Chapter 100 Don't say anything that hurts me anymore...

He Jing decided to leave.

He was not telling the truth.

When you truly love someone, you can't help but want to sacrifice for them.

Otherwise, why would he be here? He has never traveled such a long distance before, and it's so cold. If he were at home, he would only be wearing a robe right now, why would he need to be wrapped up like this?

It's not that I feel wronged, nor that I feel I'm not getting anything in return or that I'm losing out, so I'm unwilling to sacrifice for her anymore.

It's unnecessary.

There's simply no room for anyone else between the two of them.

His presence caused her distress.

So he backed down.

He didn't feel inferior to others, and even now he still looks down on Liu Min, thinking that she is unworthy of him, but she just likes him.

She blamed him for arriving too late; her heart was already full, leaving no room for anyone else, so no one had a chance.

Of course, it's not that he can't fight for her. She's just a weak woman, all alone and helpless. If she really wants it, she can get it if she's willing to use any means necessary.

But he's not a villain; he really wouldn't do something like bullying men or women.

And I really couldn't bear to see her get hurt.

She was willing to endure hardship with her lover, finding it sweet and comforting.

There's really nothing more to say.

He knew her; he was the most compassionate and righteous person in the world. She wouldn't give up on that person.

He respected her and was willing to support her noble ideals.

If you love her, you can't destroy her.

That's exactly what his opponent did; in order for her to have a good life, he kept pushing her away and forcing her to leave.

Since he looked down on this person, he was determined not to do worse than him.

When He Jing said he was leaving, Shan Lai couldn't help but breathe a sigh of relief.

She always saw him as a nuisance, even though he had helped her a lot and even saved her life. She still saw him as a nuisance, and it was getting bigger and bigger.

She can owe him money, but she can't owe him her feelings.

Money can be repaid, no matter what, but feelings are different. She can't give them, she has nothing to spare, so she can't accept his kindness towards her.

The more I suffer, the more guilty I feel.

It couldn't be better that he's willing to leave now.

"You should have listened to my advice and gone back a long time ago."

Although he had anticipated that she wouldn't say anything nice and had prepared himself for it, he still couldn't help but feel sad when he actually heard it.

He sighed, "Why can't you even say a polite word? You know perfectly well that it would make me happy."

Shanlai said, "I don't want to be polite to you, because it would make me feel like I'm doing something bad to you. Although you've caused me a lot of trouble, I still owe you a debt of gratitude and can't do that to you."

After she said that, He Jing fell silent.

Because my mind began to waver.

She is a really good person, and he really likes her very much.

Such a good person, he might never meet again. What will he do? Once you've seen the ocean, other waters seem insignificant!

But no matter how good it is, it's not his.

He doesn't have that blessing.

"If only I hadn't met you! My dad was right to scold me; he really ruined everything! My life is over!"

These two sentences were too harsh, and Shanlai didn't want to respond. He also didn't know what to say, so he asked Shanlai, "When are you leaving?"

"How can a woman as beautiful as you have such a hard heart!"

Despite his earnest appeals, she remained completely unmoved.

I don't know if she's truly too heartless, or if she loves someone too deeply, but she completely disregards everyone else.

A myriad of emotions welled up within me.

"I'm leaving right away, I really can't stay here any longer."

They show no mercy whatsoever.

"Have you packed everything? Do you have any money on you?"

He couldn't help but ask, "If I don't tidy up, will you tidy up for me?"

"No." Without the slightest hesitation, "I don't enjoy bullying others. I won't pack your things, but I will give you money. It's still a good time in the south, with clear skies and fresh air. As long as you bring enough money, you won't have to worry about anything. You are a capable person, so I don't need to worry about you."

“I don’t want your money. Although it’s said that gentlemen don’t speak ill of each other when breaking off relations, I still want to say that I really don’t appreciate your attitude that money can solve everything. So you are no longer so noble in my heart. Your heart is too cruel, and harder than a stone.”

He finally found a reason to comfort himself, even if it was just sophistry, at least he found one, otherwise he would be really unwilling to accept it.

"I'm leaving now, no need for you to see me off." With that, he pulled something from his person and tossed it at Shan Lai's feet. "Take this for self-defense! I'm not going to help you anymore, good luck from now on!"

It is a dagger, perfect for concealing somewhere on one's person, capable of causing unexpected harm.

This is very useful, and right now he needs it more than Shanlai, since he's traveling alone.

So Shanlai chased after him.

"Take this! Keep it safe." She forcefully shoved it into his hand, her tone leaving no room for refusal. "Be careful on the road, stay alert, and don't let anyone take advantage of you or fall into their trap... If you can, send me a letter when you get home so I know you're alright. Otherwise, I'll be worried sick and constantly thinking about you."

"Didn't I tell you not to bring me? Why did you come?"

You only said a couple of sentences, and I'm already feeling resentful again.

We have no choice but to leave quickly.

We can't afford to lose so badly and completely, losing all our dignity!

He would never be a petty person.

He didn't intend to say anything more to her, but the moment he held the reins in his hand, the feeling of parting became real, and he couldn't help but tell her the truth.

“If he dies one day, write to me and I will definitely come to pick you up. I think he has a short life ahead of him, and you will still need my help in the future.”

"What nonsense are you spouting! Do you believe I'll hit you?!"

Upon hearing this, he laughed heartily, "Let's go!" With that, he spurred his horse, turned it around, and rode south without looking back.

Although his words had greatly angered Shanlai, as he watched him leave, Shanlai sincerely prayed for him in his heart, wishing him a safe journey.

Once the men and horses were out of sight, Shanlai turned back.

Go find Xu Qian.

