Chapter 30 Peach Blossom Snow Mountain

[Butler, what flowers does Brother Chen like? (Frog rubbing its butt.gif)]

The housekeeper, who had returned to work, leaned against the car window with one hand and said without turning his head, "Young Master Fu asked what kind of flowers the gentleman likes."

“Sir should like anything that Young Master Fu sends. Does Young Master Fu want to send Mr. Fu flowers?” Assistant Xu asked with delight. “I’m happy for Mr. Fu, and I hope he can feel my happiness for him and give me some tangible reward.”

The butler said, "Wherever you are, the stench of mercenary greed permeates the air."

“I call this being genuine,” Assistant Xu smiled. “If you were so high and mighty, you wouldn’t be spending all your time at the seafood market. I look down on you.”

The housekeeper said, "Give back the money you were supposed to give as a gift."

Assistant Xu said seriously, "Being able to seize opportunities is also a skill. Earning money through ability, I acknowledge you."

The butler touched his lips with his finger, a sneer playing on his lips, and then typed a reply: "[Sir's favorite flower is rose. (Thumbs up.jpg)]"

"Rose?" Fu Yanle exited WeChat, turned around and went into the flower shop around the corner, saying with great fanfare, "I want to buy roses."

The owner, a young woman, was wearing an apron and pruning potted plants. Upon hearing the voice, she quickly went over to greet him. "We have sixteen kinds of roses here. Which one would you like, sir? Would you like to see a catalog? Or could you tell me who you're planning to give it to, and I can recommend one?"

As the boss spoke, he secretly sized up Fu Yanle.

Hmm, although he's wearing a beanie, a face mask, and sunglasses, making it impossible to discern his status, just based on his physique, his demeanor, his voice, and the perfume that reeks of money—this must be a high-quality human male!

But... why does it look so familiar?

Fu Yanle, oblivious to his surroundings, interrupted his boss who was studying him, saying, "191cm tall, golden ratio, eight-pack abs, perfect figure, fair skin, top-tier beauty, rich and capable, abstinent, cold, gentle, considerate, refined and elegant. The only flaw is that he is too perfect."

Damn! Does he no longer need to think before praising Yu Jingchen?

Fu Yanle secretly praised his own excellent flattery skills and outstanding aesthetic sense.

"...Huh?" The boss manually closed his mouth. "Ah!"

It turns out it was a gift for a high-quality boyfriend!

She smiled sincerely and said warmly, "Excuse my bluntness, but a person as outstanding as her needs 999 flowers to be worthy of her."

Fu Yanle believed him and readily pulled out a card, "Then I want 999 flowers now."

"Huh? Now? This is too sudden. We don't have that much stock. Can you wait a day? If you can't wait, that's fine too." The boss quickly opened the room and led Fu Yanle to the reception desk.

"You can become our VIP user for free. In addition to guaranteed quality and service, we also offer services such as flower delivery, confession on your behalf, singing love songs, writing love poems and cards, and purchasing Pampers or other adult products! Gentlemen, you can join us with confidence! Most importantly, our store really needs high-quality members like you!"

"Oh, I see. Okay then." Fu Yanle was touched by the last half of the sentence and added his nickname and phone number to the membership book. "I'll come to you again next time I have a big order. I'll just buy a little less today."

"Okay, dear!" the shopkeeper said solicitously. "Sir, do you need roses that match your partner's temperament?"

“Yes!” Fu Yanle said firmly, “I want the kind that is sweet, pure, and gentle.”

The boss clapped his hands and said, "Yes!"

*

An hour later, Fu Yanle, carrying Xiaohua, humming a little tune, took small steps, with Xiao Kuai on his head, and stepped into the main building of the Yu family.

Yu Jingchen was sitting on the sofa reading documents when he heard the noise and turned his head to look at Fu Yanle. His gaze fell from Fu Yanle's face to the bouquet of flowers in his arm.

The document in his hand was crumpled from his grip. Yu Jingchen looked away, his breathing becoming slightly heavy.

Fu Yanle also stopped in place, his ten toes gripping the ground—

Damn! Why isn't Brother Chen in the study but downstairs? He hasn't prepared his speech for delivering the flowers yet!

The document was almost crushed to pieces, but Fu Yanle didn't utter a sound. Yu Jingchen turned his head again and saw that Fu Yanle's face showed three parts panic, three parts helplessness, three parts guilt, and one part shyness. He couldn't help but say coldly, "Did Su Fengyao send you flowers again?"

Gu Jiming is indeed still young; he went too far.

