Hanging in a hallucination

Yu Sheng's hand holding the phone trembled uncontrollably, while Lu Chenyang in the video appeared remarkably calm and collected.

The image is dominated by a medical report. The paper is yellowed with age, and the creases are frayed from repeated unfolding. The seal of the CIR Institute for Psychotherapy is stamped on it.

Then, Lu Chenyang's calm voice came through. He was apologizing to the public, his tone sincere but not humble, explaining that he did not intend to hide anything, but that he had suffered memory loss due to severe trauma, and that he had proof from an authoritative medical institution.

Without stirring up emotions or trying to gain sympathy through self-pity, Lu Chenyang simply and calmly stated the objective facts of the relationship between himself, his mother, and Yang Tieshuan—that of victim and perpetrator.

Yu Sheng felt a sharp pain in her heart, as if she were being dragged into ice water and then pulled out and placed on a fire.

Fifteen days have passed. Half a month has passed since Lu Chenyang's public response, and he only just now saw the replay. If it weren't for the secretary sent by Yu Huaiyin to pick him up at the airport downloading the video in advance, he would still be completely unaware.

The roar of the plane seemed to be shut out, and all that could be heard was the video playing on a loop on his phone, repeatedly piercing his heart and telling him that he had missed too much.

The flight, lasting more than ten hours, turned into an ordeal. As soon as the plane came to a stop on the tarmac, Yu Sheng immediately turned on her phone, then froze in her seat.

His phone showed that he had received 37 missed calls from Lu Chenyang in the past forty minutes.

He called back immediately.

Once...

Twice...

Three times...

"The user you dialed is temporarily unavailable..." Even after Yu Sheng got into the car that came to pick her up, the call still didn't go through.

My palms were so sweaty I could barely hold my phone, and the cold air from the air conditioner made my hands itch like they were being pricked with needles.

"Old Hao, let's go home!"

Old Hao quickly turned the steering wheel to change the route. Lan Zhong, sitting in the back seat, remained completely silent, burying his head in the sand like an ostrich, occasionally glancing at Yu Sheng's expression, not daring to speak for fear of being scolded. After all, his older brother had told him about Lu Chenyang's situation, but he had kept it from Yu Sheng without her knowledge.

Yu Sheng had no time to pay attention to Lan Zhong's little schemes; his entire heart was focused on Lu Chenyang. But just then, his phone started vibrating incessantly, with notification sounds ringing incessantly.

There were thousands of delayed WeChat messages. They were all sent by Lu Chenyang during the two months they had been apart, but he hadn't been able to receive them.

The phone was flooded with messages, causing it to lag and finally stop after several minutes. The time of the last received message matched the time of the last missed call.

He said, 'Ah Sheng, I saw a star; it's calling me. Can I go see it first, and then come back to you?'

Xingxing? Yu Sheng had never heard of this name before and was certain that Lu Chenyang did not have this person in his circle of friends.

He quickly scrolled up to read the unread messages. Starting about a month ago, Lu Chenyang's messages became fragmented, chaotic, and illogical, sometimes like a child starved of love, and sometimes like an old man in his twilight years.

Finally, Yu Sheng found traces of "stars" in these fragments.

But this did not relieve him; instead, it pushed his nerves to their limit.

Because the star is already dead!

Yu Sheng quickly flipped through her contacts and dialed A Jiang's number. The phone rang for a long time before being answered, with background noise.

"Hey? Brother Yu Sheng? You're back?" A Jiang asked breathlessly, as if he had been on a journey.

"Ah Jiang! Where are you? Where's Lu Chenyang? Why isn't he answering the phone?" Yu Sheng spoke very quickly.

"I... I was helping Sister Zhou with some things outside, and I just finished. Brother Chenyang... he said he wanted to be alone, so I was planning to go see him after I finished. He was fine when I left, but he looked very tired..."

"He's home alone right now?!" Yu Sheng's voice suddenly rose. "You! Go to his house right now! Quickly!"

After hanging up the phone, Yu Sheng felt like she could hardly breathe.

"Old Hao! Faster!" he roared, veins bulging on his forehead.

However, what I feared most came to pass. Two or three kilometers from our destination, the surrounding vehicles gradually slowed down, eventually coming to a complete stop. The endless stream of cars ahead, like a dead python, completely blocked the road. The incessant honking of horns only intensified my anxiety.

"Damn it!" Yu Sheng cursed under his breath, staring at the message on the screen that read, "He's calling me... Can I go see him first, and then come back to find you?" Then, looking at the motionless line of cars in front of him, a familiar panic overwhelmed him like a giant wave.

He can't be stopped here any longer, not even for a second!

He flung open the car door, and the scorching air instantly enveloped him. He didn't care about anything else; he ran frantically towards home.

His lungs burned in the scorching air, his legs felt like lead, and every step he took was a test of willpower. He was terrified, his heart pounding in his throat, afraid that even a second's delay would lead to an irreversible tragedy.

This fear drove him more intensely than any physical exhaustion, causing him to shove aside pedestrians and bump into obstacles without feeling any pain.

The skyscrapers rushed past him, the city's hustle and bustle becoming a blurred background. All he could see was the road leading to Lu Chenyang's house.

