Cat and Princess Swap

The heroine is an imperfect ‘wild grass’ type with fierce ambition, not especially bright, and carries turbulent vitality with a strong aversion to women.

The plot highlights that while the h...

Verbal battle

Verbal battle

Two days later, before dawn, Cui Shenzhi woke Ping An up, and the two of them began to put on their court robes with the help of palace servants.

Ping An was initially very excited, but gradually she became uncomfortable under the weight of the court dress. Moreover, she felt like a puppet under the constraints of the dress, which made her feel extremely awkward.

"Shenzhi," Ping An said, looking aggrieved, "I don't want to wear this. We're going to be sitting up here anyway, can't we at least wear something more comfortable?"

“Ping An, it is mandatory to wear court attire for such a solemn occasion as attending court. Ministers must wear it, and so must we. This is a rule that has been in place since ancient times.”

Ping An really wanted to say that there had never been an emperor who married into his wife's family before, and Cui Shenzhi was doing just fine as emperor. Why couldn't she be flexible about something as trivial as a piece of clothing? But what if she said something that hurt Cui Shenzhi's feelings and he wouldn't let her attend court? She could only pout and turn away to sulk.

But the thought of seeing those princes and ministers bowing their heads, meekly submitting to her, and obeying her commands made her happy again.

Cui Shenzhi didn't know what Ping An was thinking; he only saw the changing expressions on Ping An's face and couldn't help but find it somewhat amusing.

However, when Ping An arrived at the Hall of Supreme Harmony, she did not see the scene she had imagined. Almost all the ministers looked at her with scrutiny, doubt, or even dissatisfaction. None of them were as submissive as she had imagined, let alone bowing down to submit.

On the contrary, everyone looked at Choi Shin-ji with satisfaction and trust.

This unexpected scene left Ping An quite puzzled.

She knew that the stability of the realm was mainly due to Choi Shin-ji, but wasn't the royal blood flowing in her veins also crucial? Why did these ministers view her this way? Why didn't they respect her? Why didn't they take her seriously?

She felt uneasy and instinctively grabbed Choi Shin-ji's hand.

Because of Ping An's sudden action, Cui Shenzhi paused in his speech, but since it was court time, he had to prioritize national affairs. He could only continue to deal with the reports submitted by the ministers in court while patting Ping An's hand reassuringly behind his sleeve.

Ping An, however, was not appeased.

Just then, she heard Lord Cai propose a reduction in her expenses, and without thinking, she stood up to express her opposition.

—Lord Cai was talking about reducing the palace's expenses, but right now there are only Ping An and Cui Shenzhi in the palace, so in Ping An's view, reducing the palace's expenses is the same as reducing her expenses.

"I disagree! What right do you have to cut my allowance!"

Lord Cai frowned, first glancing at Cui Shenzhi with undisguised dissatisfaction in his eyes, then looking at Ping An with a hint of reproach.

However, when it comes to his own interests, Ping An will not be afraid of him.

She glared at Lord Cai and said defiantly, "So what if I disagree?! I am a princess, the only princess at that. What right do you have to cut my allowance?"

Then he turned to Choi Shin-ji.

"You actually agreed to cut my expenses!"

“Peace…” Cui Shenzhi hurriedly explained in a low voice, “Lord Cai means that since there are only the two of us in the palace and we live together, the palaces that will be unclaimed for the next few years do not need to be cleaned by many palace servants as in previous years. They only need to be maintained periodically.”

Ping An choked up, only then realizing that she had misunderstood.

But so what if it's a misunderstanding? We won't lose face!

Ping An puffed out her chest and said fiercely but weakly, "I am a princess, the palace is my home. What difference is there between cutting the palace's expenses and cutting my expenses? I just don't agree!"

Cui Shenzhi wanted to remind Ping An, but Lord Cai spoke up before him, saying, "Your Highness, when the Emperor Emeritus was in power, he was fond of extravagance and pleasure, and indulged the deposed Consort Shen in her wanton behavior, which led to huge expenses in the palace and an empty treasury. My memorial is said to be a reduction, but in reality it is just a restoration of the old practice, and it does not count as a reduction of your expenses."

Lord Cai was explaining the reason for submitting this memorial, and he was also testing the waters.