"Pah! Pah! Ugh!" The fan-shaped expression on Fu Yanle's face instantly transformed into a simple pie chart, his disgust level reaching 100%. He wished he could conjure up a row of braziers and, hand in hand with Yu Jingchen, slap his mother a hundred times.

"...That's good." Yu Jingchen composed himself, his tone remaining normal. "Who sent you flowers?"

"Of course, it's the most handsome, best-looking, most elegant, cutest, most charismatic, most arrogant, most devilishly charming, and most likable in the universe—"

A sharp crackling sound mercilessly interrupted Fu Yanle's chanting.

Yu Jingchen withdrew his toes, not even glancing at the innocent teacups that had shattered on the floor.

"Oh my God!" Fu Yanle floated gracefully to Yu Jingchen's side. "Brother Chen, don't think I didn't notice your mischievous little feet! Why are you so irritable? Did you accidentally eat some gunpowder? Or are you in a bad mood?"

Yu Jingchen didn't answer the question, but asked again, "Who sent you flowers? Ditch the fancy and empty prefixes and just tell me the name."

"What? Showy and impractical? You dare say these words are false adjectives!"

If it weren't for the fact that the height of the main building, human height, and Newton's laws all prevented it, Fu Yanle would immediately smash his head against the top, fly out of the main building, turn around and spit out an angry fireball, making the entire building pay for its ignorant master's death!

"What?" Yu Jingchen turned his head. "You're going to make a scene with me because of him?"

"Make a scene? You think I wouldn't dare? You underestimate me, don't you? You think I'm afraid of you, don't you? Fine! I really wouldn't dare, but it's not because I'm afraid of you, it's because I'm a handsome guy who respects the elderly and cares for the young!" Fu Yanle gradually lowered his voice, and under Yu Jingchen's cold and oppressive gaze, he straightened his arrogant chin, his aura weak, "Why are you suddenly being so fierce to me?"

"..." Yu Jingchen took a breath and lowered his voice, "Who told you to praise others like that?"

"Can't I praise myself? Is that illegal? I think these adjectives were made for me, is that wrong?" Fu Yanle said, looking aggrieved. "Are you so arrogant?!"

"Praising yourself? You—" Yu Jingchen took an even longer breath than before, "You bought the flowers for yourself?"

"I bought it for the dog!" Fu Yanle threw the flowers into Yu Jingchen's arms, got up and was about to walk out of Tom's lap, but Yu Jingchen pulled her back, and her butt bounced twice on the sofa.

Fu Yanle quickly clutched his dizzy head, ruthlessly slapped away Yu Jingchen's hand, and crossed his arms with a cold snort.

Yu Jingchen pressed one hand on the flower and the other on Fu Yanle, saying, "Is this for me?"

Fu Yanle said arrogantly, "It's a gift for dogs. Whoever takes it is a dog. Otherwise, don't take it."

"Oh." Yu Jingchen turned slightly to the side and rested his chin on Fu Yanle's shoulder.

Fu Yanle shifted uncomfortably. "What?"

Yu Jingchen leaned closer, looked at Fu Yanle's face, which was flushed with anger, and said righteously, "Woof."

"Damn!" Fu Yanle jumped up abruptly, covering his ears and looking incredulously at Yu Jingchen, who had a calm, mature and elegant expression.

What? What did he hear?

"Wipe?" Yu Jingchen barked.

Wipe, wipe, wipe? What heinous crime did he commit to cause such heavy karma to befall innocent ears?

“Brother Chen…” Fu Yanle’s hands slid down his ears, crossed over his mouth, his voice trembling, “Brother, you… it’s not that serious, it really isn’t! It’s just flowers, right? I’ll order 999 for you right away! No, 99,999, and I’ll send them over tomorrow!”

“No need. What I want is not the flowers, but the sentiment of the person who buys them.” Yu Jingchen elegantly crossed his legs. “Just like when I give you flowers, it’s not the flowers I’m giving you, but my sentiment.”

Whenever Yu Jingchen spoke like this, Fu Yanle couldn't stand it. Let alone questioning whether Yu Jingchen had some special, stimulating, unspeakable fetish, he couldn't even utter a sound now.

Yu Jingchen glanced at Fu Yanle and said, "Why did you buy me these kinds of roses?"

"Beautiful, pure, sweet, cute, innocent, noble, elegant," Fu Yanle said soullessly, "It suits you."

Yu Jingchen was silent for about three seconds, then calmly accepted this version of himself and said, "Thank you. What are they called?"

"Peach blossoms and snow-capped mountain roses," Fu Yanle said.

"Thank you." Yu Jingchen leaned closer, his eyelids lowered, and stared quietly at the bouquet. "I like it very much."

