Chapter 44: "Let's Start Over"

"What a coincidence, I haven't eaten either." He put down Xiao Xi, took off his coat, rolled up his sleeves, looked in the refrigerator, and asked Qiao Shu if she wanted stewed beef.

Qiao Shu poured him a drink, then asked, puzzled, "You want to do it?"

Yu Zeheng then asked, "Do you want to eat?"

Qiao Shu hesitated for a moment before nodding.

"Don't finish the red wine, I have a use for it." Yu Zeheng took out the ingredients from the refrigerator. He was going to make red wine braised beef, and serve it with salad and side dishes. It looked quite presentable.

Qiao Shu was skeptical about Yu Zeheng's ability to cook until he presented her with a steaming bowl of stewed beef, at which point she was certain he really could.

Yu Zeheng noticed the confusion in her eyes and said while wiping his hands with a towel, "I was living abroad all the time, and I didn't like having other people living in my house. I would cook for myself when I had time."

I am filled with deep respect.

"In your eyes, have I always been a good-for-nothing spoiled brat?"

Qiao Shu felt guilty under his gaze, so she smiled and corrected him: "Wrong, I didn't expect someone to be such a good racer, tall and handsome, and also able to cook."

"Don't speak too soon, try it and then speak."

Qiao Shu propped herself up on her arms, took a small bite, and under Yu Zeheng's gaze, raised an eyebrow: "It's really good. I'm correcting what I said earlier. It's not that you can cook, but that you cook so well."

She never hesitates to praise people.

"Have a meal."

They sat down at the table, clinked glasses, and ate happily. Perhaps it was the special time, or perhaps they had drunk some alcohol, but the two chatted for a long time, from the reason they chose Xiaoxi because she took the initiative to approach them, to what they had been doing for the two years they had been apart.

The atmosphere was so good that a bottle of red wine was already empty.

On the day they filed for divorce, no one expected that they would be able to sit down and chat so calmly as they are now.

Yu Zeheng swallowed the wine, tasting both its sweetness and intensity. He looked at her across the table and asked, "What if we hadn't gotten divorced back then?"

Qiao Shu sat with her knees drawn up to her chest, the wine glass in her hand almost empty. She swirled the glass, unable to imagine that back then she hated him, and he didn't like her either; they were just forced together by self-interest.

"If we keep arguing, either you won't be able to stand me anymore, or I won't be able to keep up the act," she said casually.

"You've been pretending all along?"

“Isn’t that right of you? You don’t like my temper, you think I’m arrogant and domineering, and I have a lot of bad habits. You frowned but had to endure my expression. I still remember it all. What’s wrong with divorce? A wrong beginning can’t end wrong forever.”

Qiao Shu was deceived by the illusion before her and almost forgot how bad their relationship had been back then.

She made two mistakes in a row, like a stone thrown into a deep pool.

Yu Zeheng stared at her, his gaze deep and unfathomable. Whether it was from the alcohol or something else, his head began to throb: "Since you knew it was a mistake, why did you choose to start?"

"Why did you agree? You clearly don't like me. You're acting like you've been holding back. Weren't we both weighing the pros and cons before making this decision?"

Marriage isn't just her decision. Just because she approached him first, does that mean it's all her fault?

“Yu Zeheng, I didn’t force you to marry me back then, and I didn’t take a single extra penny from you after the divorce. I don’t owe you anything.”

Yes, they owe each other nothing.

This is what Qiao Shu told herself.

Yu Zeheng propped his head up with his hands, feeling tipsy. Watching her mouth open and close, he chuckled softly, "Your so-called 'no debt' means you got married on a whim, then divorced on a whim, and now I'm a divorced man, and if I remarry, I'm a second-time husband?"

"...So what if I'm remarried?" Qiao Shu frowned deeply, shocked that anyone would still care about such a thing.

Yu Zeheng pointed at her: "Your second marriage is your choice, and you should bear the consequences."

Qiao Shu chuckled as she smoothed her hair, her voice chuckling, "So you're innocent just because you're getting married again? You have absolutely no problems?"

