remember

The morning glories on the fence were in full bloom, bathed in the morning light, their blue-purple blossoms swaying in the breeze. The sun was shining brightly today, its warm rays illuminating the person sitting in a deck chair listening to music.

"I wish I could become the angel you love in a fairy tale, spreading my arms to become wings to protect you..."

This song has been played on repeat countless times in her playlist.

But no matter what, she still felt that it wasn't as good as the song that Meng Chou sang for her back then.

"Mom, why are you here again?"

Yu Xi looked back and saw that Meng Qingze was no longer the child who hid behind her. Now he was taller than her and could truly protect her.

Her once beautiful hair had turned silver-gray, the fine lines on her face were the marks of time, her voice had become hoarse, she was no longer the spirited woman she once was, and her memory was getting worse.

She turned around and looked back, remaining silent for a long time, while the song on her phone continued to play.

Aging made her body stiff and her movements slow, making every step difficult.

"Mom, do you remember who I am?"

Seeing that she hadn't spoken for a long time, Meng Qingze cautiously asked.

Yu Xi smiled and patted his back, "My son, how could I not remember?"

"Oh, what am I supposed to do next?" She really couldn't remember what she was supposed to do next. Before Meng Qingze could answer, she added, "Today is your dad's birthday. Take me to see him."

Meng Qingze laughed and said, "Mom, you can forget everything, but you can't forget my dad's birthday, or my dad himself."

As he spoke, a hint of sadness in his voice, he sniffed and glanced away.

Yu Xi straightened her clothes. No matter how old she got, she always made sure she lived beautifully and dignifiedly, and her spirit was in no way inferior to Meng Qingze and the others.

"Yes, I will definitely remember those."

"I've been doing this for almost my whole life, haven't I?"

Meng Qingze took her hand. Ever since he could remember, he knew that Yu Xi would always visit him on Meng Chou's birthday. She would always go to the cemetery alone with a birthday cake and stay for a while.

Now, she can no longer go alone. She's also afraid that after she leaves, he'll be busy with business and neglect Meng Chou's birthday, so she always gives him a lot of instructions.

Yu Xi knew her health was deteriorating day by day. She followed Meng Qingze back to the living room, and just as she put down her phone and turned to get the medicine, she froze and asked, "Zeze, Mom forgot how many pills to take?"

“I can take care of these. If I’m not working from home, you can ask the housekeeper to help you.” Meng Qingze skillfully picked up the medicine box and took out a bag of medicine that she had packaged herself.

Knowing that Yu Xi would forget these things, he had already thoughtfully divided the pills and put them back in the medicine box, but Yu Xi would still forget that he had done these things.

He was never impatient; he was just afraid that one day, Yu Xi would forget him altogether.

"How's everything at the company lately?" Yu Xi quickly changed the subject and asked.

Meng Qingze handed her the hot water that had been poured, saying, "Everything is fine. My mother took such good care of it when she was young, so it's naturally much easier for me to manage it."

"Besides, there are the connections left by Grandpa, Mom, you don't need to worry about business matters."

"Your main task now is to take good care of your health. If you want to go out and travel, I can also ask Auntie to take you to different places."

Yu Xi shook her head. "I'm not leaving. Your dad is here. I'm not going anywhere."

She started looking for her phone, which she had just put down, but then forgot where she had put it. "Where's my phone? It was just here, and I hadn't finished listening to my song."

Meng Qingze pulled out her phone from behind the cushion and handed it to her. The screen was still lit up, and the song she had listened to on repeat was still playing.

He glanced at it; it was the tune he knew best.

After he learned to play the piano, he would always play this piece that Meng Chou had once played for Yu Xi in order to make her happy.

Many times, when Yu Xi wanted to give up, she would be moved by this song, remember the promise she had made to Meng Chou, and looking at his child, she would rekindle her hope for life.

Yu Xi swallowed the pills in one gulp, then turned to Meng Qingze and said, "Let me get some things, then we'll set off."

"Remember to bring the cake you bought for your dad, and tell Qiqi that we're going out so she won't worry."

Meng Qingze replied, "Okay."

The Qiqi that Yu Xi mentioned is his wife, the little tyrant he's known since elementary school.

After he started his own family, he finally understood Yu Xi's persistence.

—

The car traveled over the overpass and gradually drove into the sparsely populated suburbs. The scenery outside the car window changed from high-rise buildings of steel and concrete to towering hills. As far as the eye could see, the mountains were covered with lush greenery, and even the air was filled with the scent of grass.

“Zeze, you may not believe it. Actually, after your father passed away, I also saw him, but he came back to see me under a different identity.”

"What a coward, he doesn't even dare to come to me in his original form."

Meng Qingze recalled his childhood memories. In his memory, besides Meng Yun, there was also a person named Chen Miao.

This person's time with him was very short. Not long after, just like Meng Chou, he said that he had to go out for work and could no longer accompany him.

He remembers feeling very wronged at that time. He would write to Chen Miao every week and received many replies from Chen Miao, but he never saw Chen Miao again.

When he guessed that the Chen Miao that Yu Xi mentioned might be Meng Chou, he slammed on the brakes. The car, which was driving normally, suddenly braked hard, and both Yu Xi and he were thrown forward by inertia.

