK. I was just worried that something might happen to you. I was relieved to see you come out."

Philo did not stop there. He changed to a more pointed and direct question: "Wei Shao, you and I have no relationship at all. You have taken care of me for so many years. Isn't that enough? Is it worth it to continue to waste time?"

No relatives or friends...

The corners of Wei Shao's lips, which had just relaxed, gradually drooped again, and his tone was not very good: "Whether it is worth it or not is up to me to decide, what do you want to say by asking this?"

Philo stared at a stain on the door frame and said, "Go back."

Wei Shao's head buzzed. He stared at Fei Luo blankly, his eyes swept across that almost indifferent profile, and asked: "...Where are you going?"

Philo's hand hanging by his side tightened little by little in the severe pain, and the thick black blood flowed again, but his voice was flat:

"Go back to where you belong and don't come here again."

Wei Shao simply didn't believe that Philo's attitude would change so much in just a few days. He thought about it over and over again, and although it was incredible, he only came up with one possibility -

Philo was forcing him to accept it in this way. As long as he couldn't let Philo go his own way, he would have to take another path.

Wei Shao's reason told him that he should just follow Fei Luo's words and say "Okay, then I'll go back" to completely put an end to Fei Luo's thoughts. However, his throat seemed to be blocked by something and he couldn't utter a single harsh word.

He lowered his eyelashes, and the weak light cast a sparse shadow under his eyes. He did not raise his head to look at Philo: "I cooked porridge, go and have some."

Philo's breathing gradually became disordered, his chest rose and fell, but he didn't move.

Wei Shao stood up and pushed his shoulder: "I won't ask if you don't want to talk about it, but you still have to eat - be obedient, okay?"

Philo didn't struggle anymore and let him push him into the kitchen without saying a word.

As soon as he entered the door, a strange porridge smell assaulted his sense of smell. Wei Shao's face changed and he rushed to the porridge pot. As soon as he stretched out his hand, he was burned by the scalding heat.

He stopped the injured insect warrior Philo who tried to take over, and opened the lid with a dry towel.

Fortunately, only the bottom of the pot was burnt.

Wei Shao breathed a sigh of relief, took a large bowl to scoop up the thick porridge on the top that was not affected, and then fished out all the meat pieces inside.

The water was boiled dry, but the grains were blooming and the meat was scattered. It actually looked quite presentable. Wei Shao put a spoon on it, brought it to the dining table, and waved to Filo who was standing blankly at the kitchen door: "Come here."

Philo came over slowly.

Wei Shao wanted to hand him the spoon, but when he saw his gauze-wrapped hand, he hesitated.

It was obvious that Philo's hands were not capable of holding cutlery.

What should I do then? ...I can't let him feed me, can I?

Although he had fed her before, things were different now. The originally ordinary action seemed to have become ambiguous.

Philo had no intention of making things difficult for him. He simply stretched out his hands, which were wrapped so tightly that they could not be seen in their original form. He held the spoon with difficulty between his fingertips and palms, and scooped a spoonful of porridge into his mouth.

I paused after the first bite.

Wei Shao was stunned: "Not delicious?"

He specially made it salty and fresh according to Philo's usual taste.

Philo shook his head and continued eating.

Wei Shao had a feeling something was wrong, so he ran to the kitchen, got another spoon, took a sip, and almost spit it out.

"Stop eating!" He immediately reached out to take the spoon from Philo's hand, "It's so fishy - I'll take you out to eat."

Philo dodged sideways: "I'm not picky."

Wei Shao frowned: "..."

He suddenly remembered something that happened when he was very young.

His mother also loved sweet food, so she would often ask a famous female pastry chef to come to their house to make desserts. That sister was very gentle. Wei Shao liked to move a small stool and sit next to her while she was making desserts, watching her spread thick cream evenly on the crepe skin.

Later, for some reason, the sister never came again, and his mother was often depressed and staring out the window. In order to cheer her up, he ran into the dessert room, made a small cake like the sister, and excitedly brought it to her.

