Chapter 38 Let's Let Each Other Go. You think I'd take action just because of an apology...?

The damp, dripping sound echoed across the bathroom tiles... Yan Quan could feel Yan Ceyan's hand, which was pressed tightly against the back of her neck, trembling slightly.

She trembled uncontrollably because of the painful memories of her past breakup.

"Hoo..." Yan Quan murmured and sighed softly, then slowly lowered her head—this submissive posture allowed Yan Ceyan's palm to firmly press against the back of Yan Quan's neck.

In the psychology of AO relationships, such a superior-subordinate posture usually foreshadows "showing weakness and appeasement".

Yan Ceyan's palm paused for a moment, somewhat taken aback.

Based on past confrontations, Yan Quan would usually defiantly raise his head and glare at Yan Ceyan with arrogant eyes.

What happened the next second was completely unexpected by Yan Ceyan, who had no idea of ​​Yan Quan's behavior or logic.

Yan Quan remained in a submissive, "being manipulated" posture, and then... said very softly—"I'm sorry."

"..." In the reflection of the huge mirror, the tall and fierce Alpha suddenly softened, his single eyelids suddenly stretched open to form horizontal creases, and his vertical pupils were full of astonishment.

"……What did you say?"

Yan Quan's nape twitched slightly in Yan Ceyan's palm due to his heavy breathing. "I said..."

The three words were spoken slowly by Yan Quan, each syllable vibrating with a subtle tremor as they echoed from Yan Ceyan's fingertips:

"sorry."

"..." Yan Ceyan seemed to be stunned for a long time.

The entire room quieted down, and the soft dripping of water sounded like a violently beating heartbeat.

The shirt fabric rustled softly in the air as it rubbed against each other—Yan Ceyan slowly moved his taut knuckles away, loosening his grip on Yan Quan.

“Say it again, Yan Quan.”

Yan Ceyan murmured to himself in the darkness.

So Yan Quan turned around to face Yan Ceyan and stared intently at him for several seconds. Then... Yan Quan gently placed his hands on Yan Ceyan's cheeks.

The sand in the Gobi Desert of Northwest China was indeed very dry, and Yan Ceyan's skin texture was as coarse and stiff as his hair.

"Yan Ceyan, I'm sorry."

Yan Quan repeated it again.

In fact, Yan Quan had wanted to say "I'm sorry" to Yan Ceyan for a long time—across the vast Atlantic coast, Yan Quan had practiced saying "I'm sorry" countless times in the fax machine.

During the seven years she fled to Federation A, Yan Quan reflected on and reviewed more than once why she and Yan Ceyan had ended up in such a hopeless situation.

The events of that year were fraught with twists and turns, rife with conspiracies and secrets that ultimately ended badly. So—deception, manipulation, scheming… and what else?

And then there's Yan Quan himself.

Even if it wasn't her true intention, even if she was powerless to do it, even if Yan Quan herself was just a pawn in this farce.

But those cruel, hurtful, bullet-like words aimed at Yan Ceyan's weak points were all spoken by Yan Quan himself.

It was Yan Quan who, relying on Yan Ceyan's retreat and tolerance, carried out one "premeditated murder" after another with impunity.

Yan Quan is the biggest "culprit" who stands between these seven years of overwhelming hatred.

"...Yan Quan".

"Because I'm angry? You think you can appease me like this?"

Yan Ceyan stared intently into Yan Quan's eyes, his dark pupils flickering slightly, as if he were struggling to draw a breath from his chest: "Apologize..."

"Yan Quan, what do you want to apologize for?"

"all."

Yan Quan's fingers, which were resting on Yan Ceyan's cheeks, tightened slightly, the pads of his fingers sliding down his chin to his neck—this intimate gesture resembled a hug. Eighteen-year-old Yan Quan and Yan Ceyan often hugged like this.

"From the age of eighteen, everything."

"Ha..." Yan Ceyan choked out a muffled sound, carrying an unbelievable absurdity:

"Yan Quan, do you think an apology is enough...?"

Do you think I'd be swayed by a single apology...?

“I know. Yan Ceyan.”

