Please read the following disclaimer:
1. This is a main-shou (uke) redemption story. The shou, Lin Xiyan, suffers from severe depression and self-harm tendencies. His initial state is poor, a...
Attend class
The next day, Lin Xiyan woke up early. Or rather, he barely slept. Without the sound of another person breathing in the room, even the movement of the air seemed unfamiliar. He slowly packed the last of his luggage—not much, really, just books and daily necessities. Aunt Xu had already delivered most of it to his dormitory the previous day.
After breakfast, Xu Panting gave a lot of careful instructions, her eyes full of concern and worry. It was not until Lin Xiyan repeatedly assured her that he would take good care of himself and keep in touch that she felt a little relieved and watched him leave.
Standing at the familiar entrance to his unit, Lin Xiyan took a deep breath. The cool, early autumn air lingered deep in his lungs, sobering him up. Today, he too would be registering for school. A different city from Jiang Yibai, a different school, a beginning of a life truly... without him by his side.
He felt a little empty inside, but also had a faint sense of anticipation and... nervousness about the new environment. He tugged at the strap of his schoolbag and walked towards the bus stop.
The Medical University wasn't far away, just a few bus stops away. The school gates were bustling with new students and their accompanying parents, all arriving to register. Banners, signs, the clamor of voices, and the thud of suitcases rolling across the ground mixed together, creating a vibrant atmosphere that was both jarring and disorienting.
Lin Xiyan stood at the edge of the surging crowd, looking blankly at the unfamiliar school gate and the rows of old-looking buildings within. He subconsciously gripped his phone tightly, his fingertips feeling a chill.
At this moment, a loud and familiar voice penetrated the noise and hit his ears precisely:
"Xiyan! Over here! Over here!"
Lin Xiyan whipped her head around, looking in the direction of the voice. Beneath the large sycamore tree by the school gate, Lu Panji was waving his arms vigorously, grinning so wide that his teeth were visible. Next to him stood He Yunling, still maintaining his composure. He adjusted his glasses and nodded in his direction.
They... are waiting for him?
Lin Xiyan was stunned for a moment. The nervousness and loneliness that had risen in his heart due to the unfamiliar environment instantly dissipated like mist pierced by sunlight. He hurriedly made his way through the crowd and headed over there.
"You can do it, kid! You're punctual!" As soon as Lu Panji saw him coming, he warmly put his arm around his shoulders and patted them hard. "We even made a bet that you wouldn't be so nervous that you couldn't find the door!"
He Yunling glanced at Lu Panji speechlessly and said to Lin Xiyan, "Don't listen to his nonsense. Have you completed the formalities?"
Lin Xiyan was shaken by Lu Panji's pat and shook her head: "...Not yet."
"That's perfect! Let's go together!" Lu Panji waved his hand. "We'll go with you to the dormitory to put your things, and then go to handle the paperwork! I'm telling you, we both came here yesterday and have already gotten to know this area like a champ! We know which window in the cafeteria has the most meat, and which drinks in the canteen are the most thirst-quenching! We know it all!"
He chattered, full of energy, and instantly pulled Lin Xiyan out of that out-of-place bystander state, as if they were not reporting in for the first day, but had lived here for a long time.
Lin Xiyan looked at Lu Panji's excited face, then at He Yunling's silent but clearly smiling eyes, and the warmth in his heart began to surge again. He nodded gently: "...Okay."
"Come on, come on! Which building is your dormitory in?" Lu Panji asked while naturally reaching out to help Lin Xiyan with the luggage.
Lin Xiyan subconsciously dodged it: "...I can do it myself."
"Why are you being so polite to me?" Lu Panji grabbed his backpack without hesitation, threw it over his shoulder, and went to pull his suitcase. "You are our key protected person now! Brother Jiang is not here, so we have to take over this shift for him!"
He Yunling added quietly, "It's mainly because we're afraid someone will come back and settle the score with us."
Lin Xiyan's face flushed slightly, knowing they were talking about Jiang Yibai. He no longer refused, letting Lu Panji help him carry his bag, and the three of them walked towards the dormitory area together.
On the way, Lu Panji never stopped talking.
"Look over there, the library! Just looking at it makes me feel overwhelmed! I guess I'll have to stay there permanently from now on!"
"That's the gym over there! Let's play ball together when we're free!"
"Oh my, look at that senior! She's got such a great temperament! As expected, this is a medical school, full of beautiful women..."
He Yunling couldn't stand it any longer and interrupted him: "Can you be quiet? Didn't you see Xiyan didn't say anything?"
Lu Panji finally reacted, scratched his head, and leaned close to Lin Xiyan and whispered, "Well, Xiyan, are you a little nervous? Don't be afraid! I'll protect you from now on! I guarantee that no one will dare to bully you!"
