Chapter 851 Treating her only as Song Chunxue

The next day, Song Chunxue returned to Jincheng by flying boat.

On the 23rd day of the twelfth lunar month, it is said that the Kitchen God goes to Heaven and returns on New Year's Eve.

After sending off the Kitchen God, you can do a thorough cleaning on the 24th, cleaning inside and out, without worrying about displeasing the Kitchen God.

She spent five days visiting each child's home and staying one night at each of their homes.

She bought some fresh meat snacks, flour, and fireworks for the children. Watching the children jumping and skipping with their little firecrackers, she felt very gratified.

On such days, everyone prays for favorable weather, full granaries, and national peace and prosperity in the coming year.

All five children have started their own families, and seeing them busy taking care of their children, Song Chunxue forgot her resentment.

Watching her eldest son and his wife bustling around in the kitchen, preparing a lot of food for her, she was glad she had realized her mistake early.

Looking at the eldest brother's face, which was so similar to his father's, she remembered that she had once favored the eldest brother because she had been sincere towards Jiang Shuming and harbored resentment, hatred, and regret towards him.

But so what?

After much deliberation, she still didn't tell the eldest brother about the monk. Instead, she listened quietly as he mentioned the monk who had come to their house to ask for water.

It turned out that when the monk came here, he had disguised himself as an old monk, dressed in tattered clothes, and even stayed overnight.

"Mother, that person asked about my father and said that he has already been reincarnated. Do you think it's true?"

The eldest son, holding the child, leaned against the headboard, looking at the stewed pork ribs on the table beside him, and said softly, "That monk even went to our old courtyard. People in our village all say that the monk's walking posture is exactly the same as my father's."

Song Chunxue looked at him without saying anything.

Chen Fengsheng's two children are both quiet and don't cling to their eldest. The eldest is holding Liangliang, his and Xu Dahong's first child.

The little girl looks a lot like the eldest son. She's at the age where she's learning to speak, and she keeps calling him "Daddy," which makes the eldest son smile.

She wouldn't interfere in her children's family affairs, nor would she say much about them.

Living at home and supporting a family is just like this: firewood, rice, oil, salt, soy sauce, vinegar, tea, and even the smallest details are all important.

Children grow up day by day, and we grow old day by day. In the blink of an eye, we're half-buried in the earth.

She had already experienced a life where she could see the end from the beginning.

Therefore, she felt sorry for the eldest brother.

He is selfish and short-sighted, but he was born of Song Chunxue herself, so he has no choice but to blame himself.

She only cared about having children, but didn't have the ability to raise them.

Now that I have a higher perspective, those things that once caused me pain and struggle seem insignificant.

The reason people suffer is simply because they cannot see through things and still desire too much.

Before leaving, she did not refuse the delicious food that the eldest son and his wife had packed, but left him with silver and cloth, and then led the mule away.

On the 27th day of the twelfth lunar month, during the coldest period of winter, people's ears were slapped painfully from the cold.

Song Chunxue came to Sanwa's house and sat with him, eating sunflower seeds and roasted potatoes. They also ate stir-fried pork belly and intestines. Mulan's cooking skills were the best among the daughters-in-law.

“Mother, you look even better now that you’ve been to the capital. It seems you feel more at ease being with Lord Xie.” Sanwa peeled a boiled egg and handed it to her. “We’re all doing well, Mother. Don’t worry. Actually, it’s alright if you don’t come back to see us.”

Song Chunxue glanced at him, "You say it's okay, but when you get together in private, you'll definitely say that you don't remember you gave birth to the child now that you have Lord Xie."

Sanwa laughed, raising his hand to brush the eggshells that had fallen on his clothes to the ground; he could barely see them.

"How did you know? The fourth brother was saying just a couple of days ago that you were so fair and just, giving each family a pig's leg for one night's stay, five taels of silver as a talisman for each child, and a silver bracelet for each child. You're clearly in a hurry to go back and see Lord Xie."

Song Chunxue was too lazy to correct her.

In front of Sanwa, she summoned Wuyou and asked, "How's your sword practice going?"

Sanwa suddenly sat up straight, stuffed the egg covered in minced garlic into his mouth, and panicked.

"Eat slowly, don't choke, what's the rush?"

Sanwa patted his chest, swallowed the egg, then gulped down a mouthful of wine, his eyes rolling back as he ate the egg.

“Mother, I practice every day, but I’m not very good at it. A few days ago, after finishing my training, I came down the mountain with Changfeng and we even had a sparring match. I lost and was very upset.”

He meant that we should never test him again, because we definitely couldn't beat him.

"How's your studying going? Are you becoming more adept at being an official than before?"

Upon hearing this, Sanwa felt a chill run down his spine.

"Mother, are you here on behalf of Lord Xie to check whether I have failed his expectations and colluded with those people?"

"Did you collude with them? Did you do something wrong and deceive your own conscience?"

Sanwa shook his head, "I didn't, I swear to God."

"Whether it's true or not, you know it yourself, and no one's supervision will help. But there are some things I, as your mother, need to make clear, so that you won't go astray in the future, and I won't regret not talking to you properly."

Sanwa sat up straight and said, "Mother, please speak, I'm listening."

"No, I'll go get paper and pen and write it down."

Looking at the official boots on his feet, which fit even better than the ones Xie Zheng wore back then, Song Chunxue felt greatly comforted.

Throughout her life, she felt that she was remarkable, and at the same time, she felt that she had taken advantage of the opportunity given by God to change the fate of her family, and that it was all worth it.

“Tell me, Mother, I’ll remember.”

Song Chunxue didn't think he was being insincere. Instead, she said earnestly, "Sanwa, what do you think life is all about?"

"Hmm... what is it, wholeheartedly devoted to goodness, and worthy of one's ancestors?"

"Hmph, why talk about such a vast void? If you're true to yourself, you've already attained immortality."

Sanwa nodded emphatically, "That makes sense. I was just asking myself that question the other day, and Mother's answer came at just the right time."

Song Chunxue leaned back in her recliner. "Now you know how to make me happy?"

"Not only that, I'm also good at comforting myself now. I act as my own teacher, patiently instructing myself so that I don't get blinded by traps."

Song Chunxue's heart warmed. "That's good. In this life, never fool yourself or deceive yourself. If you try to avoid or move on from the past, it will stay in your heart forever."

"As the ancients said, if you can't sweep a room, how can you sweep the world? But sweeping a room is easy; cleaning your own heart is the hardest. If you can't resolve a thought, you might think it's okay if you put it aside for now, but if you bring it up again years later, it's like a thunderbolt that will knock you down. Being an official is not like farming or raising sheep; you must always be vigilant."

Song Chunxue patted his shoulder earnestly, "Sanwa, I don't want you to become Xie Zheng, nor do I want you to become some powerful or great official. I just want you to have a clear mind and be upright and honest."

Sanwa put down his pen and paper and buried his head in Song Chunxue's lap.

Soon, Song Chunxue felt a warmth on her legs, and Sanwa cried.

This child, who never knew how to act cute when he was little, now cries in front of her.

That's good, that's good.

“Mother, don’t worry, I will keep myself in check.” Sanwa’s muffled voice came from behind. “So Mother, you don’t need to worry about us. Be your Master Song and be a good teacher to us.”

"Since you've come up the mountain to cultivate, forget whose mother you are. Just think of yourself as Song Chunxue, okay?"