Chapter 73 Chapter 73 Is it you?

Xu Qing'an was a little surprised by Shangguan Xu's invitation.

He should have remembered the date correctly, how could she...

Yes, it was obvious that she had rejected him on the grounds of inconvenience when he said that at first, so why was she asking him to go to Lizheng Hall now?

Xu Qing'an pushed open the palace door and walked in alone. As soon as he entered the palace, he was filled with the rich fragrance of peony flowers.

It was just as he smelled it usually, strong but not stuffy, and there was still a refreshing feeling in his heart.

After entering the hall, Xu Qing'an looked around as usual to find Shangguan Xu.

However, she was not in the front hall.

He walked to the side room and pushed the door, but saw that the incense and scroll inside were not lit or opened, and there was no one in sight.

He turned around and looked at the back hall, the only place he had not yet checked.

That was a place he had never set foot in as Xu Qing'an.

He walked forward slowly, lifted the curtain, and looked inside. A familiar bed came into view, and a girl with long hair and simple clothes was half lying on it.

Shangguan Xu opened his eyes when he heard the sound of the curtain being lifted.

The man was wearing a cloud-green robe and strolled out from the clusters of peony flowers. His eyes also fell on her.

Step by step, getting closer and closer.

Shangguan Xu rested his forearms on the couch and propped himself up slightly.

The corners of her lips curved up and she smiled at him.

Xu Qing'an spoke first: "Your Majesty, why don't you cover yourself with the quilt when you rest? Aren't you worried about catching a cold?"

Shangguan Xu didn't pay much attention to his words: "The weather these days is not so bad that you will catch a cold if you don't cover yourself with a blanket."

Xu Qing'an's eyes were soft and gentle: "But isn't it inconvenient for Your Majesty?"

"Hmm?" Shangguan Xu tilted his head, seemingly unable to understand the meaning of his words.

Xu Qing'an then asked, "Didn't the Queen just say that she had her period?"

"Did I say that?" Shangguan Xu asked him, but then replied, "I should have said that it was inconvenient for me, right?"

As she spoke, her warm eyes, which seemed to contain the fragrance of peony flowers, looked into his eyes softly and brightly.

He looked at her quietly for a moment.

He said, "Yes, that's exactly what the Queen said."

"Then why do you think it's my period?"

Xu Qing'an lowered his eyes.

Then, he suddenly smiled, took a few steps towards the bed, and sat down next to her without any hesitation.

He took her hand, gently rubbing the back of it with his thumb. "Please do not blame me after I answer your question." He looked up at her, his peach blossom eyes full of affection and smile. "I also had a childhood sweetheart, so I understand a little bit about women's situations that are difficult to express. Most of the discomforts and inconveniences are related to their monthly menstruation. And as it happens, I just expressed my desire to be close to you today, so it is not convenient for you to refuse me. I think I understand your intention now."

Shangguan Xu raised his eyes slightly and kept smiling while he spoke.

"You're right. I thought you were too ignorant."

"Your Majesty, what you said really makes me blush. It's not like you and I haven't..."

He changed the action of rubbing her hand to stroking it.

Shangguan Xu smiled knowingly, put down his arms, turned sideways and lay relaxedly on the soft pillow.

She closed her eyes and said, "I did have my period today."

"Then why did Your Majesty let me come..."

"Can't I ask you to come accompany me?"

Xu Qing paused for a moment, a trace of indescribable discomfort flashing through his heart, but the next moment he said sincerely: "Of course."

When he saw her closing her eyes, he knew that her period had affected her mental state, so he moved and sat a little lower beside her pillow, then put his arm around her shoulders and let her lie on his lap.

His fingers rested on her forehead.

Shangguan Xu felt comfortable under his massage and said lazily, "I've had my period these past few days and haven't felt well. I just asked Doctor Xun to come and see me, and we talked about you, so I thought I'd ask you to come and keep me company."

Xu Qing'an frowned: "Your Majesty, will you feel uncomfortable during your period?"

Shangguan Xu opened his eyes and looked at him, and couldn't help but smile: "You ask that question. After all, this is a special day. My body can't be like any other day, completely unresponsive."

"Will that hurt?"

"Yes, in the past two years." Shangguan Xu closed his eyes again and said lightly, "That's why I asked Doctor Xun to help me with my diagnosis."

Xu Qing'an opened his mouth, about to ask a few more questions, but Shangguan Xu spoke first, "Okay, I was going to talk about you, why are you talking about me again?"

Xu Qing'an changed his tone and said, "What does your Majesty want to say to me?"

Shangguan Xu said, "I was chatting with Doctor Xun today about your past. He said you both loved to joke around. He especially remembered that when you first met him, you often wrote him letters, always jokingly asking him about treatments or recuperation methods for various illnesses."

Xu Qing'an stopped rubbing his forehead and said, "He must be wrong. I have never written to him to ask for prescriptions for treatment or recuperation."

Shangguan Xu looked at him and asked doubtfully, "Did he say something wrong?"

Xu Qing'an replied affirmatively, "Of course. I was weak when I was young, and his master always took care of me. During that time, I drank countless medicinal herbs. I couldn't even avoid them, so why would I go out of my way to learn a prescription? Besides, his master's medical skills are far superior to mine. With his master by his side, if I really had any questions, why wouldn't I just ask him directly? Wouldn't that be faster than writing to him?"