At that moment her expression became very ugly, but she still scooped a mouthful with a spoon and put it in her mouth to chew, then spit it on the ground in front of Wei Shao, and said with a gloomy face, "It's unpalatable and disgusting, don't do it again in the future."

Wei Shao raised his eyes and saw that Fei Luo was still struggling to put the porridge into his mouth. He took a deep breath and said, "Don't eat it. Let me pour it out."

Philo remained silent and did not let go. The bandage on his hand began to bleed again. He lowered his head, and at that moment a transparent object fell into the bowl.

In the suffocating silence, Wei Shao took the spoon from his hand, but did not pour it out as he had said before.

"Open your mouth."

Philo did not move.

Wei Shao held up the spoon and threatened in a low voice: "If you don't open your mouth, I will pour it out."

These words seemed to have pressed a switch, and Philo immediately lowered his head and held the spoon in his mouth.

Wei Shao fed him silently and Fei Luo ate quietly. The bowl of porridge was slowly half empty. The bottom of the bowl in Wei Shao's palm was cold. The porridge, which was already hard to eat, probably tasted even fishier.

He paused, and under Philo's inquiring gaze, he raised his head and drank the rest in one go.

Wei Shao swallowed the cold and fishy porridge in his mouth, resisting the nausea, and then gulped down a large glass of water. Finally, he commented: "It's too salty. It's all your fault."

Philo realized the implication in his words, pursed his lips and did not respond, but asked: "When are you leaving?"

Wei Shao felt a bit of a headache - was it necessary to talk about this matter right away?

He answered evasively: "Wait until you can reassure me."

Philo was silent for a while before nodding: "Okay."

-

The system did not appear afterwards.

Wei Shao initially thought that Fei Luo asked him to leave just out of anger, in order to force him to accept the relationship that went beyond the line.

But in the days that followed, even though he stayed here, Philo treated him very distantly, not even as close to him as Luke and the others.

Philo worked harder on his missions than before and was rarely injured anymore. He still called Wei Shao "brother" and no longer went beyond the rules by calling him by his full name. However, he no longer pestered him like before, nor did he cry in front of him.

Wei Shao suddenly realized that Fei Luo might really want him to leave in peace, rather than just saying it in anger.

Why……?

Wei Shao was still confused, and Fei Luo came to him again.

There was a knock on the door. There was only a wall between them, but when Wei Shao looked at Fei Luo at the door, he felt as if he was in another world.

Philo did not go in, but just stood there and asked again: "When are you going back?"

Wei Shao suddenly realized that he was angry.

Why.

Why should he come when you want him to, and leave when you want him to leave?

Philo seemed to read the emotion in his eyes and suddenly said, "I will never force you to come back in that way again."

Wei Shao was like a punctured balloon, all his anger was released in an instant.

He rubbed his brow bone wearily, then asked, "Why?"

Philo's face was hidden in the shadows. He thought, because I'm afraid that if you don't leave, I will be unable to help but use more and more unscrupulous means to keep you and trap you.

But what he said was: “No reason.”

That's a really bad answer. Wei Shao probably spoke without thinking, or maybe he just expressed what was in his heart: "...Didn't you say you liked me?"

Wei Shao didn't know what answer he wanted to get by asking this ridiculous question. Perhaps he hoped to hear Philo say in person that he had simply misjudged family affection for something else, and then they could put aside their past grudges and continue to be brothers in the remaining time.

Or maybe something else.

Philo lowered his eyes and said, "Not in the future."

Yes now, but not in the future.

He didn't say how long this would happen, and Wei Shao didn't expect that it would happen the next day after their conversation.

Before Philo left, he said he would not be back today.

Wei Shao had decided yesterday to restrain himself from asking him more questions, but when he heard this, he couldn't help but frowned: "Where do you live?"

"Male insect recruitment center."