Lin Xiyan looked at his confident expression, feeling both amused and warmed. He shook his head gently, "...not really nervous." Just a little uncomfortable. Unaccustomed to not having that person who always walked beside him, shielding him from most of the outside world's distractions.
"That's good!" Lu Panji breathed a sigh of relief and regained his energy. "Let me tell you, our dormitory building isn't far from you! It's just two buildings away! It'll be very convenient for you to visit us in the future!"
Arriving at Lin Xiyan's dorm, he checked in and found his room. It was a four-person room with a bed and a desk. His other three roommates hadn't arrived yet. Lu Panji and He Yunling helped him put his things away and offered various suggestions, such as how to make the quilt more comfortable and how to arrange the bookshelves more logically, although most of their suggestions sounded unreliable.
When they were almost done packing, Lu Panji slapped his head and said, "Right! Procedures! Go and do them quickly! Otherwise, there will be even more people around later!"
The three of them hurried to the new student registration area. As expected, long lines formed in front of the booths of each college. Lin Xiyan frowned slightly as he looked at the winding lines before him.
"The Department of Psychology... is over there." He Yunling pointed to a team with relatively fewer people.
"Come on! Line up!" Lu Panji pulled Lin Xiyan and stood at the end of the line.
The queue was a bit boring. Lu Panji and He Yunling started discussing which college had more girls and which major's seniors looked the most serious. Lin Xiyan stood quietly among them, listening to their chatter and looking at the unfamiliar, energetic faces around her. The sense of alienation she had felt as a newcomer was gradually replaced by a strange sense of integration.
He was no longer alone in this.
His phone vibrated in his pocket. He took it out and looked at it.
It was a message from Jiang Yibai. It was a photo of what looked like a hallway in a school building. Sunlight streamed through the huge windows, casting dappled shadows on the ground.
【Jiang Yibai: Go to class.】
It comes with the classroom number.
It was a simple message, not even asking what he was doing. But as Lin Xiyan looked at the photo, she could almost imagine Jiang Yibai walking around an unfamiliar campus, perhaps with a frown on his face, impatient with the people around him. But she subconsciously shared the scenery she saw with him, something that had nothing to do with him.
He lowered his head and typed.
Lin Xiyan: I'm waiting in line, going through the paperwork. Lu Panji and He Yunling are here.
He took a photo of the team in front, and the silhouette of Lu Panji dancing and gesticulating towards He Yunling, and sent it over.
The message was replied almost instantly.
Jiang Yibai: Yes.
【Jiang Yibai: Is it noisy?】
Lin Xiyan looked at these two words and could almost hear Jiang Yibai's cold and slightly disgusted tone. He couldn't help but curl the corners of his mouth.
【Lin Xiyan: Not bad.】
【Jiang Yibai: Call me if you have anything.】
【Lin Xiyan: Good.】
The conversation ended there. It was as concise as ever. But as Lin Xiyan held the phone, he felt remarkably reassured. He knew that even though they were miles apart, Jiang Yibai's attention never left him. He was like an invisible thread, firmly tying him and giving him the courage to explore new worlds.
"Reporting the situation to Brother Jiang?" Lu Panji leaned over to take a look with a sly look.
Lin Xiyan quickly locked the phone screen, her ears burning: "...No."
"Tsk tsk, still shy!" Lu Panji teased, but was pulled back by He Yunling.
"It's your turn, Xiyan." He Yunling reminded him.
Lin Xiyan hurried forward and handed over his documents. The senior student who handled the paperwork was very gentle, and the process went smoothly. Receiving his own campus card and dormitory key felt like a wonderful ritual. It was as if from that moment on, he had truly become a part of this place.
After finishing all the formalities, it was almost noon. Lu Panji rubbed his stomach and yelled, "I'm so hungry! Xiyan, let's go! I'll take you to the cafeteria!"
The three of them walked into the packed cafeteria, where the aroma of food and the clamor of voices mixed together, creating a bustling atmosphere. Lu Panji, familiar with the place, ushered them towards a window. "This! The braised pork is incredible! Trust me!"
After getting the food, Lin Xiyan found a seat and looked at the tempting food on the plate, then at Lu Panji, who was wolfing down his food while complaining about the canteen auntie's shaking hands, and He Yunling, who was eating quietly but occasionally chimed in.
The sunlight shone in through the huge glass windows, falling on the dining table and on them.
It’s loud, it’s crowded, and it’s… real.
This was his college life. Without Jiang Yibai by his side, he had new friends and a new environment.
He picked up the spoon and scooped a mouthful of rice into his mouth.
The taste seems pretty good.
The emptiness in my heart caused by separation seems to be filled up little by little by this noisy and mundane reality.
He knew that Jiang Yibai, who was far away in another city, was also experiencing a similar new life without his participation.
But they were all trying to move forward without seeing each other.
For that, a future where we will eventually intersect.