Chapter 3-3

3

Since coming to the United States to study after graduating from high school, He Yajun has never spent Chinese New Year at home, unless there are special circumstances, such as the passing of his grandparents a few years ago, which forced him to squeeze in time to return and help with the funeral arrangements. Normally, he only returns to China once a year. Each time he comes back, he tries to stay a few more days to spend with his mother, visit his grandmother, and meet with some friends he gets along with. His work at the bank is extremely busy, a fact he never complains about, but no matter how much he loves his job, he occasionally longs to escape and enjoy some relaxation. Therefore, he cherishes his annual trip back to China.

This time, if it weren't for the fact that his father, after storming out of his mother's house, didn't stop but instead became even more insistent on him going to Zhu Yi's house to apologize, causing him endless trouble and annoyance, he would never have left early.

Only after boarding the plane to New York did he finally catch his breath, calm down, and couldn't help but smile bitterly. His father always thought his reluctance to try dating Zhu Yi was out of spite and rebellion. In fact, he wasn't just saying it out of anger; he genuinely had no feelings for Zhu Yi. He admitted that Zhu Yi was a good girl—from her education and experience to her appearance and even her family background, there was nothing to criticize. But seeing her, he couldn't feel a ripple in his heart. He had agreed to meet Zhu Yi only to appease his father and also to clarify his feelings to her face and dispel any lingering thoughts she might have about him. However, upon seeing her, he kept thinking of another face—a face with bright, beautiful eyes that seemed to speak volumes.

He was somewhat surprised by his own reaction. Logically speaking, he and Qiao Ruo had only just started dating, and even though they had slept together and he knew she had liked him for many years, she was still practically a stranger to him. It was impossible for him to develop such deep feelings for her in just a few days, let alone frequently think of her when facing another woman. After much thought, he could only explain it to himself like this: because her eyes were so beautiful, and when she looked at him, they were always full of restraint and affection, unlike any of his previous girlfriends, leaving him with a different impression. That's why, when he saw another woman's eyes, he subconsciously thought of her eyes and made a comparison.

After returning home from meeting Zhu Yi, he had barely stepped inside when He Qingyang called. Reluctantly, he answered and, as expected, received a long lecture and scolding. When He Qingyang finally tired of scolding him, he coldly replied, "Unfortunately, I didn't inherit your ability to marry every woman you meet, but I do have the ability to date and break up with every one I date. If you think Zhu Yi and her parents don't mind, then I don't mind dating her for a few days and then dumping her."

He Qingyang flew into a rage: "He Yajun, don't go too far! Don't forget I'm your father!"

He Yajun laughed, her tone surprisingly calm: "Don't worry, if I didn't still remember this, I would have blocked you long ago. Why would I answer this kind of call and invite being scolded?"

He hung up the phone without a word, turned it off, threw it heavily on the entryway cabinet, grabbed a bottle of ice-cold mineral water from the refrigerator, and gulped it down before he felt less agitated. After calming down a bit, he found his argument with his father laughable. Ever since he witnessed his father embracing a strange woman on the street in his first year of junior high, his image of his father had crumbled. Initially, he was indifferent to his father, ignoring him completely. Later, his father gradually began to interfere in his life, even trying to control his work and relationships. Their relationship became irreconcilable, neither willing to give in, and every phone call ended unpleasantly. He had thought that being on the other side of the world, halfway between him and his father, would allow him to escape that control. However, no matter how much he neglected his father, deliberately ignoring calls and texts, he couldn't completely sever ties. This bond of blood truly left him feeling helpless and powerless.

He went back to his room, turned on his computer, and started playing a shooting game. He fought in the virtual world for more than two hours before his frustration was completely gone.

Around five o'clock, Qin Hui returned home and went to his room to find him. She saw him wearing headphones, engrossed in controlling the keyboard and mouse. She patted him on the back in annoyance and said, "How old are you? Still playing games."

He took off his headphones, exited the game, and said with a smile, "Just getting nostalgic, trying to recapture the feeling of my youth."

"Nonsense, you're young, what's there to be nostalgic about? I haven't even started being nostalgic yet."

He stood up and put his arm around her shoulder: "You're still young. When I'm seventy or eighty, you'll still be this young."

She tapped his forehead with her index finger: "All you know is how to appease your mother."

"I'm telling the truth."

She smiled and shook her head, then suddenly asked, "What's wrong with your phone? I tried calling you this afternoon, but it was always off."

He then remembered the phone he had thrown away in a fit of anger. Not wanting to tell her about what had happened that day, he said in a light voice, "It's probably out of battery."

