Chapter 37 Regret (Second Update) The last gardenia you planted...

(37)

Seeing Shang Jinyue draw his sword, the sect leader immediately stood up, blocking him firmly and coldly shouting, "Shang Jinyue, put down your sword. This is the Cangshan Sect, and no one is allowed to make a move here!"

Stopped by the sect leader, Shang Jinyue suppressed her anger but still did not sheath her sword; the veins on the back of her hand were already bulging.

"Accidentally falling off a cliff? You actually came up with such a ridiculous excuse! My brother was a cultivation genius, one in a hundred years. How could he have accidentally fallen off a cliff? The only way he could have died in his life was by being killed by his wife, whom he trusted implicitly!"

He spoke with absolute certainty, enunciating each word clearly.

"You killed him, didn't you?"

Chu Li stared at him in astonishment, speechless.

As expected, her flawed lies could not possibly fool the merchants.

Shang Jinyue wanted nothing more than to strangle her, screaming, "Chu Li, why did you do this to him? Your brother has never mistreated you in the slightest, he has always been extremely protective of you, how could you do this to him?"

"I..." Chu Li didn't expect him to react like this. She had always thought that Shang Jinyue hated Shang Xinglan, and should have breathed a sigh of relief upon learning of his death.

Tears streamed down his face as he stared intently at Chu Li. "I truly regret not telling my brother your identity back then. If he had been more wary of you, perhaps things wouldn't have turned out this way."

Shang Jinyue suddenly pushed the sect leader away, grabbed Chu Li by the neck, and questioned her sharply, "And you, Chu Li, have you ever regretted it?"

Chu Li was speechless, her vision blurring as she was being choked. She heard the sect leader's angry rebuke and Shang Jinyue's almost desperate lament, "Why can't you warm your heart?"

regret.

Chu Li didn't know what regret was.

At first, she didn't feel anything after Shang Xinglan's death. She continued to live her life as usual, only that there was one less person in the house.

They fetch water, cook, and do laundry themselves, and occasionally go down the mountain to buy groceries.

She even felt a sense of relief. She used to be afraid of thunder, fearing it was a calamity. Now that Shang Xinglan was dead, she was no longer afraid of thunderstorms.

After living alone for a few days, Chu Li was surprised to find that she hadn't spoken a word in a long time.

She began to worry that being too silent would turn her into a mute, so she often talked to herself.

Chat with the chicks, confide in the gardenias, and even argue with the pot, complaining that it can no longer cook such delicious food after that person died.

Chu Li was in a bad mood every day after smashing four pots in three days.

The brighter the sunny day, the more inexplicably irritable she became.

This uneventful and carefree life was exactly what she had longed for before, but now she couldn't muster any interest in it.

She didn't know what went wrong.

Fetching water was exhausting; my back was almost broken from carrying it all the way back from the stream halfway up the mountain.

Cooking is such a hassle. Buying and preparing vegetables always leaves a mess, and after eating a perfunctory meal, you still have to wash the dishes.

The same goes for washing clothes. Before, her clothes would dry without a single wrinkle, but now they're wrinkled like tattered rags.

In the past, Shang Xinglan would never have let her do these things. He, a man who once lived in the clouds, never mentioned how troublesome and time-consuming these heavy houseworks were.

Most of the vegetables planted in the field died, and several chicks also disappeared one after another, I don't know where they ran away.

Later, even his health deteriorated.

Chu Li was often tired, had no appetite, and frequently vomited.

Suspecting she was ill, she went down the mountain to find the best doctor in the village, clutching the pile of silver notes Shang Xinglan had left her, fearing she might have an incurable disease.

The doctor carefully examined her pulse, and after finishing, he smiled and congratulated her.

"Congratulations, young lady, you are pregnant."

You're pregnant! What's the good news?

"It means she is pregnant."

Chu Li stood there dumbfounded, touching her swollen belly, unable to believe that there was a child inside.

Her child with Shang Xinglan.

After returning home, Chu Li tossed and turned, unable to fall asleep. The thought of Shang Xinglan being dead and leaving her with a huge problem kept her awake.

