Confession (Part 1)

The commotion surrounding the new emperor's coronation ceremony had not yet subsided, but in the Zhu family's villa, life seemed to have been filtered of its clamor, revealing an untimely tranquility.

Zhiwei went out several times to investigate suitable places in the capital to open restaurants.

You wouldn't know unless you investigated. There are many rules in the capital. Even selling potted flowers involves flower associations, and there are also guilds for opening restaurants. You have to abide by the relevant agreements. It's much more complicated than in Lingnan.

Fortunately, Zhiwei is not in a hurry to open a store, so they have plenty of time to learn more about it.

Besides, Zhiwei has been living a carefree life during her stay at the Zhu residence.

Cheng Yuzhi treated her extremely well, taking care of everything from her food and clothing to her lodging and transportation. She also treated Shao Zhao with great kindness, often inviting the two of them over to study and play with Zhu Sheng.

The warm spring sunshine made everyone a little lazy.

That afternoon, Zhiwei had just woken up from her nap when Shaozhao knocked on the door.

Her face flushed slightly, and she twisted the newly made pale yellow ribbon in her hand: "Sister, I heard the other day that the lantern market in the south of the city is opening today, and I want to go and have a look."

Zhiwei was admiring her increasingly round face in the mirror when she heard this. She raised an eyebrow and said, "Since there's such an event, why don't we join in?"

Shao Zhao's face turned even redder for no reason, as if it had been rouged, and she muttered softly, "But, didn't Zhu Sheng and the young master pester you to fly kites in the courtyard yesterday?"

“That’s the afternoon’s schedule. The lantern festival is in the evening, so the times don’t conflict.” Zhiwei perked up and took out a peach blossom silver hairpin from her vanity case, inserting it into her freshly styled hair. “Look, isn’t it pretty?”

"Sister, what I mean is..." Seeing that Zhiwei was about to leave with her, Shao Zhao finally mustered up her courage, "I have an appointment!"

"Sister, you shouldn't go with me." Shao Zhao's heart was pounding, and she quickly blushed as she left the room.

Zhiwei paused, then pointed at herself in the mirror: Me? A third wheel?

——

As dusk settles and the city lights begin to twinkle, the night in Beijing is ignited by millions of lights, shining as brightly as day.

Shao Zhao stood by the stone bridge they had agreed upon, gazing at the shimmering light reflected in the water below, broken by the lamplight, his palms slightly sweaty.

She always felt a gaze following her from behind, subtle yet impossible to ignore, like a spider's web brushing against her.

She instinctively turned around, only to see a sea of ​​heads, unable to pinpoint the source of the gaze. Perhaps it was just her imagination? She took a deep breath, suppressing the inexplicable flutter in her heart.

Why not yet...?

"Miss Shao Zhao!" Sun Wei, slightly out of breath, squeezed out from the crowd.

He changed out of the coarse cloth short jacket he usually wore in the military camp and put on a brand new indigo fine cloth long gown. His figure was still burly, and standing in front of the petite Shao Zhao, he looked like a small mountain, making Shao Zhao feel a little awkward.

"Brother Sun." Shao Zhao looked up at him, met his eyes, and her heart skipped a beat again.

"Have you been waiting long?" Sun Wei rubbed his hands apologetically. "There were a lot of people on the street, and it took some effort to squeeze through."

"It's alright," Shao Zhao shook his head repeatedly, like a rattle-drum.

Seeing this, Sun paused for a moment, then stretched out his hand as if casting a spell, with an oil paper package lying in his palm: "Freshly roasted chestnuts, still hot. I feel like you girls all like sweet things. Here, have a taste."

Shao Zhao took it, her fingertips touching his slightly calloused palm, and quickly withdrew.

The warmth of the chestnuts seeped through the oil paper, warming me right to the core.

"Thank you, Brother Sun." She bent down and peeled one open; the golden chestnut kernel was soft, sweet, and fragrant.