Yan Quan's throat bobbed: "You hate me."

Put yourself in Yan Quan's shoes and consider what he did to Yan Ceyan all those years ago. If Yan Quan were Yan Ceyan, he would only hate him more.

Therefore, Yan Ceyan's 'revenge' on the show, his relentless 'demonstration' and 'warning' on the date, were all perfectly justified and sufficient in Yan Quan's view.

However… the concern and care that Yan Ceyan revealed in those subtle details made Yan Quan feel that things weren’t so bad.

And so came the "apology" that was just spoken.

"Yan Ceyan, I didn't intend to use a bet to make us continue to fight to the death."

Yan Quan's lips parted several times, but in the end, only a few sighs escaped silently: "I'll let you go."

"Then could you please leave me alone for now on this show?"

"This is the stake."

“…I’ll let you go.” Yan Ceyan lowered his eyes and stared at Yan Quan for a long time, as if trying to see through Yan Quan from the inside out with his gaze.

The standoff escalated once again, and the still air began to freeze.

In truth, Yan Ceyan was unwilling to admit that Yan Quan's few perfunctory apologies could erase the entire past, but...

Yan Ceyan secretly clenched his fingertips, forcing himself to calm his trembling heart, which had been rippled again by Yan Quan's simple "I'm sorry."

From the past to the present, it has never really changed.

As long as Yan Quan speaks, even if he knows that his words are full of lies and deception, even if it is just a transaction, even if the consequences will tear Yan Ceyan's heart to shreds...

Yan Ceyan was still influenced by Yan Quan's words.

In Yan Ceyan's eyes, Yan Quan's words always carried the highest weight. Every word Yan Quan uttered was counted.

Therefore, Yan Ceyan stared at Yan Quan for a long time before finally looking away and lowering his gaze.

"Tell me... what would it take to let you go?" Yan Ceyan asked, his tone softening slightly.

"..." Yan Quan pursed her lips, as if the next words were particularly difficult to utter: "Could you... please not send me love letters, and don't choose me for dates either?"

Yan Ceyan's gaze instantly turned cold.

"Then who should I choose?"

Yan Quan forced a smile and continued, "Besides me, there are other Omegas on this show, such as..."

For example, Ji Yao.

No way—this guy is gay, though not strictly speaking an "omega." And he and Yan Ceyan don't get along.

,

Then… Yan Quan opened his lips and said, “Lin Mo.”

"He is a graduate student at the Capital University and is very smart."

Yan Ceyan's brow twitched: "You're a PhD."

Yan Quan: "That's Shui Shuo."

Yan Ceyan: "...That's perfect, I have a military academy diploma."

"We were made in heaven."

"Lin Mo has regular features and a sincere and friendly personality," Yan Quan continued his introduction. However, he paused abruptly at the end before adding, "The important point is..."

He won't lie to you.

"Ha..." Yan Ceyan listened to Yan Quan's willingness to "tarnish his image" just to escape. Yan Ceyan felt as if a piece of lead was stuck in his throat.

"Yan Quan..." Yan Ceyan managed to squeeze out a sentence through clenched teeth: "You want me to go on a date with him (Lin Mo)?"

"..." Yan Quan remained silent for a long time, feeling a faint, sharp pain in her heart—a sour, astringent pain, like a crushed green orange.

"Mmm," Yan Quan finally said, biting her lower lip.

"I'm going on a date with someone else." Yan Ceyan's voice was starting to crackle with anger again. "And you, who are you going on a date with next time?"

“An athlete, a securities manager? An omega who’s pursuing you…” Yan Ceyan said in a deep voice, “Or, that professor.”

"Yan Quan, don't tell me that you actually have your eye on one of those four good-for-nothings."

...Yan Quan's nails dug into her flesh, clenching her fists tightly. Her lips remained tightly closed, a silent acquiescence.

Yan Ceyan's facial muscles twitched as he struggled to suppress his anger. "So you're begging for forgiveness, lowering your stance, and rushing to bring up the past to distance yourself from me—"

"Is it because of one of them?"

Yan Quan remained silent, not uttering a single word.

