Chapter 29: Chaotic Daily Life [VIP]

342.

In such simple, peaceful and comfortable days, Jason was out there, pretending to be Bruce and traveling around the world with Bizarro.

The duo was a sight to behold: a hot-tempered, explosive stick cultivator and a massive Kryptonian clone with the mental capacity of a five-year-old.

On the road, he would kill any god that stood in his way, and any Buddha that stood in his way.

Bizarro always trailed Jason, occasionally thwarting sneak attacks. Whenever someone thought Jason looked young and easy to pick on, Bizarro would slap them away, jokingly saying, "Bad guy, don't pick on Jason."

Jason always felt that this was a team he had assembled, and the kids he had brought up, and he had a strange sense of indulgence towards Bizarro.

Hey, why are you scolding the kid when he's still so young? He's not sensible. You told him he wouldn't understand. He just broke your little brother's bones, but he's not dead. What are you yelling about? This is hilarious. If Bizarro wasn't so kind, you'd be one of them too!

Where on earth did Jason get these words from? His little mouth was like poison.

"You two really are like father and son," Dick couldn't help but tease during a video call. "Jason, when did you become so good at raising children?"

"Shut up, Dick." Jason rolled his eyes. "Bizarro is my teammate, not a kid."

"But," Bizarro, who was holding Jason's equipment box on the other side of the screen, waved happily at the camera, "Bizarro likes Xiaojie."

"...You shut up too." Jason held his forehead weakly. "Why should I answer this video call?"

Ah… Xiaojie, I feel (choked) so much maternal radiance…

343.

Jason and his "world-wide adventure father-son duo" gradually became a source of laughter for us after dinner. Every time he did something earth-shattering, Dick would be the first to laugh at him.

"You know what? Xiaojie won 15 consecutive matches in the Japanese Iaido dojo, and finally took away the opponent's treasure, but used it as food money." Dick shook the news clipping and smiled.

"Then Bizarro punched a hole in someone's wall, and this museum treasure wasn't even enough to compensate him." I added, "What a complete and splendid teamwork."

"I doubt they'll keep all that money for three days," Barbara remarked rudely.

"At least they didn't blow up the gym," Tim interjected, taking a leisurely sip from the coffee cup next to him, which had been replaced with milk. "That's progress."

"Tim, your standard of progress is so weird." I couldn't help but hold my forehead. "No normal person would blow up other people's gyms! Nor would they knock a big hole in a noodle shop just because they turned around."

Before I could finish my words, my communicator started beeping.

"Who?" I frowned and clicked it, and Jason's face appeared on the screen.

"You two seem to be having a good chat." He narrowed his eyes and said in a chilling tone, "Have you ever considered the feelings of the person involved?"

Just like we spy on Jason, Jason also spy on us from time to time. Oh... a little hairy problem of the Bat family, we are used to it.

"Of course we did," Dick interjected. "That's why we didn't mention what you did in Italy."

"Shut up, Dickie," Jason gritted his teeth. "Speak of that again and I'll beat you up."

"Alright, alright." Dick waved his hand with an "I get you" expression on his face. "But it's no wonder Clark told us about you. Who told you to lose someone else's child?"

"That was an accident!" Jason was furious. "He disappeared in the blink of an eye. I spent ages searching for him in the fossil area, clinging to a whole rock. If I had known he loved fossils so much, I could have dug up a ton of them in the hills behind our house!"

"Fossils...fossils." Tim repeated in a low voice, his shoulders shaking with laughter.

Jason angrily hung up the video call. Seriously, what's the point? We could just watch the live stream through the surveillance camera on him. What they did was enough to make a movie.

344.

In the evening, after the patrol, we gathered around the round table in the small restaurant to eat. The atmosphere was lively.

"Alfred, I think your salad could use a little more black pepper," Stephanie commented, raising her fork.

"Personally, I think the fried chicken Miss Stephanie ate during her night patrol was too salty, so she needed more black pepper," Alfu replied calmly. "But I'll keep your advice in mind, Miss Stephanie."