Sun Wei seemed to have accomplished something great, and breathed a sigh of relief. He looked at her and said, "Let's go. There are riddle-guessing games ahead. It's quite lively."

The crowd pushed them forward.

Sun carefully stood beside Shao Zhao, his broad shoulders shielding her from the crowd.

Shao Zhao secretly glanced at his tense profile, and then remembered the day the military camp was attacked, when he walked out from the firelight and lifted her into the air in one swift motion—

This seemingly cool move caused sparks to fly to the crotch of Shao Zhao's pants, startling Sun Wei into shouting, "Shao Zhao, your crotch!"

Shaozhao:?

Seeing that the outermost part of his pants was charred, Sun Wei quickly put Shao Zhao down and tried to salvage the situation with the hem of his shirt: "Your manhood..."

Sun paused for a moment, then regained his composure and reassured, "It's alright, it's alright. If a radish wants to grow tall, its branches and leaves have to be pruned a few times."

Shaozhao:!

"No, I'm not!" Finally understanding what Sun Wei was suffering from, Shao Zhao laughed loudly, "I'm a woman."

“Women’s clothing is only more suitable for military camps,” Shao Zhao added.

Sun Wei's expression froze, the firelight flickered, and he met Shao Zhao's reddened eyes.

There was a light in Shao Zhao's eyes. Sun Wei followed Shao Zhao's gaze upwards and realized that the dark clouds had dispersed and the sky was full of stars.

——

The lantern market was like a cascading galaxy, with lanterns of all colors vying for attention.

Sun Wei's gaze fell on a rabbit lantern not far away. The lantern was exquisitely made, with fluffy white ears and eyes inlaid with red glass beads. He paused and pointed at the lantern: "That one looks just like you."

"ah?"

“When your older sister dumped you on me, your eyes were red, like a frightened little rabbit.” Sun Weifei glanced at her quickly. “I thought to myself, how can there be such a shy little boy?”

"I never expected this..."

"I am a girl!"

The two exchanged a knowing smile. Sun Wei thought to himself, "Shao Zhao is indeed the sister who shares my mind. She must be very happy at today's lantern festival."

As for Shao Zhao, her heart felt a gentle, bittersweet sensation, as if it had been lightly struck. Sun Wei had seen through the bewilderment and confusion of those newly arrived in the army.

"Guess the riddles! Guess the riddles! A lucky prize awaits you!" The vendor's shouts broke the awkward silence.

A stall was decorated with many lanterns, and riddles were hung beneath them.

"Take a look?" Sun asked.

...

One after another, I received a set of exquisite little lamps.

Shao Zhao was very quick-witted, as was Sun Wei. The two always gave the same answer in unison, their tacit understanding was natural.

Sun Wei grinned, revealing his white teeth, and enthusiastically picked out a few more riddles. Shao Zhao guessed them all correctly, reaping a bountiful harvest. Holding a full load of lanterns, Sun Wei actually looked like a child who had received a treasure, which was quite rare.

"This way, we can also make string lanterns..."

"String of lights, what are those?"

"It's just stringing lanterns together, it's so pretty, it would look great hanging under the eaves as decoration." Sun Wei lowered his eyes, his expression gentle, holding the lantern in his hand, his thoughts seemingly drifting to a distant place.

Shao Zhao's cheeks flushed as she looked at him, and she hugged the lotus lantern in her arms tightly, feeling that the light reflected in her heart was brighter than the stars in the sky.

.

At the edge of the crowd, two hooded figures cleverly used the stalls and people as cover, their eyes fixed on the couple in front of them.

Zhiwei pulled down his hat brim, his smile almost reaching his ears. Zhu Mingyu stood beside him, holding the sugar figurine that Zhiwei hadn't finished eating.

"You think I'm in the way? I'm going to follow you anyway. I came here just because I smelled it." Zhiwei said arrogantly, arms crossed.

