117. 117 Less guilt

Ning Jin went to the Northwest alone. After getting off the train, he went to the post office to ask if anyone had come to pick up the mail for the staff who were planting trees and grass in the desert. He learned that they would come the next day, so he stayed at a guesthouse nearby for one night.

"Hello comrade, are you planting trees and grass in the desert? Do you know Su Yu?" He leaned over the jeep and struck up a conversation with Engineer Lü.

"Who are you?"

"I am Su Yu's husband. My name is Ning Jin, and I'm a truck driver. I had some free time at work these past few days, so I thought I'd come and see her," Ning Jin explained in detail, afraid the man wouldn't believe him.

He believed most of it when he mentioned that the truck driver was Engineer Lü, but to prevent any bad people from sneaking into the desert, he still needed to confirm: "I heard Section Chief Su mention you. She said her husband has been driving for over ten years and is a very steady driver who has never had an accident. But if you want to come in with me, you should show me your letter of introduction."

Ning Jin couldn't produce a letter of introduction; what he did produce was a work certificate issued by the factory for them as truck drivers. With this certificate, he could travel around freely.

"You guys are quite wary, but being wary makes you safer."

"Come with me, I still need to fetch drinking water." Engineer Lü returned his work certificate to him and sat in the car, constantly scrutinizing the man. Su Yu had been here for three or four years, and all he knew was that she went out to visit her family every month. He knew that her two sons were pursuing master's degrees and that her husband was a truck driver, but he had never met any of her family members.

"I heard you're from the South, and you're quite tall," said Engineer Lü.

“I’m not from the South, I’m from the central region, the middle and lower reaches of the Yangtze River, which is very far from the South,” Ning Jin explained. In the South, some people call him a Northerner, and in the North, some people call him a Southerner. Sometimes when he mentions his province or city, many people have never even heard of it, but when he mentions the middle and lower reaches of the Yangtze River, they have a general idea of ​​where it is.

"Moreover, there are also tall people in the South. I often travel between the North and South and have seen quite a few tall people, although there are not as many as in the North."

Ning Jin had read fewer books than Lü Gong, but compared to Lü Gong, who had spent half his life stationed in the Northwest desert, he had traveled all over the country and seen much more. The two got along quite well, especially since they were both drivers. Halfway through the journey, Lü Gong even gave up the driver's seat for Ning Jin to drive while he sat to the side and gave directions.

We can see the residential area now. Engineer Lü said admiringly, "Ningjin, your driving skills are pretty good, and you're great at recognizing directions. If you came here, even I, your driver, would have to give way to you."

Ning Jin's expression shifted at that moment, and he had a slight idea in mind. However, after spending two days in the desert and discovering that Engineer Lü was going to join the main group to plant trees and grass and bury straw in the sand, he gave up the idea.

"How are you feeling?" Su Yu asked him.

Ning Jin swallowed hard, the dryness in his throat making him want to cough. "It's so dry, the wind is strong, and the sun is blazing. I feel like my exposed skin is going to burst open." He knew the environment and climate here were bad before he came, but he didn't expect it to be this bad. He couldn't help but look at Su Yu. It seemed that she really liked this job. She had been here for three or four years and he had never seen her complain.

He took back what he had told Ping An the day before yesterday. She wasn't the type of person who would get bored if she stayed in one place for too long. Her listlessness during the last two years of working in the orchard was probably because she didn't like the job.

Su Yu looked at the green in the distance. The clusters of green were separated by a lot, as if the wind had scattered the seeds and they had sprouted by chance, and there was no trace of anyone having touched them.

“It’s much better now. The wind carries far less sand, and when it rains, the moist air has the fresh, green scent of plant sap.” As they walked, Su Yu pointed out tiny brown grasses, barely half a finger long and clinging to the cracked sand, and said, “The shrubs here were planted by us, but the grass wasn’t. The grass grew gradually over the years.”

"They don't look like them at all; they all look like wild ones."