Yan Ceyan was furious; Yan Quan was practically a nemesis sent by heaven.

This is precisely Yan Ceyan's most conflicted emotional point: he "hates" Yan Quan. But at the same time, he doesn't want Yan Quan to choose someone else or "date" someone else.

It seems that "hatred," separated by many years and twisted into a tangled mess, is almost equivalent to "possession"—

Yan Quan could only be "possessed" by Yan Ceyan.

"Yan Quan, when did your taste become so bad?"

Even if it's just for casual fun, you should still choose something high-end.

Yan Ceyan spoke in a low, angry voice, feeling a tingling, corrosive sensation coursing through his limbs: "Even if it's just for fun, it should at least be someone of my level..."

If even they can easily gain "eligibility" for a relationship, then what am I? What about my repeated, shameless "reconciliation requests"?

Under Yan Ceyan's fierce glare, Yan Quan clenched his fist and then let it fall. "Just this once."

The moment she looked up, Yan Quan's voice trembled slightly, and her pupils seemed to be covered by a thin, transparent film: "Yan Ceyan, don't worry about me."

"Just this once. Is that okay?"

...Yan Ceyan's breath tightened again because of Yan Quan's last slightly trembling words—his heart belatedly began to ache...

It's absolutely infuriating! How can there be such a contradictory creature as Yan Quan in the world? On one hand, he arouses your anger and makes you furious, but on the other hand... he makes you feel sorry for him.

This involuntarily reminded Yan Ceyan of that summer when he glanced at the patient through the glass of the intensive care unit.

With IV lines all over his body, Yan Quan needed a machine even for the shallowest breaths. Skin and bones, he lay on the white hospital bed, as fragile as a sheet of paper.

"I will promise you."

The tiles in the corridor outside the hospital bed have witnessed the most sincere prayers and promises of eighteen-year-old Yan Ceyan.

"As long as you can wake up..."

"Whatever you ask for, I will grant it."

...

“Okay…” In his oppressive chest, the same pain he felt when he stood in the hospital corridor seemed to surge again. Yan Ceyan slowly exhaled: “I promise you. I will let you go for now.”

"I won't choose you on our second date."

"But that's all. As for the dates after that..." Yan Ce gave Yan Quan a deep look as he turned to leave.

"Yan Quan, you have no more stakes to push me away."

"Bang—" Only after watching Yan Ceyan's figure disappear at the end of the corridor did Yan Quan's body finally collapse and he knelt on the ground due to exhaustion.

"Buzz..." Yan Quan's phone screen, lying on the ground, glowed brightly, and a long list of messages had already been compiled in his inbox.

It was sent at 10 a.m., exactly the time when Yan Quan and Yan Ceyan were going out for their one-on-one date.

Fu Duannian: [Short CCTV footage of Baisha Street Community and Hongxing Middle School section of XX Road.dox]

Fu Duannian: [Baisha Street Community Household Registration and Population Management Filing.dox]

Fu Duannian: [List of proposed approvals for middle school outdoor study tours by the Beijing Municipal Education Commission.dox]

...

The densely packed numerical data was meticulously organized into categorized documents, and every piece of information related to "Yan Quan" was highlighted in red.

It seems like some kind of painstaking, clandestine pursuit.

Finally, Fu Duannian revealed his true intentions and sent several text messages—

Fu Duannian: Yan Quan, according to publicly available information online, you attended XX Noble Private Elementary and Middle School. (smile)

Fu Duannian: Ten years ago, your school did organize a charity donation event in the Baisha Street community, but the date was a week earlier than the day I met you, which is inconsistent with the case filing announced by the local education bureau (smile).

Fu Duannian: Just to be on the safe side, I haven't ruled out the possibility that the event might be postponed due to the school's own arrangements. (smile)

Fu Duannian: But I asked a friend in the public security system to check all the traffic surveillance camera records from May 14th, twelve years ago, showing the route through Baisha Street.

Fu Duannian: Comparing the surveillance footage frame by frame took me several sleepless nights (smile). In the end, I concluded that no approved or registered school buses entered or left Hongxing Middle School that day (smile).