Childbirth was terrifying for her. She had heard her stepmother's screams when she gave birth to her younger brother, which almost echoed through the sky. Basin after basin of water, stained red with blood, was brought out, looking frighteningly red.

Even after going through countless hardships to give birth, you still have to take care of that tiny creature, about the size of a cat or dog, and share half of your food, drink, and other necessities with it.

She didn't want the child and decided to terminate it.

Life is already tough enough, why make it harder for yourself?

Chu Li didn't sleep all night, and went to see the doctor again the next day.

There were many people going to see the doctor. She was at the end of the line. In front of her was a newlywed couple, and the wife seemed to be pregnant as well.

Their laughing and chatting was an eyesore.

The man placed his hand on the woman's lower abdomen, stroking it with utmost care, as if it contained something worth protecting with his entire life.

Chu Li couldn't stay any longer and turned to leave.

She thought she would come back the next day.

When we came back the next day, there was another long queue.

Chu Li looked up at the scorching sun, and just as it was about to be her turn in line, she turned and ran away.

It's too hot, let's come another day.

Too lazy to get up today, I'll go another day; don't want to go out, I'll go another day... Day after day, Chu Li never stepped into the clinic.

"So what if it's born?" she comforted herself, thinking that life couldn't get any worse than begging.

She made a memorial tablet for Shang Xinglan, thinking that if the child asked in the future, he could tell him who his father was. After thinking it over, Chu Li was afraid that if someone discovered the name engraved on it, it would cause trouble, so she could only hide the memorial tablet under the bed.

If a memorial tablet won't do, then let's build a grave.

Chu Li spent two whole days digging with a shovel to build a grave for Shang Xinglan on the edge of the cliff. Little did she know that it would become her favorite place to go.

Whenever Chu Li felt irritable or unwell, she would go to the grave and talk to Shang Xinglan.

"Do you want this child? If so, make sure all three coins face up."

"Two facing upwards also count."

"...If they're all facing down, that counts too."

"I'm vomiting less now, but I still can't eat. I feel so awful."

"Did you receive the paper money I burned for you? Winter is coming, so buy some warm clothes. It's going to be very cold this winter."

"The last gardenia you planted has died. I'm sorry."

Do you regret it?

What constitutes regret?

—Don't you regret it?

She couldn't explain it.

Shang Xinglan's life was gradually destroyed from the moment she met her. A person as sinful as Chu Li should not have been born into this world, which is why she said that it would have been better if she had frozen to death when her stepmother threw her in the snow.

"let go!"

The sect leader finally rescued Chu Li from Shang Jinyue's grasp, pushing her behind him to protect her, and said in a deep voice, "Shang Jinyue, I have no say in your family affairs, but if you kill someone in the Cangshan Sect, you will be making an enemy of the entire Cangshan Sect, and I will never let you off easily!"

Ignoring the sect leader, Shang Jinyue coldly stared at Chu Li, raising the long sword in her hand, "I'll ask you one last time, where did your brother die?"

Chu Li gasped for breath, coughing incessantly, her legs gave way and she collapsed to her knees, tears streaming uncontrollably down her cheeks.

The palace doors were suddenly pushed open, and a ray of sunlight spread out from the crack, gradually enveloping her frail body.

The sounds in his ears seemed to come from near and far, and Chu Li couldn't hear them clearly. He could only vaguely see the astonished expression on Shang Jinyue's face.

The next moment, a hand pulled her into its embrace.

What a warm embrace, like the sun.

Chu Li looked up and saw the fury on the face of the person in front of her.

Who did it?

The conspicuous finger marks on her slender white neck clearly showed what she had just experienced.

Shang Jinyue stared at him in disbelief, the sword slipping from her hand. "Brother, why..."

With a snap.

Shang Jinyue's face was slapped so hard it was tilted to the side.

Enraged, Shang Xinglan picked up the sword from the ground, but before he could get up, he was pulled back by the person in his arms.

Chu Li coughed twice to catch her breath. She gripped Shang Xinglan's hand tightly and whispered, "No."

Upon hearing her voice, Shang Xinglan immediately looked at her and asked anxiously, "How are you? Where else did he hurt you?"

Chu Li shook her head, gesturing for him to help her up.