"Right, we've basically let go of this area now. The shrubs have taken root, and the ecological cycle is half formed. Maybe rabbits will appear here in three years."

"And then what?" Ning Jin asked, "Will you move away once you're cured here?" He thought that given her current wild nature, which she had gotten used to in the desert, it was impossible for her to go back to sitting in an office.

"Come with me." Su Yu led him in another direction. After walking for more than half an hour, the cracked sandy land turned into a layer of fine sand. There was no grass growing here, only clumps of half-green and half-yellow wormwood growing strangely, about half a leg tall. The further they went, the fine sand covered the soles of their shoes and even the tops of their shoes. The sand was half a finger deep. Even if grass seeds sprouted, they would be buried in the sand and never see the sun.

"Have you ever seen the terraced fields in the south?" she asked.

"I've seen it, and you've seen it too. We went to the south to pick up fruit in the winter, and the fields there are terraced fields."

"Let me show you our northern 'terraced fields'." Su Yu led him further into the desert, and Ning Jin noticed that the wild wormwood he had seen earlier was becoming increasingly strange in shape, sticking out its claws and claws.

"Look, doesn't it look like terraced fields in the south?"

The man looked in the direction she was pointing. The straw stalks divided the sandy land into small plots like field ridges. The whole undulating desert looked like a scaled-down version of the terraced fields in the south, with delicate seedlings planted in the terraces.

"You guys did all this?" He couldn't find the right word to describe it, only "done." The withered yellow straw and yellowish-brown sand made his eyes dizzy; the area was too large, and he couldn't find the end.

"How about that? Shocking, isn't it? Do you want to come closer and take a look? There are surviving plants in every sandy area here." Su Yu was eager to lead him over and show him her achievements over the years.

She's like Xiaoyuan when she first started school, getting perfect scores on both tests. She wants to show it off and get praise from her parents, but she also has a reserved pride. She wants to show off but doesn't want to reveal her true feelings. She wants the adults to notice and praise her sincerely.

“Look, why don’t you look? There’s a lot of my wife’s sweat in this sand.” Ning Jin first lifted his foot and walked over there. When he got closer, he stomped his foot, took off his shoes and poured out the sand, saying, “The sand here is harder, so the shoes won’t sink into it.”

Su Yu linked arms with him and explained that the sand dunes made of straw could reduce the amount of sand swept up from the ground when the sandstorm blew, making the ground harder. After each rain, someone would come to check on the situation, and this large sand dune had already been built before she arrived. People walked back and forth here every day, every month, and every year, which made the sand-covered ground more solid.

They walked from afternoon until dusk, then walked back hand in hand. On the way, Ningjin asked her what she thought about Ping An wanting to join the army.

Based on what Ping An wrote in the letter, Su Yu guessed that he would likely work in the national military industry after graduation. If he was capable enough, the work he would be involved in would all be classified. "That's good. It's what the child wants. It just means I won't see him much, but as long as his future wife doesn't care, we have nothing to say. I support him in pursuing the work he likes," she said.

"Then you should reply to him as soon as possible. He's probably still waiting. I told him you would definitely support me, but he doesn't seem to have taken it to heart." Ning Jin could already see the houses and the rising smoke from their chimneys. She wanted to say something, but she didn't say it.

"By the way, when are you leaving?" Su Yu smelled the aroma of food, stopped and looked him over suspiciously, "You haven't set foot in the Northwest for three or four years, why did you suddenly come without saying goodbye? And when you came, you were like a hungry wolf, eating me until my legs were sore, what kind of shock did you experience out there?"

"You're also urging me to leave." The man lowered his eyes and sighed, "I was driven away by Ping An. You drove me here, and I haven't even been here for two days before you're kicking me out too. I'm not a homeless person."

Su Yu watched his performance with her arms crossed.

"Say something!" he urged her to give him a response.

“A homeless person is someone who roams the world, you can’t compare to that.” She raised an eyebrow at him, kicked him with her toe, and pressed, “Answer honestly, have you done something to wrong me?” She glanced down at him again.

