0044 Night Rose,~Night.44

Ruan Mei once tried hard to search through her childhood memories to see if she could find one or two gems. It didn't matter if they were broken into pieces. As long as she felt that Lin Bina had once liked her, she would be satisfied.

Unfortunately, there was nothing, not even a speck of dust could be found. Since she was old enough to understand, she could only see indifference on Lin Bina's face.

If disgust and impatience could still make it seem that Lin Bina had some emotions towards her, that was not the case. On that face that looked somewhat like hers, only indifference could be seen all year round, like ice without a single crack.

Ruan Lan, who is four years older than her, has always been the smart one.

When she was a child, Ruan Mei would cry and ask her, "Sister, why doesn't mom like me?"

Ruan Lan would comfort her and say, Mom likes good children with good grades. As long as you have good grades and get first place, Mom will see you.

Ruan Mei tried hard and always acted like a good child to please her mother. Indeed, when she handed in the test paper with full marks, the ice lake seemed to melt a little, so she worked harder, hoping to melt the glacier by her own strength.

But one day, when the score in the upper right corner was no longer a three-digit number, she received her first beating.

The words "I will try harder next time" were still lingering in her throat when she looked up and saw Lin Bina picking up the yellow wooden ruler on the desk. Suddenly, a cold wind blew.

There was a crisp sound from the flesh and bones, and the test paper in his hand fell like a dead leaf. After a few seconds, red marks appeared on the part that was hit by the wooden ruler. The pain slowly spread from the wrist to the whole arm. The skin was on fire, but the blood was extremely cold.

Before the tears could form, the second and third drops of snow fell on her forearm. "Pa, pa, pa," there was the dull sound of branches bent by the heavy snow and falling to the black earth.

Why are you so useless?!

I've already given you a chance, why don't you cherish it?!

So stupid!!

Don’t hide, put your hands up!

The words her mother cursed out were not foul, but every word was like the tip of a sharp knife, cutting through her beating little heart.

It seemed as if blood was squeezing out from the wound and flowing all over the ground. Salty tears flowed into the corners of her mouth and were swallowed through her aching throat, dripping onto the bleeding wound on her heart. The pain made her tremble all over, and the cold sweat she felt soaked her thin school uniform.

It's a huge fall.

The harder she tried to do well in the exam, the uglier the bright red numbers became. The ink words on the textbooks and test papers became like little worms, drilling holes and gnawing at her head.

She still felt the pain when the ruler fell, but later she became mentally numb.

Seeing her mother "reprimanding" her with a dark face, Ruan Mei felt for a moment that she had finally found the emotions that resonated with her in her and no longer treated her as a transparent person.

Lin Bina treats Ruan Lan in the way she envied and longed for. She would ask about her well-being, pick her up and drop her off attentively, and chat with her about everything.

They are a normal mother and daughter.

She would still seek comfort from her sister after being "reprimanded", and Ruan Lan would wrap both of them in a blanket to comfort her, saying that her mother's temper had only become more unstable after her father left, so she asked her to be more understanding of her mother's difficulties.

"The little girl in Bina's family is really miserable. Please help and comfort Bina."

Ruan Mei, who was sitting in the women's restroom, heard the sound of hands washing outside. The person speaking should be her third cousin.

That day was the memorial service for Ruan Mei's grandmother. The old lady was one of the few people who had ever given Ruan Mei warmth. She cried so hard that she almost suffocated at the memorial service. Lin Bina pinched her secretly and told her to go to the bathroom to wash her face.

She still couldn't stop crying, and hid in the toilet cubicle, trying her best to calm her turbulent emotions. Unexpectedly, she heard the whispers of her aunts and cousins.

"How can I persuade her? She hasn't been quite right since her divorce. Ruan Mei was born into this situation."

"Oh, her ex-husband is so patriarchal, and the woman outside gave birth to a son for him, why didn't he get rid of Lin Bina quickly?"

"I don't know what Bina was thinking at the time. She was so determined to have a boy... She even went to Hong Kong to get the gender. And then, after the baby was born, they treated her like a jinx... What a sin, what a sin..."

