I walked up to Yang Sisi with a nonchalant air and asked her, "Isn't your inn just ahead? Why didn't you go ahead first?"

"I was going to leave first, but your expression seemed a bit off when you answered the phone, so I wanted to ask what's wrong?"

"I won't tell you anything."

"Why do you keep everything to yourself? Aren't you afraid of hurting yourself by bottling it all up?"

"Some things are better left unsaid than said."

Yang Sisi looked at me with a disdainful and unconvinced expression. She said to me, "Are you afraid that if you say it out loud, others will laugh at you? ... Put your hand on your heart and tell me, we've known each other for so many years, when have I ever mocked your sore spot? I've only ever tried to help you find solutions to your problems, okay?"

"Is that so? Then can you untie the knot in my heart?"

"Tell me, I'll give it a try."

I first took a cigarette from the pack and lit it, then sat down on the steps next to Yang Sisi. After smoking half a cigarette, I said to her, "That phone call was from Lu Jia... She said that I make her feel very insecure right now, and she wants me to transfer the ownership of the house I just bought in Dali to her name... She said she will definitely marry me, but I feel that she doesn't trust me at all, so I didn't dare to tell her that I was planning to deliver food... She will definitely be disappointed in me... If this disappointment continues into our future marital relationship, just thinking about it is terrifying!"

"You agreed to transfer the house to her name?"

"Well, I'll try my best to satisfy her while I still have the ability to... If she wants more, I really won't be able to give it to her."

"I just don't understand. If you like houses so much, why don't you work hard to buy one yourself? ... I find it really boring to keep seeking so-called security from men."

"Do you think everyone is like you, born with a silver spoon in their mouth? ... A woman like her has no advantages once she's over 30."

Does she often convey these ideas to you?

I paused for a moment, then nodded... The reason I agreed to Lu Jia's request to break up was because I didn't want my lack of success to hold her back. Her "30-year-old crisis" theory made me very nervous too.

Yang Sisi continued, "So, when you're together, she always makes you feel like you owe her something... But you happen to be someone who's most afraid of owing others, so it must be really painful for you!"

“I am in pain, but what she said is not wrong... If a man always expects his woman to unconditionally tolerate and understand him, it is not only selfish, but also a sign of incompetence... I don’t want to be that kind of man.”

"Yes, it's because of this mental burden that you agree when she says she wants to break up, and you agree when she wants the house... How can there be such a foolish man as you in this world!... Aren't you afraid that if you give her everything, she'll change her mind in the end?"

"Of course I'm afraid. These two houses in Chengdu and Dali represent the culmination of my hard work over the past few years... I wouldn't feel secure if they were all in her name... But we think differently. I'll find ways to earn more assets, and then make the value of those two houses negligible in my mind. That way, I'll feel secure..."

At this point, I smiled and said, "Tell me, someone with a full granary wouldn't be heartbroken to throw away a single sesame seed, would they?"

"Come on, these two houses are worth at least 4 million... Do you really think money is so easy to make these days? If you don't have hundreds of millions in your hands, how can you say that 4 million worth of real estate is nothing?"

I didn't say anything, just took two deep drags on my cigarette. I knew in my heart that Lu Jia was the kind of woman who would only be kind to others if they were kind to her first... This was already quite good, much better than the kind of woman who would be kind to you but not appreciate it at all. At least during the time Lao Mi was sick, she stayed by my side, never leaving me. Other women wouldn't do that so easily... So, resolving our issues wasn't actually complicated, as long as we could get married as planned... Whose name was on the house, whether we felt secure, those were all minor matters.

Having figured this out, I finally felt a little relieved. I said to Yang Sisi, "Let's not talk about this anymore. Let's go back to sleep early... I have to report to the company at 6 o'clock tomorrow morning and do an hour of training before I can start working."

"Have you considered going with me to deliver food?"

"Don't joke around, that's not a job you can do... I still think it's more reliable for you to sell some clothes on Renmin Road, and it also suits your 'personality'."

"You mean I like to sneak around?"

"I mean you like seeking thrills... Not everyone has the courage to confront the urban management officers."

"Okay, then I'll go sell clothes on Renmin Road... It's best to go back to square one!"

As Yang Sisi spoke, she snorted again to express her dissatisfaction with the "random" advice I had given her... She was probably really dissatisfied, so much so that before I could even respond, she left before me, and I watched her leave, and then I saw glimpses of the past in her departing figure.

Yes, if only everything could go back to the beginning... without so much love, hate, and debts, just the brute force of wanting to put all that passion into building the future.

...

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