Chapter 21 Cold Evening (Part 3) "What if she disregards everything, we must..."

"Xu Fu, you actually kept a prostitute as a mistress! What a disgrace to your family!"

"My Xu family will never allow a lowly prostitute to enter our home, much less acknowledge that bastard. Throw him out!"

"You little bastard, you dare to use the surname Xu? How come you're so tough? Why don't you go die with your mother!"

...

Years later, Lan Huaien never expected that she would have that dream again.

Having served as an official in the imperial court for so many years, he had grown accustomed to this kind of life. His childhood memories were too distant; he thought he would never recall those dark and hopeless days again.

As for Xu Zhen, he was no longer enough to arouse the fear and anger in his heart, even though he saw his face, which was three or four parts similar to Xu Fu's, every day.

The dream was clearer and more vivid than his memory. The beatings, the insults, the blood, the saliva... the pain and hatred were incredibly real. He was surrounded by vicious faces, his head was being pressed down so hard he couldn't lift it, he was suffocating and desperate.

He struggled desperately, falling into the abyss, until a sharp thorn pierced his chest. In that instant, he jerked open his heavy eyelids, but the room remained pitch black. His limbs seemed nailed to the bed, and he couldn't move for a long time.

After a long while, he tentatively let out a breath, realizing that he was still alive, and then forced himself to regain his senses.

He slowly moved to the window, but couldn't see any light through the crack. It was still dark, and he didn't know the time, but he couldn't sleep at all. He was so bored that his thoughts began to wander aimlessly.

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Xu Fu's most glorious moment was when he passed the imperial examination as a second-class Jinshi (a successful candidate in the highest level of the imperial examinations). However, his official career was full of ups and downs, and he spent most of his life in the officialdom without making any significant achievements. The highest official rank he ever attained was only a fifth-rank official.

Because of his handsome appearance, Xu Fu had many romantic affairs in his youth. The most outrageous one was keeping a courtesan as his mistress.

The woman's name was Liu Mei, and she happened to have a pair of delicate willow-leaf eyebrows. She was graceful and charming, and when she won the title of the most beautiful courtesan, she was a famous courtesan sought after by the wealthy young men of the capital.

At that time, Xu Fu was infatuated with her beauty and secretly redeemed her, and then secretly built a house for her to live in.

At that time, Xu Fu was already married to a woman surnamed Feng. Feng was a proper lady from a respectable family. Although she was a bit fiery, her family was very helpful to Xu Fu's career, so he naturally did not want this trivial matter to affect his future.

If he cannot take Liu Mei as a concubine, then she can only be a mistress.

Liu Mei was confined to that dark and gloomy mansion, spending her days playing the zither, singing songs, and serving Xu Fu. Later, she gave birth to a son for Xu Fu. As Liu Mei's beauty faded, Xu Fu gradually neglected her, but he dared not acknowledge the son back, and continued to have the mother and son live outside.

Liu Mei came from a brothel and had an innate indifference towards her own son. But he was still her flesh and blood, and apart from providing him with the necessary food and shelter, she didn't care much about anything else.

The lonely days were monotonous and long. Occasionally, resentment would arise, and she could only vent it on her son. The harsh curses were so filthy they were unbearable to hear, but the little boy couldn't understand a word. He could only discern from his mother's emotions when to be afraid, and a strange darkness and heaviness weighed on his heart, making him feel miserable.

She endured this for three or four years before Liu Mei finally gave in. She fell ill and gradually withered away. Later, she vaguely sensed that her days were numbered. Looking at her thin son in her arms, she suddenly realized that she could not delay any longer and gritted her teeth to make a firm decision.

Liu Mei chose an auspicious day and, with her son, went straight to the Xu family mansion. In front of countless onlookers, she tearfully recounted her son's background, then turned and smashed her head against the stone lion in front of the gate, dying instantly.

A four-year-old boy stood at the bottom of the steps in front of the door, his body splattered with warm blood. He opened his peach-blossom eyes, which he had inherited from his prostitute mother, looking innocent and bewildered, unaware of what this meant.

He only burst into tears when a strange servant came out of the house, grabbed him by the collar, and led him away from his mother.

Xu Fu, realizing the truth could no longer be concealed, finally acknowledged this bloodline. At that time, he already had an eldest son, Xu Zhen, and the child born to his concubine was his second son, named Xu Yue. It was only much later that they were added to the family genealogy.

Despite her fuss, Madam Feng still brought her mistress into the backyard.

As for how the orphaned child would live in the future, Xu Fu entrusted the matter entirely to the inner quarters and would no longer concern himself with him. Of course, Madam Feng would not let him have an easy time. Even though Xu Yue bore the surname Xu and the status of the second son of the Xu family, his status was not even comparable to that of a lowly servant.

Xu Yue thought that once he returned to the Xu family mansion from the outer residence with his father, he could openly call him "Father" and finally have a home. Little did he know that the nightmare would begin the moment he was recognized as a member of the family.

