Bonus chapter for 17,000 nutrient solutions: "My cousin is also very aggrieved..."

The King of Qin was furious, even enraged. Historically, the wrath of an emperor had led to the deaths of millions. That night, the entire city of Handan fell into a deathly silence.

The Queen of Qin was filled with fear and trepidation at the banquet, and developed a fever in the latter half of the night.

Overwhelmed with grief and indignation, Empress Dowager Wang seemed to have been reminded of her humiliating past, and she suddenly fell ill.

Ying Zheng took care of both without taking off his clothes, and for a time he was immersed in anger and could not extricate himself.

Banban was still feverish, and she held Ying Zheng's hand, tears streaming down her face. "Cousin, don't kill those children, don't kill innocent commoners. What ability do they have to get the musicians to compose dances? All they worry about every day is eating and drinking. How innocent they are!"

Ying Zheng wiped away her tears, his hands clenched so tightly that the veins bulged, the lines running across the back of his hands and disappearing into his sleeves. After a long while, he nodded: "Okay."

"How is my sister-in-law?"

"He took his medicine and fell asleep. He was talking nonsense the whole time." Ying Zheng closed his eyes, a chilling coldness lingering between his brows.

"Handan is such a heartbreaking place. We'll never come back." Banban gently wiped his eyes, feeling the moisture.

"It's my fault. I promised to let you come back to vent your anger." "I'm not angry."

Banban held his hand and said, "There is always a price to pay for achieving unification. How can everyone be willing to be annexed by others? When people are facing death, they always want to say or do something that will make others unhappy. These are just the struggles of the Zhao state before its death."

“As the Queen of Qin, I enjoy boundless glory. It is insignificant for me to occasionally suffer some insults. I don’t care.” She earnestly raised her hand to stroke his warm face. “However, I feel sorry for my cousin, and I also feel sorry for my aunt.”

"No matter how many absurd things my sister-in-law and I fabricate, the bottom line is that we're trying to slander you and tarnish your reputation. My sister-in-law suffered an undeserved misfortune, but what did my cousin do wrong?"

"My cousin is also very aggrieved."

"The greater the obstacle, the more it proves that we are right."

No matter what, in Banban's mind, it was wrong for Zhao Jun to force young children to jump off the city wall and die for their country.

Ying Zheng suddenly buried the person in his cousin's arms.

The next day at dawn, Ji Changyue had mostly recovered her senses. Despite her illness, she was determined to visit the old Ji family residence. Banban's fever subsided, so she accompanied her.

The first house in Zhu Lane belonged to the Ji family. The once magnificent gate had been weathered and ravaged by countless blows. The gold on the gate had been chipped off one by one, and many insulting words had been slashed on it with sharp tools.

Pushing open the door, I found the place completely ransacked; not even a single mud brick remained. The peach tree in the main courtyard had withered, and all the periwinkles in the small courtyard had been uprooted.

The only thing still visible on the wall was the charcoal line depicting the height difference between Banban and her cousin when they were young; she touched it wistfully.

Dwelling on the past would only make her feel uncomfortable, so she cheered herself up and put on a smile again to help Ji Changyue up.

Ji Changyue stared at the wall. "I still remember how you always said that if you ate more, you could surpass Zheng'er. You would compare yourselves every month. Seeing him grow taller and stronger, you were quite frustrated for a while."

She clearly couldn't laugh, yet she still had to talk about these things.

Banban gently squeezed her hand, "If you have any troubles in your heart, please tell me. I will always be your closest person."

"There is no Empress Dowager or Queen here, only Yueji and Banban."

Ji Changyue paused again and again, grasped Banban's hand, and looked up at the boundless sky. "Looking back now, it has been such a long life. I don't even know where to begin."

"There are so many things I can't say to Zheng'er, I have to keep them to myself..." she said with a self-deprecating laugh, "It's so painful."

"Sometimes I think that a woman with even a little bit of beauty is truly doomed in this world if she doesn't have a powerful backer. Of the singing girls who were forcibly bought into Lü Buwei's mansion back then, some died and some were crippled. Only I became the Empress Dowager. But the title of Empress Dowager sounds glamorous, but it seems that I am just an appendage of the powerful. If there is no king, what is the Empress Dowager?"

"I'm just lucky enough to have a son who does everything he wants to do."

When did her aunt come up with these thoughts? Banban didn't know what to say, so she just held her hand tightly.

“I hated those powerful and wealthy people, but in the end I became one of them myself, so it seems I have no right to hate them anymore.”

“I hate the Zhao army who insulted me as a prostitute in the Zhao Kingdom back then. They forced me to submit to men in exchange for peace,” Ji Changyue smiled with relief as she met Banban’s suddenly constricted pupils. “I can only convince myself that doing that kind of thing is pleasurable and that I am willing to do it, otherwise I don’t know how I would get through every night.”

"Naturally, for them, it would be an honor to humiliate the wife of a prince of Qin."

"How could you do such a thing—" Banban suddenly became agitated, her fair neck turning red with anger, and she was about to explode with rage.

“Those are all in the past. My persistence is not only to protect Zheng’er, but also to prepare for the future.” Ji Changyue pressed her hand, signaling her to listen to her finish speaking.

“I waited for Ying Yiren to come and get me, thinking that the days ahead would be filled with glory and happiness… He loved me, but he loved the power in his hands and the throne beneath him even more. What am I compared to the throne?”

“Even my entire glory is tied to the power and the throne that he cares about. I have no right to ask him to give up those who only love me. It’s enough that he treats me well. I am content.”

“I love him, and I hope to find healing for my wounds by his side.” Ji Changyue’s eyes welled up with tears. “I thought we could stay together for a long time, and that would be enough.”

