Chapter 79 If you must destroy me, let us perish together. ...

As night fell, the mountains and forests grew cold.

The blood clotted in the hot water, sealed in the aroma of the herbs. Qiao Yan huddled deep in the bathtub, her long hair loose, floating on the water. The soft light illuminated her naked, pale skin, like a snowflake falling in June.

After mastering the sword technique, her arms and waist were stronger than ever before. This training was a rebirth after countless trials and tribulations; having undergone this training, she could wield a sword without spiritual power and could easily take the life of a Qi Refining stage cultivator. As compensation, other parts of her body became thinner, the outline of her bones clearly visible, and her skin lost much of its color.

The water could no longer harm her; conversely, she had also lost the right to drown in it. The crisscrossing wounds on her body hadn't been treated, or perhaps she had intentionally left them, staining the water murky, a layer of faint red floating on it. Through this layer of red and rising steam, Qiao Yanshen saw Luo Yang's face; the smooth water surface made the woman's gentle features appear even more flawless.

Her body trembled slightly, ripples spread outwards, her face distorted, then returned to its original form, revealing a pair of cold, indifferent eyes.

Qiao Yanshen rose from the water. Her body bore many marks left by sword energy. When her spiritual power was sealed, her mortal body was powerless to heal them. The mermaid's blood could only save her life, but it could not cure her hidden ailments.

She dried herself off, cast another cleansing spell, resisted the urge to wash again, and put her clothes back on.

Having been immersed in the stench of blood for so long, even after bathing, she still felt the pungent smell lingering on her body, wanting to wash herself again and again. If this continued, it would surely never end.

Yan Xueya was still waiting for her inside. As her teacher, she rushed over as soon as she learned that the two had returned to the sect, and she also brought Ruan Luoying with her.

Upon entering the hall, the three were discussing Shen Yuanzhong's experiences. As soon as Qiao Yanshen sat down, they stopped talking and all their eyes fell on her, creating a silent atmosphere.

“Stretch out your hand,” Ruan Luoying finally spoke, “the spiritual energy within your body is very chaotic.”

Qiao Yanshen reached out, and Ruan Luoying leaned closer to take her pulse and regulate her breathing with her spiritual energy. After a while, she breathed a sigh of relief and said gently, "It's alright."

She took out a small, clean white bottle and placed it on the table, instructing Qiao Yanshen to remember to apply it. Yan Xueya listened silently to the sound, her gaze sweeping over the scars on the wrist of the person in front of her, gaining some understanding of what Shen Lixia had deliberately omitted earlier.

"Xueya, let's go." Ruan Luoying turned to Yan Xueya and said.

Girls should be given some space.

The other person nodded, stood up from the chair, and said softly to the two of them, "Take a good rest, and put everything else aside for now."

After saying that, they left. The sound of the door closing was soft yet sharp, breaking the silence. Shen Lixia picked up the medicine bottle and whispered, "Senior Sister, let me help you."

Qiao Yanshen shook his head and reached out to take the medicine bottle. "I can do it myself."

“People don’t have eyes on their backs,” Shen Lixia refused to give it to her, guarding the small bottle behind her back. “If you’re not careful, the wound will reopen and it will hurt.”

She didn't want Qiao Yanshen to suffer any more pain. Qiao Yanshen said again that he didn't need it, but Shen Lixia still didn't agree. The two remained silent for a long time, and even when the cicadas started chirping, they couldn't suppress this sudden, stubborn energy.

"Shen Lixia." Qiao Yanshen sighed softly, then felt that it was too much to be angry over such a small matter. Shen Yuan had just returned, and she hadn't sorted out her emotions yet; any further entanglement would only make her feel tired. This time, her voice wasn't as cold as before—in fact, she had never been cold to the person in front of her.

So she added, "The scar is ugly, I don't want you to see it."

I had just seen it in the water; the unhealed areas had cracked open again, and fresh blood was seeping from the old, necrotic parts—a shocking sight.

“It’s not ugly,” Shen Lixia put the medicine bottle on the table, took Qiao Yanshen’s hand, and pressed it against her chest. “I’m not lying to you, I don’t think it’s ugly.”

The pounding of her heart came from her palm, the soft warmth startlingly hot. This touch was like water rushing towards Qiao Yanshen; what could she do? Yet Shen Lixia lowered her eyes, her usual flamboyance transforming into a submissive demeanor reserved only for her, and softly said, "Let me help Senior Sister, okay?"

She pursed her lips, and finally nodded. Shen Lixia smiled, took the medicine bottle, and waited for her to turn around before taking off her clothes.

The boy's fingertips touched his back and waist, each touch of the cool ointment bringing a torment of both ice and fire. Wherever it touched, the snow melted, leaving warm water that meandered into his heart. Even the wounds no longer hurt sharply; instead, they felt as if covered by a soft membrane, the pain perceived through a tingling numbness. Fire ignited.

She shouldn't have agreed, she shouldn't have agreed. Qiao Yanshen lowered her head in frustration, trying to cover her burning skin with her long hair. Her ears and cheeks were burning hot, and her whole body felt like it was being roasted by fire. She felt Shen Lixia's fingers pause slightly, pressing on the edge of a wound, and she realized that it was all just an attempt to cover it up. The faint blush had already uncontrollably seeped into his sight, surging in like a gentle tide. She had nowhere to escape.

Warmth lingers from the waist to the shoulders and then to the arms.

