Chapter 99 Just kick me out. Actually, it's not that, it's just bad luck...

When Li Leshan entered, he brought with him a blast of cold air, which was instantly replaced by the warmth of the internet cafe. There weren't many people there at this time; it only got crowded on holidays or weekends. Although minors weren't allowed in internet cafes, back then nobody cared. As long as it wasn't particularly obvious—like eleven or twelve-year-olds—otherwise, people would turn a blind eye.

"School's out?" Liu Yang asked.

Li Leshan nodded and took off his schoolbag.

"I got out of school a little late today," Liu Yang said. He usually arrives at the school at 10 o'clock sharp, but he was half an hour late today.

"He's been kept in the classroom." Li Leshan hurriedly wrote three words on the paper.

“Oh,” Liu Yang raised an eyebrow, “that’s really something.”

He followed behind Li Leshan, who was tidying up in front. He didn't throw away the leftover instant noodles on this table, and he ate sunflower seeds all over the floor on that table. Actually, this was not Li Leshan's job, but Li Leshan felt that Liu Yang was very good to him, so he did whatever he could.

It was quite unusual for someone to stay after class, especially for Li Leshan; it was practically unheard of. Just before class ended, Zhang Fang called him to her office for a 15-minute talk. She said she felt Li Leshan's motivation for studying had been lacking lately, and several other teachers had commented that he often spaced out in class. In short, she asked him if he had any difficulties lately.

Li Leshan shook his head. He definitely wouldn't tell anyone about the mess at home, nor could he.

"Honestly, you're pushing yourself too hard," Liu Yang said, following behind him. "What year are you in high school? Second year?"

"You're a junior in high school, right? You'll be a senior next year. Will you still come?" Liu Yang asked.

Li Leshan paused briefly as he packed his things, then gently shook his head.

His shaking his head didn't mean he refused, but rather that he didn't know. He didn't know what would happen next.

Perhaps Li Yong would take pity on him and leave. Thinking of this, Li Leshan felt a little self-deprecating. He really had no way to deal with Li Yong. All he could do was hide and hope that Li Yong would leave on his own.

Ten years have passed, and he remains no different from his weak self. He hasn't grown up, nor has he become any stronger. He desperately tries to escape Li Yong's shadow, but ten years later, he still hasn't broken free from it.

Was that shadow going to trap him for the rest of his life? Thinking of this, Li Leshan's hands tightened.

lifetime……

Throughout his life, some people wanted to trap him; others wanted to protect him. His life has certainly been quite "exciting."

Liu Yang was about to say something about why this person wasn't saying anything, but seeing him constantly busy with his hands, he felt he was disturbing him, so he didn't try to persuade him anymore and turned back to the card room.

Some people can withstand persuasion, while others cannot. He had never met anyone as stubborn as Li Leshan before. This man seemed to have his own set of survival rules, and he seemed to carry a heavy burden. Liu Yang watched his retreating figure again and again, always feeling that the figure was lonely and forlorn.

"Damn, I can't stand this place any longer." Liu Yang felt that if he inhaled any more secondhand smoke, he would die instantly. Besides, the luck of these guys was terrible; he hadn't won a single game in the hour or two he had been sitting here.

"I'm going out for some fresh air," Liu Yang said.

"Let your junior employee cover your shift," the blond-haired guy next to him laughed.

"No thanks, that kid's too lucky." Curly clicked his tongue.

"Come on, do you think people are as idle as you guys?" Liu Yang rolled his eyes and walked outside.

It was 2:30 a.m. when Li Leshan fell asleep on the table. There were several sets of test papers next to him, all of which were densely covered with writing.

There were all sorts of practice tests: advanced tests, intensive tests, mock tests... Liu Yang flipped through one or two, his gaze lingering on the exposed hands. Compared to the well-defined knuckles of his palms, the scabbed wounds on them were even more striking.

"What the heck?" Liu Yang wondered. "Can you bleed while doing math problems?"

The more he looked at the wounds, the more they seemed to be from a fight. But thinking about it carefully, could Li Leshan be that kind of person? If he were, then it would be truly unbelievable.

Full of doubt, Liu Yang took out a strip of band-aids from the drawer and gently placed it next to Li Leshan.

The internet cafe's conditions were indeed not very good; there wasn't even a decent place to sleep. Actually, there were sofas further inside and makeshift beds on the second floor, but Li Leshan didn't want to sleep there, even though Liu Yang had told him several times. He would spend a few hours sleeping in front of this cold computer desk every day, and that would be the end of the day.

Li Leshan woke up at 4:30 a.m. after only a short time, unable to fall back asleep. In fact, he hadn't been able to sleep well for a long time, constantly waking up in terror from nightmares. This was the power of fear, consuming Li Leshan completely, even his dreams.

