“Clatter—”

Late at night, there was a sound of water running in the bathroom.

Fu Chenyu's hands turned red after being washed in cold water, but he rubbed his fingers desperately as if he had no feeling at all.

The boy's face was pale. He didn't have the shame and surprise of growing up, but only endless fear.

In his dream, Ji Mian's face kept appearing in front of his eyes. Fu Chenyu was startled and looked up at the mirror. In the mirror, there were only his eyes full of bloodshot and desire that had not subsided.

After a while, he suddenly felt that he looked very disgusting.

“Crash—”

There was another sound of water splashing, and Fu Chenyu suddenly splashed cold water on his face.

November was already late autumn, and the stimulation of cold water made him a little more sober. Fu Chenyu supported himself on the white tiles with his hands, and it took him a long time to calm down.

When he returned to the bedroom, he had already changed into clean pants and sheets.

Fu Chenyu sat in front of the computer, skillfully searching for three words on the Internet: homosexuality.

Even if he was ignorant, he knew that it was normal for boys to be interested in girls after being influenced by all kinds of jokes from his peers.

However, he developed a desire for Ji Mian and had inappropriate thoughts about his childhood playmate.

He thought his love for Ji Mian was very simple, but now this pure feeling was being unscrupulously tainted by dark desires.

The seeds buried deep in Fu Chenyu's heart seemed to be gradually sprouting, and the vague feelings of childhood gradually took shape. He realized that his possessiveness of Ji Mian was far more than that.

In the early 2000s, the views on homosexuality on domestic search engines were still relatively conservative. Some people asked whether they were gay, and some parents asked whether their children were gay, but there was no effective advice.

More voices are showing "abnormal", "abnormal", "this is a curable disease".

Fu Chenyu read it silently and went to the foreign website without hesitation.

Attitudes towards homosexuality abroad are much more relaxed, but it still shows that this is not a type of love that can be recognized by most people.

This road is destined to be difficult and destined to be isolated and helpless.

Fu Chenyu sat in front of the computer for a long time, so long that he seemed as if he had become a statue.

It was not until he heard the cheerful singing of birds outside the window and the dawn was rising in the sky that he turned off the computer and lay back in bed.

That night, the thirteen-year-old boy couldn't sleep all night, carrying a bitter secret and an almost hopeless love.

Ji Mian's first year of junior high school was uneventful, and before the blink of an eye, it was the end of the year.

He didn't know if it was his illusion, but this semester, Fu Chenyu seemed to have become much colder towards him. Every time he took the initiative to invite Fu Chenyu to walk together after school or go to the playground to play basketball, Fu Chenyu refused with various reasons.

Sometimes, he even ignored him.

If it weren't for the things they experienced together in elementary school, Ji Mian would probably have thought that Fu Chenyu hated him.

Because of Fu Chenyu's estrangement, Ji Mian was a little depressed, and even Lin Minzhi noticed his low mood.

Lin Minzhi thought Ji Mian was worried about the final exam. After all, this was the final exam of the first semester of the first year of junior high school, which was related to the class placement in the second year of junior high school and whether he could stay in the experimental class. She also advised Ji Mian to relax and not be too nervous about the exam.

Ji Mian listened absentmindedly. Lin Minzhi looked at her son who was gradually growing up, and had some thoughts in her mind.

I don't know... Has Mianmian experienced any puberty development?

Lin Minzhi has paid close attention to Ji Mian's growth over the past year.

I also secretly looked in Ji Mian's clothes basket. There were no dirty clothes that he had changed in the middle of the night, and I didn't see him changing the sheets either.

My son is... a little late in development?

Lin Minzhi was worried. She heard that boys who develop late tend to be short. Ji Weiguo and she were not very tall. What if Mianmian grew too short and couldn't find a wife?

Her worries may have really paid off. On the day before the final exam, Ji Mian suffered from insomnia for the first time.

He went to bed at twelve o'clock and woke up from his dream at three o'clock in the middle of the night. His pants were sticky. He knew what it was without even looking. Ji Mian blushed in embarrassment.

After traveling through time, I didn’t expect to go through puberty again... well!

His originally fair skin turned red from his neck to his face, like a boiled shrimp.