She thought Shao Zhao had made an appointment with someone else, but it turned out to be that guy Sun Wei.

"Tsk, what a big oaf, carrying such a bunch of lights, doesn't he find it cumbersome?"

Zhiwei muttered softly, but the light in her eyes shone brighter than the lanterns lining the street: "But... a rabbit lantern? Like Shao Zhao? Sun Wei, that blockhead, I never would have guessed, he's quite the expert!"

"There's a chance! Who knows, there might be a chance!" Zhiwei rubbed her hands excitedly, feeling even more excited than the person involved.

But soon, Zhiwei remembered someone Sun Wei had mentioned in the army, someone who seemed very important to him. If that was the case, Shao Zhao's feelings for him were not unrequited!

Zhiwei unconsciously moved her feet to follow the two, trying to find a better angle to observe. Her eyes would occasionally glance at the little trinkets she liked, and when Zhu Mingyu saw this, he quickly took out his purse and bought them.

Only when he could no longer carry anything else did Zhu Mingyu turn around and tell Zhiwei to wait for him where she was. He would first return the trinkets he was carrying to the carriage.

Zhiwei nodded. She was so engrossed in thinking about Shao Zhao's feelings that she didn't pay attention to where she was going and suddenly bumped into a solid "wall" from behind.

"Ouch!" Zhiwei stumbled, her hood knocked askew, and she almost fell over.

She turned around angrily: "Who is it! Can't you walk far..."

The word "eye" was stuck in her throat, but when she saw who it was, she forced it back down.

Under the flickering lamplight, Zhu Liji, dressed in a dark-colored casual outfit, was looking down at her.

"Your Highness, Your Highness." Zhiwei was speechless for a moment, her tone obsequious but she subconsciously pulled her hood down even lower, her heart pounding: Why is he everywhere?

Like a spirit behind him.

"You seem to be in good spirits," Zhu Liji said. He had just finished speaking with Wang Miaoxiao and had run into Zhiwei on his way back to the mansion.

Since Zhiwei regained consciousness, the two of them have never met alone again. Every time they do meet, Zhiwei is like a mouse encountering a cat, her soul almost leaving her body.

He's nothing like the arrogant person he used to be.

"Heh." Zhu Liji's lips curled into a faint smile, a smile that seemed both mocking and something else, as he glanced at Shao Zhao and Sun Wei's retreating figures. "You have the leisure to keep watch for someone?"

Zhu Liji wanted to say a few more sarcastic remarks, but then he suddenly remembered that a while ago, Zhu Mingyu had barged into his study and tearfully complained about his failed attempt to persuade the man in front of him to enter the palace as an official.

Speaking of which, Zhu Mingyu has always been close to him since childhood. Even though they didn't grow up together, he always liked to follow him around enthusiastically.

I'll help you out.

Zhu Liji signaled to dismiss the servants, only ordering Zhiwei to stay by his side.

The two walked side by side in silence, still following behind Shao Zhao, yet they seemed out of place amidst the surrounding noise.

After waiting for a long time, Zhu Liji finally spoke: "Mingyu, he really wants you to stay in the palace."

"Don't you know how he feels?"

Zhiwei paused, her heart trembling slightly as if touched by something, only to be quickly suppressed.

She didn't say anything.

“He once told me that your biggest wish is to be self-reliant, open your own restaurant, and live an ordinary life in the city.”

Zhu Liji's tone remained calm, as if he were stating something that had nothing to do with him.

Zhiwei looked up at him, the lamplight casting flickering shadows on his face, obscuring his expression.

That's true, but the way he said it sounded jarring.

Zhu Liji did not stop walking. His gaze swept over a child being held in his parents' arms by the roadside, crying and asking for a lantern. Then it swept over several ragged beggars in the distance, their eyes longingly fixed on the sugar figurine stall.

"Ordinary life in the city."

Zhu Liji repeated these seven words.

