Hidden thoughts

Hidden thoughts

I looked at the hands that were reaching out to me, and fearing that my hesitation would arouse his suspicion, I quickly touched his palm lightly with my fingertips.

Jiang Mingzhuo doesn't seem to have any interest in me at all.

His eyes quickly shifted away, his full attention focused on the children who suffered from aphasia or were not very talkative.

He half-squatted down, chatting with the group of children. Jiang Mingzhuo possessed a completely different temperament from men his age—gentle and noble, yet with a touch of aloofness. Just from his upright posture and the composed elegance of his every move, one could tell that he came from a good family and had excellent upbringing.

The man's profile was exquisitely handsome, with beautiful bone structure, but besides being clean, it seemed to carry a hint of evil. The children might not notice it; they would simply think that this older brother was very gentle and patient.

My fingers trembled involuntarily.

Today, there were several unfamiliar faces among the children, and Xu Ya, who always arrived on time, was not there. I felt inexplicably nervous. Bodyguards protecting Jiang Mingzhuo stood on both sides of the door, their eyes fixed intently on their master.

"Why are you crying?" Jiang Mingzhuo stroked a little girl's cheek. "Is there anything your older brother can do to help you?"

An elegant and soothing voice rang out from not far away. It was Jiang Mingzhuo's uniquely calm and composed tone.

He can be described as "perfect" from head to toe, and his voice is so captivating that it tickles the ears.

"My doll is gone." The little girl cried as Jiang Mingzhuo held her hand. I hadn't seen her before. Maybe it was because she was new to this place and her parents weren't around. She was scared and burrowed into Jiang Mingzhuo's arms.

"What does she look like?" Jiang Mingzhuo asked her patiently.

The girl spoke very slowly, "It's like this... it's a bear..." She gestured, but her words were incoherent. Other children also gathered around. Jiang Mingzhuo used to hate these kinds of occasions the most, as he disliked children who cried and made a fuss. But now he seemed like a completely different person.

Jiang Mingzhuo frowned slightly.

I've been with him for five years, and I can guess how he wants to solve problems.

Just buy the exact same one for the little girl. Jiang Mingzhuo and Jiang Zhao always solve problems directly. They believe that money can solve 90% of the world's problems, and if there are still problems, it's because they don't have enough money.

I turned slightly to the side, looked at the tall bodyguard beside me, and stammered for a moment, "I...I need to go find the doctor."

The other person was wearing sunglasses, so I couldn't tell their emotions at all. They looked at Jiang Mingzhuo, who was chatting with the children. Noticing his subordinate's gaze, he waved his hand, and only then did the other person allow me to leave.

I walked sluggishly into the doctor's office. She prescribed me new medication and asked me a few simple questions.

The doctor was delighted: "Xiao Fu, you're recovering well. I think in a few months you'll be just like a normal person."

"I..." I was so anxious that I couldn't speak. I could only use sign language to ask the doctor, "Why didn't Xu Ya come today? Jiang Mingzhuo... no, Mr. Jiang, isn't he very busy? How come he has time to volunteer, and there are several children I haven't seen before?"

The doctor smiled. "YK Communications has always been one of our hospital's sponsors. This time, Mr. Jiang gave us a lot of money, which is very supportive of our work in treating children with aphasia. As for those children, they are the children of YK employees. They are all children who have been neglected by their parents. Mr. Jiang brought them all here; he is very kind."

Jiang Mingzhuo did everything so frankly and thoughtfully that no one could find a single fault with him.

Then the doctor looked at me, his eyes teasing yet warm, "Xu Ya, I heard he has one last exam today and can't come. Does Xiao Fu prefer spending time with him to Mr. Jiang?"

"Hmm..." I murmured, but a hint of embarrassment appeared in the eyes of the doctor sitting opposite me.

I turned my head and saw Jiang Mingzhuo appear at the door at some point. His pupils were dark, and he had a faint smile on his lips. His eyes were devoid of warmth, and coupled with his powerful aura, neither the doctor nor I knew how much of our conversation he had overheard.