"Kashan, don't throw the dishes you don't want to eat to ACE. Make sure the nutrition is balanced." I pushed the plate back in front of her, watched her purse her lips quietly, and then lowered her head to eat seriously.

I turned to interrupt Dick and Tim's fight over the last lobster and took Stephanie's plate.

"Speaking of which," Barbara put down her cutlery and looked up at Bruce. "Ro called back? They're almost becoming urban legends."

Bruce was silent for a moment and took a sip of black tea.

"That will probably have to wait until Bizarro gets tired of traveling around the world and takes his last bite of soup," said the other.

"It's all right," I finished all the food in no time. "The child is grown up now and has his own ideas."

However, just as he finished speaking, the restaurant's communication screen suddenly lit up. Jason's figure appeared on the screen, looking exhausted. Behind him, Bizarro was happily eating from a large ice cream cup.

"Hey," Jason frowned at us, "Do you have time to take in some poor, stranded people?"

"Welcome home." Bruce calmly put down the teacup, his tone as calm as ever.

"I'm afraid Master Jason will have to wash the dishes himself when he comes back." Ah Fu added suddenly.

On the other side of the screen, Jason pulled Bizarro and made an OK gesture.

345.

On the first day of Jason's return, there was chaos in Wayne Manor.

"I'm back!" He kicked the door open so loudly that even the bat cave upstairs could hear it.

Oh my god, what on earth did Jason eat when he went out? He looks like my sister, 5'85" with eight-pack abs. Is he drinking protein powder like water?

Dick slowly closed his jaw and sadly ran to the kitchen to pour himself a bottle of milk.

"Are you planning on kicking down some doors?" I stood at the doorway, raising an eyebrow at him carrying two huge travel bags. "Did the doors provoke you?"

"Don't be so stingy." He raised an eyebrow, threw his luggage to the ground, and lay down on the sofa. "Finally home! That big guy Bizarro snores when he sleeps, and my ears are almost deafened."

"You talk as if you don't grind your teeth when you sleep." Tim stood at the stairs, holding a thick book on formations, his expression indifferent. "Besides, are you planning to leave your luggage here?"

Jason glanced at him sideways, "You're really nosy."

"Your luggage is blocking my way." Tim walked downstairs and put his books on the table. His feet accidentally knocked his bag to the side. "Welcome back, Jason."

"Why did you kick my bag?" Jason immediately jumped up from the sofa and glared at Tim. "There are antiques in it that I found in Egypt!"

"Don't worry, your precious antiques are fine." Tim pointed to the luggage, "But if you keep yelling like that, they might actually break."

"Can you guys be quiet?" Bruce's voice came from upstairs, low and a little tired. "I just slept for two hours."

"Bruce, it's already three in the afternoon!" Dick poked his head out of the kitchen with a piece of toast in his mouth. "You really should adjust your sleep schedule."

"Could you please keep your voices down?" Barbara came out of the study, frowning. "Kasan just fell asleep."

"Okay, okay, I'll listen to Barbara." Jason spread his hands and sat back on the sofa. "But I brought back a gift. Do you want to see it?"

346.

This sentence really worked, and everyone gathered together.

"Don't tell me it's a bunch of crowbars." Dick stared at Jason's luggage warily. "Last time you brought back a bunch of rusty stuff and told me you wanted to hold an exhibition. You even praised them as 'artworks'."

I know that. Jason kept them in the Batcave and gave each one a name.

Every time Kashan passed by there, he had to cover his ears because the noise made his head buzz.

The stick has the same hot temper as its owner.

"Don't worry, it's not like that this time." Jason proudly pulled out a bottle of wine from his bag. "This is a limited edition whiskey I found in Scotland. I'm sure you'll like it, Bruce."

"Minors are not allowed to drink." Bruce's voice came from upstairs again. Why didn't he come down to watch with us? Instead, he stood on the second floor and eavesdropped secretly.

"Bruce, I'm an adult!" Jason shouted, looking up, "And this bottle is for you!"

You are not an adult, Xiaojie. You are only 16 years old. Of course, if you want to say that you are an adult in Brazil, then I would say that you are American. Brazilian law cannot control American boys.

347.