They were testing whether Ping An was like Cui Sugong or Shen Meiwu. If so, they would have to guard against Ping An interfering in politics and even start to consider suggesting that Cui Shenzhi change the dynasty. Then they could legitimately put people around Cui Shenzhi to ruin his relationship with Ping An, and then justifiably demote Ping An to the harem. Under the pretext that the harem should not interfere in politics, they would cut off Ping An's access to politics.

However, Ping An thought completely differently.

With her hands on her hips, she said aggressively, "So what? If you think Cui Sugong is extravagant and wasteful, why didn't you bring it up when he was in power? Why did you have to bring it up when I was in power? You just think I'm an easy girl to bully!"

"You didn't say anything when Cui Sugong didn't wear the clothes embroidered with gold and silver threads, you didn't say anything when Shen Meiwu didn't use the fabrics embroidered with brocade and Shu embroidery, you didn't say anything when they searched all over the world for skilled craftsmen to make all kinds of fine things for Cui Lingxian, but you only say something after I, a lonely and helpless person who grew up in the cold palace wearing tattered clothes and shoes and eating spoiled food, and who has regained my status as a princess for less than a year, have ascended to the throne."

"Do you think it's appropriate for you to criticize me, someone who has suffered so much, after they've enjoyed everything?"

Upon hearing this, Cui Shenzhi's lips pursed into a thin line. He couldn't bring himself to say the words he wanted to persuade Ping An to agree, and Lord Cai lowered his head as well.

— Cui Shenzhi only said that Ping An grew up in the palace, so everyone assumed that Ping An was a princess with little fame and no favor, but she had no shortage of food, clothing and other necessities. No one knew how hard Ping An had suffered in the past.

Ping An felt he had won, and as he arrogantly surveyed the room and was about to sit down, a young minister jumped out.

"Your Highness, Lord Cai is not criticizing you. It's just that natural disasters have occurred one after another. His Majesty has exempted the Southern Prefecture from corvée labor and taxes for ten years and is unwilling to increase taxes to add to the burden on the people. Since there is no way to increase revenue, Lord Cai thought of cutting expenditures and that's why he put forward this memorial."

"Moreover, there are only you and His Majesty in the palace now. Even if we restore the old ways, your food, clothing and daily necessities will not be worse than when the late Emperor was alive. I hope Your Highness will consider the people of the world and pass this memorial."

Ping An doesn't care about the people, but she can't say that. After all, it's only been less than a year since Cui Sugong was overthrown. If she said that, she would definitely not get any credit.

But that doesn't mean she'll swallow her anger!

She raised an eyebrow and said, "Since you put it that way, fine, I agree. But since you say you care about the people of the world, then it can't just be Shenzhi and me making sacrifices; everyone who is supported by the world must make sacrifices!"

“The palace expenses will be restored to the old rules. The treatment of the royal family members who rely on the national treasury and are of no benefit to the country will be reduced by half. The salaries of all ministers will be reduced by 30%, and the titles and treatment of dukes, marquises, earls, viscounts and barons will also be reduced by 30%.”

Before the ministers could say anything, the members of the royal family couldn't sit still.

“Cui Pingan! Don’t forget, you and Cui Shenzhi…”

“My name is not Cui Ping’an,” Ping’an said coldly, looking at the person who jumped out. Her tone was tinged with danger. “My name is Ping’an. If you say something wrong again, I will treat you as a person of great disrespect.”

The person who jumped out choked before speaking: "...Ping An, don't forget that you and Cui Shenzhi were able to sit in this position without the support of us royal relatives. Moreover, we are your blood relatives."

"Yes, Shen Zhi and I are able to achieve our current status without your support. So please stop supporting us and find someone else to support us, as long as you can find someone else."

"As for blood being thicker than water... so what? Doesn't Cui Sugong have more right to tell me that blood is thicker than you? What did he do to me? He harmed my mother. Fu Xiuzhu has more right than you, but what did he do? He threw me away like trash. Do you think I care about your tiny bit of blood connection with me?"

"Besides, so what if you're my family? Where were you when my mother was harmed by Cui Sugong? Where were you when Fu Xiuzhu abandoned me? Where were you when I was struggling in the cold palace, so hungry that I couldn't stand up and could only curl up in a ball?"

