Alternative Title: 都穿越了，誰嫁紈絝啊？
Author: 藕泥漿
Status: Completed
Added: 12 hours ago
Updated: 12 hours ago
Good news, everyone! The eldest young lady of the Lin household just kicked the bucket!
Lin Mansion's concubine: "Heh, finally got rid of that idiot."
When the news of her death reached the Wen Mansion, Duke Wen secretly breathed a sigh of relief: "Should I still write the annulment letter?" Wen Zhixu put down his brush.
[I've never met Miss Lin; if we rashly marry…] Duke Wen: "Since the person is gone, let's not disturb them anymore."
The Lin Mansion funeral was utterly silent. Next door, the Wen Mansion suddenly exploded with firecrackers, as if celebrating. The maid was indignant: "Miss just left, and they actually…"
Before she finished speaking, the corpse, not yet dressed in burial clothes, suddenly opened its eyes! The maid screamed: "It's a zombie!"
Lin Xihe, a social animal, exhausted all her energy and worked herself to death. She opened her eyes to find herself transmigrated as the eldest young lady of the Lin Mansion.
Unfortunately, the original owner was an idiot. Lin Xihe struggled: "This problem is beyond my scope; I don't know how to pretend to be an idiot! Fine, then I'll cause trouble."
One day she transmigrated, and this "beast of burden" felt spiritually invigorated. On the first day of regaining her consciousness:
The private tutor shook his head and recited: "Laozi said: In the utmost state of governance, neighboring countries gaze upon each other, and the sounds of chickens and dogs are heard… Does anyone understand its meaning?"
Lin Xihe scoffed while chewing on a straw: "Tch, isn't the translation simple?" The tutor, enraged, asked: "Who's making noise?"
The girl, dressed in burial clothes, poked her head in: "I said: Cluck-cluck, woof-woof, oink-oink…" "Nonsense! Utter nonsense!" The tutor fainted on the spot.
Wen Zhixu, huddled in the corner, asked: "Who is that madwoman?" His young servant replied: "Young master, she seems to be your future wife." Wen Zhixu: ?!
On the tenth day of regaining her consciousness:
The two coincidentally bumped into each other at the entrance of Yuling Courtyard. "Oh, it's only 戌时 (7-9 PM) and you're already done?" Lin Xihe raised an eyebrow while sizing him up. "So young… how about I send you some deer antler to supplement your energy?"
The next day, the Duke Wen Mansion received a whole cart full of tonics. The Duke was furious, clutching his chest, and grabbed his grandson: "This madwoman is clinging to you, are you going to marry her or not?"
Wen Zhixu's eyes glinted playfully: "An eye for an eye, isn't it? Just be crazier than her until she voluntarily calls off the engagement."
The melon seeds at the capital's fried goods stall sold like crazy – everyone in the city was indulging! They sympathized with the young master, who was matched with a crazy woman!
And pitied the young lady, for wherever there was excitement – cockfighting, dog racing, gambling dens, taverns – you'd find her fiancé. Months later, at Lin Xihe's birthday banquet.
Wen Zhixu hid the jade hairpin he personally carved in his sleeve, not daring to meet her bright, clear eyes: "You like summer. The eighth day of the sixth month is an auspicious day, how about our wedding…?"
"I agree to annul the engagement!" Lin Xihe cheerfully handed him the annulment letter: "You wrote this back then, didn't you? Although it's a feudal society, we must bravely break arranged marriages! Your thinking is quite advanced!"
Wen Zhixu: "…"
Lin Xihe: I've transmigrated, who'd marry a fop? [Bonus Mini-Theater] Lin Xihe: What kind of young lord? In our modern times, you'd be called a "punk"!
Wen Zhixu: Modern… what dynasty is that? Lin Xihe: It's impossible to explain to you ancient folks! I transmigrated to ancient times not to compete, but to lie flat!
Modern person smashes ancient punk. This is a fictional history, with personal settings that wrap around the earth a full circle!