Ji Mian quickly changed his pajamas and bed sheets, and hid in the bathroom in the middle of the night to wash them. The next morning, Lin Minzhi saw the changed bed sheets hanging on the balcony.

She didn't say anything, but just added an extra egg to breakfast, wishing Ji Mian had finally grown up into an adult on this day!

Although Ji Mian felt embarrassed and ashamed about growing up, he still performed well in the exam the next day.

The nine subjects were tested over two days. After the last subject on the second day, students had to go to the classroom to collect their winter vacation homework.

The class was very lively, and the most discussed topic was a newly opened ice skating rink near the school. Everyone was discussing going there to play during the holidays.

While finishing her homework, He Xi invited Ji Mian: "Ji Mian, can you skate? Let's go together. It's only ten yuan an hour."

Ji Mian was a little moved. He subconsciously glanced at Fu Chenyu, struggling with whether he should ask Fu Chenyu to go play with him.

Fu Chenyu hadn't paid much attention to Ji Mian for more than a month. His sudden neglect of Ji Mian made Ji Mian confused and uncomfortable.

Or find an excuse to repair the relationship.

He Xi went to invite Su Luoyu: "Su Su, are you going?"

Su Luoyu is now very handsome, unlike Ji Mian's gorgeous appearance. He looks very cold and aloof. "When? Fu Chenyu, are you going?"

He also invited Fu Chenyu.

Ji Mian's heart skipped a beat and he turned around to look.

Fu Chenyu withdrew his gaze from the playground, but before he could answer, a few girls suddenly stood at the door, looking towards their classroom with blushing faces.

She is not a first-year junior high school student, she looks like a second-year junior high school student.

"Fu Chenyu, I'm looking for you!"

A roar in the classroom immediately attracted everyone's attention.

Several girls gathered around the girl with an oval face in the front. Her ears were red as she whispered softly, "Fu Chenyu, can you come out for a moment?"

Ji Mian was stunned and thought, this looks like he's going to confess his love!

He grew up with Fu Chenyu and had seen many girls have a crush on Fu Chenyu, but very few of them had the courage to confess their love to this cool guy with an ice-cold face.

Ji Mian suddenly had a feeling of watching his own child grow up. He felt inexplicably relieved and a little proud. See, the boss is really popular, even more popular than the protagonist!

He secretly felt partial to her, thinking that Su Luoyu's taste was really poor. How could she be interested in Li Jue? Was it because the boss wasn't affectionate enough or rich enough?

Li Jue said he loved Su Luoyu but at the same time he was looking for a substitute who looked like Su Luoyu. What a scumbag...

Thinking of this, Ji Mian realized that he was the cannon fodder substitute, and the smile on his face froze instantly.

Ji Mian wanted to gossip for a while longer, but the girl had already walked away with the boss, so he could only retract his stretched neck with regret.

Su Luoyu suddenly said, "Ji Mian, are you interested?"

Ji Mian and Su Luoyu were childhood sweethearts, having grown up together, but he didn't have a deep friendship with Su Luoyu because he was afraid that if he did, his life would be in danger.

But we usually chat like this.

"It's okay." Ji Mian said, "I just think it's too early to fall in love now."

Su Luoyu's eyes were slightly dazed, and she suddenly said, "Ji Mian, do you have someone you like?"

Ji Mian suddenly became alert. This familiar opening line had a hidden meaning... Could it be that the protagonist had already fallen in love?

He suddenly remembered that in the original novel "Stranger Tenderness", Su Luoyu should be staying at a friend's house at this time, and this friend is Su Luoyu's childhood white moonlight, Li Weishi.

It is said that he died very early, so all the men who fell in love with the protagonist later were jealous of Li Weishi's importance in Su Luoyu's heart!

But why did Su Luoyu share this with me?

Ji Mian silently complained: This girl’s lovemaking rhythm…is not suitable to be shared with a straight man like me…

"No." Ji Mian shook his head: "I'm still a student now, and students should focus on their studies."

As he spoke, he had a vague feeling of advising Su Luoyu. After all, in the original novel, both Su Luoyu and Li Jue seemed to be love-brained. When it came to love, they were so desperate that their friends around them went through a lot of trouble for their love.