Fu Duannian: Now, Yan Quan, I'm starting to doubt the authenticity of your words and identity information. After all, it's just a charity event; you have no reason to lie. (smiles)

Fu Duannian: Unless, you were doing something else at the time. Something with some shady reason (smiles).

Fu Duannian: So later I called and visited the academic affairs office of your junior high school, and through the student record system, I found out the homeroom teacher of your junior high school class (smiles).

Fu Duannian: I was very lucky. This veteran teacher has a habit of keeping an educational journal and vividly remembers that charity event twelve years ago (smiles).

Fu Duannian: [Image.JPG]

Fu Duannian: This is a group photo taken after the event. Yan Quan, you're not in it (smiles).

Fu Duannian: Based on the homeroom teacher's verbal account over the phone, he had no recollection of the handsome male Omegas in the class. Yan Quan, just like I said, no one who has seen you will forget your face (smiles).

Fu Duannian: But your name "Yan Quan" does indeed appear in the official academic records system. Therefore, I have a reasonable yet absurd guess—

Fu Duannian: Perhaps the identity information was entered into the system later... Yan Quan, you lived in the Baisha Street slum during your childhood (smile).

Fu Duannian: I know the above evidence is not sufficient, but... it is enough for online public opinion.

Fu Duannian: A seemingly glamorous heir to a wealthy family, he might actually be an undocumented immigrant born in a slum. Sounds pretty shocking, right? (smile)

After receiving the long message, Yan Quan replied with only a short sentence.

Yan Quan: What do you want?

This secret historical record was finally settled on the agreement between Yan Quan and Fu Duannian.

Fu Duannian: I didn't mean to expose these things and ruin your reputation. After all, I have such good feelings for you, right? (smiles)

Fu Duannian: Let's go on a date, a one-on-one date. Maybe we can find a place to have a good chat about our first meeting ten years ago. (smiles)

Fu Duannian: Oh right, and there's also Yan Ceyan (I really dislike him). I don't want him to bother my date tomorrow. If he can choose someone else... (smiles)

Yan Quan's reply was brief. Just one word. But who knows how long it took Yan Quan to mentally prepare himself just to type that one word?

Yan Quan replied: Okay.

"...Huff." The phone screen lit up for a long time before automatically turning off. The room returned to complete darkness. Yan Quan buried her face in her hands, breathing rapidly, "Huff—huff—"

For more than a decade, Yan Quan had been disguising himself perfectly, having meticulously and flawlessly prepared all his identity information.

Heaven knows there would be this crazy guy, Fu Duannian, who unexpectedly appeared and actually went through the traffic camera footage frame by frame.

White Sand Street, the slums… those dark, oppressive shadows began to engulf Yan Quan once more. Even though Yan Quan had been running forward, running forward at all costs…

But after all these years, it's still in vain.

Yan Quan seems to be trapped in the same place. His entire life has been spent confined within the dilapidated tenement building, unable to escape…

Yan Quan suspected that perhaps it was a mistake from the very beginning. Perhaps he shouldn't have returned to China in the first place.

Since that dead-lose deal seven years ago, he should have accepted the fact that it was a lose-lose situation, and he shouldn't have been clinging to wishful thinking or having any lingering nostalgia for the past.

The collapse of Yan's Real Estate, his mother's tearful pleas, and the news of Yan Zhengdong's imprisonment... He shouldn't have been soft-hearted; he should have died peacefully in Federation A.

He'll never come back.

*

"Oh dear, the wonderful 1-on-1 date has come to an end. Did everyone capture those beautiful, heartwarming memories?"

Just as Yan Quan struggled to her feet, her body trembling, an announcement rang out from inside the Love House:

"Don't be discouraged if you didn't have a date with your crush today, there's still another date day tomorrow!"

"Please boldly express your feelings and send out your sincere love letter! Once the AO pairing is successful, you can unlock a sweet 1V1 date!"

It was another one-on-one date day... Yan Quan had no choice in the matter both times. Yan Quan felt like she was developing a psychological aversion to the word "date."

With his elbows propped on the table, Yan Quan hastily wrote down the letter he was going to send to Fu Duannian.

