Chapter 92 We Are Different

A sudden and intense pain like a fine electric current instantly ran through Ren Limeng's whole body from her left cheek, but it was nothing compared to the heartache and confusion she felt at that moment.

The costume in her hand was unconsciously crumpled tightly by Ren Limeng's already white fingers. The delicate and beautiful satin surface was twisted and folded between her fingers. Every wrinkle that seemed to be riddled with holes carried an unspeakable sorrow.

It hurts so much.

Even the most painful leg stretching and stretching as a child were not half as painful as it is now. Even the stagnation in her practice that she once feared the most has become less important. Even every breath she takes now seems so heavy that it can overwhelm her immediately.

"I give up."

I don’t know how long it took, but Ren Limeng finally found her voice and woke up from a dream.

She lowered her head and muttered to herself. She didn't look at the emotional Wu Murong in front of her, nor did she think about the silent Li Chuyue behind her. She just stared quietly at the dirty wooden floor under her feet, her eyes hiding an unfocused emptiness.

She lost, she was completely defeated in this challenge.

The heavy snow fell silently between the sky and the earth, layer upon layer, densely packed, bringing with it a biting chill that penetrated the heart.

There was only one candidate left in the selection for the lead actor of "Peach Blossom Fan", and he won without a fight. The whole selection seemed like a farce.

Wu Murong felt so much disappointment and anger in her heart, but she still tried to suppress all her emotions, and settled the matter for her good-for-nothing daughter, and paid countless smiles. She hated Ren Limeng's wooden face, but no matter how hard she tried to persuade her, Ren Limeng just had a stubborn face and didn't say a word except "I'm sorry".

Ren Limeng and Li Chuyue met again in the training room that evening.

Throughout the day, Ren Limeng silently and numbly endured the confusion and sighs of everyone around her, and bowed and apologized countless times. Her mother was finally persuaded to leave by Teacher Qi and her father who came over, or it could be said that her mother was unilaterally and forcibly taken away by her father. Everyone tried to give the mother and daughter some time to breathe and calm down to prevent the situation from escalating.

Only one thought kept supporting Ren Limeng. After all the panic, she finally had time to come to the training room and calmly and persistently asked the "why" that was bothering her heart.

As she expected, Li Chuyue was here, curled up in a corner of the room, hugging her legs tightly with her arms. After hearing the sound of someone entering the room, she looked at her quietly.

In the dark training room, there was only the afterglow of the setting sun, shining coldly on the snowy ground and indifferently on the two people's dim and indistinguishable faces.

Ren Limeng slowly closed the door, but did not take another step forward. She stood straight behind the door, looking at Li Chuyue who was curled up in front of her.

"Why?"

Her face was filled with unconcealable fatigue and inexplicable disappointment. Ren Limeng's eyelashes trembled slightly, but her voice was terrifyingly calm. She had calmed her anger and did not blame anyone, as if there was no ups and downs at all.

"Why? Mengmeng, don't you know?"

Li Chuyue spoke softly. She stared at herself in the mirror of the training room. In the dim light, only a vague and hypocritical outline could be seen. She did not even look at Ren Limeng.

"A possible recommendation spot? That's all you want? Li Chuyue, if that's the reason, it's so ironic! It's just a recommendation. The two of us can definitely get into the drama school with our own abilities! Besides, I've already said I don't care about this matter. If you want it, just take it! It was you who said we wanted a fair competition, and you..."

Just tell me, no matter what you want, I have thousands of ways to solve this problem perfectly! Why come to this!

She wouldn't accept it! She couldn't accept it! Thinking carefully, twelve years of growing up together, experiencing all the joys and sorrows together, from innocent children to young women, countless moments of companionship and true love, couldn't compare to a possible admission?

This is so ironic!

Ren Limeng took a deep breath to hide the mockery on her lips, but the complex emotions in her heart were wandering uncontrollably. She could only clench her hands tightly to make herself look calmer and cover up all the hurt and sadness in the darkness.

Only in front of her good friends would she expose her vulnerability, and now, she just wanted to question Li Chuyue.

"Take it? How do I take it? It's fair, Mengmeng, we are different."

Li Chuyue's voice was filled with melancholy. When she mentioned "fairness", she snorted coldly with self-mockery.

"It's never been the same. To you, this is just an insignificant thing, but I...can't afford to lose."

Li Chuyue couldn't admit that from the moment she drew the first black mark, the regret in her heart had been surging like a flood, just like why she was so nervous and trembling in front of Wu Murong that she couldn't help but lie.

It's not because there is no background or surveillance, nor is it because she is possessed by ghosts. Her unexpected actions again and again may be the real her, the inner self she dare not face.

She looked at herself in the mirror tremblingly, looking at the familiar face as if she was seeing herself for the first time.

"Can't afford to lose? If you can't afford to lose, then win with dignity!"