His arm was a little numb from being pressed down. He got up and looked around. Most people were already asleep, in similar positions to him. A few people were playing games in front of their computers, having lost track of time.

Li Leshan washed his face at the sink in the restroom. The cold water stimulated his senses the moment it touched his skin, making him feel much more awake.

Liu Yang and his friends were a bunch of night owls, living on American time. They slept during the day and played cards at night, living a carefree life with no one to bother them. After failing to study in junior and senior high school, their families abandoned them. They didn't go to university and spent a few years trying their luck in the south, unexpectedly catching a trend and making a fortune. After returning to Shengping, they opened a small internet cafe, had a stable customer base, and lived a relatively comfortable life.

"Going to the toilet?" Liu Yang looked up at him.

Li Leshan shook his head, "I'm not going to sleep."

He finally managed to understand one sentence and was a little surprised, "You only slept for a few hours? Don't you have class tomorrow? Be careful you don't fall asleep in class and get detention again."

Li Leshan leaned against the wall, silently thinking: Staying in the office won't interfere with my work.

Furthermore, he doesn't sleep during class.

He returned to his seat and sat obediently, waiting to leave the internet cafe for school at 6:20. He was free at this time, but for some reason he didn't want to do his homework, so he just lowered his head and spaced out.

"Why don't you take a nap or go upstairs to get some sleep?" Liu Yang approached him and subconsciously offered him a cigarette to help him wake up.

Well.

The two men stared at the cigarette, looking at each other in bewilderment.

"Never mind if I didn't hand it over." Liu Yang quickly took it back. He didn't want to lead the students astray. If Liu Qi or Li Leshan's girlfriend found out, they would definitely come after him. He wasn't that kind of person.

Li Leshan did not accept it. Instead, he took a pen and wrote a line on a piece of paper: What does it feel like to smoke?

After thinking for a while, Liu Yang realized that he was actually seriously considering it, and quickly dismissed the idea.

"What do you want to do? Minors aren't allowed to smoke," Liu Yang said sternly.

Li Leshan was clearly not intimidated by his expression. He simply added casually, "Were you an adult back then?"

Liu Yang was taken aback; he really didn't. This kid's pretty good at judging people.

"Mind your own business," Liu Yang finally said after a long pause. "You're still young, and it won't work when you're older. Smoking this is no good; it's harmful to your health and a waste of money."

His words were particularly unconvincing. Liu Yang, of course, knew this too; just looking at Li Leshan's speechless expression, he could only stammer as he stuffed the cigarette into his pocket, "I'll quit another day..."

"When is 'another day'?" Li Leshan thought to himself, "It certainly won't be tomorrow."

"Where did you get that injury on your hand?" Liu Yang changed the subject.

Li Leshan looked down and saw several bright red bloodstains on his knuckles, probably because the scars had reopened when he washed his hands.

“It’s scratched,” Li Leshan wrote.

"What happened? Was it during work?" Liu Yang asked hurriedly.

"No." Li Leshan wrote one word and didn't explain further. There was no point in saying more, and he also felt tired from writing all the time. Looking back now, the only time he felt relaxed was when he was communicating with Jiang Yueming.

The cut on his hand was from shards of a beer bottle; his hand was pinned tightly to the broken glass on the floor, unable to break free. Thinking of this, Li Leshan lowered his hand, blocking Liu Yang's view.

"There are band-aids on the table. Put one on if you're alright." Seeing that he didn't want to talk, Liu Yang didn't ask any more questions.

Looking at the bloodshot eyes in Li Leshan's eyes, and remembering that he went to school for half a day and worked for half a day at night, he couldn't help but ask, "Is there no one at your home?"

"No one takes care of you, no one looks after you?"

They just watch you, such a young child, doing this and that, and do nothing about it? Where's your mother? Where's your father? Where are your relatives and friends? Don't they care about you at all? Don't they even ask how you are doing?

Li Leshan pursed his lips, remained silent for a long time, and then wrote on the paper: You asked a bit too many questions.

"I don't think I asked that many questions," Liu Yang said. He wanted to ask more than that, but he knew that Li Leshan wouldn't answer even if he asked, so he kept it to himself and didn't ask.

"If you don't want to talk about it, then forget it." He wasn't that curious, nor did he want to pry, much less investigate. Even if he offered to help, he would probably be refused. Perhaps that's how sixteen or seventeen-year-olds are—their pride is so strong that they're unwilling to accept any "charity," even though Liu Yang didn't consider these things "charity."

"I just feel... it's quite difficult." Liu Yang was silent for a while.

Li Leshan was taken aback. He didn't look up at Liu Yang, but just silently pressed his knuckles.

"It's a bit difficult," Li Leshan thought to himself.

Actually, no, it's just that I'm unlucky.