Not to mention him, the cannon fodder substitute, whose life was ruined by the two of them.

Su Luoyu sighed softly, looking like she was troubled.

The next second, he cheered up: "Ji Mian, my birthday is coming soon. Would you like to come to my house to celebrate my birthday?"

Ji Mian's first reaction was to refuse, but He Xi answered faster than him: "Su Su, why didn't you invite me?"

Su Luoyu smiled and said, "Yes, of course you should come. Fu Chenyu, Kang Jun and the others, come too. I like lively atmosphere."

It turns out that I wasn't specifically invited to be alone...

Huh, Ji Mian breathed a sigh of relief and agreed happily.

Among the protagonist's classmates, he was just an ordinary passerby! Not special at all.

Moreover, rejecting the protagonist would seem too deliberate. The best way is to maintain a distant relationship with him and become an ordinary classmate.

Well, be more cautious and cherish your life!

Fu Chenyu came back soon. He Xi wanted to gossip, but because of the boss's cold and indifferent temperament that kept people at a distance, she trembled and retracted her head.

Ji Mian said softly: "Fu Chenyu, what does Senior Sister want to talk to you about?"

Fu Chenyu raised his eyes and saw Ji Mian's face. The guilt and disgust towards himself instantly surged in his heart.

A month had passed, but he still couldn't forget the feeling of that night. It was the first time he felt dirty.

Faced with Ji Mian's pure eyes, Fu Chenyu almost ran away, not even daring to look at him.

"She confessed." Fu Chenyu said briefly.

Ji Mian's eyes were wide open. He had always been like this whenever he was startled since he was a child, just like the cotton rabbit raised by Fu Chenyu.

"Then you agree?"

"without."

She was so cold and indifferent, and she just ignored him.

Ji Mian sighed, "Actually, I think that senior is quite pretty."

Fu Chenyu didn't say anything. After hearing Ji Mian's answer, he held his breath and felt choked up. He seemed unable to continue, so he squeezed out a sentence: "Do you like this type?"

Ji Mian shook his head: "I'm just expressing my admiration for beautiful girls. After all, what boy doesn't like to look at them..."

He lost his temper mid-sentence and quickly shut up.

Ji Mian suddenly remembered that Fu Chenyu was the man who didn't like looking at beautiful women!

He is the affectionate second male villain in a BL novel!

Although he didn't say anything, he understood what Ji Mian meant.

Fu Chenyu closed his eyes coldly and tasted a hint of sourness.

Yes, Ji Mian likes girls.

Su Luoyu's birthday is January 17th, and Ji Mian picked out a pen for him in the gift shop.

When paying, Ji Mian saw a fountain pen with a fox cap on the counter, and he immediately remembered that Fu Chenyu had a little fox pendant that looked like the same one.

Fu Chenyu was still quarreling with him, so he wanted to buy him a pen and make peace with him.

On January 17th, Ji Mian rode his bicycle to the Haiwan Community.

It was his first time visiting Su Luoyu's house, and he was a little nervous.

I heard from my grandmother and others that Su Luoyu's parents divorced when he was in elementary school. He was awarded to Yang Chaoying and now lives in Li Weishi's house.

Li Weishi was Su Luoyu's childhood sweetheart. It is said that he was a piano teacher who took good care of Su Luoyu when she was in the Children's Palace. Over time, the two became good teachers and friends.

But Su Luoyu, who was experiencing a low point in her life at the time, was taken home by Li Weishi and lived under the same roof. The gratitude for Li Weishi's timely help gradually changed in her heart. As Su Luoyu grew older, she gradually fell in love with Li Weishi.

When I asked Ji Mian if he had someone he liked that day, I was probably just worrying about my own young heart that was just beginning to fall in love.

Of course, Ji Mian knew all this through the original novel.

When Ji Mian arrived, all of Su Luoyu's friends had arrived.

The protagonist is a bottom, so he naturally has a wide range of social connections and many friends. In addition to those in the same class, he also has friends he met in interest groups.

Ji Mian's appearance surprised everyone present. After all, he was very handsome. If not compared with Fu Chenyu, he was also a handsome guy!