"yes."

"Yu Zeheng, can't you be reasonable?"

Yu Zeheng's mind was in a daze, like a fog he couldn't clear. He listened to her long-winded explanation, which was all nonsense. Why was he trying to reason with her?

He tapped the table with his finger and uttered a soft "Oh," saying, "So you were trying to reason with me just now."

Qiao Shu was quick to anger. She didn't throw the rest of the wine in his face, which was a testament to her good temper. She sneered twice: "How many days have you stayed at home after getting married? To you, this marriage is dispensable. At most, you've just lost a woman you can legally sleep with."

Yu Zeheng frowned in displeasure: "Why do you have to think of me in such a terrible light?"

Qiao Shu twisted her neck, pursed her lips, and stubbornly insisted, "Then you should ask yourself why you give me this impression?"

"Who is being unreasonable?"

"Now you want to reason with me again?" Qiao Shu put down her wine glass, stood up, and arrogantly raised her chin. "What else do you want to say about me? That I'm selfish or unreasonable? You're right, that's the kind of woman I am. How I see you and how I view that marriage is my freedom, and it's none of your business."

"You know you're just making excuses. You can even appeal a court sentence. Qiao Shu, why are you so domineering?"

The fire in his chest seemed to be burning in his brain, making him somewhat dizzy with anger. He leaned on the table and said, "I am a terrible person, you've known that for a long time, haven't you?"

Qiao Shu bit her lip, her face pale. She went upstairs, wondering how a perfectly good meal had turned into this. She took a deep breath, knowing that today was destined to be a terrible day. She had a headache and felt feverish all over. All she wanted to do was cover her head and sleep, not wanting to care about anything else, and clean up the mess tomorrow.

Yu Zeheng was behind her. As she entered the bedroom, he grabbed her arm. She couldn't pull her hand away, so she clenched her fist and tried to punch him, but he grabbed her hand again. Her chest heaved violently. She glared at him hatefully and said, "Get out of here."

Seeing his things everywhere she looked, Qiao Shu was furious: "Take all your things away, get out of here, we have nothing to do with each other anymore."

"Let go."

Yu Zeheng let her kick and punch him, whether she hated him or resented him, he accepted it all. He called her name, but Qiao Shu was too angry to hear anything. He grabbed her arm, pulled her into his arms, and lowered his head to kiss her lips.

Qiao Shu opened her eyes wide and angrily tried to push him away, but he grabbed her neck and pressed her forward, forcefully prying open her teeth. His sucking force was so strong that it seemed like he wanted to swallow her whole. She choked on water and her face turned red. Due to the disparity in strength, she couldn't push him away and could only bite his lips.

She opened her mouth, giving him a chance. He entwined his tongue with hers, sucking so hard that even his teeth ached.

Bastard, Yu Zeheng is a complete bastard!

He hates her, doesn't like her, yet he kisses her and sleeps with her.

Are all men this shameless? As long as something comes to them, they'll sleep happily regardless of whether they like it or not.

As soon as their lips parted, Qiao Shu got a chance to catch her breath. Her eyes were glistening with tears, and her lips were red and swollen from the kiss. She was furious and clenched her fist, punching him in the chest.

"What right do you have... who gave you the audacity? I hate you!"

Yu Zeheng's voice was very low: "What do you hate?"

Qiao Shu felt a lump in her throat, the words of her wanting to curse stuck in her throat. She arrogantly and defiantly looked up at him.

"I remember clearly what you said two years ago. I will remember the look of disgust in your eyes for the rest of my life. You said I was heartless, extremely selfish, calculating, and ungrateful. You asked who would like me, someone like me. You were right, no one. So what? I can still live a good life."

She pursed her lips, as proud as ever.

Nobody likes her, that's okay, she'll always love herself.

Yu Zeheng was taken aback. He saw his own reflection in the glistening tears in her eyes. He tugged at his lips and said, "I really don't like you. How could I like you?"