He was constantly subjected to ridicule and humiliation from everyone around him, and his young body was always covered with new wounds on top of old ones. He had to stay far away from Madam Feng, otherwise he would be severely beaten.

He was a "lowlife" in his birth mother's eyes; his own mother looked down on him and herself. He was a "bastard" in the Xu family's eyes; no one cared whether he lived or died. His thin body looked like he could die at any moment.

The elder brother, Xu Zhen, was considered by many to be a prodigy, whose intelligence and talent surpassed that of their father. However, unlike Xu Fu's selfishness and cowardice, Xu Zhen was a stubborn man of his word, and also appeared upright and honest.

Xu Zhen would occasionally visit his half-brother Xu Yue in the backyard, secretly giving him some food and scolding the wicked servants along the way. However, due to Madam Feng's dislike, these few acts of protection were merely a drop in the ocean.

A four- or five-year-old child lived in constant fear. He endured this day after day for hundreds of days and nights.

Later, Xu Yue finally died beside the stone lion. The moment he closed his eyes, he felt a sense of liberation.

That day, it was pouring rain. Xu's servant picked him up like a piece of trash, gave a few copper coins to the beggars on the roadside, and ordered them to throw the body into a mass grave.

When he opened his eyes again, Xu Yue was no longer in this world. He looked at the mass grave piled high with corpses, and in the stench, he shoved through the severed limbs and remains. Before him were many figures, and with all his might, he grabbed the hem of an old eunuch's robe.

From that moment on, Xu Yue was no more. The one who survived was Lan Huai'en, the adopted son of the eunuch Lan Zezhong.

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Lan Huaien recalled the days he spent in the palace. Although it was still like walking on thin ice, with Lan Zezhong's protection, he felt much more at ease. At least he had someone to rely on, a place to stay.

He knew perfectly well that his adoptive father wasn't entirely devoted to him either.

Lan Zezhong was an old man in the palace with a high status among the eunuchs. He had adopted more than a dozen sons who, after being taught by him, settled down in various places and would come to show their filial piety to their adoptive father from time to time.

Lan Huaien was neither the youngest nor the most intelligent, but he learned to flatter and fawn very early on, which is why Lan Zezhong liked him the most.

And what they call liking someone is nothing more than spoiling them like a cat or dog. When it really comes down to it, everyone turns cold.

He remembered asking his adoptive father why he wouldn't be castrated.

Lan Zezhong replied, “You are a good child, still young, and your godfather can’t bear to ruin you. Keep your lineage, wait a few more years, and perhaps you can have a son or daughter. That bloodline can then bear the Lan surname, so that your life will not have been in vain. This is the greatest regret of a eunuch’s life. Although I have a group of adopted sons, they are not my biological children. Huai’en, I am doing this for your sake.”

He wore a grateful smile on his face and murmured words of great kindness, but in his heart he scoffed.

Not to mention, when he grew a little older, he accidentally learned that his adoptive father had another reason for not letting him be castrated.

It was a gamble, a bet that once he shed the rottenness typical of eunuchs, he would have extraordinary fortune. He had a handsome appearance, was sensible, and had a pleasant voice; even the late emperor had praised him several times.

Even knowing that this "family affection" was not pure, Lan Zezhong still felt indebted to him for his kindness.

It was precisely because of Lan Zezhong's deliberate cover-up and his own extreme caution that, apart from a few loyal personal eunuchs, this identity had never been discovered by outsiders.

Until the end of this year.

That day, she.

Lan Huaien, wrapped in a blanket, leaned against the window, staring blankly outside. The sky gradually brightened into a shade of indigo, with a few faint lights in the distance, seemingly lamps. The charcoal fire inside had long since gone out, but a faint smell of ashes lingered. A chilly wind seeped in through the narrow cracks.

He sneezed, his lips trembling. He rubbed his nose and frowned: What's there to be so dramatic about? Life has been going on just fine.

After all these years, doesn't he still know what he's living for?

Lan Huaien lowered her eyelashes and exhaled a breath of hot air.

He had been beaten countless times, and each time he regained consciousness, he was filled with despair. He was so timid that he didn't even have the courage to pray for peace.

Later, living in the palace, he seemed to have no ulterior motives. He could endure anything, and he would seize whatever he wanted by any means necessary. He lived however he pleased, willingly playing the villain, determined to be above sticks and fists.

I can cry as I please, and I can laugh as I please.

Born a piece of duckweed, I will surely die a wild ghost.

But a thought suddenly popped into his mind: since he didn't know how to live for himself, why not live for others for once?

She's now in the same boat as the Crown Prince. Whether he threatens her or manipulates her, he's essentially clinging to her. He's done this many times before; crossing the river and then discarding the bridge is a common tactic.

This time, perhaps because he had gambled too much, he held great hope and was especially unwilling for the Crown Prince to lose. However, beyond this gamble, he couldn't help but harbor some other delusions.

Thinking of Yan Chao, his thoughts gradually cleared. He was even a little afraid: what if, what if she disregarded everything and tried to kill him?

A note from the author: