I stopped and stood a distance away from the villa, about the size of a streetlamp, looking directly at Yang Sisi. The wind blew from her and then to my side, making me feel unsteady on my feet. Perhaps it was because I had drunk too much, or perhaps my heart was swaying.

Finally, I shouted to her, "I've been to Shanghai for you, and I have no regrets... If there's a next life, we must meet sooner; in this life, I've lived too unfreely and with too heavy a burden... In the next life, it's a promise, I will live a carefree life, going wherever I want... with you."

I dared not look at Yang Sisi standing barefoot on the balcony any longer, so I turned around and walked towards the path I was supposed to take.

She would definitely cry. I left because I didn't dare to look, and I couldn't bear to look.

I am a confused person, at least in this complicated situation. I cannot easily make promises, and I only dare to say that I will be reborn in the next life. It seems like I am lying, because even Master Ma, who practices Buddhism, is not sure if reincarnation exists.

As I left the villa area, I was lucky enough to run into a taxi dropping off passengers, and I followed it to the airport. If I had been ten minutes later, I probably wouldn't have been able to get my boarding pass. I boarded the plane without incident, but my heart felt like it was trapped in the early summer night, a little chilly.

If I had acted impulsively just now, what would the situation be like now?

I stared at the plane's wing for a long time, but I couldn't figure it out. Suddenly, I really wanted to smoke a cigarette.

...

Late at night, I flew from Shanghai to Dali and took a taxi back to my accommodation. Although I was very tired, I lay in bed for a long time before I finally fell asleep, and my sleep quality was not good... I had many dreams.

I dreamt that I was wandering the world with Yang Sisi, and then I dreamt that I married Lu Jia, had children, and life just continued peacefully like that; finally, I dreamt of Ye Zhi, and that she was swept into the sea by a giant wave, her hands outstretched, crying for help in pain... I tried desperately to save her, but every time I was about to grab her hand, the giant wave would push us away... I swallowed a lot of seawater, and my whole body was ice cold. When the next giant wave crashed down like a tidal wave, I was awakened.

I sat on the bed for a long time to calm down before finally looking out the window...

It's raining again outside. Rainwater drips from the eaves onto the edge of the windowsill. A weed grows on the wooden windowsill, swaying left and right in the wind. The huge Cangshan Mountain is gloomy in the distance, surrounded by dark clouds and fog, which looks particularly suffocating.

...

There was a knock on the door, and Nicole stood outside and said to me, "Are you awake? I made breakfast, let's eat together."

"What breakfast?"

"Porridge and steamed buns."

"I'll wash my face and then go downstairs..."

As I spoke, I put on my coat, quickly washed up, and went downstairs. Nicole had already placed the porridge and steamed buns on the table. After I sat down, she asked me, "What time did you get back last night?"

"I didn't lie down in bed until 4:30, and I need to catch up on some sleep later."

"You saw Sisi?"

"I saw him."

"Nothing happened?"

I countered, "What do you hope will happen between us?"

"It's best if nothing happens... but I think Sisi is the kind of girl who will take a lot of care if you give her a little something... This time, she'll definitely be willing to do anything for you."

I looked at Nicole and put down my chopsticks.

"Why aren't you saying anything? Did I just guess right?"

My voice was low and deep: "You were right... At that moment, I felt terrible... But I can't take her away. If I really did, everything would fall apart!"

What did she say to you?

I shook my head, indicating that I didn't want to talk about it.

Nicole, being a seasoned veteran, had already guessed most of what was going on, so she didn't press the matter further. After a moment of silence, I spoke first, saying to her, "I ran into Ye Zhi on the Bund, and she told me... she's already engaged."

Nicole looked at me in surprise, and after a long while replied, "No way, she didn't mention this when we were eating together before."

"Maybe she had some doubts... but the fact that she told me in person shows that she has made up her mind."

"It must be a business marriage!"

I didn't ask her.

After saying that, I stopped looking at Nicole and stared blankly at the drizzling rain outside. I thought back to that night when she told me about it, and how she felt—it was like being torn apart by pain.

After a moment of silence, Nicole asked, "What are you going to do?"

I chuckled and replied, "You want me to go to her wedding and cause a scene?"

"That's not what I meant. I just think it's a real shame... Anyone can see that you two still love each other, but you can't be together... I really want to advise you, but if you think about it carefully, you do have your difficulties, and she has hers!"

"Stop trying to persuade her, the more you try, the more painful it will be... I'll just pretend she never came back. That's for the best, and I won't have to imagine what kind of life she'll lead with someone else."

"Well, I won't try to persuade you... What are your plans for the future?"

"I came back to Dali to make money."

"The fact that you understand this makes you much better than most men."

I smiled and replied, "Humans are actually more like animals that live on the ocean. If you can't learn to build yourself a ship but are 'fascinated' by the underwater world, you'll drown sooner or later!"

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