“From the very first meeting, I knew you were two-faced and hypocritical. You came to me only to find a substitute. Even if I were stupid, I would know your motives were impure. I understood all of this clearly, yet I still married you. So, the end result is that I have to pay for my mistakes.”

"Whether you get married or divorced, you have your freedom. But have you ever thought about why you took the initiative to kiss me that night if you decided to get a divorce, as if everything would be different after that night? Have you thought about how I would feel when I see the divorce papers the next day?"

"It's not just you, Qiao Shu, who have emotions. I'm a person too, and I have feelings too. Whether I hate you, despise you, or resent you, that's fine. Otherwise, do you really think I would forgive and forget and play along with you if you came back two years later and talked about a win-win cooperation? Why did I agree to this? Why am I standing here now? Have you ever thought about why?"

Yu Zeheng was still holding her wrist, and her clenched fist slowly loosened as if releasing its strength.

So many questions came crashing down on her, leaving Qiao Shu stunned. She repeated his words, her voice so low it was almost a murmur: "Why?"

"I don't dislike you."

A bright light was flashing. She opened her lips, then closed them again. There was no dislike, a double negative. She breathed slowly, the word "like" rolling on her tongue.

Yu Zeheng stared into her eyes: "You know what I'm saying, Qiao Shu. No one can dislike you. How could anyone not like you?"

His voice was soft and low, a gentle murmur. He lowered his head, kissed her trembling eyelashes, and licked away the moisture from her eyes.

Then, a moist kiss traveled from the eyes to the bridge of the nose, to the tip of the nose, and finally to the lips.

Qiao Shu was processing some indescribable emotions. It was as if there was a spring in her chest, with fresh, cool water constantly gushing out, seeping into her blood vessels, flowing through her limbs and bones, and extinguishing the flame that had once flickered within her.

"I still hate you." She pressed her lips to his, her cheeks warm from his breath.

Beneath his palm lay her smooth skin. His fingers became a ruler, measuring her slenderness and curves. He didn't release her lips, maintaining a distance as he spoke, his voice hoarse: "I know."

Her soft whisper seemed to come from the depths of her being: "Why can't you do as I please?"

"Why have I never said those words?"

"Why, why are you such a bastard?"

"..."

Yu Zeheng opened his lips, swallowing not only the sweet taste of her lips and tongue, but also her repeated complaints, swallowing every single word.

Until Qiao Shu collapsed onto the soft bed, her voice changed into a single breathy sound, meaningless, only expressing a feeling of unbearable shame.

Yu Zeheng's large, well-defined hand pressed against her face, his fingers tracing her eyebrows, her eyelids and eyelashes, before pressing against her soft, warm lips. This face, which he both loved and hated, the face that had appeared in his memory a thousand times, he remembered every detail clearly, that light brown freckle, which he had kissed and licked with the tip of his tongue.

He closed his long eyelashes, his hand gently caressing her, a tender gesture that seemed like a false sense of security. He tightened his grip on her waist, wanting to fill the empty space in her chest, the cavity in her stomach... filling every crevice, bit by bit, like a storm, relentless until death.

Qiao Shu gripped his arm, closed her eyes, and tears wet her eyelashes.

She then realized that when a person is extremely happy, the dizziness in their brain is like fireworks exploding one after another. After the brief impact, there is a white blur and a long period of dizziness, making it impossible to know where you are.

Qiao Shu breathed, her body enveloped in rising heat, which gently soothed the soreness and discomfort within her.

"Xiao Shu".

Yu Zeheng cupped her face in his hands and rubbed his high, cool nose against hers: "Look at me."

Qiao Shu lifted her long eyelashes, and her gaze fell upon his high brow bones and dark eyes. When he looked at her, it was as if she were the focus of his entire world.

Yu Zeheng brushed aside the stray hairs on her forehead and said in an extremely serious tone, "Let's start over."

-----------------------

Author's Note: This is a double entendre, subtly revealing a personal motive.

50 red envelopes, goodnight everyone! *kissing sounds*