Li Leshan lived a more enlightened life than anyone else. People often said that although he was young, he always acted like a child. He carried more burdens than the average person. While other children sought comfort from their parents, Li Leshan had to start thinking about how to escape from Li Yong.

He lost his voice in an accident when he was four, his mother passed away when he was six, and he returned to Shengping with his grandmother when he was eight... He used to think it was his own problem, until one late night, he suddenly realized that it was his fate. Even his disbelief in fate was all predetermined.

"I'm sorry," Liu Yang said, seeing his increasingly serious expression, realizing he had said the wrong thing. "I did ask a lot of questions and put you in a difficult position."

Li Leshan suddenly looked up. He knew that Liu Yang was concerned about him, and perhaps even felt indignant on his behalf. However, Li Leshan didn't know how to respond or what to say about all of this. He had never thought of telling anyone else.

Do we have to dissect his past little by little and show others how embarrassing and ironic it is?

There's no need, and it's really unnecessary. No one would want to listen to his complaints. Those things can't be expressed through sign language or writing. How much effort must he put into writing to convey the emotions that have lasted for ten years?

He should just be an aloof person, do his job well, and not cause trouble or put others in a difficult position. As for who cares about whom and who doesn't, he shouldn't concern himself with anything else.

Li Leshan's heart suddenly ached violently, so much so that his fingertips dug into his palms and slowly turned white. Trembling, he pulled his phone out of his pocket; the wallpaper was still a photo of him and Jiang Yueming. This was his rare solace, his medicine during those difficult days.

He slowly typed on the keyboard, deleting and rewriting, from "take care of me" to "can you take care of me?", and finally he deleted them all, leaving only "I miss you".

Staring at the three words on the screen, Li Leshan finally breathed a sigh of relief. He felt that he could answer Liu Yang's question. He still had family. His family included his grandmother and Yueming. There were people who would take care of him and people who were willing to look after him.

/

"Lele!" Jiang Yueming waved frantically at Li Leshan, who was standing at the school gate, "Lele!"

Upon recognizing the person, Li Leshan quickened his pace. "Why are you here?"

Jiang Yueming chuckled, a slightly silly laugh, "Didn't you say you missed me, so I came?"

"My phone died, otherwise I would have seen it a long time ago." Jiang Yueming hurriedly handed over the pie in her hand. "When I saw it this afternoon, I was so scared that I almost skipped class, worried that something had happened to you."

“I’m fine,” Li Leshan said, not taking the food and letting him eat it himself. “Can’t I think of you sometimes?”

"Yes, yes, yes!" Jiang Yueming quickly replied, "I wish you would think of me more."

“I’ve already eaten, I really have.” Jiang Yueming insisted on handing over the pie. “I haven’t missed a single meal of the day, and Cui Cui even makes me a midnight snack, so that’s four meals a day. Did you eat dinner…?”

"If you don't want to eat it anymore, you don't need to buy it for me." Li Leshan had no choice but to accept it.

"No, how can I show you I like you?" he said logically. "How can I show you I want to be good to you?"

"I heard from Xu Qing that a new cake shop opened near your school. She said it's really delicious, but since you don't like sweets, I didn't buy any," Jiang Yueming rambled on.

“You don’t even eat birthday cake much,” Jiang Yueming continued, indicating that he really didn’t like it.

Han Jiang would be very puzzled if he knew this. He is a complete sweet tooth and would kill anyone who dares to disobey him. Of course, he is not that ruthless.

“I’m not used to eating sweets.” Li Leshan said in sign language.

He's not used to eating cake; he hasn't had that habit for years.

He didn't dare eat anything sweet either, because he had suffered too much hardship and couldn't forget those bitter days.

"It's alright, I don't eat much anyway," Jiang Yueming said with a smile. "We're still quite suited to a simple life together."

Li Leshan smiled slightly. He wanted to say that it wasn't necessary for everything to be the same for a good life. It depended on who he was with. With Jiang Yueming, even if everything was different, he would still be willing to continue the relationship.

"What's wrong with you today?" Jiang Yueming hesitated for a moment. "Why did you say you missed me? I've been thinking about you for so long. Usually, it's me who says that. I thought only I would do this."

“I just miss you,” Li Leshan retorted. “Can’t I send this message? Then I won’t send it anymore.”

"No!" Jiang Yueming shouted quickly, "It's going to be issued, it's going to be issued."

Seeing how anxious he was, Li Leshan stopped teasing him. "But if you have to come all the way here every time I say I want to, then I'll send you less."

"You missed me, so how could I not come?" Jiang Yueming held one of his hands and put it in his pocket to warm it. He had just gently touched Li Leshan's knuckles with his fingertips when his heart suddenly skipped a beat.

"What happened to your hand?" Jiang Yueming asked hurriedly. "Are you injured? How did you get hurt? Is it serious?"

