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That was the day Song Yicheng was buried.

After Song Yicheng's body was retrieved, everyone discussed how to tell Song Ning.

Shen Xiaoyue was worried that Song Ning would suffer from heartache and illness after losing both parents within a year, so he called Shen Yuxiu over and said that he had a good relationship with Song Ning and asked him to comfort her.

Song Ning sat in the living room, listening as those people tactfully told her that her father had left and gone to a very far place.

Her expression remained unchanged, as indifferent as if someone she had no connection with had passed away.

The others assumed she was too young to understand what "leaving" meant, so they didn't say anything more.

Not long after she left, Shen Yuxiu saw her return to her room. Worried that she would secretly hide in her room and cry again, he followed her and knocked on her door with some excuse.

When she opened the door, she looked at him with some impatience, resenting that he had disturbed her sleep, but she still let him in.

After Shen Yuxiu entered the room, he sat on a small stool in her room. He wanted to comfort her, but he was also feeling extremely guilty and didn't know how to start the conversation. Instead, Song Ning teased him for looking ugly.

So he cautiously probed whether she knew what they meant by leaving.

She sat on the bed, hugging the blanket, her expression unchanged, showing no sign of the pain of losing a loved one. She said to him, "He left a long time ago."

Shen Yuxiu couldn't quite describe her tone at the time; it seemed to contain some resentment, a hint of sadness, and an overall indifferent attitude.

For no apparent reason, his nose tingled, and his chest tightened. He felt that these words were even more painful than seeing her burst into tears.

On the day Song Yicheng was cremated, people came to take Song Ning to the funeral home.

Shen Yuxiu was not originally required to go, and during that time, he felt guilty about his secret, so he didn't insist on going.

He stood with Su Qingru at the door to see Song Ning off to the car.

Song Ning sat in the car without even glancing at him. At that moment, he felt that she didn't seem to need him much, which further confirmed his idea that it didn't matter whether he went or not.

Before the car drove away, Song Ning sat in the car and glanced at him through the window.

That glance was too fast; Shen Yuxiu was momentarily stunned.

Her eyes held a mixture of fear and unease, yet she forced herself to remain calm, as if she wanted him by her side but dared not speak up.

Shen Yuxiu considered that perhaps it was just wishful thinking on his part, and that Song Ning had no such intention at all, but he still chased after them and asked them to stop the car.

After the group got out of the car, they discussed whether to take them along. Shen Yuxiu had already gotten into the car and refused to get out no matter what. Later, Shen Xiaoyue said that it would be fine to go together, so they agreed.

After getting on the bus, Song Ning remained unchanged, still acting as if nothing was wrong. Shen Yuxiu realized he had been deluding himself.

Because she was young, they didn't dare let her see him one last time. Before the cremation, they made the younger generation kowtow three times through a piece of cloth, saying it was to send him off.

This time, Song Ning didn't argue. She did whatever others said. After kowtowing, she stood beside the corpse, staring blankly at the people wailing next to her, her expression vacant, seemingly lost in thought.

Song Ning's grandfather's generation passed away before she was born. Her mother's side had few relatives, while her father's side had relatives, but because Song Yicheng did "bad things," they didn't keep in touch much. Only those who were slightly closer to her were willing to come and say goodbye.

The funeral arrangements for Song Yicheng were basically handled by Shen Xiaoyue and his colleagues.

Since learning of Song Yicheng's death, Song Ning has not shed a single tear. During the farewell banquet, someone called her cold-blooded, saying that he was still her biological son. She was interrupted by someone saying, "She's so young, what does she know?"

Song Ning heard it, but simply walked past the person and sat down in her own seat, like a child who really didn't understand anything, picking up food one bite at a time.

But Shen Yuxiu knew her sensitivity and precociousness. She wasn't unaware of it; she had simply become accustomed to the absence of her father's love at a very young age.

During his undercover work and the arrest, Song Yicheng violated discipline and was not buried in the Yiyuan Cemetery, but was buried with Xu Zhihua instead.

On the day Song Yicheng was buried, it drizzled. An old man told her that it was the heavens crying, coming to send off her father.

Shen Yuxiu stood beside Song Ning, but Song Ning didn't even lift her eyelids and didn't say a word the whole time. The old man thought the child was heartless, so he didn't offer any comfort.

After returning from the funeral home, people gradually dispersed, leaving only a few to handle the remaining matters.

Song Ning was young and, because of local custom, she had to observe mourning. She hadn't slept the night before, so Shen Xiaoyue asked Shen Yuxiu to take her back to rest.

As she walked through the courtyard, the rain had stopped; it was just a light drizzle to begin with. Yet, rain still fell on her face, as if in her mind, a person's true departure was only when they were buried.

Shen Yuxiu thought that perhaps it was because her father was buried in the same place as her mother's grave, and he couldn't tell who she was crying for—her parents, or herself.

She walked and cried silently, so silently that you wouldn't know unless you looked. It was different from her suppressed crying at night; it was as if the tears were flowing on their own, and she didn't feel anything.

Shen Yuxiu tried to coax her, but she seemed not to hear him and continued walking.

Perhaps her eyes were blurred with tears, because she tripped and fell while crossing the stone steps. Before Shen Yuxiu could even react, she had already scraped her skin.

This time she cried very hard, as if she was in great pain, like a child who has fallen down and cried very loudly.

No matter how Shen Yuxiu tried to coax her, he couldn't, and he was getting very anxious. Other family members also came over to try to coax her, but they all knew her temperament and didn't dare to say anything out of line.

Finally, having no other choice, Shen Yuxiu asked her if she wanted him to carry her, like coaxing a child. He thought she would refuse, but to his surprise, she just stared at him with her watery eyes, sobbing, without saying whether she wanted to or not.

He had no choice but to turn his back, squat down in front of her, and let her come up.

Later, on the way back to his room, he heard her ask, "Did your father ever carry you?"

Shen Yuxiu recalled what he had learned from Song Ning about her brief reunion with Song Yicheng, and guessed the reason why she asked the question. He was at a loss for words.

Seeing that he didn't answer, Song Ning asked again, "Did he hold you too?"

Shen Yuxiu remained silent, feeling even more guilty and unable to answer.

Because he had enjoyed Shen Xiaoyue's embrace and back, which he had taken away from her.

After putting her down in the room, Shen Yuxiu's thin sweater on the back of his shoulder was a little damp.

The weather in October wasn't actually cold, but Shen Yuxiu still vividly remembers the damp chill on his shoulders.

He took out some medicine to apply to her wound and said what he had been thinking about all the way: "From now on, if you want to carry me, I will."

She sat on the stool, glared at him, and said with a childish pretense of maturity: "No."

She rarely let him carry her, saying that people who are carried look too silly, with legs like toads. She prefers to be hugged, saying that it's more comfortable that way, but actually, hugs make her feel safer.