"This is for you, happy birthday." Ji Mian gave the gift generously.

"Thank you." Su Luoyu thanked him softly. He looked very happy today.

After giving the gift, Ji Mian pretended to be a stranger with no sense of existence. He sat on the sofa and watched others having fun without saying a word.

His eyes searched for Fu Chenyu's shadow, but he couldn't find it.

Ji Mian felt a little lost, his hand in his pocket tightly holding the fox fountain pen.

That's true, the boss doesn't look like someone who would come to someone else's birthday party, not to mention, this is his love rival's house!

"Susu, are all your friends here?"

A young man in his twenties walked out of the kitchen. He was tall and handsome, with a pair of passionate peach blossom eyes.

Ji Mian knew without a doubt that this must be Li Weishi. Generally, handsome men in novels have some relationship with Su Luoyu.

He looked at Li Weishi curiously for a few times and thought, is this the soulful male protagonist of "Stranger Tenderness"?

The man who runs through the entire story and makes all the male supporting characters hate him with gritted teeth?

She was really good-looking, but it was a pity that she didn't live long and passed away early.

And Li Weishi seemed to have noticed Ji Mian as well.

His gaze lingered on Ji Mian's face for a few seconds, and then he gave him a gentle smile.

Ji Mian looked away: ...the protagonist is Bai Yueguang, I'd better not make eye contact with him, otherwise I will die quickly.

Under Li Weishi's command, Su Luoyu cut the cake and sang the birthday song with everyone.

Most of the snacks on the table were eaten. Ji Mian drank two cups of coconut milk. His lower abdomen felt a little bloated and he wanted to go to the bathroom.

When he came out of the bathroom, Li Weishi was flipping through a photo album. He was talkative and lively, with many topics to talk about. He even had something in common with junior high school students. Just a few words from him made everyone admire him.

Ji Mian was stunned and thought to himself, this is worthy of being the protagonist's white moonlight, this configuration is top-notch!

Li Weishi was showing everyone photos of Su Luoyu when she was a child. Ji Mian found a seat not too far away and sat down, then looked at a few of the photos.

After finishing one book, Su Luoyu took up another one. Her face was already red: "Brother Li!"

Li Weishi smiled and said, "You were so cute when you were a child, why don't you let people see you?"

As he spoke, he opened the photo album, but this one was different from the previous one. In addition to Su Luoyu's photos, there were also some old photos of Li Weishi himself.

Those in junior high school, high school, college, and working.

He Xi looked at it and suddenly pointed at a photo and said, "Brother Li, who is this?"

Ji Mian looked at the photo and saw a pair of brothers who looked somewhat similar. The elder brother was Li Weishi and the younger brother was an elementary school student.

He instinctively disliked the elementary school student next to Li Weishi. Although that person had not grown up yet, there was already a hint of arrogance and evil between his brows, which looked quite annoying.

Li Weishi smiled and said, "Oh, this is my younger brother, Li Jue. Like you, he is also in the first grade this year."

As soon as he finished speaking, Ji Mian's head went blank and buzzed, as if someone had hit him hard with a hammer. In an instant, he could not hear any sound.

For a moment, Ji Mian hoped that he had heard wrongly.

His face instantly turned as pale as the wall, his heart began to beat violently, and his body trembled uncontrollably.

Severe decision... Severe decision...

Li Weishi is actually Li Jue’s biological brother!

Li Jue's name was like the devil's whisper, and just hearing it made Ji Mian's whole body crawl.

He didn't know if it was an illusion, but after so many years, Ji Mian's suffocating feeling of being on the verge of death reappeared. His eyes turned black, and fragments of memories kept flashing through his mind, followed by the freezing cold sea water. Li Jue's arrogant and ostentatious face appeared in front of him. He and Su Luoyu were a pair, hugging each other tightly, with relief on their faces for surviving the disaster.

In the kidnapping planned by Fu Chenyu, Li Jue chose to rescue Su Luoyu and gave up on him.

The deep betrayal and cruel abandonment by his lover, the heart-wrenching despair and pain, almost made Ji Mian fall to the ground.

