Chapter 139 Good News 4 It felt as if a huge hole had been torn open in my heart.

Chen Fengnian's palm trembled slightly, and the hairpin seemed to come alive as well, quivering gently.

"The Third Young Master refused to return, insisting on staying in the northern desert to continue searching for the Seventh Prince's whereabouts. I had no choice but to lead the army back to the capital to report for duty."

Chen Fengnian extended his hand to Cui Ying and said in a hoarse voice, "Third Miss, please accept this item."

Cui Ying's eyes were empty, and her hand rose stiffly like a marionette as she slowly picked up the hairpin.

The rough texture of the hairpin pressed against her fingertips, and the dark red bloodstains on it seemed to still retain warmth, burning her fingertips.

Her hand gripping the hairpin tightened to its limit. She slowly raised her head, a bright smile tugging at her pale face, her tone tinged with helplessness: "Alright, Lord Chen, I've heard what you have to say, and I believe it. Now, shouldn't we let Xiao Qiyu out?"

Chen Fengnian was stunned: "Third Miss, what...what are you saying?"

"Alright, alright," Cui Ying waved her hand, her tone even carrying a hint of comfort, as if Chen Fengnian was the one who hadn't figured it out. "I understand, it must have been that bastard Xiao Qiyu's idea. He made you say that on purpose to scare me, to see me cry and make a scene, didn't he? I believe you, I admit defeat, okay? Once you've had your fun, tell him to come out quickly. In this sweltering heat, I don't have the mind to play games with you guys here."

The shadows of the trees swayed on the ground, casting large patches of shade, a mixture of light and shadow.

As Cui Ying spoke, she stopped looking at Chen Fengnian's anxious face, turned around, and stared at the endless army.

"Forget it, I'll find him myself. He's probably changed into the same clothes as everyone else and is deliberately hiding inside waiting for me to find him."

She muttered to herself and walked towards the swarm of soldiers.

The sun was scorching, dust was flying everywhere, and the military songs had stopped sometime earlier, leaving only a depressing silence all around.

Facing countless gazes directed at her, Cui Ying shouted arrogantly, "Xiao Qiyu! Come out here!"

"I know you're teasing me on purpose. I give up, okay? Just come out here right now!"

"Xiao Qiyu! Come out! Come home with me!"

Cui Ying's gaze swept across the unfamiliar faces, scrutinizing them meticulously, not missing a single similar feature.

"No...no..."

"This isn't either..."

She felt as if she were in a giant maze, where the only exit might appear in the next instant, or it might never appear.

"Xiao Qiyu, stop hiding, I can see you!"

Cui Ying pushed through the crowd, ignoring the pitying stares. Under the blazing sun, her face was devoid of sweat, though her complexion was deathly pale, and a forced, relaxed smile clung to her lips.

"Xiao Qiyu, you bastard! If you don't come out, I'm really going to get angry with you!" Cui Ying even prepared to threaten, "I'll count to three, one, two..."

Chen Fengnian caught up, panicked: "Third Miss! Qilang is really gone! I'm not lying to you! Wake up!"

Cui Ying's eyes narrowed, her steps halted abruptly, and she turned to stare intently at Chen Fengnian. Her once clear and bright amber pupils were now devoid of any light as she calmly asked, "Why should you just disappear like that?"

“Xiao Qiyu is my husband. I want to see him alive or dead, not just hearsay that he’s disappeared and I have to accept my fate. Lord Chen, how long have you known Xiao Qiyu? Is it as long as I have? I’ve known him since I was four years old. Do you think I believe you or Xiao Qiyu? Let me tell you, I don’t believe he was blown away by some damned Rakshasa wind. That’s not Xiao Qiyu’s fate. He saved so many people; he’s destined to live to be a hundred. I don’t believe a single word you say. I only know that you’re definitely conspiring with him to deceive me.”

As if to prove that his own words were true, Cui Ying stopped searching for the figure in her memory and instead used all her strength to shout at the top of her lungs in front of the thousands of people in the dark: "Xiao Qiyu! Get out here! Get out here!"

The girl's angry voice echoed along the long official road, startling birds into flight with mournful cries, and the mountains and rivers fell silent.

"Didn't you say you would definitely come back alive? Didn't you say you wouldn't let me remarry?!"

Under the vast sky, Cui Ying's blood surged with the roar, turning her skin and eyes red. Crimson flames burned in her eyes, and overwhelming pain grew like wild grass.

"Let me tell you, I, Cui Ying, won't fall for your trick so easily! I—"

Before Cui Ying could shout out another word, a metallic taste suddenly welled up in his throat, and all his strength seemed to be drained away. Suddenly, the world spun before his eyes, and everything around him became distorted and blackened.

"Third Sister!"

She heard Chen Fengnian's terrified shouts, but Cui Ying felt that the sound was very, very far away, as if separated by thousands of mountains. She found that her body had become very light, as light as a feather. At this moment, snowflakes began to fall from the sky, a vast expanse of white, without any luster.

She couldn't feel her body, only her hands desperately gripping the blood-stained wooden hairpin, her lips murmuring, "Xiao Qiyu...come out..."

...

When Cui Ying woke up again, she was surrounded by many people.

There were three aunts, Xiao Shu, and Cui Jin with red eyes and a face full of self-reproach.

Upon seeing her awake, Xiao Shu rushed to the bedside first, her eyes swollen like peaches, and cried, "Third Sister, you're awake? Are you feeling better? You must calm down. Seventh Brother... Seventh Brother is only missing now, which doesn't mean anything. Maybe they've already found him, but the news is slow and hasn't reached the capital yet."