"As you wish." — Yan Quan

After delivering the mail to Fu Duannian's mailbox, Yan Quan stood there in the open air for a long time, lost in thought.

I looked up at the sky: the sun was about to set, and night was about to rise...

"Yan Quan." Ji Yao also came to deliver a letter at this moment. Seeing Yan Quan standing there in a daze, she shouted, "Don't choose him!"

Seeing that Yan Quan had already sent the letter, Ji Yao gritted her teeth and muttered, "Damn it, I'm too late... that bastard Fu Duan Nian!"

"Fine, fine... Is this how you play it?" Ji Yao raised her eyebrows angrily, and in a fit of rage tore the letter she had just written to shreds.

Yan Quan saw the signature on the fallen scraps of paper: "Fu Duan Nian." Was Ji Yao originally going to write a letter to Fu Duan Nian?

Yan Quan was a little puzzled.

But something even more unexpected happened—Ji Yao turned around gracefully and took out a new blank letter.

With a swift, erratic stroke, he wrote several large, illegible characters in just a few seconds: "Avengers Alliance"—Ji Yao.

Then... Yan Quan watched as Ji Yao strode with her long legs to the very end of the Alpha mailbox line—Yan Ceyan's mailbox.

"Thud—" Ji Yao pressed the envelope down hard with his fingers and stuffed it in, gritting his teeth as if venting his anger.

Yan Quan was shocked.

Not only was Yan Quan shocked, but the viewers in the live chat were also in an uproar.

"No way?! Yan Quan voted for Professor Fu, and Ji Yao voted for her ex-husband? What kind of insane matching system is this?"

Okay, okay, you've turned a dating reality show into a multinomial distribution, haven't you?

"Wait, Ji Yao was cursing her ex-husband this morning, and she's already siding with him tonight? How fickle!"

Am I the only one who noticed that Ji Yao's letter was titled "The Avengers"? It doesn't seem like she has feelings for her ex-husband.

[Any Ji Yao fans out there who can explain their idol's behavior to me? He's completely jumping between different shipper pairings like a joker.]

[Um...a rather insane mental state. I'm a Ji Yao fan, and honestly, I don't understand either.]

[You guys are obviously just regular members. We're the kind of people who pay to see exclusive bonus content; we just have an extra piece of memory compared to you.]

This morning, after Yan Quan and his friend left, everyone in the Love Variety House played a lottery game, and Ji Yao won a "Dating Assistance Card" provided by the program sponsor.

This card allows Ji Yao to go on a date with someone regardless of their willingness, provided that the other person hasn't successfully chosen someone else.

[Ji Yao must be hating Yan Quan and Fu Duan Nian for having already chosen each other, so she wants to form a revenge alliance with her ex-husband to ruin their date!]

What the heck... a dating reality show is going to be this exciting?

What about her ex-husband? Did he agree? What if he chose someone else instead?

Um... to be honest, subconsciously I always felt that my ex-husband wouldn't choose anyone else but Yan Quan...

[Add one, although my ex-husband is stubborn, his actions betray him – he only chooses Yan Quan.]

[I noticed that every time I followed my ex-husband's gaze, I found him staring at Yan Quan without exception.]

[Damn, this is voyeurism, so exciting!]

As expected, the comments section was right, because Yan Ceyan did not appear on the open lawn until the very last moment before the confession letter submission channel closed.

In the dead of night, amidst restless hearts and hidden agendas, the mechanical AI voice once again rang out in the Love House. This time, it carried a cold and somber warning.

"Because Yan Ceyan violated the rules of dating in the cabin by failing to send his love letter in time, his behavior has been judged as passively participating in the recording, and he will be punished by being put in solitary confinement for eight hours tonight."

"The Love House is a place where everyone spends time together and searches for true love. I hope everyone can learn from this experience and take the first step to confess their feelings bravely, so as not to have any regrets!"

As the broadcast message was read, the number of comments on the live stream surged.

[And here's something even more unexpected... Why didn't the ex-husband choose Yan Quan?]