Jiang Mingzhuo's voice sounded normal. "I had someone send some toys to the child. Is that alright?"

The doctor quickly stood up. She saw Jiang Mingzhuo's expression, which was one of trepidation and even natural fear.

Jiang Mingzhuo's power and the huge class difference between them made it impossible for her to look him in the eye as an equal. She lowered her eyes and said, "Mr. Jiang, of course you can. Children love to play these games."

"That's good." Jiang Mingzhuo chuckled.

The doctor's tension did not subside; she seemed to feel even more that she had offended Jiang Mingzhuo, and her face turned slightly pale.

Jiang Mingzhuo still didn't look at me, turned around and left. The doctor kept trembling until Jiang Mingzhuo's figure completely disappeared. I quickly supported her, hoping she would calm down.

I understand why she's so afraid of Jiang Mingzhuo. Although Mr. Jiang and Mrs. Jiang have a falling out and divorced, the two brothers have a very good relationship. They are evenly matched, and their combined businesses have an overwhelming influence over the entire Empire State.

Nobody wanted to offend the Jiang family heir at this time. Looking at the doctor's expression, I couldn't bear it. I comforted her with sign language, "You're overthinking it. Mr. Jiang isn't that kind of person. Besides, he's so kind to children, how could he be so petty with you?"

She looked a little better, so I poured her a glass of lemon honey water before leaving the office.

Jiang Mingzhuo was in the corridor.

He held a slowly burning cigarette between his right fingers, but didn't take many puffs, just letting the smoke rise.

The corridor was quiet, and he quickly noticed me. Jiang Mingzhuo turned around, looked at me for two seconds, and then put out his cigarette.

“Alright, I won’t do anything to her,” he said to me. His long, slender arms stretched out far, showcasing his superior proportions. “Come here.”

I instinctively walked to his side; it was a physical reaction that I couldn't resist.

Jiang Mingzhuo looked down at me, his voice low: "You can talk now."

I took a step back timidly, but then felt that the action would only make things more obvious. I suppressed the urge to move away from him, nodded, and my long eyelashes trembled uncontrollably. "Um... I've been... doing... rehabilitation training."

Jiang Mingzhuo's cold, dark eyes were fixed on me.

I just wanted to pretend that I was speaking to a high-achieving man like him for the first time, and that I was at a loss for words. I made myself look like a shy girl, suppressing my racing heart, and said in a very soft voice, "Mr. Jiang, aren't you going in?"

My fingers were trembling slightly, my heart was pounding, and my mind was blank. It was too difficult to resist my instinct to beg for mercy.

Jiang Mingzhuo's lips curled up almost imperceptibly.

"There's so much water." He raised his hand, his fingertips gently gliding across my face, each touch sending a sharp, chilling shiver down my spine.

The sticky water on his fingertips made me realize that I was crying.

I was actually scared to tears by Jiang Mingzhuo... I was a little dazed. Jiang Mingzhuo took out a clean handkerchief and patiently wiped away my tears. His fan-shaped eyes were slightly raised, and his gaze was not arrogant or cold, but rather quite gentle.

After doing all this, he put the handkerchief back into his coat pocket. So dirty… I think it was covered in my tears, smeared by my wet eyelashes.

How could Jiang Mingzhuo take it back so casually?

"You're afraid of me, aren't you?" Jiang Mingzhuo said casually, as if he were talking about the weather.

I quickly shook my head and said, "I... hate the smell of smoke. It makes my eyes water and makes me feel uncomfortable."

This isn't exactly a lie. After leaving the Jiang family, I worked at a convenience store near a gas station for a while. Although Jiang Mingzhuo and Jiang Zhao also smoked, they rarely did it in front of me, and the tobacco only tasted bitter, not unpleasant.

The cigarettes emanating from the men in the convenience store were pungent and unpleasant. Even though the owner, fearing I would be harassed by the men, specifically assigned me to work as a porter in the store, I still developed a problem from the smell. The strong smell of cigarettes always made my eyes water.

Jiang Mingzhuo gave a soft "Oh," and asked, "Why didn't you tell me?"

