Chapter 32

Cthulion's gaze was extremely oppressive.

Facing such an irrefutable pair of eyes, Miel could not say no, but his answer could not be "yes" either.

He would rather die than be deeply touched by someone he doesn't love.

If it was before revealing Bross's secret, perhaps Miel would have made appropriate compromises for the truth he was pursuing.

But now, he has spent all his energy just to find a reason to live.

He didn't have the energy, nor the desire, to cater to anyone anymore.

Even the God who signed a contract with him, the terrifying Old One, the great Cthulhu.

Finally, after a breathless silence, Miel calmly replied, "First, this is an agreement between Lola and me, and only Lola can enforce it. Secondly, since you know about this agreement, you must also know when it will be fulfilled. I decide the time—not tonight."

Cthulion's eyes narrowed. "According to the contract, I have the right to know everything about you at any time."

Miel met his gaze without flinching. "According to our oath, you will protect me from any harm, not even you. Any intimate contact without my permission will be harmful to me."

Cthulion: "Holding you like this doesn't count?"

Miel: "It doesn't count...but if you hit my stomach with your shoulder, it counts."

Cthulion: "Is this the standard of the elves, or is it a standard you set yourself?"

Miel: "Whether someone is injured or not is best known to the victim. Just because I said I didn't hurt Belén, does that mean Belén isn't injured?"

Cthulion: "You didn't hurt him. He was too weak to withstand the shock of the nightmare."

Miel: “…”

Unable to communicate, don't want to talk.

Miel's eyelashes drooped, blocking the moonlight from shining into his eyes. His beautiful blue eyes were like the depths of the sea in the dark night, filled with unknown depths.

Cthulion had already carried him out of the inn into the night, and then flew up.

Even though they disagreed, he still held him horizontally like a princess, with no intention of abandoning him.

After quietly flying a distance, Cthulion spoke again, adding to his previous remarks: "I understand your point, but if I had no intention of harming others, and they were injured without my permission, can I be blamed for that?"

"Causing harm without knowing it is an even greater crime." Miel responded coldly but firmly.

Cthulion: “…”

After a delicate silence, Cthulion continued to struggle: "Doesn't that mean it's entirely up to you? If you say it's harm, then it's harm?"

"Yes." Miel didn't want to have a hearty debate with Cthulion, but just wanted to end the topic quickly, so he said directly, "You know I don't have the strength to resist you. As long as you want to hurt me, all I can do is endure it. I know very well that this oath to protect me from any harm is your kindness to me, so I will not abuse it. When I say it's hurtful, I mean it will really hurt, not an excuse to escape. If you believe me, give me some time, at least not tonight. If you don't believe me, then you can let me experience the humiliation and pain that Beren experienced in his nightmare."

"No, I will not do that," Cthulion replied. "I did promise to protect you from any harm, and I did leave it to you to decide when to fulfill that promise. I will not break my oath. I am not in a hurry, I am just a little upset."

"For your attitude towards me, and your obsession with the name 'Lola'."

"I think the name Leon suits me better than Lola, so I wanted to use Leon instead of Lola, but you seem to have misunderstood and regarded Leon and Lola as two different individuals, which really makes me very unhappy."

Misunderstanding?

Miel tried to recall what Leon had said.

I remember what Leon said at the time: [I declare that from now on, my name is Leon - in any case, it is a thousand times better than Lola's ridiculous name.]

It turns out that he wasn't disparaging the tentacle named "Lola" at the time, but was simply targeting the name?

Although the name "Lola" was chosen by Lola herself, it is not wrong to say that Leon is belittling Lola...

It seems that Leon and Lola are indeed the same person.

but……

Miel still couldn't accept it.

"When we made the promise, I didn't know you would show up... I mean, you holding me right now."

Miel chose his words carefully to avoid irritating Leon.

"At that time, I assumed that the one who would trample on my dignity would be the black-haired elf named 'Lola'... That's why I agreed."

"It's like I've taken a fancy to a beautiful pottery jar and ordered it, but before it's delivered to me, the maker makes some changes to it without my permission. Even if it becomes more beautiful, it's still not the pot I originally wanted."

Miel felt that he had expressed himself clearly enough - even if you and Lola are the same person, you have changed, you are no longer the person who made the agreement with me, so I don't want to fulfill the agreement.

However, after listening to his explanation, although Cthulion grasped the key point at the first time, he sneered.

"Because I've changed, you don't want to fulfill the agreement? Ha, then, since you've died once before and you've changed, does that mean I don't have to keep my oath to protect you?"

Miel: “…”

He couldn't refute it?

"No, I just..." Miel's brain was working at high speed, and he urgently tried to make up his mind, "I just hope that you can maintain the state you were in when you made the agreement while fulfilling it, such as..."

"For example, become like this?" Leon said in a cold voice. With the sound of something sticky stirring, his facial features changed shape like liquid. His golden eyes darkened and became heavy, emitting a crimson light. His long red hair shrank as if alive. In the end, only the wolf tail barely passed his shoulders. His hair and skin color darkened accordingly.

——Leon, turned into Lola.

Miel stared blankly, forgetting to breathe.

