choose

Pulling away from the state of empathy with the original Zerg Queen, Alyssa felt a chill run down her spine. "This is different from what I learned about the Zerg's origins... The origins don't mention that we and humans originated from the same ancient Blue Planet, nor does it say that we initially competed with humans for territory."

The well-known origin story of the Zerg begins with humanity's relentless defeat by the xenomorphs. The Primordial Zerg Queen, leading the Zerg like a divine force, defeated the xenomorphs and flourished in the star regions they occupied. After the Primordial Zerg Queen and her husband gave birth to the first generation of Kairos, she died. The husband then gradually established a political power centered around the Primordial Zerg Queen, creating a system where she could soothe the restless Zerg and prevent their degeneration. Throughout the story, the Primordial Zerg Queen was gentle, wise, powerful, and possessed prophetic powers. With her at the core of their spiritual chain, the Zerg were unstoppable.

"It's my fault. I didn't notice Rulni's paranoia at the time. Perhaps I had a premonition of danger, but I didn't have the energy to care." The Primordial Zerg Mother said, "Rulni needs justice. A mother who eats her own children, a Zerg who made her fortune by stealing humans as an interstellar pirate, a man entrusted with the care of her children by the Primordial Zerg Mother on her deathbed, is far from being a god, a man who saves humanity from disaster, a Zerg Mother's blood father, and so on. It has to be legitimate."

"Later, when Kairos grew up and I was able to communicate with her in her spiritual world, many years had passed. Kairos had already changed many generations, Rune was dead, and the bottle of honey I left behind was nowhere to be found. The Zerg had become what it is today."

"Rulni forbade the Zerg to call the Zerg Mother 'Mother' anymore, but to address her as 'Your Majesty'. In his mind, Kairos, who could no longer give birth to Zerg other than the Zerg Mother, was unworthy of being called Mother."

"San Hobelu, in ancient Zerg language, means pistil. Rulni placed Kairos at the center of the pistil, with satellites and star chains surrounding it as layers of petals, enveloping the Palace of San Hobelu and isolating the Zerg Queen from the other Zerg. Despite his high position, Kairos has lost the ability to empathize with other Zerg."

“Alyssa, do you really want to be this insect queen?”

The Primordial Worm Mother asked this unexpectedly. Alyssa raised her head from the Primordial Worm Mother's soft abdomen and looked at her. Her black and shiny compound eyes were composed of thousands of small eyes, and each eye reflected a confused look of her.

"Every time a Kairos comes to me, I ask them this question. But unfortunately, they were born as Zergmies, the most important part of the system built by Rune, and they never considered the option of not being a Zergmies. Of course, Rune also deprived them of this choice."

"But your childhood experiences were completely different from theirs. If the Zerg hadn't rescued you, you might have lived a different life in the human world."

"The Zerg Queen may seem noble, but she's constantly bound by the responsibility of comforting the Zerg. Your glandular problem could be a major event that shakes the very foundations of the Zerg. You wouldn't dare acknowledge your lover in front of the entire Zerg race. Your lover would have to abandon their own kin and sisters to serve you for life. Your every move affects the very foundation of the Zerg nation, so you can't make a single mistake. You can't experience the joy of raising a child because your child will die at birth."

"These are the prices you pay for becoming a Zerg Queen. After experiencing life outside the Zerg, are you still willing to do so?"

Alyssa trembled all over. The Primordial Zerg Mother's words were a tortured question to her soul. The Primordial Zerg Mother saw through her superficial strength. After losing contact with Seville and suffering from nightmares every night, she often questioned herself: If Seville hadn't been looking for a cure for her glandular disease, he wouldn't have traveled to that dangerous and unfamiliar human star region; if Seville hadn't wanted to be a prince worthy of her, recognized by all Zerg, he would still be his leisurely noble young master. She was like a delicate and beautiful flower growing on a cliff. Even if she fell in love with a butterfly halfway up the mountain, she couldn't condescend to let the butterfly pick her up. She had to let the butterfly brave the wind and frost and fly up to her.

It didn't have to be this way. She found it hard to describe to the other bugs the sense of security that surged through her when she saw the humanoid Seville smiling gently at her in that cramped maneuvering cabin. Her heart was beating wildly and passionately then, and she'd thought it was the panic of being unaccustomed to Gabriel and Vio's mimicry. But now, thinking about it, how could it not be a destined attraction?

But the bottle of honey condensed from the original insect mother, the honey that can recreate the insect mother, is gone. Does she have any other choice?

"I……"

Alyssa lowered her head and looked at her hands.

Unconsciously, her hand had sunk deep into the Primordial Worm Mother's abdomen. The skin, thriving from countless births, bulged like a ripe, rotten persimmon, leaking out from between Alyssa's fingers. She raised her hand, and the Primordial Worm Mother's abdomen bore distinct marks of her five fingers. The skin where her handprint had been pressed was noticeably darker than the surrounding area, and its rebound was a beat slower.

"A bit scary, isn't it?" The Primordial Worm Queen turned her upper body toward Alyssa, her massive head lowered. Her glistening black compound eyes turned a brilliant gold and splintered into countless tiny facets. Each facet reflected Alyssa's shadow from every angle.