"..." I didn't dare look at him, my eyes darting away.

He smiled and said, "The gifts I bought for them have arrived. You can go in and take a look."

I nodded, and Jiang Mingzhuo took out a piece of candy from his pocket and handed it to me, saying, "Eat something sweet first, and you won't feel so bad."

"Hmm..." I wanted to refuse, but Jiang Mingzhuo had already unwrapped the candy and fed the berry milk flavored candy to my mouth. I could only open my mouth to receive the candy, but I didn't notice that Jiang Mingzhuo was staring at my lips, his eyes growing deeper and deeper.

The candy was forcefully pushed in, and instantly the aroma of berries and the rich taste of milk melted in my mouth. My tongue gently pressed against it; I was already eating it, so I couldn't very well spit it out. But my gaze involuntarily focused on Jiang Mingzhuo's fingers, which were gently caressing me in a somewhat ambiguous way.

I felt my heart was pounding so hard it was about to jump out of my body.

"Alright," Jiang Mingzhuo said, "If you've recovered, come inside with me. All the children are looking for you."

I was stared at by him without blinking, and I couldn't bring myself to say anything to refuse, so I could only nod silently.

When I pushed open the door to the rehabilitation classroom again, I saw that the children were all holding huge and exquisite dolls in their arms: rabbits, brown bears, polar bears, squirrels... The classroom was almost filled with all kinds of things that children like to play with. When Jiang Mingzhuo came in again, the children looked at him with admiration.

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They gathered around, and Jiang Mingzhuo smiled at them, asking, "Do you like it?"

"Brother, you're so kind."

“I love this bear so much! I’ve wanted this bear for Christmas, but my mom said I already have a little bear sister and can’t buy me a bear brother. Thank you, Mr. Jiang, for giving it to me.”

"You are so kind to us."

Children are easily distrustful of adults when they receive a gift. Besides, Jiang Mingzhuo was dressed in an expensive-looking suit and had a handsome face that made the children trust him completely.

I was standing to the side when the little girl, who always liked to chat with me, grabbed my hand and pulled me aside.

She was incredibly mysterious, suddenly pulling out a rabbit doll from behind her back. "Sister Xiaofu, are you sad because you didn't get one? I secretly saved one for you."

The little bunny doll is so cute, so soft, and it even seems to smell nice.

She acted like an adult, watching me stare blankly at the doll, and patted my shoulder reassuringly, "Don't cry, Sister Xiaofu."

Seeing all the other children surrounding Jiang Mingzhuo, while she remained by my side, I felt a faint sense of unreality. The little girl gestured for me to look down, then quietly tiptoed and whispered in my ear, "They all like Mr. Jiang, but I don't. I'm a little afraid of him... just like you are."

My eyelashes trembled nervously. I thought I was hiding it well, but I didn't expect that even a child could see through my nervousness and unease.

"I...I'm not afraid." I hugged her tightly, trying to cover up my misunderstanding, and whispered an explanation to her.

“You’re so scared you’re like a frozen doll.” She frowned slightly at me. “You habitually bite your lip whenever you see him. Like this.”

She mimicked my mannerisms, gently biting her lip, looking delicate, innocent, and even a little pitiful and wronged.

"What are you talking about?" Jiang Mingzhuo suddenly appeared. The little girl also looked up, then immediately buried her face in my chest and stopped talking.

“No…” I hugged the girl tightly and said to her, “She only had one doll, but when she saw that I didn’t have one, she gave me hers.”

The little girl looked up, blinking her round, dark eyes. She was very well-behaved. "I can play with other people, but it would be so pitiful for Sister Xiaofu if she didn't have any dolls."

"Really? You want one too, Xiao Fu?" Jiang Mingzhuo looked at me, smiled lightly, and even patted the girl's head in a good mood.

I instinctively wanted to bite my lip, but then I remembered the girl's reminder, hugged her, and said to Jiang Mingzhuo, "Did I?"

