Chapter 233 Epilogue - The New World Arc (Part 30)

What is the truth?

When the memories in one's mind completely contradict the evidence of reality, one inevitably needs an explanation in order to find a foothold to continue living with a clear conscience.

So, is it that I'm crazy, or is the world crazy?

Faced with a choice between the mental hospital and the intensive care unit, Yu Qingzhou chose the latter.

He confessed to crimes he didn't remember, hoping it would all end quickly.

Stop the headache, stop thinking, stop the fruitless questioning... Otherwise, if she continued to dig deeper, Yu Qingzhou feared that one day, even her breathing would become suspicious.

Just as the boy had hoped, things progressed smoothly to the expected result.

After a brief adjustment period of a few days, Yu Qingzhou returned to her daily routine.

He no longer recalled what happened in Nancun, and no longer questioned his own memory.

Without those incessant questions and inquiries, Yu Qingzhou could retain the version she had always believed in.

What is the truth?

In most cases, it's just something you're willing to believe is true.

—If you believe it, it is true.

Like gods, ghosts, aliens... or perhaps, Yu Rou once loved her child like an ordinary mother, such a trivial thing.

Life in the ward was very regular, with regular meals, sleep, work, and study, and was even healthier than my previous life outside.

Here, the boy no longer needs to guard against sudden rumors or strange looks from others, nor does he need to look back at that… seemingly peaceful and harmonious, but actually like an apple rotting from the inside, faintly exuding a putrid aura of corruption.

Even bullying and exclusion are not without precedent.

Those guys disliked him, but more so because they disliked certain traits he exhibited as E025.

Regardless of his memories and history before becoming E025, they knew nothing about the boy's background.

They couldn't touch Yu Qingzhou's true fears deep inside, so all the hurt they caused seemed superficial and insignificant.

Aren't you angry... even after being treated like that?

Hearing Shen Yingxue ask a question softly, Yu Qingzhou was momentarily dazed.

For a moment, I was a little taken aback, wondering what exactly the other party meant by treating me that way.

She simply gazed back at those emerald eyes hidden beneath long eyelashes, unconsciously repeating the last few words of the question.

That kind of treatment—

Yeah, isn't that incredibly unfair?

Her turquoise eyes narrowed slightly, and the way she looked down at him resembled the merciful compassion of the Virgin Mary.

The scene looked strangely familiar for some reason... was it what they call déjà vu?

—No, upon closer reflection, I have actually seen it before.

That day, lying on the cold floor of the dormitory, the boy barely opened his eyes, which were stung by the light and brought tears to his eyes, and this was the scene he saw.

For a fleeting moment, E027's face flashed before Yu Qingzhou's eyes.

At that time, he was cornered by E027 and pinned firmly against the wall.

The overhead light shone obliquely from behind the other person, just like that... bright, white, cold, dazzling, like excessively bright moonlight.

It's so mesmerizing that you can't help but close your eyes.

A soft laugh suddenly came from the darkness.

(—Do you know what it means to close your eyes in front of others with such an innocent look on your face?)

[Those people who have been in your life: your family, neighbors, classmates, teachers, investigators, the enthusiastic audience members who voted to send you here, and everyone you meet here...]

(Ah, it seems they know nothing about it. But that's okay, because I'm here...)

Those who supported you, those who opposed you, those who claimed they wanted to help you—did they truly care about you, or even try to understand what you were really thinking?

(We are all the same, lost and helpless, in this world full of absurdity and the unknown. Because of the doubt and unease that we can never shake off, we have no interest in anything. No matter how hard we try to pretend, we are destined to be unable to fit in and live as comfortably as others.)

--is that so?

Yu Qingzhou questioned himself in the darkness and finally had to admit that it seemed to be true.

Memories and reality intertwined in his mind. The melodious voice of a young boy and the slightly hoarse voice of a woman blended together in a fleeting moment.

Even so...

(So ​​this is what we are like—)

【Why……】

(Why can't we just stick together and support each other?)

A murmur tinged with laughter was swallowed between the lips in an instant.

An incredibly gentle kiss.

With a tight embrace that seemed to embed the boy into his very bones, E027 rested his head on his forehead.

A smooth, slightly cool sensation came from where our skin met.

You can faintly smell a unique sweet aroma of candy with your breath—transparent, blocky fruit hard candy that makes an unusually crisp sound when it breaks between your teeth.

E027 maintained her smile, her curved eyes holding a deep night sky, dark yet faintly shimmering with starlight.

Upon closer inspection, it became clear that it was merely a reflection of Yu Qingzhou herself.

He is being watched.

Realizing this, Yu Qingzhou instinctively wanted to look away, but then she heard E027's casual voice.

[Are you so afraid to admit that you don't actually dislike this feeling, and in fact... you don't dislike me as much as you imagine?]

[...]

It's okay, I'll wait patiently. One day you'll understand that compared to those so-called good people, or those who claim to care about you, the two of us, you and I, are the true kindred spirits...

E027 slowly uttered words that sounded like a vow, his gaze lingering between the boy's face and neck.

Yu Qingzhou caught a glimpse of the sharp canine teeth peeking out from between the other's crimson lips. They were white and cold, inexplicably reminiscent of some carnivorous feline. The suffocating feeling coming from her neck was like being coiled by a snake...

From that day on, Yu Qingzhou fell into increasingly severe insomnia.

This is one of the reasons why the boy would suddenly faint in broad daylight; he was simply too tired.

Yu Qingzhou still harbored resentment towards what E027 had said at the time.

He felt even more resentful that he hadn't been able to express his disgust and resistance to E027's behavior in the first place.

Why couldn't I throw a punch back like I did the first time?

Because it's within the surveillance range of the electronic eye?

Because it happened so suddenly that I didn't have time to react?

Or is it because...

Just like E027 said, she didn't actually dislike the other person that much at all...

That day, Yu Qingzhou only discovered the candy in her pocket when she returned to her dormitory.

It was probably E027 who secretly slipped it into his pocket during the hug.

Yu Qingzhou does not like sweets, especially sugar.

But looking at the fruit candy wrapped in cellophane and smelling the sweetness that was so similar to that of E027, Yu Qingzhou inexplicably peeled off the candy wrapper.

The hard fruit candy melts slowly between your teeth, spreading a surprisingly realistic pear flavor.

It wasn't as sweet as I had imagined.

It even has a slightly pleasant smell.

Perhaps, no matter how artificial the flavoring is, it's still better than a banana, apple, or other fruit that's already overripe, rotten, and infested with maggots.

Which one is the true taste of fruit? Perhaps none of them are, or perhaps all of them are.

Ultimately, it all comes down to which version of truth the judge prefers.

One can deny everything one doubts, but one must build one's own truth upon it... Otherwise, the act of denial itself will become meaningless.

It's even absurd and ridiculous.

Therefore, when he answered Shen Yingxue's question, the boy's heart had already begun to waver to some extent.

However, at that time, Yu Qingzhou herself was not fully aware of it.

Since it was your own choice, you should have considered all the possible consequences when making that choice, including whether the consequences were within your ability to bear them.

Yu Qingzhou raised her head and looked at the hazy figure shrouded in white light.

He paused, then added: "Besides, whether those people care or not is unimportant to me, because I, too, don't care about their inner thoughts or feelings."