Mirage

The music video shoot lasted a week. Xinghua Entertainment had just signed a new singer, and the music video for the album's title track was produced to film-quality standards, featuring not only Lu Chenyang but also He Wei.

On set, A-Jiang's gaze lingered on Lu Chenyang for the umpteenth time.

When the camera is on him, he is still the perfect actor Lu Chenyang, always getting his performance right in one take, rarely needing a retake. But as soon as the director yells "cut" and the camera moves away, the glimmer of light in Lu Chenyang's eyes vanishes in an instant.

He Wei had just leaned closer to ask him if Chen Yang had been too tired lately, or if the online criticism had been too much for him.

Ajiang could only offer a vague, dry laugh, unable to provide a real answer.

Ah Jiang knew that Lu Chenyang had started taking those pills ever since that night when they left the club in the South District. White and green, packaged in bottles covered with labels. He had secretly checked; they were all potent prescription psychotropic drugs, and the instructions listed side effects in a dense, alarming array.

He watched helplessly as Lu Chenyang's weight visibly decreased. He had difficulty concentrating for long periods of time, and when not filming, he would often curl up alone in a corner of the lounge, motionless, his eyes staring blankly into the air, unfocused.

The once vibrant and even somewhat arrogant Lu Chenyang had long since withered away. Looking at his now deathly still expression, Ajiang felt a profound emptiness and unease.

After parking the car downstairs at Lu Chenyang's house, Ajiang almost pleaded, "Brother, how about we tell Sister Zhou that we can rest for a few days and go see Dr. Bai?"

Just now, this person fell into that absent-minded state again, as if he had been dragged into a black hole in another dimension. He called out several times before he got a response.

Lu Chenyang didn't answer, but instead asked softly, "Ajiang, how is your uncle's health?"

Ajiang was speechless. A few months ago, his uncle was diagnosed with a brain tumor in a dangerous location. The hospital in their hometown was helpless, and after coming to Beijing, they couldn't get an appointment with a specialist, and the money they brought with them was almost gone. It was Lu Chenyang who arranged for him to be admitted to Yaoguang Hospital and have the best specialist perform the surgery.

He knew Lu Chenyang was bringing this up to shut him up, but he couldn't stay silent. "Brother, you should at least go see Dr. Bai. The doctor you told me to find just sells medicine for money; that's not legitimate at all! What if..."

"There's nothing to worry about." Lu Chenyang rubbed his throbbing temples, patiently trying to convince his worried assistant, though it was more like he was convincing himself. "The medications I'm taking are all prescriptions that Dr. Bai used to write. I know what I'm doing, so don't worry."

Ah Jiang slowly shrank back into the driver's seat, looking like a wilted eggplant. "Brother, you must take care of yourself. If you feel unwell, you must tell me immediately! If..." He had a sudden inspiration and finally found a reason that might restrain the other party, "If Brother Yu Sheng sees you like this, he will definitely be furious!"

“So,” Lu Chenyang opened the car door, letting in the night wind, “you have to keep this a secret. Don’t let the company know, and Ah Sheng… won’t know.”

The sky was already dark, and the summer night breeze was not cool, but Lu Chenyang wrapped his windbreaker tighter and slowly walked into the doorway of the apartment building, his figure disappearing into the distance.

The wind was strong, and the night sky over Koyari Island was covered with thick clouds, obscuring the moonlight. The only sound was the crashing of the waves.

Yu Sheng nestled on the sofa, his fingertips repeatedly stroking the buttons on the satellite phone; he had already memorized that number by heart.

"Hey, Yu Lao Er, are you going to call or not? If not, I haven't spoken to my brother all afternoon," Lan Zhong yelled, sprawled on the other sofa.

"Get out of here, you bastard." Yu Sheng was annoyed and kicked him irritably.

"By the way, Sister Huaiyin called today when you weren't here. She's applying for flight routes, but it's not going smoothly. They're giving way to emergency flights right now, so it'll probably take another ten days or so for it to be approved."