Fu Yanle was suddenly stunned. He looked down at Yu Jingchen, who had a gentle expression as he lowered his eyes. The fingertips holding the bouquet were pale with suppressed excitement, as if the roses in his arms were not priceless, rare treasures.

Yu Jingchen seems to really like it.

It was just a bouquet of flowers.

“…I’ll buy it for you often in the future.” Fu Yanle left behind this line, which was full of domineering and doting manner, and without waiting for Yu Jingchen’s reaction, he quickly went upstairs.

He stood on the wall on the second floor for a while, catching his breath, the image of Yu Jingchen's gaze still lingering in his mind.

So pleasing Yu Jingchen is such a simple thing? You don't need to give him a perfect project plan, nor do you need to go to great lengths to find expensive treasures; all you need is a bouquet of flowers.

Fu Yanle couldn't help but chuckle to himself, thinking that those fools who racked their brains to please Yu Jingchen but failed time and time again would never have imagined this. Because this was the secret he had discovered.

Fu Yanle turned around and took two steps forward, trying to sneak a peek at Yu Jingchen, but the next second he retracted his head as if he were a thief and ran away.

Yu Jingchen remained in his original posture, glancing sideways as Fu Yanle's figure disappeared at the end of the stairs. It was quite a while before he heard a door slam shut, louder than usual. He looked away, couldn't help but chuckle, and then took out his phone to send a WeChat message to [Xu Shuo].

Is there any way to make flowers never wither?

Xu Shuo: [Perhaps we could ask the little fairies from the Fairy Castle to come and cast a spell?]

*

"No way, give up. Stop thinking about all this nonsense. Do you really think it's possible? If you have so much free time, you should eat more shit and take care of your stupid and pathetic brain. Stop daydreaming all the time!"

Fu Yanle recorded a voice message in one breath without changing his tone, and typed: 【Get lost! (I'll slap you across the face.jpg)】

The other party replied almost instantly.

"Damn it, I was ruined by your terrible luck! You're the one who made me do a cross-dressing livestream! You have to come with me!"

Fu Yanle was so frightened by An Shigou's loud, Bull Demon King-like voice that he almost died. He immediately replied, "Fuck you? Who fucks you? I'd rather cut off my own penis than fuck you!"

An Shi Gou replied instantly again, this time with the volume amplified by Princess Iron Fan's banana leaf fan, just like the Bull Demon King.

"Damn it! You can't even punctuate properly? I'll pay for you to go to elementary school, okay? Are you trying to drive me crazy? Let me tell you, Fu Yanle, don't even think about driving me crazy. Even if I die, I'll still post on Weibo to curse you before I die! You just wait!"

"What the hell?" Fu Yanle sensed a danger coming from afar, immediately exited WeChat, entered Weibo, found An Shigou's Weibo homepage, and refreshed it several times. Sure enough, a new Weibo post appeared.

[I'm not a scoundrel: If Fu Yanle doesn't agree to do a live stream with me, I'll hang myself in front of his door! (Screenshot.jpg)]

“This heartless beast!” Fu Yanle slid down.

[This screen full of long audio recordings must contain a lot of traditional Chinese culture. (Heart emoji)]

Poor little Gou, don't be naive. Fu Gou's heart is harder than the five-colored stones Nuwa used to mend the sky! Even if you hang yourself, even if you cut yourself into pieces and pasted them into his bedroom from every angle, he wouldn't soften his heart. (Heart emoji)

[I'm not doing this for myself, really, I'm really doing this to help Xiao Gou Gou! I'm willing to join the hanging squad! (heart emoji)]

+1

...

+10086

"What a masterful scheme of shifting blame, using someone else to do the dirty work, creating a false impression through repeated rumors, and employing a relentless moral blackmail tactic!" Fu Yanle rubbed his nose and replied ruthlessly: [Beg me, be sincere. You only have one chance.]

The moment Fu Yanle gave An Shigou a "follow" button, and after refreshing the page twice, An Shigou offered the greatest sincerity of his life.

[I'm not dirty: (kowtows.jpg)]

In the high-definition photo, An Shigou is kneeling in the center of the bed, his forehead reverently touching the sheets, holding a phone in his hands with the words "You are my father" written on it.

From this angle, you can also see his pert and firm buttocks.

"Pfft!"

Fu Yanle replied: [Okay, sweetie, I'll spoil you this time. Let's chat privately and discuss it. (Little panda touching its belly.jpg)]

Author's Note:

Today's achievement in Da Yu: [Xiao Fu's Peach Blossom Snow Mountain Rose *1]

These roses are really beautiful, well, all roses are beautiful.