"Stop..." Li Leshan was a little helpless about the series of questions he was asked. "It's not serious, just a scratch, an accident."

“A little scratch,” Jiang Yueming frowned. “Is this just a little? How much is this? Why didn’t you tell me? If I hadn’t come to find it today…”

“I don’t need to tell you,” Li Leshan rubbed his head, “it will heal soon.”

"You're not taking this minor injury seriously," Jiang Yueming said, rubbing the wound with concern. "You even know to put a band-aid on it; you're not stupid."

Li Leshan felt a little guilty. If it weren't for Liu Yang, he probably wouldn't have thought of this.

“I’m so glad you could come today.” Li Leshan said it sincerely. Seeing Jiang Yueming made all the fatigue and heartache he had been feeling disappear. “But I don’t want you to make an extra trip.”

"If I miss you in the future, just call me and let me hear your voice, and I won't miss you anymore," Li Leshan said with a smile.

Jiang Yueming raised an eyebrow, catching the key point, "Then I won't fight, you can still think about it."

Li Leshan quickly changed his tune, "I don't think so."

Jiang Yueming stared into his bright eyes, her heart skipped a beat, and she felt a little itchy. "Okay. I'll hang up whenever you've had enough."

"I'll never get enough of that," Li Leshan thought. "I wonder if the mobile company can just quit after this deal."

"Just talk for a little while, just a little while," Li Leshan gestured, indicating just a short while, not too long. He didn't want Jiang Yueming to talk into the microphone for so long without getting any response. That would be boring, no matter what.

"Are you worried about the money?" Jiang Yueming asked with a smile.

"I feel sorry for you." Li Leshan didn't say anything to him and walked forward. When it came to calling or texting Jiang Yueming, or anything related to Jiang Yueming, he had never felt sorry for her.

"Why are you so worried about me?" Jiang Yueming asked from behind him. "Lele, I will definitely work hard to earn money in the future, so I can pay for my phone bill."

Li Leshan paused, seemingly stumped by his words, but after a brief pause, he continued walking.

Is it a bit too unambitious to use money to pay for phone credit?

Anyone who didn't know better would think that phone bills were so expensive that you had to rob someone.

"I still need to earn money to support you," Jiang Yueming said, taking a few steps forward and putting her arm around Li Leshan's shoulder. "Okay?"

"No," Li Leshan shook his head. "I need to earn money to support you."

Seeing how serious he was, Jiang Yueming felt a bright future ahead. After all, anyone would be overjoyed to hear such a reliable person looking at him so firmly and saying, "I'll make money to support you in the future."

Jiang Yueming felt that a lot of money was already beckoning to him.

“Fine, then you earn money to support me.” Jiang Yueming was not polite at all; he was not the type to be polite. “I’m hard to please; I can’t stand any hardship.”

Li Leshan nodded seriously, "I won't let you suffer."

“Actually…” Jiang Yueming looked at him, the rest of her words stuck in her throat. He could endure hardship too; it wasn’t like he hadn’t suffered since childhood, or that he couldn’t stand hardship. Being with Li Leshan, even if it meant suffering, he was willing to endure it.

“If,” Li Leshan looked at him, and after a long pause, his hand moved, “if you want to suffer with me, then… just kick me out.”

Jiang Yueming was taken aback. He stared at him for a moment and realized that he was serious. He felt his throat tighten and his heart startle. "What... what are you saying?"

He wanted to say something more, something like, "I'll stay with you no matter what," or "It's okay to suffer with you," or "Don't say that, let's not talk like that," but before he could say anything, Li Leshan shook his head again. He took Jiang Yueming's hand and held it tightly. The warmth from his palm carried a unique sense of security that belonged only to them.

But Jiang Yueming felt a strange emptiness in his heart. He didn't say anything more, just kept holding Li Leshan's hand tightly.

That's just how people are.

As a child, I wasn't afraid of ghosts; as an adult, I'm not afraid of hard work. But the only thing I fear is the other person suffering because of me. I'm afraid of this and that, worried about this and that. I always think that if they leave me, they won't be a burden anymore, and I can let them soar high. But I never thought that the intense pain after a clean break would become a regret and sadness that I can never erase for the rest of my life.

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Author's note: Thank you so much for all the blessings, my darlings! [laughing] I received them all! (pats heart) I'm so happy! [hugs]

A small matter:

It's really embarrassing to not be able to tell east from west...

Add to that the darkness and my severe nearsightedness, and today when I took a taxi, the driver and I went around in circles at three traffic lights and crossed three streets before we finally met (seriously). Dude, do you think I'm stupid? TT

Brother: I was on the east side of the traffic light with my hazard lights on.

I (looked over at once) (dumbfounded): Which side is east? And all those cars have their hazard lights on!