"Hmm." Yu Sheng replied absentmindedly, then kicked him again. "Go back to your room, I want to sleep."

"Tsk—" Lan Zhong was dissatisfied and deliberately acted spoiled, lying down on Yu Sheng and using his lap as a headrest, saying in a high-pitched voice, "Brother Yu Sheng~ can you hold me while we sleep?"

"Get out, get out, stop being disgusting."

*

The room was pitch black and quiet, and the phone ringing was particularly piercing. It felt like it could pierce eardrums and explode directly in my brain.

Lu Chenyang was awakened by the pain, his forehead instantly soaked with cold sweat. He squinted at his phone. The only light source in the room made his eyes sting and he felt dizzy.

—Ah Sheng.

The caller ID displayed these two words.

“…Ah Sheng? Ah Sheng!” He lunged forward, his hands trembling so badly he could barely hold the phone. Like a drowning man clutching a lifeline, he desperately pressed it to his ear. His throat tightened, his tongue stiffened, and he couldn’t utter a complete sentence.

"Ah Sheng?...Speak...Can you hear me?"

He held his breath, praying that the long-lost sound would appear. Was Ah Sheng still angry? He couldn't even dream of him anymore.

"Ah Sheng?"

There was no response.

He repeatedly pressed the volume button until the volume bar on the screen reached the top, and the earpiece was pressed tightly against his ear, producing a series of buzzing sounds due to the excessive volume.

But there was nothing else, nothing but his own heavy breathing and pounding heartbeat.

Sudden.

"BOOM—!!!"

A deafening clap of thunder cleaved the heavens and earth, shaking the windowpanes. My icy fingers seemed to have had their nerves snapped by the roar; they jerked violently, and my phone slipped from my grasp, crashing to the floor, bouncing once before flipping screen-down into the shadows under the bed.

Lu Chenyang stood frozen in place, like an old machine that had been short-circuited by lightning, all reactions interrupted and needing time to restart.

A few seconds later, he suddenly rolled off the bed, frantically crawling his upper body under the bed, groping frantically through the dust. Only when his fingertips touched the phone did he seem to find his heartbeat again, and he carefully picked it up and held it back in his hands as if it were a precious treasure.

He didn't even bother to go back to bed; he hurriedly unlocked the screen while kneeling on the floor, his heart pounding so hard it felt like it was going to shatter his sternum.

He was terrified, afraid that the call had already been disconnected.

The screen lit up.

But what appeared wasn't the call interface, but a WeChat chat window. It was a message Yu Sheng had sent him a long time ago, which he had found before going to bed, asking him to buy something on his way home.

...What about the call?

His pupils contracted sharply, his fingers trembled as he exited WeChat, and he eagerly opened the call log, wanting to call back.

However, the most recent record clearly shows "Ajiang" and the time is this afternoon.

What about that phone call just now...?

He clearly saw "Ah Sheng's" name appear on the screen, he heard the ringtone, and he even answered it... but there was no one on the other end! How could it be... gone?

A feeling of suffocation washed over me, my blood stopped flowing, my hands and feet felt numb and swollen, and my lips felt strangely itchy.

It's so stuffy. This room is like a sealed-off iron can. He needs oxygen; he has to open the window.

It took him a full minute in the dark to barely make out the direction of the window.

My legs were so weak I couldn't feel them, so I could only crawl in that direction using both my hands and feet.

The bedroom wasn't big, and its layout was simple; he knew it by heart. But tonight, he climbed for a long time, unable to touch the wall or feel the curtains.

That window was like a mirage that could never be reached.

Lu Chenyang had never experienced this kind of despair.

No, he experienced it when he was seven years old, on the land where he saw a star fall.

Impatience, hesitation, helplessness, suffocation...

Lu Chenyang finally collapsed onto the floor, his limbs weak, his cheek pressed against the cold wooden floor, panting.