"I only drink coffee and tea," Bruce responded.

Really? I don't believe it.

You drank a lot of alcohol at the party hosted by the Zhengy Alliance, and when you were having a good time, you even gave everyone $10,000.

This is Dick's pocket money for 2000 weeks!

Dick looked at me resentfully, and I looked back innocently.

Tim stared at me with a curious look on his face.

"Talk more, I love to listen." His eyes were conveying this message to me.

348.

"Then I'll give it to Ah Fu." Jason ignored our eye contact, shrugged, and handed the wine to Ah Fu who came in. "Here, Ah Fu, this is for you."

"Thank you, Master Jason." Ah Fu took it with a smile, "But I would be even happier if you could bring back some tea next time."

"Okay, definitely next time." Jason patted his chest and smiled brightly.

"So what is this?" I pointed curiously at a wooden box sticking out of his luggage bag.

"This is..." Jason's expression was a little subtle. He slowly took out the wooden box and opened it.

In the box lay a ring that looked quite historical, with delicate patterns engraved on the ring face, which looked like some kind of ancient rune.

Hiss, why do I feel like this thing looks a little familiar?

"I found this in France. It's said to be a relic from a certain dynasty," Jason explained with a hint of pride. "I heard wearing it can increase your strength."

"Sounds like a money-sucking gimmick," Tim complained mercilessly.

"No." Jason glared at him, then put the ring on his hand. "Look, I'm fine, aren't I?"

"Have you forgotten our family's 'fine tradition' regarding mysterious objects?" I held my chin. "Eight out of ten are cursed, and the remaining two will explode."

"Don't scare me." Jason waved his hand. "I had someone authenticate this specifically."

Before I could reply, his fingers began to glow.

349.

The entire living room fell into an eerie silence.

"...Oh my god, it really glows?" Jason looked down at his hands, his expression shifting from surprise to unease. "Uh, this isn't a bad omen, is it?"

"You'd better take it off quickly." Bruce's voice was frighteningly calm.

"I... I'll try!" Jason quickly used his other hand to pull the ring, but the ring seemed to be stuck to his hand and he couldn't pull it off no matter how hard he tried.

"Ah, that's it." Dick smirked. "Welcome home, Jason. This is the proper way to open Wayne Manor."

350.

"Shut up, Dickie Bird! Can't you come and help me?" Jason yelled at Dick, his hands still busy on the ring. But no matter how hard he tried, the ring didn't budge, and instead the light became brighter and brighter.

"Well, it looks like it's another 'lucky day' for our family." I rolled my eyes and spread my hands. "Fuku, prepare an emergency plan. And get the fire extinguisher out. This guy might explode if he's not careful."

"I understand, Miss Leona." Alfu turned around and left calmly, taking the toast from Dick's desk.

"Where's my toast?" Dick watched Jason's battle with the ring with great interest. When he felt around on the table and realized he wasn't touching anything, he looked up and wailed.

"Forget your toast, Dick, look at Jason's hand!" Barbara glared at him and pointed at the radiant ring.

"I don't think it's that pretty!" Jason yelled and jumped up and down. "What should I do? Why can't I take this thing off?!"

"Calm down, Jason." Bruce finally came down from upstairs. "Stand still. Let me take a look."

351.

He walked up to Jason, looked at the ring carefully, and his expression became increasingly solemn.

"It's a symbol I've never seen before," Bruce whispered. "It looks like antlers with branches extending out... but it's some kind of amplifier."

"Sounds cool." Jason tried to mask his nervousness with humor.

"But it could also be a dangerous unknown object," Bruce added coldly. "We have to take it down."

"Of course I know, old man! But it sticks so well!" Jason waved his hand, and the light from the ring almost blinded me.

"Don't move!" I quickly held his hand. "Do you want the whole manor to be lit up by you?"

"Dick, bring me my toolbox." Bruce pointed to the cabinet against the wall.

"Oh, here I come!" Dick ran back with the toolbox while complaining, "Why do I always have to run errands?"

Bruce pulled out a small laser knife and carefully approached Jason's hand.