"You have never given me the warmth of family, yet now you expect me to feed and pamper you parasites of the nation out of consideration for blood ties. What a shameless thing to do."

The royal family members were defeated.

It wasn't just because they had no ability to affect Ping An and Cui Shenzhi except for that blood connection, but also because of Fu Xiuzhu who had lost everything, and Cui Sugong who was suffering in the palace.

They knew when to stop, at least they still had half of their benefits. If they had continued to make trouble, they might have ended up with nothing like Fu Xiuzhu, or worse off than Cui Sugong.

But the ministers jumped out.

"Your Highness," the young official said, "this humble subject has studied diligently for decades..."

"Just to plunder the people's wealth?" Ping An interrupted.

The young official quickly denied it, saying, "Of course not!"

"Since that's not the case, what's wrong with you making some sacrifices for the people? Or do you think that only Shenzhi and I are supported by the nation, and that the salaries of you ministers don't come from the national treasury's taxes, but fall from the sky?"

"...The salaries of your humble servants and others naturally come from the national treasury and from taxes. However, Your Highness, after a 30% reduction, officials from humble backgrounds like yours will find it very difficult to make a living."

“Oh, I see. Then I was careless,” Ping An said with a glint in his eye, tilting his head with a malicious grin. “Then let’s treat them differently.”

Hearing this, the young minister felt a chill run down his spine. Before he could even speak to stop him, he heard what Ping An said next.

"Officials from aristocratic families will have their salaries reduced by 50%, officials with family property will have their salaries reduced by 30% as previously stated, and officials from humble backgrounds will have their salaries reduced by 10%."

The young official gasped. Ping An's actions... officials from privileged backgrounds would hate him to death! No, officials from privileged backgrounds would inevitably be targeted and hate him too! He had become the target of everyone's hatred!

"Your Highness! No..."

"Not enough?" Ping An interrupted with a half-smile, "You don't even despise officials from humble backgrounds, and you reduce the number of officials from aristocratic families by another 20%?"

Upon hearing this, the young official dared not say anything more, fearing that further words would displease others. He could only hurriedly return to his group, where he was secretly kicked several times.

At this moment, the nobles stepped forward.

“Your Highness, most of these titles are earned by those who risk their lives to serve the country. They have already given so much for the nation and the world. You should not and cannot be so cruel to them.”

"I'm cruel? What about those spoiled brats who lie on their ancestors' achievements, indulging in drinking, gambling, and prostitution, and committing all sorts of evil deeds because of their ancestors' glory? They ruined the honor that their ancestors earned with their lives with their words and deeds. Aren't they more cruel than me?"

"However, what you said makes sense. So let's do it this way. Regardless of the size of the title, the person who receives the title will not receive the same treatment. Their children will receive 30% less treatment when they inherit the title, and their grandchildren will receive 50% less treatment when they inherit the title. After that, they will be stripped of their titles and treatment. This is the reason why wealth does not last beyond three generations."

"Moreover, this scope includes not only future titles, but all titles held since the founding of the nation."

"Your Highness, do you mean to revoke all the titles of the descendants of those founding heroes? You can't do this to them!"

"No? Then are they founding heroes or founding royalty? If we can't reduce their benefits or take back their titles, then what's the difference between them and royalty? Why don't we just let them take turns sitting on the throne? How about it be your turn tomorrow?"

The nobleman quickly explained, "That's not what I meant. I meant to say..."

"Are you saying they have merit in supporting the founding of the dynasty, and are different from later generations? So you mean that although they all serve the country, there are different ranks? What about the general's mansion, which went to guard the border after the founding of the country and sacrificed the lives of several generations of the Cui family?"

Xun Gui felt the sudden murderous aura behind him and gasped, but Ping An showed no intention of letting him go.

"And have you ever thought that the one sitting on the throne now is not me, but Shen Zhi? He has a blood feud with the Cui family. What's the difference between a meritorious official of the Cui family and an accomplice of his enemy? Wasn't his throne pushed up by you incompetent people? It was pushed up by the people. Why should he take care of you?"

Although Ping An's words were somewhat unreasonable, she managed to shut down both the royal family members and high-ranking officials, leaving them with no choice but to lower their heads in embarrassment. The official Cai, who had proposed the memorial, had his face contorted in a grimace.