Chapter 62

Basil tried hard not to appear flustered: "It's okay, Ranran, gender has never been a problem. My liking you has nothing to do with whether you are an Alpha or an Omega, right? So what if you're an Enigma? If Shen Shiqian can accept it, so can I."

Feng Ran: "Aren't you afraid? I'm no different from other paranoid and insane Enigmas in historical legends. I even almost killed Shen Shiqian."

“I will modify your body, reshape your mental cognition, and deprive you of your freedom to live. Even if these are not my original intentions, the control of pheromones is just that powerful. Just like how Shen Shiqian has become inseparable from me, that may not have been his original intention either, but now he can only crave me.”

Can you really accept me as I am?

"Or should I accept a completely different version of myself?"

She took Basil's hand, as if to verify something, and held his fingers to touch her own marked teeth. Enigma's natural pressure made Basil tremble instinctively, so Feng Ran didn't want to verify anymore and let go of his hand.

She gave a bitter smile, trying to comfort herself: "But I can't. I'm so scared. I'm scared that you'll become like that. Can that really be considered happiness? Enigma can mark any gender because they have an abnormally high compatibility with anyone. Due to genetic selection, everyone will like them. But if everyone looks the same, what standard am I supposed to use to judge a relationship?"

Basil's face turned pale, and he looked extremely sad. He remained silent for a while before continuing, "Then why can you accept Shen Shiqian becoming like that?"

Feng Ran: "Because I hate him, I don't care what he becomes, but you are different."

"I don't want to hate you."

Basil was even more upset: "But you don't seem to hate him at all." His eyes were red, as if he was about to cry. "Feng Ran, can I still trust you?"

Feng Ran: "I don't know either, there are many things that are hard to explain." She hugged Basil and nestled gently in his arms.

Basil was completely baffled. His emotions seemed to explode, and he bit Feng Ran's neck fiercely. Feng Ran was in so much pain that he couldn't breathe, but he still endured it and released pheromones to cooperate with him.

It felt like I was back in the Sleica family villa, a painful ambiguity, one side burning with passion, the other icy cold. We never really communicated properly, yet this love lingered for a very long time.

They don't know why things have turned out this way.

/

Daily life was falling apart, and Luo Le decided to put the relationship on hold. He couldn't figure out Feng Ran's feelings for him, and he was afraid of the hatred she spoke of. He even felt ashamed of that instinctive fear, but he still didn't want to give up. He wanted to compete with Shen Shiqian fairly and squarely. Although Shen Shiqian might not have the same idea, he would not be afraid. Even though the road ahead was rugged and difficult and he didn't know where it would lead, he felt bitter and complicated.

Feng Ran, however, was not as inspiring as him. With a burning tooth mark on his face, he slunk home. When Zuo Ling saw her outside the school gate, he was terrified. Several times he tried to say something but was silenced by Feng Ran's venting gaze.

Wait, what's going on? Why is their marshal being cuckolded?

The conversation with Basil took quite a while. When he got home, Shen Shiqian had already left work. He stared at Feng Ran in astonishment at the bite marks on her neck. The Alpha's pheromones were dull and bitter, like strong Chinese herbal medicine. What had happened at school was self-evident.

Shen Shiqian looked at her with concern: "Ranran, are you alright?"

Feng Ran didn't really want things to turn out like this with Luo Le, but she also knew she couldn't keep it a secret forever. She couldn't understand what Luo Le was thinking anymore, but looking at Shen Shiqian, she felt a little wronged.

"Shen Shiqian, are you afraid of me?"

Shen Shiqian gently hugged her, took the gauze from Xiao Lan's hand, and followed Xisen's example to apply it to her face with tape. He tried his best to keep his expression calm: "Don't you know me? If I have to have any weakness, it's that I'm afraid of losing you."

Feng Ran chuckled: "How ironic."

She could no longer tell whose love was real, or perhaps even her own feelings weren't real.

Shen Shiqian touched her as gently as possible, his love tender and lingering. "Ranran, can you tell me what your relationship with Basil really is?"

Feng Ran thought for a moment and asked him in return, "How do you view my relationship with him in our past life? In the eyes of you mortals, did we appear to be a loving and happy couple?"

Shen Shiqian shook his head honestly. People's eyes are always critical and harsh. Feng Ran and Luo Le got engaged and lived together when they were 17. Anyone with eyes could see that something was wrong. Later, Feng Ran became a wanted criminal who caused trouble in the area, and people's malice towards her intensified. If Luo Le hadn't died early, she would have been dragged out and criticized by the angry crowd. In other people's eyes, their marriage had nothing to do with happiness. Even after Feng Ran was exonerated after the explosion, it only made people feel more sorry for her past experiences.

Feng Ran: "Really? Then maybe they're right."

"Basil and I are accomplices."

Two people bound together by a twisted emotional relationship, heading in opposite directions.