The woman's voice grew weaker and weaker, and then the heavy wooden door sealed the air, and the bathroom returned to its suffocating silence.

Her sobbing had stopped long ago, and she clutched the black skirt gauze in her trembling palms. The black skirt was soaked with the scent of Buddhist incense. The faucet was not closed tightly, and the leaking water droplets hit the washbasin, shattering the tense nerves in her brain.

She had imagined many reasons why Lin Bina hated her, but she never considered that her birth was already a sin.

Her mother never read fairy tales to her, so Ruan Mei never believed in fairy tales.

Without Santa Claus's gift, the little mermaid with bright golden hair would not fall in love with the prince on land, the brave dragon slayer would die in the flames spewed by the evil dragon, and the little prince's rose would wither day by day.

Ruan Mei will never get her mother's love.

While eating, Ruan Mei was a little absent-minded watching Gong Xin interact with the two children. She wondered what it would be like if she were a "mother"?

In fact, at Sister Zhu's restaurant that day, she vaguely heard a few words from Chen Shanye's mother-in-law. Not to mention that she didn't look like someone who could take care of children, she had never interacted with children in real life.

She would worry that people like her would make her children stop believing in fairy tales.

As soon as the two children finished their meal, they ran back to the play area. Gong Xin asked the waiter to clear the table and asked Ruan Mei, "Would you like to order dessert?"

"No, I'm already full."

The waiter took away the empty plates and replaced their lemonade. After they left, Gong Xin spoke again, "Actually, I've also had moments of confusion and doubt, wondering if someone like me is fit to be a mother."

"How could that be? You taught Bai Yu very well."

Gong Xin shook her head and smiled, "Bai Yu taught me very well."

Ruan Mei knew that the parent-child relationship was actually mutual and was a crystal clear mirror.

"My sixth uncle said something to me at that time, and I think it suits you very well... What a coincidence, speak of the devil and he will appear." Gong Xin saw the man peeking at the entrance of the restaurant and raised her hand to wave at him.

Ruan Mei followed her gaze towards the door. A tall man in slippers walked towards their table, and the big gold chain dangling around his neck was very conspicuous.

Gong Xin introduced the two to each other: "My sixth uncle, the Rose I often mentioned to you."

"Hello." Gong Liusheng nodded and greeted her, then put his hand on Gong Xin's shoulder and rubbed it. Gong Xin looked up at him, and the man bent down and kissed her.

“…” Ruan Mei lowered her head silently and drank the lemonade in the glass.

Hiss, so sour...

"I'll go in and play with the two kids, you guys continue chatting." Gong Liusheng rubbed the back of Gong Xin's neck like he was a kitten.

"Tell them they have to go home after playing for half an hour. Xiao Cong has to help them with their homework tonight."

"Tsk, I know."

Gong Xin continued what she had just left unfinished: "He told me that I am Gong Xin first, and then Bai Yu's mother, and then other identities. Although there are many things to consider when two people are in a relationship, you should also be Ruan Mei first to Master Chen, and then other identities."

She took a sip of lemonade. "Don't put too much pressure on yourself. No one learns to be a parent right away. Everyone learns as they go along. I'm still learning how to take care of two children with completely different personalities."

"Let's not talk about you and me, just him..." Gong Xin raised her chin and pointed at the two children in the playhouse area. "He wasn't ready to be a father before, and now he's learning day by day."

Gong Liusheng was directed by two children to be a "restaurant guest". The tall man was nestled among a pile of colorful toys, holding a small plastic teacup between his fingers, and praising in a pinched voice that the wooden cake was so delicious.

Ruan Mei smiled, wondering what Chen Shanye was like when he played with his son.

Gong Xin retracted her gaze, looked Ruan Mei in the eye, and said, "But don't treat this as an exam. You don't have to get a perfect score or compete for first place. Just do it with a clear conscience."

————Author’s nonsense————

This chapter and the previous one both involve some of the plot of "Love Her"

Therefore, the charges for these two chapters are only half a chapter, please note~

MeasureMeasure

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