[Uh... he didn't choose Yan Quan, he didn't even choose any other Omega (puzzling)]

I'm genuinely confused. Who would choose to stay in a dark, locked-up cell instead of sleeping?

The solitary confinement room set up by the production team...tsk tsk, just thinking about it makes me shudder.

In that case, Ji Yao's privilege card will be activated. Tomorrow's date is Yan Quan x Professor Fu, and Ji Yao x her ex-husband.

This configuration... is quite dramatic.

[One group goes on a date, the other ruins it... Where did the production team find such a group of amazing people who are always causing trouble?]

...

"Click—" The heavy latch fell, and the last gap swallowed all the light from the outside world. Yan Ceyan was left with only darkness.

The real terror of solitary confinement lies in the absolute silence.

When external sounds are completely shut out, the whispers within the body that were previously ignored begin to amplify infinitely: the muffled sound of blood rushing through the ear canals, the heartbeat, even the subtle peristalsis of the intestines become so clear that it sends chills down your spine...

This "stripping" of perception is a destruction of the "social nature" etched into human genes.

Even though Yan Ceyan had received corresponding sensory deprivation training in the army, his nerves still involuntarily tensed up.

If Yan Quan were imprisoned here...

Yan Ceyan dared not think about it anymore.

Then he lowered his head and gently pinched his knuckles, stimulating the pain to keep himself alert to the outside world.

In the empty silence, the faint sound of water began to emerge: "Drip-drip-drip-drip-drip."

Their descent frequency is irregular, as if it were simply designed for "torture and interference," like long fingernails scratching across a blackboard...

Ha... Even though his brain was involuntarily affected and his senses became confused, Yan Ceyan still let out a low chuckle from his throat:

fortunately……

Fortunately, Yan Quan scored full marks in the quiz segment where he first revealed his identity. Otherwise, if he had been locked up in this awful place...

The sweet oranges are about to rot and wither.

In a daze, Yan Ceyan recalled the conversation Ji Yao had with him privately before he entered the solitary confinement room.

"Damn it, Fu Duannian, that dark, bastard! He's a fucking psychopath who should die..."

That usually aggressive, long-haired omega with black hair started by cursing Fu Duannian for a full five minutes straight. He didn't repeat a single swear word.

Later, Yan Ceyan couldn't stand it anymore and interrupted, "Is this what you meant by talking to me about Yan Quan?"

"Yeah, damn it... so that Fu, that bastard..." Ji Yao's black manicure was almost shoved into half a skull by him, and finally, in a fit of rage, he said:

"I don't know the specifics. But... that guy is pretty sure Yan Quan will choose him for this date."

"That smiling face, who knows what wicked thoughts he's hiding behind it. And... lately he's been acting suspiciously and mysteriously, I don't know what methods he used to force Yan Quan to choose him."

“Damn it…” At this point, Ji Yao launched into another classic Chinese curse, “Did he even give him face? He’s like a leech sticking to Yan Quan, has Yan Quan ever given him a kind look?”

Yan Ceyan actually wanted to say that this passage was more suitable to describe Ji Yao himself.

"Damn it, as if anyone doesn't have their own tricks up their sleeve?" Ji Yao's tone was a mix of annoyance and smugness. "If I, as the investor, pull some strings behind the scenes, he'll be locked up with me tomorrow."

"Compared to Fu** and Yan Quan's date, it's not as good as you and Yan Quan. At least you're a normal person."

...

Ji Yao's intervention came too late; Yan Quan and Fu Duan Nian had already reached a "mutual selection" agreement, making tomorrow's date unpredictable once again.

"Forced..." In the cramped and confined space, Yan Ceyan stared at the oppressive darkness around him, lost in thought...

After a long period of contemplation, Yan Ceyan dug his nails deep into his flesh, and in his dark, deep eyes, only the pupils were slightly gleaming—so that's what it is.

-----------------------

Author's Note: There are quite a few gaps between chapters. Regarding the Baisha Street slum community and Fu Duan's first meeting with Yan Quan (some readers may be a little unfamiliar with this), please refer to the previous chapter: Chapter 16 "Yan Quan's Past, Rusty and Traceful".