He chose to stand in the highest and brightest place

The check was like a red-hot iron, burning Shen Yu's fingertips and even more so his heart. Every word in that letter, so calm and cruel, was like the sharpest ice blade, shattering his carefully constructed dream into pieces.

He wandered around the empty, cold apartment like a hollow shell with his soul sucked out. Traces of her were everywhere, and her fragrance seemed to linger in the air, but she had completely vanished from his world, as if she had evaporated from the face of the earth.

He didn't eat or drink, but just hugged the old rabbit doll, huddled in the corner, and dialed the number that would never be connected over and over again until his phone ran out of battery.

Why?

Had he done something wrong? Was he not well behaved or obedient enough? Or... from the beginning to the end, was he really just a toy she had bought with money, to be discarded at will once the novelty wore off?

The immense pain and sense of betrayal washed over him like a tsunami, followed by deep self-doubt and devastating despair. The person he had worshipped as a deity, to whom he had devoted everything, had ultimately dismissed him with a check and a few words. It turned out that all his love, dependence, and visions of the future were, in her eyes, nothing more than a childish game.

The offer and the future lost their meaning. The world collapsed before his eyes.

He fell into a long period of decline. Alcohol and sleeping pills became his only solace. His apartment was filled with empty bottles and the smell of stale takeout boxes. He isolated himself and refused all contact with the outside world.

…

One afternoon, hungover, he woke up with a splitting headache and turned on the TV, trying to dispel the dead silence with its clamor. A star-studded awards ceremony was playing on the screen. Spotlights flashed, fans cheered frantically, and the top stars standing center stage, enjoying the spotlight and the spotlight.

A twisted thought sprouted like poison ivy from the ruins of despair.

Didn't she want to disappear? Didn't she want to see him again?

He just won’t!

She wanted him to disappear, but he insisted on standing in the highest and brightest place, so bright that she couldn't ignore him no matter what! He wanted her to see his face as soon as she looked up! He wanted to make her regret it!

A driving force, brimming with hatred and obsession, propelled him from the mire. He discarded his bottle of wine and pills and embarked on a frantic workout. With his impeccable looks, a relentless drive, and the slight buzz his prestigious school background brought him, he resolutely plunged into the complex world of entertainment. With no connections, no backers, only a lone courage and a heart ravaged by pain.

He climbed up from the bottom. Playing minor roles, playing corpses, double-dotting for big stars, putting on a brave face at the dinner table, being harassed by directors, ostracized by his peers, and treated as a pawn by the capitalists. He was oppressed to the point of suffocation. Countless times, he broke down and cried to that old stuffed rabbit late at night, only to calm down, wipe away his tears, and the next day, continue to put on a perfect mask and strive for every tiny opportunity.

He is well aware of his strengths and knows how to use his good looks as a weapon, and the vulnerability he occasionally reveals in front of the camera is captivating.

He desperately climbed up, never looking back even if he fell and was bleeding. Every setback, every humiliation, made him want to stand at the top and let her see him more.

…

In the second year that Shen Yu entered the entertainment industry, she was like a plant thrown casually into a crevice, struggling to find a ray of light.

He desperately wanted to be famous, to be seen, and to ensure that the person far away overseas could not ignore his existence. This almost paranoid desire supported him through every day and night.

In fact, his exquisite appearance makes him easy to remember, and his acting skills are also okay, but he lacks a suitable role.

That day, he received an invitation.

The invitation came from director Chen Yan, a maverick in the film industry whose work is known for its extremely decadent aesthetic. His films don't usually become box office hits, but each one creates a stir among specific audiences and critics.

Director Chen's new project is an art film based on a tragic true story. It tells the story of a boy with a crystal-clear heart and a gender identity disorder, and his brief yet profound love affair with a female photographer visiting a rural village. Their mutual attraction is ultimately forced apart by worldly prejudice, and the story ends with the boy's self-destruction.

Director Chen happened upon a scene of Shen Yu in a low-budget production by chance. The young man in the scene had clear eyes, yet a sense of loneliness and fragility, as if abandoned by the world. This scene instantly struck Director Chen's core aesthetic. He felt that this was the "A Ning" he had been searching for.