Time ticked by, and Qiao Yanshen was tormented and restless. Shen Lixia noticed her trembling and applied the medicine with gentler force, which made Qiao Yanshen cry out weakly in her heart: Hurry up, let it end soon.

"alright."

Shen Lixia withdrew her hand. She truly hadn't said anything about how unsightly it looked, and calmly finished applying the medicine. Qiao Yanshen pulled her clothes together, unsure what to say. She thought Shen Lixia probably didn't care, unaware of the intense thoughts she had just gone through. Just as she thought this, she heard the young man get up from his chair and walk towards the door.

"I'm going to wash up. If you're sleepy, Senior Sister, you can go to sleep first."

A quiet sense of loss settled down with her heart, which had fallen back into her chest. The intense, throbbing feeling that had been stuck in her throat was gone. The moonlight fell as usual, and the epiphyllum bloomed with all its might—a poignant display of affection, but the flowing water remained indifferent.

But if she really meant it, why was she so hesitant and afraid to speak up? Qiao Yanshen pulled open her inner garment slightly again, her fingertips landing on the spot where the boy had just touched. It was as if their warmth had crossed time to connect, and she took a step back to embrace his gentle caress.

Why you of all people, Li Xia?

In that case, wouldn't the past seem even more like a curse?

Outside, Shen Lixia leaned against the door, raising her hand to cover her face. The heat between her fingers burned; fireflies flitted past, but she dared not look. She dared not look at anything.

A shocking sword wound ripped across Qiao Yanshen's back, slicing through her delicate features, resembling unevenly melting snow in early spring. Its almost cruel beauty moved her heart, soaking and tearing at her soul with the seeping drops of blood.

Blood was flowing everywhere, even between her fingers, though it was colorless. A wave of intense shame and pain washed over Shen Lixia, overwhelming her irresistibly.

She crossed the line. Confident that Qiao Yanshen wouldn't refuse her, she slowly approached the edge. He was already sensitive to physical contact, and had just been so embarrassed, his face flushed red to his ears, looking so awkward and disheveled, yet he didn't tell her to stop.

The wound lay naked before my eyes, and what she thought was further harm. How could she be so wicked, so vile?

Shen Lixia took a deep breath and wiped away the tears streaming down her face. Fortunately, she had managed to hold back her tears just now, and now that she wasn't looking at her injuries, she didn't feel like crying anymore.

Qiao Yanshen didn't tell her, but that didn't stop her from already knowing. They didn't share the same spiritual connection, but Shen Lixia understood. She raised her hand and placed it on her shoulder, slowly tracing it towards her heart, her nails digging deep, wanting to scratch, to cut open, until the pain of being pierced through was vivid again and again, etched into her bones and blood.

In this way, she might be able to sense Qiao Yanshen's feelings and be allowed to remain in her silence, instead of being repeatedly pushed away.

A quiet evening breeze blew by. Shen Lixia lowered her hand and walked to the water vat. As she drew water, she remembered that this was something that could actually be solved with a simple cleansing spell; saying this was just a habitual excuse.

After washing up, Shen Lixia had made up her mind that no matter what, she had to get a little closer to Qiao Yanshen. Ideally, she wanted to give her a gentle hug and tell her she wouldn't leave.

When she pushed open the door, the hall was empty. She tiptoed into the inner room and saw that Qiao Yanshen was already asleep. A seat had been left for her beside him; unlike before, they weren't back to back. This time, Qiao Yanshen was sleeping facing her, the moonlight illuminating his serene face.

Her breathing was steady; she was already asleep. Shen Lixia slowly walked to the side, changed her clothes, and carefully leaned down, resting her head on the edge of the bed. She felt a surge of emotion welling up inside her—a tenderness more delicate than moonlight.

She didn't sleep well. Shen Lixia got into bed and saw that Qiao Yanshen's hand, which was pressed against her lips, was trembling. She lowered her eyes and took his hand in hers.

Her fingers curled up and then opened, as if trying to grasp something. Shen Lixia remained silent for a long time, then secretly glanced at Qiao Yanshen, and only after confirming that she wouldn't wake up did she shrink back into the blankets, letting her soft hair brush against Qiao Yanshen's palm.

Since we won't be discovered, let's be a little greedy for a moment.

Suddenly, her palm touched something warm and rough, and Qiao Yanshen seemed to calm down considerably. The young man gently pressed her wrist down, rubbing it repeatedly. Finally, satisfied, Shen Lixia closed her eyes and whispered:

"good evening."

The next morning, when Qiao Yanshen woke up, she saw Shen Lixia holding her hand. She gently pulled away, pondered for a moment, and then touched the corner of the boy's eye.

Some redness and swelling remained, along with a lingering warmth and moisture. Qiao Yanshen's fingertips paused, his palm resting on Shen Lixia's cheek. She pursed her lips, her eyes filled with tenderness, and sighed softly as if in resignation.

"Don't always cry for me."

But she actually liked Shen Lixia, who would shed tears for her.

After hesitating for a long time, he finally leaned down slightly and placed a kiss on the boy's forehead. Qiao Yanshen slowly moved himself off the bed and tucked the blanket around Shen Lixia.

It was just getting light outside; it must have been around dawn.

She changed her clothes, left a note on the table, and then left.

After a soft sound, the room fell silent again.

On the other side of Frostblade Peak, not long after, someone arrived through the snow, his body radiating spiritual energy, clearly indicating that he had reached the pinnacle of cultivation and was about to break through to the next realm.

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Author's Note: Xia is like a little firebird who wants to burn herself and the other person to ashes in everything she does.