“Of course,” Jiang Mingzhuo said, his smile still lingering. “However, you’ll have to help your little sister Fu pick something out. Because your brother forgot to buy her one, and doesn’t know what she likes. Would you be willing?”

The little girl looked up at me, and Jiang Mingzhuo gently rubbed her fair face. Her big, dark, bright eyes blinked softly.

"Okay then." Her voice was soft and incredibly cute.

“Your candy…” I gestured for Jiang Mingzhuo to give her one.

“Just that one,” he said. Jiang Mingzhuo picked the little girl up from my arms with one arm, took her little schoolbag, and looked at me: “Let’s go, let’s pick out a doll you like.”

The little girl stared straight at him with her dark pupils. "But I still have to wait for my mom and dad to come home."

"Don't worry, I'll take you home. I won't lose you." Jiang Mingzhuo's thin lips curved into a slight smile.

He left his assistant, who had been waiting at the door, to wait for the other children's parents to pick them up. As for the little girl who always relied on me, he carried her into the Maybach that was waiting at the door.

The car was understated, but the interior was exceptionally luxurious, with beige leather seats and elegant mahogany trim—everything fascinated the little girl. When we arrived at a nearby store, she took my hand and led me through the enormous toy store. Half-length dolls, all sorts of limited-edition Lego sets… she would touch one thing after another, then curiously ask me to take the shark doll down for her.

Jiang Mingzhuo lived not far from us. I noticed that he would almost always ask someone to pay for the things that the little girl had touched.

The girl pulled me behind the shelf and bought me the largest lop-eared rabbit plush toy, a light pink with blue gemstone eyes. She put the rabbit in my arms and told me mysteriously, "Sister Xiaofu, I just looked around, and this one is the cutest. It costs 70,000 yuan."

"...But, I..."

"Take it, he's not short of money."

Jiang Mingzhuo, who was behind him, heard this and couldn't help but smile. "Don't worry, I can afford it."

My face flushed red instantly.

Jiang Mingzhuo bought all the dolls and Lego sets the little girl liked and instructed the driver to put them in the trunk. The little girl had been playing all day and was tired. She wrapped her arms around my neck, her movements very dependent, her whole body soft, her warm breath spraying on my neck, and she fell asleep.

I held her in my arms as we sat in the car. I don't know if it was because of the girl, but I slowly started to feel sleepy, especially since the scenery outside the car window remained the same. My eyelashes drooped weakly, but I forced myself to stay awake and held the girl.

The car quickly arrived at a middle-class neighborhood in the suburbs, outside a beautiful white house. The girl's young parents came out of the house, took their sleeping daughter from my arms, and Jiang Mingzhuo instructed the driver to give them all the things.

The parents were clearly taken aback by Jiang Mingzhuo's extravagance.

I was extremely sleepy. I vaguely saw Jiang Mingzhuo's tall and slender figure. He politely said goodbye to the girl's parents and returned to the car. In addition to the cold air, there was also the crisp scent of pine wood after the snow on Jiang Mingzhuo's body.

"Her parents didn't say anything, did they?" I asked him, trying to suppress my weariness.

“…No.” Jiang Mingzhuo smiled at me.

He also possessed a certain gentleness; his features were indeed quite deceptive, making me pause for a moment. Although Jiang Mingzhuo came from a wealthy family, he seemed to possess an innate, seemingly patient and gentle, yet actually unapproachable, aura of approachability. He appeared easy to talk to, but was not easy to get along with.

My mind was completely sluggish, and Jiang Mingzhuo in front of me seemed to be getting blurry. I raised my hand to my forehead, and my eyes were getting hotter and hotter until my body began to lean forward uncontrollably and crashed into the solid male chest in front of me.

"If only we could have a daughter, Xiao Fu."

All I could hear was the scalding, burning breath covering my ears.

"Give me one too, okay?" Jiang Mingzhuo's voice was low and gentle. In the dark and quiet back seat, the partition was raised, and no one noticed what he was going to do in this enclosed space. All my senses were amplified infinitely, but due to drowsiness, I was immediately drawn into the deepest darkness.

