I could hear my mother Wang Xiulan's light footsteps outside the window; she had already gotten up and started preparing breakfast.

Su Mingqiang knew that his mother would specially cook him a bowl of calming red date porridge every day, but he never told her that it was of no use.

He got out of bed quietly, not wanting to disturb his family.

The person in the mirror looked pale, with sunken eyes, and looked more than ten years older than before they went to prison.

Su Mingqiang washed his face with cold water, trying to clear his mind, but the images from prison kept replaying in his mind.

The dark solitary confinement cell, the guards' batons, the stench of the septic tank...

"Mingqiang, are you up yet?"

The voice of her father, Su Jianguo, came from outside the door.

"Get up."

Su Mingqiang stood up straight as if by reflex, just like when he heard the prison guard call his name in prison.

Su Jianguo pushed open the door and entered. Seeing his son's haggard appearance, he frowned slightly.

"Didn't sleep well again?"

"good."

Su Mingqiang lowered his head and made the bed, avoiding his father's gaze.

He knew his father had sacrificed a lot for him, and because of that, he felt even more ashamed to face Su Jianguo.

The betrayal in prison was like a wall separating him from his family.

At the breakfast table, Su Jianguo tried to liven up the atmosphere.

"Mingqiang, would you like to come with me to the vegetable base today? The newly cultivated cucumber variety is growing quite well."

Su Mingqiang mechanically stirred the porridge in the bowl.

"I...I'd better stay home and help my little sister."

Wang Xiulan quickly replied.

"Yes, yes, it's good to be at home. Mingqiang helps Yuzhen make tofu; he's really good at it."

Su Jianguo hesitated for a moment, then finally just sighed.

Since his son came back, he has tried various methods to help his son get back on his feet, but all have been to little avail.

Su Mingqiang was like an empty shell, showing no interest in anything.

After dinner, Su Jianguo patted his son on the shoulder before leaving the house.

"Just let me know if you need anything."

Su Mingqiang nodded. After his father left, he helped his mother clear the dishes, his movements mechanical and precise.

These are the marks left by prison life; every item must be placed in a fixed location.

"Mingqiang, go and rest. I can handle these."

Wang Xiulan looked at her son with heartache.

"It's okay, Mom."

Su Mingqiang forced a smile.

"I...I want to go for a walk."

Wang Xiulan's eyes lit up.

"Okay, going out for some fresh air is good for your health. Do you want Yuzhen to come with you?"

"No need, I'm just taking a walk."

Su Mingqiang quickly refused.

He did have a plan, but it wasn't the kind of aimless stroll his mother imagined.

After his mother went to the shop, Su Mingqiang quietly slipped out of the house and headed straight for the cemetery on the outskirts of the city.

He needed to find Li Jinhua's grave, something he had been wanting to do since his release from prison.

The cemetery caretaker was an elderly man wearing reading glasses, searching through the register.

"Li Jinhua? I don't remember her... When was she buried?"

"About... half a year ago?"

Su Mingqiang said uncertainly.

When he learned of Li Jinhua's death while he was in prison, she had already been buried for some time.

The old man shook his head.

"We received so many unidentified corpses during that period that we didn't keep detailed records of many of them. Do you know which district they were in?"

Su Mingqiang's heart sank.

"N-no...I don't know."

"Then it will be hard to find."

The old man looked at him with pity.

"Why don't you go check out the unclaimed area? Those are all unclaimed bodies buried there."

Su Mingqiang thanked the old man and walked alone to the most secluded corner of the cemetery.

The tombstones here are much simpler, many don't even have names, just a number.

He examined each piece one by one, hoping to find some clue.

As the sun gradually set in the west, Su Mingqiang's legs were numb from walking, and his eyes ached from staring at the tombstone for so long.

But he still couldn't find any trace of Li Jinhua.

Finally, he slumped down beside an unmarked monument, tears streaming silently down his face.

"Jin Hua...I'm so sorry..."

He muttered to himself.

"We can't even find a place for you to rest in peace..."

A gust of wind blew by, swirling up a few withered leaves, as if in silent response to him.

Su Mingqiang hugged his arms tightly, feeling an unprecedented loneliness.

It was already dark when I got home.

Wang Xiulan waited anxiously at the door.

"Mingqiang! Where have you been? We've been looking everywhere for you!"

"I'm sorry, Mom... I've gone far away."

Su Mingqiang lowered his head, not wanting his mother to see his red and swollen eyes.

Su Jianguo came out of the house with a solemn expression.

"Let's go inside."

At dinner, Su Mingqiang barely touched his chopsticks. Su Jianguo and Wang Xiulan exchanged a worried glance.

"Mingqiang."

Su Jianguo put down his chopsticks.

"I know you've been having a tough time lately. If there's anything bothering you, you can talk to us about it."

"Dad...Mom...I want to be alone for a while."

Su Mingqiang got up and went back to his room, leaving his parents looking at each other in bewilderment.

In the room, Su Mingqiang curled up on the bed, his mind filled with images of Li Jinhua before her death.

He remembered the first time they met; she was standing at the school gate wearing a light blue dress.

He remembered that when she was pregnant, he would bring her her favorite roasted chestnuts every day after get off work.

I remember the scene when they named their child together...

These memories were like knives tearing at his heart.

Finally, Su Mingqiang drifted off to sleep amidst his tears, only to fall back into that familiar nightmare.

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