This is the second time. Is he going to lose him again?

Under the scorching sun, sweat streamed into his eyes, blurring his vision. He felt as if he were back in that night, back when Lu Chenyang lay in the hospital bed, and Qin Nan told him that an overdose of gamma-hydroxybutyric acid could be fatal.

But there was no fire axe for him to vent his anger, no enemy to drive him mad, only the endless scorching sun and the panic that threatened to kill him.

He began to pray that if there truly was a god, he would share his lifespan with him, even if it was only twenty or ten years left.

Please, please, don't let anything happen to him...

He was completely exhausted when he finally saw the familiar apartment building. Lan Zhong and A Jiang also arrived at the door at the same time, panting heavily.

"The key! Quick!" Yu Sheng roared at A Jiang, her voice completely distorted.

Ajiang frantically pulled out the key, and due to extreme nervousness, he tried several times before finally aligning it with the keyhole.

With a click, the door opened.

Yu Sheng was the first to rush in.

The living room was dark, with the lights off and the curtains drawn. The air was thick with the pungent smell of cologne, almost suffocating, mixed with a faint… metallic scent.

Then, he saw Lu Chenyang.

He lay quietly on the sofa, his face serene, as if he were asleep with a smile on his face.

In the dim light, one of his arms hung limply at the edge of the sofa, dark red blood dripping from his pale fingertips and pooling on the floor.

Like an actor who has finally finished performing in the grand drama of life and is wearily taking his final bow, he wears a red ribbon that hangs down too brightly, announcing the end of the performance.

Occasionally, a gust of wind would sweep through the crack in the window that was never fully closed, and the blood droplets congealed at the ends of the "ribbon" would tremble slightly, a final, lingering attachment.

Time stood still at this moment.

"Call an ambulance! Call an ambulance now!!!" Lan Zhong's screams rang out.

Ah Jiang was on the phone, her voice trembling with tears, incoherently reciting the address.

Yu Sheng couldn't hear anything, only vaguely sensing someone rushing towards him like a madman. He tried to move, but his legs no longer belonged to him; with a thud, he knelt straight on the floor.

It didn't hurt; he felt nothing. The immense impact shattered his reason. He couldn't feel his breath, couldn't feel himself; only an endless cold remained, as if his own soul had been torn apart by the wound and drained away with his blood.

Everything before him felt utterly unreal, a twisted nightmare. He stared at Lu Chenyang's quiet, distant face, as if afraid he would vanish into thin air at any moment. He raised his hand, but grasped nothing.

He crawled closer, almost there. He surrendered all his instincts to getting closer, staggering as he crawled to the sofa.

Only when her fingertips touched the still-warm blood did Yu Sheng finally find her voice: "Chenyang, I... I'm back... I won't let you go to anyone else, be good..."

He ripped off his disheveled tie and roughly but forcefully wrapped it around the terrible wound on Lu Chenyang's wrist, tightening it again and again, trying to stop the loss of life.

"Chenyang... Lu Chenyang!" He wanted to cry but no tears came. His attempts to shed tears had failed.

There was no response.

At this moment, his world completely lost its faith.

His white knight no longer wanted him.

After a brief loss of control, reason returned abruptly. Yu Sheng bent down, slipped his arms under Lu Chenyang's neck and knees, and lifted him up in his arms.

Lu Chenyang's body leaned limply against him, so light it startled him. Yu Sheng gritted his teeth, ignoring his trembling body, and rushed towards the door, each step teetering on the edge of collapse.

He had only one thought: if he could save even a minute or a second, he might be able to keep his lover.

...

The moment the emergency room doors closed, Yu Sheng's world was sucked into a vacuum. What followed felt like a blurry, slow torture. The nurses' hurried footsteps and the slow ticking of the clock on the wall felt like dull knives cutting into his nerves.

He stood motionless outside the operating room, staring at the red-glowing "Operating in Progress" sign, like a sculpture whose soul had been ripped from its statue. Lu Chenyang's face flashed uncontrollably through his mind—the faces that smiled at him, the faces that were angry at him, and finally, that lifeless face.

That night, when they parted on bad terms, he was filled with a mixture of sadness and anger, believing it to be a forceful act of possession, a humiliation, and, more importantly, a betrayal of Lu Chenyang's promise to protect him. Therefore, he resolutely chose to go abroad and cut off all contact.

During the two months of absence, Yu Sheng initially thought it was a punishment for Lu Chenyang, a lesson for biting his owner's dog. Later, when the typhoon arrived, Yu Sheng naturally ensured that he wouldn't receive any phone calls for more than sixty days.

When Yu Sheng thought the punishment was enough, the prey had sheathed its claws, and the puppy should behave, he turned around and found himself facing a backlash he couldn't bear.

He recalled the first time Lu Chenyang cried in front of him, like a child who had gone mad and made a mistake. He said, "Bai Hua said that there's no such thing as a cure for mental illness; it requires careful nurturing for a lifetime. Since I'm effective for you, please keep me, okay? I beg you."

This phrase seems like a curse, lingering and persistent.

The original intention of the "medicinal catalyst" has never been so ironic, questioning his conscience as it is now.

He thought he was the hunter, only to realize in the end that he had already become the other's prisoner.