Reflected in his blue eyes was indeed Lola's face.

But this dangerous look, this aggressive look like a predator staring at its prey... is not something Lola would have.

After Leon turned into Lola, Miel realized that Leon's original face was much softer than Lola's.

In fact, Lola's face was more aggressive, but it was melted by his gentle eyebrows and eyes. Therefore, after incorporating Leon's character, he immediately changed from a reliable knight to a cruel tyrant.

Miel misses Lola...

Miel wants to see Lola now.

He wanted to see the real Lola, not a dangerous beast in Lola's appearance!

Almost as he was consumed by such thoughts, Leon, wearing Lola's appearance, fell to the ground.

Miel caught a glimpse of the real Lola out of the corner of his eye, and without waiting for Leon to completely let go of himself, he pushed him away and ran towards where Lola was!

He could almost imagine how angry Leon was when he was pushed away, but he didn't care about anything.

He chanted the spell quickly, walked through the door and came to Lola, threw himself into Lola's arms, buried his head in his chest, and hugged his waist tightly with his arms.

It’s Lola, the real Lola!

Lola's touch, Lola's breath, Lola's body temperature...

Hot tears burst out and fell on Lola's chest.

Lola's thick black eyelashes like crow feathers trembled, and she instinctively raised one arm to hug Miel's fragile shoulders. At the same time, she raised her mysterious ruby ​​eyes to look at Leon, who looked exactly like her, with inquiry and questioning in her eyes.

As he walked, Leon adjusted his face and body back to their original state. He casually lifted his waist-length red hair from his chest to his back, then crossed his arms, raised his chin slightly, and his expression seemed to say - I did nothing wrong.

He shared his memories of the entire hunting trip with Lola to prove that he was right.

However, Lola, who had received the memory, said with a disapproving expression: "This is the first time I've had the urge to beat myself up... Isn't your mental strength very strong? Why can't you even perceive such a strong emotion?"

He also shared something back.

Leon remained silent.

"Yes, your mental power will only cause destruction, I know, I'm just... blaming myself." Lola said to herself, while continuing to hug Miel with one hand, and lifting his chin with the other hand, gently wiping the cool fingertips of her thumb across his moist eyes.

Miel raised his eyes and looked at him with blurry vision. He had so many words he wanted to say, but in the end, they all turned into silent tears.

——Lola, you won’t be swallowed by Leon, right?

——Will you stay with me in this image and character until I truly die?

——Lola, can I still like you?

- No, I will fall into the abyss, I will be doomed, I will be limited and fooled by my own ridiculous cognition, I will let my emotions surge, I will let myself feel lost, hysterical, and heartbroken.

——But I am not even afraid of death, so what does all this matter?

——Which will be destroyed first, my soul or my body?

Cthulora's tentacles were still invisibly wrapped around Miel's body, able to sense all of his touch and emotions, but they could only sense his touch and emotions.

He couldn't hear his inner voice and didn't fully understand his emotions.

However, he truly felt the fear of being pulled by death and being dragged along if he didn't hold on to something.

——Miel's self-destructive tendency, which was originally controllable, is gradually getting out of control.

Why? When did it start?

Not knowing, not understanding, this elf has been more difficult to understand than other intelligent species on land from the very beginning.

They are attracted to the same sex, empathize with others easily, hide their sadness with indifference, reveal their murderous intent with a smile, cannot turn a blind eye to the suffering of others, but downplay their own pain.

For some reason, I felt a little angry, and there was an indescribable emotion surging.

Czulola wiped away Miel's tears with gentle movements, and suddenly said "I'm sorry".

Miel looked at him in confusion.

In Miel's opinion, Lola did nothing wrong from beginning to end. The one who was wrong was Leon who wanted to force him.

However, Lola said, "It is indeed difficult for you to accept that we are actually one person. In this case, I promise you that when we fulfill this agreement, only I, who am standing in front of you now, will be present. Is that okay?"

Miel nodded.

That's exactly what he wanted.

Sure enough, unlike Leon, Lola cares about his feelings.

Miel thought that Leon would be dissatisfied with such a decision, but strangely, Leon said nothing and stood aside silently, only his eyes were always looking in his direction.

"Your mental state is too bad now, you need sleep." Lola said as she picked up Mielle horizontally, her movements as careful as if she was holding a real princess.

"I know which 'nearby hotel' you mean. I'll carry you there. If you're tired, you can just sleep in my arms," ​​said Lola.

Miel leaned comfortably in his arms, raised her hands and hooked them around his neck, her posture relaxed and intimate.

He let out a very soft "hmm".

It took a while before I remembered, "Where's Ina?"

"Ina didn't have the patience to stand there and wait for me to come back after you finished killing people, so he found a place to stay for the night."

"...Will she be in danger?"

"Although it's just a feeling, looking at the entire Snow City, the most dangerous person, besides the one in the church, should be her."

Miel:?

"It seems that she will not be in danger, so I feel relieved." Miel was too tired to give up thinking and closed his eyes in Lola's arms.

Tomorrow...should I fulfill the agreement first, or go to the church to pick up Rocas first?

Hope Rocas is doing well in church.