A pair of perfect, golden Zerg compound eyes that can hunt with mental power in all directions without blind spots.

"Look at me, Alyssa. I have almost all the racial characteristics of the Zerg. These are the children I ate."

"Seeing the children's features growing from me, do you know how much I loathe myself? Yet, those children enthusiastically consider it a supreme honor to have their race's features growing from me. They're proud to be my nourishment. How can reincarnation be achieved within my belly? Death is death, and even if a new egg is laid, it's not the same child as before."

"But I still have to eat, because if I don't, we won't be able to leave the Ancient Blue Star."

“Alyssa, what about you?”

The Primordial Worm Mother's aura was so overwhelming that Alyssa's eyes had turned golden before she knew it. She fearfully tried to retract her mental tentacles, but they seemed to be stuck to something.

The Primordial Worm Mother's spirit reached her through her tentacles, forcing Alyssa to confront the inner struggles of a mother in the savage past. The overwhelming pain, like a tangible force, brought Alyssa to her knees. She gasped for air, as if drowning in the Primordial Worm Mother's hidden tears.

"Alyssa, in terms of kindness and ability, you are more than capable of fulfilling the responsibilities of a Zerg Queen. However, in your position as a Zerg Queen, you may face this dilemma. When the interests of a small group of Zerg conflict with those of the entire Zerg race, how do you choose? You might say, choose the interests of the majority. But what if that small group of Zerg are your most cherished relatives, children, or loved ones?"

"A Worm Mother must have the courage to make choices and the fortitude to shoulder the responsibility for them. This is the final lesson I want to teach you about Worm Mothers."

Alyssa burst into tears, unable to bear the pain the original Zerg Queen had endured alone for tens of thousands of years. The original Zerg Queen had dedicated everything she had to the Zerg, and to conserve energy, she hadn't even evolved a mimicry that would protect her from the sin of cannibalism.

The original Zerg Mother's meaning was clear. A Zerg Mother's spiritual anchor should be the entire Zerg race, not Seville alone. She had no right to be overly saddened by the King's husband.

She thought of her mother, Aimi, who no longer wanted to be a Zerg Queen after witnessing her husband, Wolf, being devoured by the alien species. However, she still tried her best to leave a glimmer of hope for the Zerg and gave birth to the next Zerg Queen.

When something happened to Sevier, she had no right to grieve for him. They were not a pair, and the Worm Queen could not end her feelings for Sevier because of her.

Her panic reached its peak at this moment. The nightmares she had had seemed to be confirmed by the mouth of the Primordial Worm Mother: "Is it, is it that Seville has already...?"

"No, my child, no." The Primordial Worm Mother said with some reluctance, "I don't have the ability to predict the future as described in those textbooks that mention me. Otherwise, I wouldn't have handed the honey to Rune."

"I hope you'll be mentally prepared for any situation. Become a true Worm Queen, not just play the role of one. Every choice you make has a price. The higher you stand, the greater the price you pay."

Alyssa slumped to the ground, her head hanging weakly. The Primordial Worm Mother sensed the chaotic thoughts in Alyssa's mind and sighed, "If you truly cannot or do not want to endure this, then bring the Primordial Honey to the underground palace. I will try to use the spiritual power accumulated over tens of thousands of years to purify the Primordial Honey and see if I can create another Worm Mother."

Alyssa suddenly looked up at the original insect mother: "Purify the primordial honey? Recreate the insect mother? Is it possible?"

"I don't know, I've never done that."

"Then... how long will it take? What will happen to the Zerg if it fails?"

"I don't know. But, when you choose not to be a worm queen, these are not your concerns."

The Primordial Worm Queen left Alyssa's spiritual world. Alyssa found her kneeling beneath the meteorite stone, her spiritual tentacles grazing on the stone.

This conversation with the Primordial Worm Queen in her spiritual world took too much energy from Alyssa, and she fell asleep leaning against the meteorite stone.

Miraculously, she dreamed of the Four Arts Hall again, and of a different path her life would take. She hadn't been rescued by the Zerg, and had successfully become the head horse, the third concubine in the Grand Canal Governor's harem. She no longer had to make difficult choices; even her food and monthly allowance were decided by the mistress. Her greatest freedom lay in the color of her clothes and the style of her hairpin to greet the Grand Canal Governor.

After Alyssa woke up, she was in a daze for a while before she understood the situation. For the first time, she was not so graceful, lying on the ground in a big posture, thinking about the dream she had just had. As she thought about it, she suddenly laughed.

She placed her mental power on the meteorite stone again, and the original insect mother appeared in her mental world again.

"Mother." Alyssa addressed her with the respectful title all Zerg used to refer to the Primordial Zerg Mother. "I understand what you mean. I won't be panicked or confused anymore."

"I want to be a worm mother. I am a worm mother."

"My gradual escape from that situation is a miracle in itself. Whether it's the Zerg around me like Gabriel and Sewell, the Zerg watching my live stream, or even you, everything you do is to uphold my true self as the Zerg Supreme. Why shouldn't I be responsible for my own choices?"

"If any choice is a dilemma, then I will try my best to make both options perfect."

"This is what I, as a worm mother, must do."