At night, Liu Min tossed and turned, unable to sleep.

Shanlai hadn't appeared before him for a long time. He pushed her and hurt her. She must be angry with him and ignoring him. Maybe she's with that annoying guy right now, and that annoying guy is following her like a fly that smells blood.

This was what he had hoped for: that Shanlai would ignore him and go back to her good life. But now that it had actually happened, he felt no relief.

His heart ached, his tongue tasted bitter, his eyes and nose stung, and he felt like insects were crawling all over his body—something even more unbearable than physical pain.

Shanlai really doesn't want him anymore; he'll be all alone from now on.

And Shanlai was still angry, and it's unknown whether she will forgive him in the future.

He wasn't actually that selfless; he just wanted to live a good life and didn't want her to be with other people, nor did he like her having eyes for others...

Shan Lai is clearly his...

At this point, one can't help but feel resentful.

Going back to the source, it's all his father's fault. He's truly unlucky to have such a father; he's been ruined by him! If it were someone else, he wouldn't be in this situation today. He wouldn't have had to be separated from his beloved, causing her so much heartache...

But then I thought, if it weren't for this father, I might never have met Shanlai.

So annoying.

He couldn't sleep at all.

He finally felt sleepy after the wind stopped and slowly drifted off to sleep.

When I woke up, I saw Shanlai.

I was so happy! My hands moved faster than my brain. By the time I realized what was happening, my hand was already on the back of her hand. Now that I'd come to my senses, I should have pulled my hand back immediately, but I couldn't bear to...

"You're not angry with me anymore, are you? I was really dizzy back then..."

It has a slightly nasal tone, and it sounds very aggrieved.

Shanlai ignored his words and simply informed him, "He Jing left yesterday, and Sister Xu and the others left this morning. You can't send me anywhere else."

"What?"

"I said, I'm all alone now. If you don't take care of me, I'll die here. Do you want me to die?"

Why did they all leave?

He panicked. There was no one around; what could she do?

"Of course it's because I don't want to travel with them. Lian Si, you're really the only one left..."

I'm so annoyed.

In this situation, there is joy, of course; Shanlai only likes him, no matter what he does, she will still only like him. But there is more worry than joy.

He didn't want her to suffer with him, so why bother? Endless suffering… He wanted her to leave, but now that it was happening, he realized he didn't mind her liking someone else; as long as she was happy, he'd do anything… But she was alone. Asking her to go back alone? How could he? How could he let her risk her life alone…

It seems there is no other way to go.

Do we really want to take her to suffer?

"Aren't you afraid at all? Why can't you stay in a good place and wait for me to come back to you? I've already told Qiguang to tell you that if I can go back, I will definitely come back to you, and that he should take good care of you..."

"You make it sound so easy for you to reassure me, but how can I be at ease? I'm a living, breathing person, with flesh and blood... Do you think I'm made of stone? Without feelings, without a heart that can't ache... Liansi, you can't be so selfish. When I left, I was certain you'd be better off without me... Now, where do you expect me to go? Even if it's exile, even if it's hell, I'll follow you. So stop saying things that hurt me. What's the point?"

Liu Min was speechless.

The three people became four. Two yamen runners drove one carriage, and Shanlai and Liu Min also drove another carriage. The two carriages were driven by two people in each carriage, taking turns to drive, in order to get to Wuyunwei as soon as possible.

The weather was good all the way; although it was cold, it never snowed again, and it was always sunny.

Because the road was easy to travel, we arrived at our destination by the end of October.

The two constables laughed and said, "This is all thanks to Miss Yao. Since Miss Yao came, the journey has been smooth sailing."

Shanlai did not answer, but smiled and looked at Liu Min, who frowned as he gazed at the imposing government office.

Shanlai gently squeezed his hand and whispered to him, "Don't be afraid, I will always be with you."

This sentence sounds familiar.

Recalling the past, Liu Min couldn't help but laugh.

Yeah, what's there to be afraid of?

"I'm not afraid."

He answered with these three words.

Liu Min followed two yamen runners into the government office and came out shortly afterward; everything went very smoothly.

The higher-ups had given prior notice, so everything was already arranged and they were just waiting for the person to arrive.

Liu Min was to go and guard the hay storage yard.

Two constables led Liu Min inside, explained their purpose and presented the official documents, but did not hand them over. Instead, they offered money and told the clerk who received them, "This is a friend of the young master of the Qi State Duke's family. He shouldn't be here right now, but the young master gave instructions before we left, so please be accommodating and collect the documents at a more appropriate time so we can finish our business. The young master is a relative of the governor."

How could we not give face to someone who is both a young master and a governor?

He then went to see his superiors, a deputy commander and three assistant commanders. They all greeted him as Young Master Liu, saying he must have come a long way and had a hard time. They said he should have sent word earlier so they could have gone out to greet him. They added that they didn't expect him to arrive so early; unfortunately, the commander was out on official business. Otherwise, their commander would have personally brought them to see Young Master Liu. However, they assured him that Young Master Liu need not worry, as the matter had already been taken care of. They said there was a hay storage area not far from the west gate, where he could temporarily settle down; it was a spacious and quiet place. Everything has been provided perfectly. When Young Master Liu arrives, he will be served without shortage of attendants. And since it's just outside the city, only a half-hour drive away, it won't be a problem if anything happens. It's also convenient for Young Master Liu to relax in the city when he has free time. But these are not urgent matters. We've already ordered a feast; let's welcome Young Master Liu here today. After he's rested, we'll take him for a stroll around the city so he can familiarize himself with the places and people, preventing any inconsiderate people from bumping into him. We can take him there when he's fully recovered…