This dream felt more unfamiliar to me than any I've had before.

I saw a completely unfamiliar, classically luxurious villa, and I also saw Jiang Mingzhuo. He was even more unfamiliar than I remembered; he looked more mature and handsome, but also increasingly gloomy and thin. I could hardly believe that the extremely decadent man was him.

His eyes, however, held an uncontrollable pain as he tightly gripped the pale, limp finger that stretched out from beside the bed.

“Xiao Fu…” he called my name, “Don’t leave me, don’t abandon me, please.”

Jiang Mingzhuo pleaded humbly, and only then did I realize that the woman lying there, unable to speak, was me. I couldn't see my own face clearly, but I knew this was the end for Jiang Mingzhuo and me. From the first time we met, he fell in love with me at first sight and began to control me in every way.

I have no hobbies, no dreams, and not even friends.

Jiang Zhao never existed in my world. Long before he returned to China, Jiang Mingzhuo had already sent me to study in a place tens of thousands of kilometers away from the Empire State. Later, Jiang Mingzhuo and I held a wedding ceremony in a local church, but from the age of sixteen to twenty-six, my life had been completely controlled by him and was utterly outside the realm of normal people.

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I was depressed and unhappy. In less than five years of marriage, I attempted suicide several times due to depression.

Jiang Mingzhuo had someone watch over me, but I still found an opportunity and jumped from the windowsill. At my funeral, Jiang Mingzhuo also committed suicide.

Then, we met again through the "game's" arrangement. The "game" controlled Jiang Mingzhuo, yet couldn't completely control him; he gradually developed "self-awareness." He left me at the Jiang family villa, watching as Jiang Zhao and I met by the pool.

As he predicted, Jiang Zhao also fell in love with me. But Jiang Zhao couldn't accept Jiang Mingzhuo as his rival, so he kicked Jiang Mingzhuo out. I still had no choice; the only difference was that the man beside me changed from Jiang Mingzhuo to his brother, Jiang Zhao.

This time, I lived a little longer. I even had a child with Jiang Zhao, but I hated Jiang Zhao, so I forcibly aborted the child before it was born. Jiang Zhao was furious and locked me in the house, and we had another child together.

I almost broke down; this time, I nearly killed Jiang Zhao.

While he was kissing me, I smashed a vase over his head. Jiang Zhao looked strong and cold, but he had a severe blood clotting disorder. Just from the blow, blood started flowing down his head. The bright red blood stained his eyes, his jaw, and his neck... The bleeding wouldn't stop.

During his coma, Jiang Mingzhuo returned and took control of his brother's vast and terrifying business empire. I was like a trophy, passing from Jiang Zhaoshen to Jiang Mingzhuo, and I soon passed away.

The third time, Jiang Mingzhuo arranged for Jiang Zhao to marry another woman. But he met me abroad, and after his divorce, he pursued me relentlessly…

The fourth time, the fifth time, the sixth time... until Jiang Zhao also began to have memories... My head was throbbing with pain, and Jiang Mingzhuo was simply insane. The last time, he and Jiang Zhao had already "discussed" it before they met me: I would nominally marry him, but in reality... I belonged to two people.

The twisted, disgusting emotions left me confused, and then I "woke up."

"Ah!" I cried out in excruciating pain, but my resistance was too weak. I opened my eyes in horror, my body burning hot as if it were about to melt.

In the dim light, a dark head stood before my bear, holding me tightly. "Xiao Fu, I love you, I love you so much..."

I tried to struggle, but I couldn't wake up. I could clearly feel Jiang Mingzhu kissing me, his thing inside me. This one-sided lovemaking seemed endless, and he had plundered my whole being from the inside out.

Whoosh, whoosh... A flash of white light went through my mind. I blinked, and tears rolled down my cheeks. Jiang Mingzhuo held me down and smiled. "Xiao Fu, you are mine. I love you. You can't leave me. We will have a child. I promise you, this time you will marry me. We will definitely be happy."

I got goosebumps all over my body. Jiang Mingzhuo hugged me tightly and kissed me. The intense love in my body wouldn't stop.