Shangguan Xu smiled helplessly: "You're right, maybe I talked to him too much today, so I remembered it wrongly."

Xu Qing'an's hands began to massage again, and she could feel his voice falling from above her: "I think it's your period that's affecting your majesty. You might as well get some rest early."

"What about you?"

"Since Your Majesty has summoned me, I must naturally stay by your side."

She breathed a sigh of relief as he rubbed her, "It feels so good. Yanrong, let me discuss something with you."

"Um?"

"Official rank and treasure—I believe you'll gain a great deal in the future. However, they are ultimately rewards from the court, so I've been thinking about what I can give you. But as I said before, you won't be short of treasure either, so there's not much point in me expending my attention on those things. After much thought, I realize that life is about finding a place to rest, and after death, we also need a place to rest. So, I've chosen a place for you, nestled between mountains and water—a perfect place for a final resting place a hundred years from now."

Noticing that the movement on her forehead had stopped again, Shangguan Xu opened her eyes and looked up at the person above. She raised her hand to cover his wrist and asked him gently, "What's wrong? Don't you like it?"

As Shangguan Xu said, nowadays, no matter whether they are people of status or ordinary people, they all care about whether the feng shui of their resting place after death is good. Looking at the dynasties throughout history, those who were favored by the emperor were often granted a feng shui treasure land as their resting place at an early stage.

There was nothing wrong with the form of Shangguan Xu's ceremony, and it was even a great honor for court officials.

But he lowered his eyes and asked, "What about the queen? The queen has chosen a piece of land for me, but where has she chosen for me?"

She smiled and said nonchalantly, "Why should I look any further? It must be in Pingling."

Xu Qing'an's eyes fixed, and he understood the implication of her words - she was the empress dowager, the queen of Emperor Zhao, so after her death, she would naturally be buried in Pingling with Emperor Zhao.

Xu Qing'an suddenly felt a lump of air building up in his chest, heavy and stuffy, but he couldn't get rid of it.

She reached up and placed her hand on his cheek, caressing it gently. She said soothingly, "Yanrong, let's cherish the present time. I won't be able to accompany you anymore after I die."

"It's funny, sometimes I really think we're a good match. We both met someone we loved when we were young. You had your childhood sweetheart, and I had my beloved. But they both passed away young, leaving us with nothing but regrets. Our meeting now is our fate in this life, but we'll eventually make up for those regrets with our deceased loved ones after we die."

The hand he had placed on her forehead suddenly moved downwards, wrapping his arm around her waist. "After death, we are nothing but a handful of earth. Everything is empty and desolate. Could it be that Your Majesty also cares about those empty, self-deceiving thoughts?"

But she said it seriously: "Why are you deceiving yourself? There's an old saying, 'Sharing the same bed in life, sharing the same blood in death.' This is indeed a romantic thing. How could I not care?"

In fact, he never believed in ghosts and gods, nor did he care about rituals that were only for future generations to see. However, now he was a little dizzy because of her excitement.

Perhaps it was because he had never worried before about who those ceremonial people were who were traveling with him.

Yes, he was the emperor and she was the empress before. They were a destined couple and should be the ones to shoulder the responsibility of the world's etiquette together.

But now, the one who shared the responsibility of carrying out those rituals with her was not him. Not only that, it was also the person who once wanted to kill her, her "husband-killer" enemy.

Xu Qing'an felt more and more dizzy.

He couldn't help but raise his head to control his dizziness.

Shangguan Xu, lying in his arms, just looked at him quietly, seeing his restrained expression and the conflicted emotions that he couldn't hide.

Is that you?

If it were you, would you really have the heart to watch me die with my classmates?

But if it really is you, why don't you want to recognize me?

Shangguan Xu hadn't hesitated to ask that question for two reasons. First, the dead cannot be resurrected. She had seen his body before, and while his face was unrecognizable, many details matched. She couldn't find any evidence to convince herself. Second, even if he had survived by some unexpected means, why wouldn't he acknowledge her now that he was back? She couldn't believe he would be so cruel as to let her suffer through the past like a spectator.

She is also afraid of disappointment.

After a moment, she saw him slowly lower his head, and he looked at her with a complicated yet smiling gaze.

"Well, since this is something your Majesty cares about, then let's do as your Majesty wishes."

Shangguan Xu's expression gradually faded, and in her confused and surprised eyes with a layer of hidden pain, he slowly covered her eyes with his hands.

In the warm darkness, she felt him lean over, his breath touching her lips.

"But what you said just now is also true. Since you and I can't accompany each other after we die, let's enjoy ourselves while we are still alive."

As soon as she finished speaking, her lips were held, softly invaded, her teeth were pried open bit by bit, her breathing was heavy, her movements were extremely affectionate, and her breath lingered in her ears.

However, Shangguan Xu's mind remained blank for a long time.

She thought, how could...

And in a place where she couldn't see, Xu Qing'an took out a handkerchief from his sleeve. After a deep kiss, while she was catching her breath, he covered her eyes with one hand and wiped his nose with the handkerchief with the other hand.

He glanced at the red color remaining on the brocade handkerchief, closed his eyes and sighed silently.

Wait a little longer, until the day I can survive.