"Ji Mian? Ji Mian..." He Xi waved her five fingers in front of his eyes and asked worriedly, "Are you feeling unwell?"

Ji Mian came back to his senses and found himself completely limp. He opened his mouth to speak, only to hear his voice was horribly hoarse: "I'm fine."

He Xi asked doubtfully, "Are you really okay? Are you sweating a lot?"

Ji Mian waved his hands weakly: "It's okay, I have a little low blood sugar, I'll just go out for a walk."

He didn't want to stay in this room any longer. Su Luoyu's presence reminded him all the time that he might not have escaped the plot of the book for all these years.

As if his throat was being strangled by an inevitable fate, Ji Mian felt that he could hardly breathe. As soon as he ran downstairs, he began to retch into the trash can.

He vomited out everything he had just eaten. His stomach was cramping in pain and his pale cheeks were covered with sweat.

After vomiting, Ji Mian rested for a few minutes, bought a bottle of water to rinse his mouth in a daze, and walked aimlessly on the street.

It took a long time for him to calm down and his heartbeat gradually stabilized.

Just now, he was too panicked.

Because he was completely unprepared, the moment he heard Li Jue's name, he had a series of terrible reactions due to stress.

Ji Mian pinched the bridge of his nose with his hand and sighed.

Although the plot of "Stranger Tenderness" would unfold in his mind from time to time, Ji Mian did not notice some details that needed to be scrutinized.

Li Weishi and Li Jue have the same surname, he should have suspected it earlier.

Unexpectedly, the white moonlight that Su Luoyu liked turned out to be Li Jue's biological brother. It must be said that the two brothers do look 70% similar. Ji Mian suddenly realized that after Li Weishi's death, Su Luoyu used Li Jue as a substitute?

He was stunned for a moment, amused by his own thoughts.

If it is really as I guessed, then the life-and-death love between Su Luoyu and Li Jue is quite plastic.

Both of them said that they loved each other the most, but in the end one treated the other as a substitute, and the other found a substitute for the other.

Just thinking about the fact that he was the cannon fodder substitute between the two of them, Ji Mian really couldn't feel happy.

He walked in the direction of the setting sun and unknowingly arrived at the community where Fu Chenyu lived.

Lin Jianyi has now firmly established himself as the second-in-command in Tongcheng. The residential complex where his family lives is naturally a state-allocated residential complex. It is inhabited by officials at or above the bureau level and is guarded by layers of security.

Ji Mian didn't know why he walked here. He thought that when he was panicked, he would go home and escape to the safe haven that Lin Minzhi had created for him.

Maybe it’s because there’s still a fox fountain pen in my pocket that I haven’t given away.

It could also be because... I want to see Fu Chenyu.

He wanted to see him and confirm whether this Fu Chenyu was his Fu Chenyu.

He grew up with him and is his best friend. They experienced snow disasters and SARS together and they are good friends who are like "friends for life and death".

Instead of that... Fox who had the gentlest smile on his face but could shoot and break his calf without hesitation...

Ji Mian felt a little regretful for his impulsive behavior.

Because he couldn't enter Fu Chenyu's residential area, he could only wander downstairs.

After the third lap, Ji Mian heard Fu Chenyu's cold voice: "What are you doing here?"

Ji Mian turned his head and saw Fu Chenyu's appearance in the sunset.

His shadow was stretched out long, and his face had a familiar, cold expression.

"Fu Chenyu..." Ji Mian was deflated at this moment, his nose was completely sore, and tears immediately came to his eyes.

Fu Chenyu was a little frightened by this unexpected turn of events, but he still maintained his cool personality, and softened his tone a little: "Yeah."

Ji Mian almost burst into tears out of shame. He quickly swallowed his tears and took out the fox fountain pen from his pocket: "I bought a pen for you."

Fu Chenyu curled his fingers.

Ji Mian's voice was nasal, revealing a strong sense of grievance, as if there was also a hint of fear and apprehension. He pleaded softly, "Fu Chenyu, don't ignore me."

Don't ignore me, don't be him.

Fu Chenyu's hard-hearted heart, which had been cold for a month, collapsed in the face of the boy's grievance, and he was so broken that he couldn't even put it back together.