"He killed Feng Xiqiao and exposed the problems with the Feng family's accounts. Although half of those accounts were fabricated, Feng Xiqiao was already dead and there was no way to argue against it. Feng Linye couldn't handle the situation, so the Feng family went bankrupt just like that."

"It would have been easy for him to bring down the Sleica family, since he had already taken over half of the Sleica family's businesses at that time, and he had personally sabotaged most of the investment projects, just to detonate them at the last moment."

"The whole city was in an uproar, and it burned away all the past that had trapped me. He loved me very much, don't you think?"

Although Shen Shiqian was shocked, his words were still incisive: "Do you feel happy? He may love you to the point of madness, but didn't he make too many choices for you without your consent, which led you to a dead end in the end?"

"At that time, you had no choice. You thought he was great, and you embellished that memory to avoid making yourself seem more miserable. But you've already gone through his choice, so shouldn't you be very clear about the truth in your heart?"

"Even if you could start over now, and the tragedy of the past has taken countless turns, the only one who can be changed is you. He still scares you, doesn't he? Although I don't know how you two got along before, if you know he will cause you pain and still choose to get close to him, then your relationship is indeed unhealthy."

Feng Ran... Feng Ran couldn't speak. On one hand, she felt that the facts Shen Shiqian said were terrifying, and on the other hand, she rationally believed that he was right. But something like her preconceived notions had been broken, leaving her unable to react for a long time.

Isn't a distorted, unhealthy attachment also love?

It seems that it wasn't true. When she was at Sleica's house, Feng Ran was in pain every day, watching Luo Le grow more and more haggard. She knew that things couldn't go on like this and hoped that Luo Le would stop caring about her. But she never explicitly expressed these feelings because she was afraid of what would happen if Luo Le really let go of her and didn't want her anymore. Luo Le's morbid and awkward desire to control became her painkiller for her anxiety. Even if the two of them were to head towards destruction, Feng Ran didn't care.

It wasn't until Basil woke up before her, and until her attachment was completely severed, that Feng Ran realized in a daze that separation wasn't as terrible as she had imagined. Rather, the anxiety she had felt all the time finally crashed to the ground and was smashed to pieces.

But if that's the case, what about her feelings for basil? Is it just nostalgia for the past? Is it simply an attempt to return to the past in this second life because she can't bear to let go? Wouldn't that just lead to repeating the same mistakes?

Feng Ran was on the verge of collapse, his face even more desperate than when facing Basil's questioning. The painful, incriminating bite mark left by Basil no longer hurt; the pain had instead seeped into his heart more intensely, like poison.

Shen Shiqian gently wiped away her tears and kissed the corners of her eyes, between her brows, and on her earlobes.

The warm, moist air teased her, creating an itch that seemed to be slowly healing her aching, numb heart. Feng Ran stared blankly at Shen Shiqian, her tender love seemingly about to drown her.

He took Feng Ran's hand, grasped one end of the tie, and gently tugged, causing the tie to unravel and fall apart.

Feng Ran held the tie in his hand and heard Shen Shiqian say:

"Ranran, he left you with too few choices, but I am different. I will give you all the right to choose, and I will prove to everyone that I can give you happiness."

His deep blue eyes reflected Feng Ran's face, sparkling like the only North Star in the night sky.

Should he be trusted? Feng Ran didn't know.

But Shen Shiqian was proactive and obedient, flatteringly revealing his neck to press close to her. He boldly told Feng Ran that he loved everything about her, even himself, who had been modified by the Enigma mark, and he could accept it gladly. The tie in his hand felt like a tether, or perhaps his very life.

Her heart started beating again in that minute, the force of the pounding shocking Feng Ran. It echoed incessantly like a serenade in an empty valley. She realized that she had always felt so empty and lonely.

Feng Ran looked at the gland that Shen Shiqian had turned his head to present to him, and for the first time felt at a loss.

She held the tie with both hands reverently, almost sinking into Shen Shiqian's arms. Shen Shiqian's pheromones seemed to have changed, no longer smelling like a rich, bitter finished chocolate, but like fresh, slightly sour and fruity cocoa beans.

In that enchanting embrace, someone's heartbeat was not as calm as their expression; each beat was like fireworks exploding in the wind's ear.

She wrapped the tie around Shen Shiqian's neck, made a loop, grabbed one end, pulled Shen Shiqian to the side, very close, controlled him with one hand, and pressed his chin with the other, kissing him.

It's unclear who was suffocating in that kiss.

It was only because of Shen Shiqian's indulgence that Feng Ran finally broke free from that fearful suspicion and distrust. Just like when Basil cut off his connection with the world, he gained an understanding of freedom because of betrayal, and the pain brought by guilt and longing was filled and replaced by Shen Shiqian's ardent love.

It's like another kind of liberation, another kind of rebirth.