"So, you already knew all along that Sanshui-gege was Dad. You knew all along, didn't you?" Meng Qingze asked in amazement, somewhat incredulous.

The person I had been longing to meet had actually been by my side in a different capacity from the very beginning.

But people can't come back to life after they die, so how could such a thing happen?

Now, even he himself couldn't explain this memory.

"But how could that be? My dad isn't..."

Looking out the window at the endless mountains, Yu Xi said, "I really want to know, and I'm even starting to believe that ghosts and gods really exist in this world."

"But he never came back after I chased him away. I think he must still resent me, and he never showed up again."

"Zeze, Mommy isn't afraid of ghosts. I'm just afraid I'll never see him again."

As Yu Xi spoke, tears welled up in her eyes, and her vision became even more blurred. She still regretted driving him away that day, but then she thought that at that time she was not strong enough to fight against Sun Shuhan and Gu Yuan. If she had kept him, they might have made things difficult for Meng Chou again.

There are many things that cannot be judged as right or wrong!

"Mom, do you remember the time I accidentally ate ginkgo buds and got poisoned?"

Yu Xi raised her hand and quietly wiped away the tears from the corner of her eyes. "Why are we talking about that again?"

“I think I saw my dad during that surgery.”

“I only vaguely remember that he came to see me,” Meng Qingze said, restarting the car. “He told me that he wanted to live a good life with you and that I should take good care of you.”

He also said that he has always loved you.

Meng Qingze pieced together these fragmented memories, while Yu Xi listened from the back row, feeling her heart grow increasingly painful, almost to the point of being unable to breathe.

She didn't answer, but silently wiped away the tears from the corners of her eyes again and again.

The car stopped in front of He'an Cemetery. While Meng Qingze went to get the cake, she slowly walked towards the cemetery, carrying a rusty iron box in her arms.

She walked this path repeatedly throughout the rest of her life. She knew it so well that even with her confused memories, she still knew how to proceed.

The photo in front of him is exactly the same as it was thirty years ago. His life stopped at the age of twenty-two, but Yu Xi's love for him has continued to this day.

As always, Yu Xi took out a handkerchief and wiped the photo. "Look at you, you're still so young. I've gotten so old that you wouldn't recognize me."

"I still want to talk about you; you still refuse to come into my dreams and see me even once."

Yu Xi put away the handkerchief and opened the rusty iron box with trembling hands. "But I couldn't bear to throw away any of the things you gave me. The Big Eyes keychain no longer makes a sound. The battery is dead, and even after I changed it, it still doesn't work. It's broken."

"It's become so hard to hear your voice again!"

"I've kept this Talking Tom keychain and the Hello Kitty with the torn hem."

Yu Xi slowly put down these things and looked at the person in the photo. "Did you think I didn't know? When you brought that stone doll home, I was certain that Chen Miao was you."

"Actually, you're not a good fake at all. You've given yourself away in many ways, but I've never dared to recognize him as you, and you're unwilling to admit it."

"If you do this again next time, I will really ignore you when I see you after I die."

As soon as Yu Xi finished speaking, Meng Qingze lit the candles on the cake he had brought.

The weather was overcast and windless today, so it wasn't particularly cold.

The weather was exactly the same as when she first met Chen Miao, except that there would never be a ghost suddenly appearing and asking curiously if she would come to celebrate his birthday every year.

"Mom, I think Dad can hear what you're saying. He can hear it."

As Meng Qingze spoke, he saw Yu Xi look up at him again with a hint of doubt in her eyes, "Who are you?"

He knew that Yu Xi didn't remember him again, and said with a wry smile, "Mom, I'm Zeze, your son."

Yu Xi shook her head and gestured, "No, my son is only five years old this year, not as old as you. Stop lying to me."

"Mom, do you still remember what you came here to do?" he asked.

Without hesitation, Yu Xi replied, "Of course it's for A Chou's birthday."

She pointed to the cake on the ground and the people in the photos, and suddenly, in her hazy mind, the scene of the car accident that day flashed back. She grabbed Meng Qingze's hand, "Save him, please save him."

"My butterfly is about to leave me."

Yu Xi remembered the butterfly birthmark on Meng Chou's hand and cried as she spoke.

A gust of wind blew by, causing the burning birthday candles to flicker. Yu Xi's consciousness was also awakened by the wind. She abruptly let go of Meng Qingze's hand and said with some guilt, "Mom had another episode, didn't she? Did I scare you?"

Meng Qingze shook his head, took her hand, and slowly led her back.

"Mom, it's getting windy. Let's go back! I'll bring you to see Dad again next time."

"Okay, let's go! It's time to go back." Yu Xi held the iron box in one hand and pulled his hand with the other, walking slowly back with faltering steps.

On this ordinary winter afternoon, I didn't look back.

Unbeknownst to her, a butterfly flew out from behind her, landed on the cake, and lingered there for a long time.

It turned out that she had a vivid dream during her illness, in which she saw the person she had been longing for.

Or is the person she wants to see still there all along?

Things in this world are unpredictable. Some people love her year after year in places unseen by others.

The End —