"Slow down! Don't cut my hand off!" Jason gritted his teeth with a distorted expression.

"If you move again, I might actually cut it off." Bruce said unhappily.

Jason stood up straight instantly, like a little student about to be called on by the teacher.

Bruce used the laser knife to gently scratch the edge of the ring, but the ring seemed to have life, emitting a strong light that shocked everyone back a step.

"Uh... I think we might need more advanced methods." Tim frowned and crossed his arms. "For example, send it to the Wanjian Sect and let them study it?"

"Or just pack up Jason and send him to the Wanjian Sect," Dick said with a wicked smile. "Aren't they the best at researching these weird things?"

“Shut up, Dick!” Jason glared at him. “I really should have put that weird thing on you!”

"I don't want to be a flashlight," Dick shrugged.

"I suggest using sealing and suppression spells to try to suppress its energy first," Barbara suggested. "At least we can temporarily control its active state."

"That's a good idea." I nodded. "Jason, hold out your hand. Let me try."

"I don't believe you can do it." Jason muttered softly, but still stretched out his hand obediently.

I casually drew a cooling spell and slapped it on his hand. The light from the ring instantly dimmed a lot. Although it didn't go out completely, it was at least no longer as dazzling.

"Okay, this is finally not so dazzling." Jason breathed a sigh of relief, but his expression was still a little uneasy.

352.

"But this is just a temporary solution," I reminded him, "You'd better go to the Wanjian Sect and get to the bottom of this matter."

"Oh my God!" Jason wailed, "I don't want to be sliced ​​up like a test subject!"

"Don't worry, you spent half a year there studying calligraphy, so you should know that the Wanjian Sect is a thoroughly decent sect." Tim spread his hands. "It's just that you might encounter some fanatical weapon cultivators who shamelessly cling to you and want to study the ring on your hand."

"Stop talking nonsense." Bruce patted Jason's shoulder, "You'll set off early tomorrow morning."

Jason opened his mouth, but could only say angrily, "You heartless people, you actually want to send me away as a test subject!"

"Go soon and come back soon." I waved at him with a bright smile on my face, "Don't worry, we will miss you."

"No, I can't," Tim added, almost getting hit by Jason's pillow.

353.

The morning after Jason left, the manor was unusually quiet. Everyone was busy with their own things, but without Jason's voice, it felt a little strange.

"Finally, it's quiet." Dick slumped down on the sofa and reached for the newspaper on the table. "Without Jason's loud voice, this place feels like heaven."

"Heaven doesn't welcome people like you who always snatch newspapers. If you don't even read them, then don't take up public resources." I snatched the newspaper from him and flipped open the pages to read Bruce's gossip. "But then again, I'm a little uncomfortable. His yelling in the living room yesterday is still ringing in my ears."

"That's your illusion." Tim sat aside, holding his laptop, typing away at the keyboard without even looking up. "I think this is great. It helps everyone focus better."

Really? Xiaoti. I know you two had a long conversation in the same room for three hours last night.

Tim's fingers tapping on the keyboard paused for a moment, and he looked at me dimly.

I gave him my perfect big sister smile.

Tim lowered his head and continued to fight for the Wayne Group and the future of the Wayne family.

Xiaojie has a good vision. Before leaving, he remembered to bring back a trust for us. Now Bruce no longer has to worry about how to make money while pretending to be stupid. Elite Young Master Timmy will solve his troubles.

He also helps me write the law enforcement team log. He is so useful!

354.

"What a shame." Stephanie walked in with a cup of bubble tea and said regretfully, "I was planning on having Jason accompany me to the Gotham Food Festival today. He said last time he wanted to take me to eat fried cheese balls."

"You actually believed his food recommendations?" Dick looked up, his face incredulous. "Last time, he insisted that grilled bananas with chili powder were delicious, and it made me poop all day."

"Don't mention it. That was the darkest meal of my life." Tim empathetically clutched his stomach. "Jason's palate is definitely not human."

"But he has a kind heart." Barbara came out of the study. "At least he's willing to take you to try new things."

"He may be kind, but his views on food are definitely a threat." I rolled my eyes. "When he comes back, I'll have Ah Fu force him to take a class on 'normal eating'."