"But he's dead. I can't accept it. How could he just die like that?"

Banban hesitated, then hurriedly grabbed a handkerchief to wipe away her tears.

Ji Changyue shook her head, then mustered her spirits. "I resent his early death, so I refuse to remain chaste for him. I spend my days in a drunken stupor, as if I've returned to the days in Handan, numbing myself with pleasure and temporarily forgetting those unpleasant things."

"Thinking back now," she said sarcastically, wiping the marks off her face, "when did I ever love Lao Ai? I was just unwilling to accept it, and I wanted someone like him to appear and replace Ying Yiren in loving me."

She desperately needed someone to prove that she was good, that she had value, and that she deserved to be loved.

“I gave him power and money, but he couldn’t even love me wholeheartedly.” Ji Changyue chuckled. “Now I finally understand that relying on others will only lead to disappointment, and my worth doesn’t need anyone else to prove it.”

"With all of Zhao Jun killed, the ailments in my body seemed to vanish along with them. I felt an unprecedented sense of comfort and relief. I think I am finally a completely new me. Let the former Ji Changyue remain in Handan forever."

“It was my son Zheng who killed all the Zhao soldiers for me, allowing me to escape.”

Banban understood the last part, and she smiled happily, "Sister-in-law, no, you saved yourself!"

"Um?"

“If you don’t figure it out yourself, no matter how much your cousin does, it will be in vain. Your body is also saving itself.”

"Do you know how frightening it was when you fell ill yesterday? And today you're able to walk around! You're still young! You have unlimited potential!"

"Without the king, the Empress Dowager is nothing, but you happen to have a king who loves you. Why should we think about those unfounded things? If you want to be a commoner, then hide your identity and be a commoner! If you want to be a noble, then be a noble! What's wrong with experiencing countless identities in this world? If you can't figure it out, then do it! Maybe you'll figure it out after doing it!"

"Don't just think about it," Banban said earnestly, holding Ji Changyue's hand and giving her a serious lecture.

She was worried that her aunt was developing depression and getting stuck on things like power and happiness.

Ji Changyue was stunned for a moment, then burst out laughing, "You...you look exactly like Zhao'er, no wonder you're mother and son."

"..." Banban said, "Sister-in-law, I'm serious."

Can you be serious?

"Okay, I've taken it to heart." Ji Changyue wiped her eyes and gently touched her temples. "Thank you, Banban. You're such a good child. Zheng'er is so lucky to have you."

"Having a cousin is a blessing for me." This kind of thing is a two-way street.

"Okay, okay."

"So, did you meet any handsome men while you were out?" Banban lowered her voice and inquired discreetly. "Boss Yun's business is booming, and she's incredibly beautiful. I've heard that everything in your shop sells out every day."

Ji Changyue used the alias Yun Shuyue when she was away from home.

Ji Changyue snorted, "Having seen so many new things every day, I don't care about that kind of thing anymore." She also said that seeking out actors was just a way to numb herself and escape the pain.

After a fulfilling life, one feels much lighter.

Especially after falling ill last night, she dreamed of Ying Yiren. In the dream, she reached out to grab him, and he smiled gently at her, patted her head lightly, and said that it would be a long time before he could take her away, and that he had only come to see her today.

After waking up from the dream, she cried bitterly. She saw her son, Ying Zheng, kneeling by her bedside. Upon seeing that she had woken up, he hurriedly summoned the physician.

There were indeed many things she couldn't tell her son. When the words reached her lips, they all turned into the phrase, "Your mother was confused and made mistakes before."

How could Ying Zheng resent his mother? He said, "I have never resented my mother." What he cared about from beginning to end was whether his mother would choose to abandon him over those two illegitimate children.

On the way back, Banban asked Ying Zheng how he planned to deal with the common people left behind by Zhao. He had already made up his mind: "Scatter the Zhao people and relocate them to various parts of Qin in batches." As he spoke, his expression became solemn. "My cousin was right before. If we move the Qin people to Zhao, although it will fill the population of Zhao, the Qin people will also be scattered, which will not benefit Qin."

"That's good!" Banban clapped his hands in praise, beaming with joy. "The most powerful enemy of the nations has been eliminated; the other nations should be easy to deal with now!"

"By the way, cousin, did you spare those children? We can't kill children!"

"When have I ever not gone along with what you say?" Ying Zheng told her to stop nagging. "Alright, you're not fully recovered yet, why don't you rest some more?"

"You find me annoying!"

"???"

How is this argued?

On the second half of the return trip, he held his cousin and told her stories all the way. What stories? Naturally, they were the explosive stories they used to tell each other at night when they would get together to gossip about other people.

She felt nauseous listening to this, and perhaps because the car was swaying and bumpy, she actually threw up.

He was vomiting so badly that he felt dizzy and disoriented. He lay beside the car, staring at the wheels and the uneven dirt road, thinking that if he had money, he should fix the roads and improve his driving skills.

Ying Zheng was worried about her, so he brought over the accompanying physician to take her pulse.

After examining her, the imperial physician hesitated for a moment, then said, "It seems that Her Majesty the Queen is pregnant."

The couple fell silent.

Banban was stunned and suddenly touched her lower abdomen.

"What do you mean by 'as if'?" Ying Zheng almost grabbed the physician by the collar, his voice rising significantly. "Did the Queen's fever and illness a few days ago cause any problems? Did the bumpy journey cause any problems? Why did she vomit?"

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Author's note: How about having a daughter! I think it's impossible to be without a princess [rubbing chin.jpg]

Also, this nutrient solution is too potent; should I stop using it?