Cui Ying's mind was blank; she had almost forgotten who she was. Only after hearing Xiao Shu's words did a dense, persistent pain slowly sprout from her heart, and the memories before she fainted surged back like a tidal wave.

“You all knew all along,” Cui Ying said, emphasizing each word.

Xiao Shu lowered her head in a panic, not daring to look into Cui Ying's eyes.

It felt as if a huge hole had been torn open in my heart, and a biting cold wind howled through it, causing my internal organs to feel as if they had fallen into an ice cave.

"You knew all along! Why didn't you tell me!"

Cui Ying suddenly stood up, shouting like a madman, her eyes bloodshot, displaying a frenzy she had never shown before: "Why did you hide it from me! Why!"

This was the first time Xiao Shu had seen Cui Ying like this. It was as if the bright and flamboyant woman had died the moment she received the news. Tears welled up in her eyes, and she stammered, "Third Sister, no, we didn't mean to hide it from you. We were just afraid of you..."

Cui Ying was breathing heavily, her vision blurring, and she let out a cold laugh: "What are you afraid of? Are you afraid I can't take it? Are you afraid I'll end up like this?"

Her chest heaved, and she had a thousand more hurtful words to vent. She was in so much pain that she no longer cared about hurting innocent people. She needed to vent, she had to vent, or she would die immediately.

But when Cui Ying saw Xiao Shu's terrified, tearful face and the worried, self-reproachful expressions of her three aunts, her destructive impulse vanished like hitting cotton, leaving her with nowhere to put her strength, only boundless despair and exhaustion.

Cui Ying had no strength left. Her body stiffened and she slowly fell back onto the couch, closing her eyes.

"Huixin, I'm sorry, I didn't mean to yell at you," Cui Ying's voice was full of exhaustion. These few words had used up all her strength. "Take everyone out. I just want to be alone."

Xiao Shu's face was streaked with tears. She opened her mouth as if to say something, but Qin Shi beside her gently pulled her back and shook her head.

The group silently withdrew and gently closed the door.

The room fell completely silent.

Two lines of tears slowly dripped down Cui Ying's cheeks, seeping into her hair and leaving only two cold streaks.

Outside the window, the sun and moon alternate, and time flies by like an arrow.

Cui Ying lay there for three days and three nights, motionless, without eating or drinking.

She felt neither hungry nor thirsty, and the food on the table went from warm to cold without her even glancing at it.

Or rather, they didn't have the energy to even glance at it.

Cui Ying couldn't move even a single finger.

It felt like a huge block of ice was pressing on her chest, cold and heavy, pressing down on her chest so tightly that she could hardly breathe. Every breath required all her strength, and even then, she still felt breathless and almost suffocated.

She could recall every moment she spent with Xiao Qiyu and have a good cry, just like any woman who has lost her husband. But now she was like a lifeless stone, her mind dead, unable to function at all. She really wanted to cry, but her tears seemed to have already dried up. Her eyes were only burning with pain, dry and as if being torn apart.

At this moment, Cui Ying was nothing more than a corpse that was still breathing.

On the evening of the fourth day, the door was gently pushed open, and the Grand Princess walked in.

Having lived through four dynasties and weathered countless storms in his life, the old man's brows now bore an unmistakable weariness.

The eldest princess sat down by the bedside, not offering urgent advice like the others, but simply gently holding Cui Ying's cold hand.

"Third Sister, Seventh Brother is loyal to the country. Whether he can come back or not, his name will be engraved in the Book of Meritorious Officials and will be admired by future generations. He has not left you. On the contrary, he will be by your side in the future. He is everywhere. His life will be much longer than yours."

"Grandma knows you're in pain, but that's precisely why you must let him go. There's plenty of time ahead, and nothing is insurmountable. Only by letting go of him and forgiving yourself can you live up to his love and care, and move forward with the memories of him."

The sound dissipated into the long silence, like dust settling on the ground, without causing the slightest ripple.

The eldest princess sighed, still holding her granddaughter's hand, and silently wiped away her tears.

The shimmering light of the setting sun slowly receded from the tent, rippling and flowing like water.

Cui Ying spoke, her voice hoarse: "Grandmother..."

The eldest princess paused slightly, holding her hand, and exclaimed excitedly, "My little one, you've finally spoken?"

Looking at the vibrant plumage of the mandarin ducks on the tent ceiling, their necks intertwined, having gone without food or water for four days, Cui Ying's voice was weak and strained as she spoke: "You were the ones who forced us together back then, and now you're the ones advising me to let go and look forward..."

"This is not fair."

After she finished speaking, she remained silent for a long time, so long that the princess thought she would never speak again.

The night before he left... he asked me if I liked him.

Cui Ying's voice trembled, and her breathing suddenly became difficult. She had to open her mouth wide to barely maintain her breath. She spoke with difficulty: "I didn't say it because I knew that if I did, he wouldn't be able to leave. I didn't want him to hesitate because of me."

Cui Ying smiled and said, "In fact, for the past year, I have been glad about my decision and felt that I did the right thing."

A hot tear slid down Cui Ying's cheek. Her voice suddenly became forceful, as if tearing her heart apart, each word uttered with despair: "But now, every time I think about it, I feel my heart being torn apart!"

Cui Ying turned to look at the eldest princess, her usually bright and lively almond-shaped eyes now filled with endless pain and sorrow, and said firmly:

“Grandmother, I love him. I can’t let him go, not even if it kills me.”

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Author's Note: We'll meet in the chapter after next! (Singing) I pray that heaven and earth will spare this couple!