While we were chatting, Bruce came up from the Batcave and said, "Jason has arrived at the Wanjian Sect and has started checking on the ring."

"So soon?" I raised an eyebrow. "He didn't want to leave without the Batcave device?"

"Uh-huh, no." Bruce's tone was filled with hidden pride. "But he sent me a message saying that the people over there are very interested in this ring and it might take a few days to study it."

Oh, are you bragging about Jason only messaging you? That's because we have tons of random little groups that don't include Batman (emphasis added).

You know we know, and we know you know, but we all pretend not to know.

This is the Dark Forest Law.

"I hope they don't come up with anything incredible." Tim sighed. "The last time the Wanjian Sect sent us a psychic mirror, it almost turned the manor into a haunted house."

"That was a thrill," Stephanie said with a grin. "I still remember Tim chasing ghosts with a broom. It was hilarious!"

"That's a makeshift weapon!" Tim retorted immediately, "Besides, I'm not chasing a ghost, I'm driving it out!"

"Okay, Tim the Exorcist." I patted his shoulder, trying not to laugh. "Let's just make do with this until Jason comes back."

"Hopefully, things will be a little quieter these few days." Bruce looked at us and went back to the bedroom. "Remember, don't cause any more trouble."

We were all silent for a second, then we collectively laughed out loud.

"Well, I bet the manor will be back to its normal noisy state in five minutes." Dick said with a smile, "After all, with you guys here, silence is impossible."

"Only five minutes? That's too much of an insult to them." I raised an eyebrow. "Three minutes, believe it or not?"

"Oh, let's make a bet." Stephanie joined the battle enthusiastically. "I bet two minutes!"

"You're challenging fate." Tim shook his head helplessly, "But... okay, I'll bet for two minutes too."

Just as we were having a heated discussion, there was a loud noise from the kitchen, followed by Ah Fu's helpless sigh.

"Look." Dick spread his hands. "It's not even two minutes yet."

Stephanie immediately raised her hands and cheered: "I win!"

355.

"What happened in the kitchen?" Dick was the first to stand up, his tone mixed with curiosity and gloating.

"Could it be one of you trying to microwave eggs again?" I followed him into the kitchen, already imagining a series of Gotham disaster scenes.

"It's not us!" Tim's voice came from behind. He walked while looking at the monitoring screen on his watch. "It might be Kashan. She just came back from the psychic class and is probably trying out new skills."

When we pushed open the kitchen door, we saw a mess - there was an unknown liquid on the ceiling, a translucent stone on the table was emitting a faint light, and Kashan was standing in the middle of the kitchen, holding a steaming pot lid with an innocent look on her face.

"What...is this?" Dick pointed at the strange stone, trying to understand the scene before him.

"A psychic experiment," Kashan said calmly, lowering the lid of the pot to reveal a completely burnt apple pie. "Afu said everyone has their own way of cooking. For someone like me, I can try to make friends with food."

Ah Fu stood in the corner, wiping cloth in hand, holding his forehead with a tired look. "I did say that, but what I meant was to focus on nutrition and understand nutritional balance, not... performing some kind of disrespectful ritual using baked apple pie."

"It's pretty cool that this stone glows, though." Stephanie squatted down and carefully observed the slightly trembling stone. "Is it dancing?"

"Touching it is not recommended," Tim warned cautiously. "It might have some kind of energy reaction. After all, this is something we brought back from Wanxiang Academy."

"It certainly can't be placed in the kitchen," I concluded decisively. "Cassan, take it to the laboratory in the Batcave, and remember not to use it to get close to food in the future."

Kasan nodded, carefully picked up the stone and left the kitchen, and we started cleaning up the aftermath together.

356.

"When Jason comes back, he'll definitely regret missing this wonderful show." Dick sighed as he wiped the stove. "After all, he really enjoys watching us running around like headless chickens."

How dare you assume he wasn't peeking through the security cameras, Dick?

"I hope he comes back with some good news." Stephanie opened the window to ventilate. "We can't keep encountering these weird things."

It's hard to say.