He walked to the entryway, picked up his phone from the cabinet, and turned it on. Qin Hui leaned against the cabinet and said, "I called your grandma this afternoon. She misses you a lot. We'll go to her place tomorrow morning to see her and then take her to the city hospital for a full physical exam. She's getting old, and she can't miss a checkup."

"good."

He Yajun couldn't help but smile whenever he thought of his maternal grandmother. He had been close to his maternal grandparents since childhood. During his elementary school years, he would be sent to live with his grandparents for at least half a month every winter and summer vacation. The two elderly people loved him dearly, but they didn't spoil or indulge him. Every time he finished his homework for the day, his grandparents would carefully check it for him. His grandfather, who was an elementary school teacher before he retired, was especially strict with his homework. Occasionally, when he was in a playful mood and didn't want to do his homework, he would be lazy and just do a few careless strokes. When his grandfather found out, he would often receive a stern scolding.

"Ya-jun, if you don't want to do your homework today, you can skip it for now and postpone it for a day or two. But since you've already spent time on it, you must take it seriously. Otherwise, you'll waste your time and learn nothing. This attitude will not only affect your studies, but if it becomes a habit, it will harm you in the future."

As he grew a little older, his grandfather began to teach him some principles of life: "Yajun, no matter what happens, never give up your love for life. Life is long. You will go to many places, meet many people, and do many things in the future. All of these are worth looking forward to. Sometimes sadness and sorrow are not bad things. On the contrary, they can teach us to grow better. Grandpa is getting old and will leave one day, but as long as Grandpa is still here, you can come to Grandpa anytime you encounter any unhappiness."

It wasn't until much later that he realized that his grandfather had known about his son-in-law's infidelity and noticed his unusual emotions, which was why he came to comfort him and give him strength.

He always thought that there was plenty of time, and that his grandfather would accompany him as he grew up, witnessing every important moment when he was admitted to high school, college, and entered the workforce. However, not long after he started junior high school, his grandfather unfortunately passed away due to a sudden heart attack. He was in class that day when his parents, who rushed to pick him up from school, told him the news, and he instantly collapsed.

His grandmother and mother, equally heartbroken, restrained their grief and kept comforting him, and he cried loudly in their arms.

Grandma hugged him and gently patted his head, saying, "Yajun, don't be too sad. No one can escape birth, aging, sickness, and death. Your grandpa's greatest wish is for you to always be happy."

After his tears, he finally accepted reality and secretly vowed to take good care of his grandmother. Over the years, no matter where he was, he would often contact his grandmother. As time went by, his grandmother's face became more and more wrinkled, and her back gradually became hunched. Fortunately, his grandmother's health indicators were good all these years, and she had a very good attitude. Although she lost her husband, she always lived optimistically. Whenever he saw his grandmother's smiling face, he felt particularly at ease.

The next morning, he drove his mother to his maternal grandmother's house in the countryside, bringing her new clothes and shoes. As usual, she accepted them with a smile, and then brought out two bowls of scallion oil noodles, placing them in front of him and his mother respectively.

She looked at her eldest daughter and grandson with a smile, her eyes full of kindness and love: "Our darlings are back."

He had already eaten breakfast before coming over and didn't feel hungry, but he still immediately picked up his bowl and ate it all up.

Grandma touched his face and said with a smile, "Our Ya Jun is still so handsome. His future baby will definitely be just as handsome."

He and his mother exchanged a glance. His mother smiled but did not say anything. He did not want to bring up the same old ideas about not getting married or having children with his elderly grandmother, so he could only nod in agreement: "You are right, he must be very handsome."

"Yajun, remember what your grandmother said: when judging a person, don't just look at their mouth, you must look at their eyes. The mouth can lie, but the eyes rarely lie. When you marry in the future, you must marry a girl with clean and pure eyes. Such girls are mostly kind-hearted and won't harm you."

He almost immediately thought of Qiao Ruo's eyes, and his heart skipped a beat, as if a gentle breeze had swept by, causing tiny ripples to spread across his face.

He once again tried to convince himself: because her eyes were different from other women's, and since she was now his girlfriend, it was only natural for him to think of her.

He accompanied his mother to take his grandmother to the city hospital where his uncle worked for a physical examination. Before they left, his grandmother prepared two baskets of eggs and asked him to take one basket to his uncle when they arrived at the hospital.

After taking her grandmother to her medical check-up, He Yajun took the eggs to the office of her uncle, Lou Xufeng, where he practiced medicine, and waited for him to finish his morning clinic session before giving them to him. He stood against the wall, idly looking around. The small screen opposite him displayed the name of the patient being treated, "Qiao Wei." This patient's surname reminded him of Qiao Ruo, and he couldn't help but chuckle, feeling somewhat speechless at how he had been thinking about her repeatedly these past two days.