Wasn't it thundering? Wasn't it supposed to rain? Why can't I hear anything at all?

Is his ear damaged? Is his eardrum ruptured? Or is it sensory dysfunction?

He gave up thinking and gradually numbly accepted the fact that he might really be terminally ill.

He didn't want to move anymore, and the floor was fine; its cool temperature could gradually absorb the cold sweat that had seeped out.

Just as his consciousness was about to fade, a familiar scent drifted over. It was the cologne that Yu Sheng wore, faint yet like a thin thread, binding his fading mind.

Just a little bit more... it seems so close... just a little bit more... I can almost grab it...

The scent was elusive, like a cunning ghost, guiding him to crawl forward with his last ounce of strength, only to vanish without a trace just before he was about to touch it.

It's too bland. This house hasn't felt Yu Sheng's presence for far too long.

Even this faint, ethereal illusion became his only lifeline at this moment.

He curled up in the direction where the scent had last disappeared, finally exhausting all his energy in this self-constructed cage filled with false familiarity, and closed his eyes heavily.

The next morning, Ajiang brought breakfast to the door and found Lu Chenyang in the deepest part of the closet in the second bedroom's walk-in closet.

Ajiang didn't dare to go up and wake him.

The Lu Chenyang he saw was curled up at the bottom of the wardrobe, hugging a large pile of clothes, as if trying to hide himself completely inside.

His pale, thin face was buried deep in Yu Sheng's old sweater, his brows furrowed, unable to find peace even in his sleep.

That posture was like a stray puppy that had luckily found a cardboard box to take shelter in a storm, desperately protecting the only bone in its arms, which didn't actually exist, both desperate and stubborn.

Lu Chenyang woke up at noon. Ajiang sat quietly on the carpet next to the wardrobe, keeping him company without daring to leave.

Seeing that Lu Chenyang was awake, Ajiang quickly got up, helped him out of the closet full of clothes, and settled him on the sofa in the living room. He then poured him a glass of warm water and watched him take his medicine.

Throughout the entire process, Ajiang didn't ask a single question about why he was sleeping in the closet; he simply tried to make everything seem normal so that Ajiang wouldn't feel any discomfort or embarrassment.

He swallowed a handful of white pills and blue capsules mixed with warm water, feeling nauseous and churning in his stomach. He barely managed to hold it in. He tilted his head back and gulped down several more mouthfuls of water, then held his forehead for a long time, waiting for the discomfort to subside.

Ajiang went into the kitchen to check the breakfast he had brought; it was already cold. A layer of soy pulp had settled at the bottom of the cup of soy milk, making it undrinkable.

"Brother, what would you like to eat? I can go out and buy it, or I can cook at home. You haven't tried my cooking yet." Ajiang forced a relaxed smile, pretending to be nonchalant, and opened the empty refrigerator, rummaging through it as if he could really find some non-existent ingredients inside.

"I guess... there's no time left." Lu Chenyang leaned on the sofa armrest, stood up with some difficulty, and wanted to wash up. "I remember I have an advertisement shoot this afternoon."

“…Brother.” Just as Lu Chenyang was about to enter the bathroom, Ajiang finally gave up struggling and called out to him. He twisted his hands helplessly in front of him, his eyes filled with unconcealed worry and heartache. “Brother, Sister Zhou called this morning and said… said that you should rest for a few days and that all your work should be postponed for the time being.”

"Hmm?" Lu Chenyang turned around, his brain still foggy and unable to process the information for a moment.

"That...the surveillance footage of you meeting that person at the South City Club...it's been leaked, and it's all over the internet now. The public opinion isn't good," Ajiang added with difficulty, his voice growing softer.

South City Club? Lu Chenyang leaned against the door frame, trying to concentrate his scattered thoughts and get his brain working again.

Chengnan Clubhouse, Yang Tieshuan.

But how could there be surveillance cameras in the private rooms of a club? It would be more accurate to say they were secretly filmed.