"Do you think you can live as an ordinary citizen for the rest of your life?"

Zhiwei felt a chill run down her spine.

"Without your help, the salt merchant in Lingnan would have been a wronged soul long ago; the Yan family might have survived for a few more days if you hadn't run away from your marriage and brought revenge on the Wang family, but they are ultimately vines clinging to power, and they will wither in an instant; in the Shu County army camp, you saw through the arsenic, which saved thousands of soldiers from diarrhea and exhaustion."

“Zhang Xingzhong, and those cooks and soldiers whose names you don’t know… you saved their lives and witnessed them die as easily as ants.”

Zhu Liji's voice was not loud, but every word was like a knife.

He stopped, turned around, and said with a hint of sarcasm, "You always want to hide, to escape, to live a peaceful life in that little restaurant of your dreams. But where in this world is there a pure land?"

"A butcher's daughter, simply because she is beautiful, can be abducted by a powerful man to be his concubine; a street vendor, simply because he blocks the carriage of a nobleman, has his back broken by a horse's hooves."

"Just like Shao Zhao—"

Zhu Liji's sharp gaze pierced Zhiwei: "If you hadn't taken pity on her and taken her in, where would she be right now? In the brothel? Or in a mass grave?"

Not far away, Shao Zhao's clear laughter could be faintly heard. Sun Weizheng awkwardly protected her, avoiding a drunkard who was running around recklessly.

"Can you protect her for a while, or for a lifetime?"

Zhu Liji's voice was even lower, carrying a cold, suffocating power.

"As long as you are an ordinary citizen, you will always be a fish on someone else's chopping board!"

"Your skills and your cleverness are nothing but a joke in the face of real power. If you were just that woman running a restaurant in Lingnan, how many unseen arrows do you think would silently pierce your throat?"

A chilly night wind blew by, and Zhiwei felt icy cold all over.

Zhu Liji's words were like cold steel needles, piercing her deeply.

“Mingyu is naive. He believes your carefree attitude and says he will protect you. But how can the deceit and treachery of this world be solved by someone else’s ‘protection’? Only by standing at a high enough position can one be qualified to talk about being carefree.”

Zhu Liji looked at Zhiwei's suddenly pale face, a faint emotion flashing in his eyes, like pity, or like some kind of cold confirmation.

"You're smart and ruthless, but your vision is too narrow. Focusing only on the small area around the stove is ultimately a waste."

He leaned slightly closer to Zhiwei's ear, his warm breath brushing against her cold earlobe, but his words were as cold as ice: "Think of Shao Zhao, think of yourself."

"Is it better to be an ant that can be crushed at will for the rest of your life, or... seize the opportunity and climb up?"

"Climb high enough so that your skills are no longer just for filling your stomach. Even if you are just a cook, as long as you get close to power, you can make the people you care about smile peacefully under your wings."

A long silence permeated the bustling market.

Zhiwei could hear her own heart pounding like a drum.

Those fragments of memories about power struggles that she desperately wanted to escape surged up clearly, carrying a rusty, bloody smell.

Zhu Liji is right. Being ordinary means being powerless, and it means that anyone can step forward and trample on you.

That last vestige of struggle and hope, like a burnt-out wick, was suddenly extinguished.

Instead, there is a cold, hard quality, shaped by reality and honed by its sharp edges.

“Alright.” Zhiwei spoke, her voice a little hoarse but exceptionally clear, “I’ll take the position of female official.”

There were no grand pronouncements, no tearful gratitude, only a desperate and ruthless acceptance of fate after being driven to the brink.

Zhiwei twitched the corners of her mouth, revealing an expression that could hardly be called a smile.

The lantern market was still bustling and lively, as if nothing had changed.

Only Zhiwei herself knew that the path she had once dreamed of—the path to an ordinary life in the city—had been completely broken and collapsed.

But the ladder to heaven leading to the palace gates before her did not allow her to turn back at will.