The car seemed to lurch slightly.

I opened my eyes abruptly. Because of the nightmare, fear made me break out in a light sweat again. I was still in the back seat of that Maybach. Jiang Mingzhuo next to me was dressed neatly and respectably. He was looking down at the laptop on his lap. The back seat was lit with a dim orange light.

"..." I reflexively looked down. But there was nothing there. The plaid coat was still on me, and the skin under the sweater was fair and soft, without any marks. Apart from the sweat seeping from my back, it seemed like I really had just been dreaming.

Am I really that badly mentally ill? My face was deathly pale, my eyelashes trembled, and I looked at Jiang Mingzhuo: "What... what's wrong with me?"

"You're asleep." Jiang Mingzhuo's voice was low, a slight smile playing on his lips, his eyes dark and deep, a cold feeling slowly creeping up on me, making me tremble and my voice choke.

I lowered my head. "I want to go home."

"Where to?" he asked, shifting his stance with his legs crossed, exuding an air of nobility, as if the utterly insane man in his dream and the elegant young nobleman before him were not the same person at all.

“West District Apartment…” A barely audible, weak voice escaped my throat. The mental and physical torment Jiang Mingzhuo had inflicted on me made me want to leave him. I couldn’t go back to the apartment I shared with Yu Xu, so I could only pin my hopes on Ye Fenglin.

Jiang Mingzhuo remained silent for a long time, then suddenly let out a very soft sigh, "Look where you are outside."

I turned my head, and a towering luxury apartment building came into view. The walls of the apartment seemed to glow in the night. I was somewhat surprised, but soon, I began to feel afraid. How did Jiang Mingzhuo know where I lived? @Unlimited good articles, all at Literary City

He remained calm and composed. "Ye Fenglin had a fight with his parents. Although he was discharged from the hospital, he resolutely refused to go home. This is the only house under Ye Fenglin's name with the best security."

Jiang Mingzhuo's eyes held an obvious mockery, but he concealed the depth in his eyes and smiled slightly.

"I happen to have a private apartment here, so I just gave you a ride back. If there's nothing else, you can get out of the car."

The gentle, leisurely voice revealed nothing amiss. Was it just a nightmare? I dazedly pushed open the car door and hesitated as I walked towards the apartment, until I took the private elevator straight to Ye Fenglin's house.

Was it a dream? My illness is getting worse. Maybe I should take that doctor's advice and have someone sleep with me every night...

Ye Fenglin was initially very angry.

But seeing my dazed look, a hint of confusion flashed in his dark eyes beneath his long eyebrows.

I hugged him tightly and whispered, "Stay with me, don't leave me alone tonight..."

Ye Fenglin's expression was serious. He silently held me without saying a word. I tilted my head up slightly, and when he lowered his eyes, his carefree and nonchalant demeanor seemed to have subsided considerably, replaced by seriousness and a sense of responsibility.

I breathed a sigh of relief, nestled in Ye Fenglin's arms, and lay down on the bed to sleep quietly.

After a night, I felt much better. I went downstairs in my fluffy slippers. The apartment manager had prepared French toast, buttered crisps, fresh fruit juice, seafood and vegetable salad, and cream cheese for breakfast.

The maid pulled out a chair for me to sit opposite Ye Fenglin. I picked up a knife and gently cut a slice into the bread sprinkled with cocoa powder. Thick, sticky milk slowly slid down the bread, and my lower abdomen contracted in waves.

It was supposed to be a very appetizing dessert, but I felt nauseous and couldn't help but go to the bathroom, where I vomited up everything I had eaten.

The housekeeper was waiting for me at the door.

I dried off the mess, walked out of the bathroom, looked at the housekeeper, thought for a moment, called out to her, and asked her to buy me some contraceptive pills.

“You should remind Young Master Ye to take proper precautions.” The housekeeper, a woman in her thirties, looked at me with a mixture of sympathy and disapproval of Ye Fenglin.

"Thank you for your help." My fists clenched and unclenched repeatedly, my mind a complete mess.