Not long after, the door opened, and the person standing in front of him was the very person he was thinking of. He was taken aback. He saw a thin, middle-aged man following Qiao Ruo out. The two had many similarities in their faces, and he immediately guessed that this man was her father.

Qiao Ruo's surprise was even more obvious, and she even took the initiative to speak to him unexpectedly. However, before she could finish speaking, he noticed the regret in her eyes, so he had to quickly compose himself and try to answer her in a calm tone so as not to arouse her father's suspicion.

He stared at her retreating figure as she pulled her father away, not missing the somewhat uneasy look on her face when she emerged from behind the door. He guessed that her father's illness must be quite serious, so when he saw Lou Xufeng, he casually asked, "Uncle, I just ran into a high school classmate here. I think her father's name is Qiao Wei. What illness does he have?"

Lou Xufeng thought for a moment and said, "He has something growing in his stomach."

He was startled: "Are you alright?"

"It's hard to say exactly what it is right now, but judging from the shape, it's probably nothing serious. Surgery is definitely going to be done, and it's scheduled for next Saturday."

He paused for a moment, unsure whether he should ask his uncle to look after Qiao Ruo's father. Thinking of Qiao Ruo's worried expression just now, he decided to ask his uncle for help: "Uncle, I know you are always serious and responsible towards your patients, but... please pay more attention to his condition."

Lou Xufeng seemed unsurprised, patted him on the shoulder, and laughed, "Don't worry, I will."

After delivering the eggs, he took his grandmother home and chatted with her while watching TV. His grandmother, wanting to stay overnight at her daughter's house, missed the free-range chickens she raised at home. So he took her back to the countryside. When he returned home, he took out his phone and saw a WeChat message Qiao Ruo had sent him around noon: "Do you have time tonight? Let's go to a hotel."

He was surprised by her initiative, but then he realized that she was probably in a bad mood because of her father's illness, which was why she sent him such a message. At the same time, he had to admit that he did not dislike her invitation; on the contrary, it stirred up all sorts of unspeakable thoughts in him.

Subsequent meetings also took place in hotels. Perhaps because their rendezvous could only take place in hotels, this secretive way of getting along gave him a strange sense of excitement—it sounded like a couple having an affair, so he experienced a pleasure so intense that it terrified him each time. That powerful impact, with a kind of destructive force, swept over him mercilessly, invaded his consciousness, and made him completely lose control of himself.

He could pretend to be calm in front of her, but he couldn't deny to himself that she had given him a huge surprise in matters of the heart, and he wanted more.

The night he returned to New York, he dreamt of her. When he woke up in the middle of the night, looking at the empty side of the bed, he felt a void in his heart. Recalling the dream that had so disoriented him, he laughed self-deprecatingly, put his hands behind his head, and stared silently at the dark ceiling for a long time, his mind still unsettled. He sighed, reached for his phone on the bedside table, opened WeChat, and went through his chat with Qiao Ruo, reading through all their conversations from the day they added each other on WeChat until their most recent one. Only then did he regain a little peace and slowly calm down.

Over the next few days, he threw himself into his work. Whenever he had a moment of respite, he would think of Qiao Ruo. He knew she must still be worried about her father's illness, so he didn't dare to bother her. There was another reason he didn't contact her much: he wanted to see if he could return to the carefree, unburdened state he had when they were dating.

Despite the difficulty, he finally managed to control his longing for her, but on the day of her father's surgery, all his efforts were in vain. When she told him that she missed him terribly, the wall he had deliberately built cracked and quickly crumbled. At that moment, he felt as if he had touched her vulnerability, and his heart ached along with hers.

No woman had ever stirred his emotions like she had. In fact, he used to value maintaining distance from his partners when he was in love, and he especially disdained the kind of relationship where people were constantly on their phones chatting. In his view, while dating was a great experience, it was more important to stay rational and clear-headed and to ensure that his life rhythm was not disrupted.

Once the defenses were weakened, rebuilding that fortress became extremely difficult, and he couldn't help but give up the fight. When he blurted out "Thank you for your hard work, baby" to her on the other end of the phone, not only could she not believe it, but even he himself couldn't believe that he would use such a sweet term to address her.

What surprised him even more was that she followed up by calling him "baby" again and again. He shamefully discovered that he was actually enjoying this title that he had previously looked down upon.

He didn't know what was wrong with him, but he thought there was no need to analyze the reasons anymore. Since these little things about being with her could bring him a good mood and make him happy, he might as well accept them all.

He eagerly awaited the day she arrived in New York, believing he would have a wonderful time with her.