"Don't wrong me. You don't pity me, but you're framing me instead." Ning Jin frowned and thought for a moment, then said vaguely, "I read two erotic books that young people like, which broadened my horizons. I wanted to try out the new positions I learned with you."

"How was it? Satisfied? I haven't used up all the moves I learned yet, so don't rush me away." He put his arm around her shoulder and gave her a suggestive bump, confirming, "You're very satisfied, I can tell."

Su Yu smiled, then coughed involuntarily. Her skills had improved dramatically in the previous two nights, and she had suspected that he had gone for further training, but she never expected that he had taken a ride on Ping An's Dongfeng Express.

"He wants to kick you out just because of Ping An? Does he have a thick skin?" She nudged him lightly with her elbow; he definitely hadn't told the whole story.

“Don’t let his thick skin fool you when he’s joking around; he was genuinely embarrassed this time, which I didn’t expect.” Ning Jin recalled Ping An’s reaction at the time and instructed her, “We’ve already said it today, so don’t mention it again. Just pretend you never heard of it, or I suspect he won’t dare to come home for at least three to five years.”

"Okay, go ahead."

“I bought him condoms, took him to buy them, and we even had a friendly discussion about his requirements for dating before marriage. Oh, and I also sent a letter to Xiaoyuan, along with four condoms, so they could both try on the sizes.” He looked at her. “I did the right thing, didn’t I?”

"That's absolutely right." Su Yu gave him a thumbs up. What a great dad, even giving his son sex education. She felt that he was quite bold and open-minded about this. For example, many years ago, when he was just starting to use condoms, he was okay with letting his two children play with used condoms like balloons.

“If Ping An still remembers what happened when he was eight or nine, he’ll realize what those balloons he blew up with Xiao Yuan were all about back then,” she said with a hint of amusement, suggesting his embarrassment at the thought.

Ping An hadn't actually thought of it, but Xiao Yuan reminded him. When Xiao Yuan received the letter, he didn't immediately take out the foreign goods inside the envelope. After reading the letter, he was even more afraid to take it out. He only took it out when he got back to the dormitory and stuffed it deep into the closet as if it were too hot to handle.

Later, Ping An wrote to show off the large size that suited him, and subtly asked Xiao Yuan: "I already know where to buy this. Do you need me to send you more? Give me your size. I use the large size, and I don't know if it's too big for you."

Xiao Yuan returned to his dormitory, rummaged through his closet, and pulled out a small bag. After carefully reading the English description on it, he finally understood the meaning of "peace and safety".

"Childish," he chuckled, but couldn't resist the urge to tear open the packaging and carefully compare the contents. Finding the packaging slippery, he washed his hands. Water seeped into the casing, and the strange shapes evoked childhood memories.

He wrote to say that he didn't need it for the time being and didn't want him to buy it and send it to him. Then he subtly suggested that this thing wasn't rare and that hospitals should sell it. He said that he and his wife had seen it when they were eight or nine years old and that it should be hanging on the roots of some tree now.

When Ping An saw the letter, he was taken aback. He counted on his fingers the year he first planted the tree, and then he remembered that he had been making a fuss at home about not letting his parents have any more children, which must have been in 1972.

"I got beaten up for nothing." He banged his head in frustration. His parents had been using contraception from the beginning, which meant they didn't want any more children. "Sigh, if I had talked to them nicely back then, maybe we could have resolved things peacefully."

Knowing this relieved him of a burden. He realized how ridiculous it was to cry and beg his parents not to have any more children when he was young and didn't understand things. Two people, each with a son, forming a family, are very likely to break up if the children don't get along or if their relationship sours, and they don't have any biological children to hold them together.

Ever since he was old enough to understand, he had been worried that his parents would have different intentions, so he had been trying to get along well with Xiaoyuan, hoping to keep his parents, who were never home, by him and Xiaoyuan.

I still have worries, but I feel less guilty. It seems that there should only be four people in their family. Even if I hadn't interfered more than ten years ago, it's unlikely that there would be five people in their family.