Ren Limeng's powerful voice finally reached Li Chuyue's ears. She looked up suddenly, her shouts echoing in the training room, mixed with anger and despair. "Honestly? How can we win? Am I not working hard enough? Ren Limeng, am I not working as hard as you?"

She faced Ren Limeng in front of her, and didn't just ask Ren Limeng questions. Her extremely confused crying voice revealed unspeakable exhaustion, "I can't do it! I've tried my best! I can't do it! But I can't fail!"

Tears streamed down her cheeks like rain, and Li Chuyue wanted to shrink herself completely into the darkness, as if this would allow her to escape from all reality.

"That's not an excuse. We learned to be humane on the first day of our acting training! This is basic artistic ethics! Li Chuyue, when did you become like this? Do you... think you did the right thing? If I hadn't kept it a secret for you, have you ever thought about what would have happened to you? You ruined my costume... and you don't even feel a little sorry?"

Ren Limeng raised her head and forced back the tears that kept welling up in her eyes. She pretended to be cold and stared at the figure in the dimness. Her voice was full of disappointment, even colder than the temperature outside.

"I'm so sorry!"

After a long silence, Li Chuyue closed her eyes and then opened them resolutely. She wiped away all the tears from the corners of her eyes, slowly stood up and straightened her back.

She no longer looked at herself in the mirror, she could only accept what was happening before her. No one could save her from this predicament except herself.

Ren Limeng's accusations were so natural, so harsh, and so ridiculous! What did she know? She only knew how to accuse her!

Li Chuyue finally met Ren Limeng's complicated eyes indifferently. Through the dim light, she spoke coldly while slowly walking towards Ren Limeng.

"I'm sorry I don't have your family background! I'm sorry I don't have your talent! I'm sorry I don't have your ignorance and fearlessness! Ren Limeng, you seem so great, able to stand on the moral high ground and accuse me, but without your parents, what are you? As someone who won at the starting line, do you understand what it means to be upright?"

"Li Chuyue!"

Ren Limeng never thought that her best friend had always thought of her like this, and her true feelings turned out to be like this.

"Isn't it? You don't think that the teachers' preference for you since you were a child is because you are Ren Limeng? They only favor Wu Murong's daughter! From childhood to adulthood, so many times, I can do the moves just as well as you, why don't they praise me? What did I do wrong? Why do you take up an entire team's quota in the challenge? You are so high-handed and give me alms, do you think I should be grateful? The championship was obviously won by our joint efforts, why do people say that you led me? You know what you have done yourself!"

Li Chuyue became more and more excited as she spoke. Many things that she thought she didn't care about turned out to be so vivid in her mind, taking root and spreading in her heart.

"You...every word you say makes me feel sick. You're so sanctimonious! So hypocritical! Do you even know what opera is? To be honest, do you love singing opera? You're just a poor bastard forced into it by your mother! Do you still remember when you were a kid, crying and begging not to sing opera? Now that everyone is praising you, you think you're so great. How ridiculous! Without your parents, what do you think you are?..."

Li Chuyue knew that her words were becoming more and more vicious and insincere, blurring out many confusing past events. They knew each other too well and knew how to poke at each other's pain points. However, it seemed that only in this way could she appear less vicious and conceal all her panic and helplessness at the moment.

Yes, Ren Limeng relied on her parents. Even with such a serious accident today, her mother easily helped her calm down! If her mother had helped, would Ren Limeng have the leisure to stand here now? Ren Limeng had directly abdicated in front of the judges at the Meixiang Theater. Without her mother's protection, how could she have dared to do that?

Ren Limeng just listened quietly to Li Chuyue's increasingly loud and broken accusations. The accusations with tears in her voice gradually turned into unbearable abuse, as if she was venting all her dissatisfaction and unwillingness over the years. Ren Limeng had never discovered that Li Chuyue had so many things hidden in her heart.

Like a hard stone, Ren Limeng stood there silently, clenching her hands and looking expressionlessly at Li Chuyue who was just a few feet away. She could feel every heavy and excited breath of hers, but she did not interrupt her.

Because she knew it was useless and she had already lost this good friend.

From the moment Li Chuyue drew the first stroke, from the moment Li Chuyue uttered the first word in front of her mother, Ren Limeng apologized to the teachers at the drama school and theater in a daze that day, but she was thinking clearly about the whole thing.

The implication of Li Chuyue's words was expected. No matter how unwilling she was to believe it, it was of no use, and there was no need for her to deceive herself anymore.

Complex and heavy emotions surged through her internal organs like a tide, destroying Ren Limeng's last fantasy. She finally accepted that her questioning at this moment was meaningless, like a drop of water in the desert, which would not leave any trace in Li Chuyue's heart.

But she couldn't be defeated like this. Ren Limeng straightened her back, put on a calm smile, and slowly spoke to the somewhat hysterical Li Chuyue.