However, even after the invitation was extended, Director Chen was somewhat hesitant. He knew how challenging the role would be both physically and psychologically for the actor—he would have to wear women's clothing, grow long hair, and portray a beauty and pain that blurred gender. Many young male actors avoided this role.

Unexpectedly, after reading the script carefully, Shen Yu took on the role without much hesitation.

His reasons were incredibly practical, even a bit utilitarian to the point of being heartbreaking: "Director Chen, thank you for giving me this opportunity. I'm willing to act. Wearing a skirt and long hair is no problem. I know this type of subject matter might not be a hit, but at least... it should be a buzzword, right? Being a black and a red is also being a red. I need to be seen right now."

He made no secret of his desire to be famous, and this naked ambition surprised Director Chen, but also piqued his interest. He had seen too many actors who whitewashed their shortcomings, but Shen Yu's frankness, with ambition written all over his face, was rare.

After joining the crew, Shen Yu almost completely shattered himself and integrated into the soul of "A Ning". He grew his hair long and imitated the feminine posture, more deeply experiencing the loneliness of being out of tune with the world and the struggle for self-identity, as well as the joy and despair after meeting the only lover who understood him.

The costumes included many dresses, soft in texture and plain in color. When he put them on for the first time and stood before the mirror, the person reflected in the mirror seemed both familiar and unfamiliar, beautiful yet fragile. For a moment, he seemed to see the woman who had always been calm and composed through the mirror. He wondered how she would react to seeing him like this. Would she find it strange? Would she find it novel? Would she miss him even a little?

The atmosphere on set was oppressive. Director Chen pursued extreme authenticity and emotional intensity, repeatedly polishing many scenes and demanding the actors' heartfelt expressions. Shen Yu's performance was almost self-torturing. This was especially true in the final, desperate suicide scene, where he stood on the rooftop in a skirt for an entire morning. The cold wind made his frail body shiver, and the emptiness and determination in his eyes made everyone on set hold their breath. When the director called "cut," he remained unable to break free for a long time, curled up in a corner, and silently wept. The overwhelming sadness and powerlessness almost drained him.

Director Chen watched the playback on the monitor, then looked at the young man immersed in the character's pain, took a deep breath, and said to those around him: "This kid is risking his life in this performance."

After a whole year of polishing, post-production and waiting, the movie "Spring Passes" was finally released in the spring of the following year, at a somewhat quiet time slot.

Initial screenings weren't ideal, and publicity was limited. However, audiences who entered the theaters were unanimously captivated. The film's stunningly beautiful visuals, heartbreaking story, and Shen Yu's eyes, loaded with so much emotion and seemingly capable of speaking, quickly gained traction through word of mouth.

A lot of discussions and spontaneous recommendations began to appear on social media.

"'The Passing of Spring' made me cry to death! Shen Yu's performance as Aning is absolutely amazing!"

"That's not acting, that's Aning herself!"

"How can he look so beautiful and yet so heartbreaking in a skirt!"

"How can I stand still when a new wife appears?"

"The aftereffects were so strong that I still feel uncomfortable after watching it."

The film's popularity continued to rise, and screenings increased accordingly. More and more people went to the cinema, shedding tears for this beautiful yet tragic story. For the first time, Shen Yu's name was widely mentioned and recognized for her truly moving performance.

On the night of the Golden Plume Award ceremony, Shen Yu wore the simplest black suit and sat in an inconspicuous position in the audience. When the award presenter read out the "Best Newcomer Award - Spring Passes, Shen Yu", the audience applauded.

The spotlight shone on him, and he was momentarily dazed. He stood up, and every step toward the stage felt like walking on clouds. His hands trembled slightly as he took the heavy trophy.

He stood before the microphone, looking at the countless faces in the audience, the lights a bit glaring. He routinely thanked the director, the crew, the company... Then, his gaze seemed to penetrate the camera and gaze into the unknown distance.

"...Finally," his voice was a little hoarse, but unusually clear, "I will continue to work hard. I will stand in the highest and brightest place for you to see."

He said nothing more and bowed and left the stage.

At that moment, countless people applauded him and shed tears for the boy who remained in the movie.