The sect leader stepped forward and offered a helping hand; the two carefully helped her back to her seat.

A cup of tea was handed to her. Chu Li took a small sip, her throat feeling as if it were being cut by a knife. She swallowed it with difficulty and said softly to Shang Xinglan, "It was my fault for telling him you were dead. I shouldn't have lied."

As soon as the words fell, Shang Xinglan immediately understood everything. It must have been these words that made Shang Jinyue believe that Chu Li had killed him, which was why she wanted to avenge him.

Why would Chu Li make such a joke to Shang Jinyue?

He was extremely puzzled, but he could only suppress his doubts, cup her face in his hands and examine Chu Li carefully, then asked softly, "Are you alright?"

"It's okay, it's really okay." Chu Li lowered her head and didn't look up at him.

Shang Xinglan felt a little relieved and said to the sect leader, "I am truly sorry that this matter was caused by me. Please forgive me for making this a laughing stock of you, sect leader."

The sect leader waved his hand, wiping the sweat from his forehead. "Don't worry about it. Since it's your family matter, I won't interfere any further."

He got up to leave, but before leaving, he turned back and picked up the sword from the ground. "I will keep this for you. Don't do anything to it. We should keep the family at peace."

Chu Li nodded obediently and watched him leave.

Shang Jinyue stood up, his face still bearing bright red finger marks. He stood silently for a long while before whispering, "I'm sorry, sister-in-law."

He still couldn't understand why Chu Li would lie to him about something as important as life and death. Was he joking? This joke wasn't funny at all.

Shang Xinglan said coldly, "Sorry?"

He almost strangled Chu Li to death! He didn't treat her like that even when he climbed back from the bottom of the cliff!

Shang Jinyue pursed her lips and looked at him, saying, "I misunderstood my sister-in-law. I am guilty and will accept my brother's punishment according to family law."

He knelt down and handed over the sword sheath. "Brother, you can kill me or torture me as you please. I just want to know why my sister-in-law lied to me."

Hearing his words, Chu Li twisted the hem of her clothes and whispered, "Didn't you want to get rid of Shang Xinglan?"

As soon as the words were spoken, Shang Xinglan and Shang Jinyue simultaneously looked up at the people seated on the table.

"What?" Shang Jinyue almost thought she had misheard.

Chu Li dared not look at him even more, and her voice was soft, "When we were in the Shang family, you always forced me to leave the Shang family with Shang Xinglan. When I refused you, you threatened me, saying that you would tell Shang Xinglan my identity... I thought it was because you wanted to inherit the position of head of the Shang family that you did this."

Upon hearing this, Shang Jinyue was speechless, his face turning even redder. He looked up at Shang Xinglan and then at Chu Li. "The reason I asked you to leave the Shang family is because I saw how much my brother cherishes you, and your identity will inevitably be exposed sooner or later, and you will definitely not be tolerated by the family head. That's why I advised you to go far away."

He took a deep breath, rubbed his forehead, and said, "Besides, the position of family head should have been inherited by me, because my elder brother will ascend to heaven one day."

They were brothers born of the same mother, and there was no way they would kill each other for the position of family head.

Why would Chu Li think so badly of people? Doesn't she have any brothers or sisters?

The truth came out, and Chu Li was so ashamed that she couldn't lift her head.

No matter where she is, she is always the most annoying one, with a wicked mind and the assumption that others are like her.

She also hated this version of herself.

A hand landed on her head and gently patted it.

Shang Xinglan leaned down, staring at Chu Li's blushing face, and said gently, "You lied and said I was dead because you were afraid he would kill me?"

Chu Li sniffed and nodded.

He chuckled softly, then wiped away the tears on her face with the back of his finger.

"fool."

Chu Li was clumsily protecting him in her own way, so how could she bear to blame her?

As he gently stroked her, Chu Li finally raised her head and stared blankly at Shang Xinglan's face.

She is not used to relying on anyone because she has never had a reliable person to lean on since she was a child.

But it wasn't until after Shang Xinglan's death that she realized that he had permeated her life, and every thing she did wrong was because he had done so much for her.

I regret it.

How could I not regret it?