45 My uncle is dying

◎Huo Yan: I’ll stab you to death! I’ll make you mad to death.◎

The day after Huo Yan returned home, Emperor Wu of Han received the decree allowing the twins to enter the palace.

Wei Qing and the twins were favored, so it was common for them to enter the palace. The big fanfare this time was just because Liu Che was afraid that Huo Yan would not come.

He had just gotten something good and couldn't wait to show it off to his beloved ministers and sons.

Huo Yan skillfully stuffed a purse into the eunuch announcing the decree, as if he'd done it so many times before. He looked even more like a man of official descent than Wei Qing, who had stood up after receiving the decree.

In fact, as long as he didn't get stubborn, he was always tactful. He understood the principle that big devils are easy to fight, but small devils are difficult to deal with. This small lotus package wouldn't be worth much, but it would establish a good relationship with the people in front of the emperor and make him familiar, which would definitely have some benefits.

Eunuchs were always despised by the court. For example, even the nobles wouldn't pay them any money; if they said anything more, they'd be called a lowly slave. Some nobles also treated these people with disdain.

Among these people, the Wei Mansion is like a breath of fresh air. Lord Wei Qing always treats them with a good attitude, and occasionally, if he is not too busy, he can even come and have a glass of wine.

This young Master Huo was quite a charming man, always sympathetic to the needs of others and generous with his wealth, always keeping a purse ready for them. Consequently, whenever there was an imperial decree for them, the eunuchs in the Weiyang Palace would scramble to get their hands on it. This eunuch was also lucky today, as Huo Yan had just returned, and Huo Yan's purse was even thicker than usual.

The people around Liu Che are all smart people. The Wei Mansion has a large family and the masters in the mansion have even better tempers. They dare not offend them easily, and there is no way to offend them.

But the eunuch who came to announce the decree shook his head, picked up the purse with both hands and returned it.

Huo Yan didn't understand.

The eunuch was not very old, only about twenty-one or twenty-two years old, with fair skin, but his eyes suddenly turned red. After a long time, he kowtowed heavily to Huo Yan and Huo Qubing, and took out a bulging purse from his arms.

"I was born into a poor family and entered the palace at an early age. My parents gradually passed away, leaving my eldest sister to manage the household alone. A few years ago, my eldest sister's little daughter was tragically lost. My brother-in-law also passed away many years ago, leaving my eldest sister with only one daughter. My eldest sister loved her more than her life. Since the child went missing, my eldest sister has been in tears all day long. I am a humble person and cannot easily leave the palace, so I can only worry. Unexpectedly, one day the child suddenly returned home. I made many inquiries and learned that my nephew was fortunately saved by two young men who risked their lives that day. I am deeply grateful. I came here today to thank you, how could I ask for a reward from you? This is my own treasure that I have kept for many years, and I am giving it to you to thank you for saving my sister's life."

After he finished speaking, he kowtowed.

Huo Yan had never imagined that his righteous act would lead to such consequences. He refused the purse and put on a serious expression. "The human trafficker deserves death. I just did what I had to do. No need to thank me."

Huo Qubing nodded beside him and said, "No need to thank me."

"Eunuch, would you like to stay and have a drink?"

Wei Qing watched them explain the events of the past to the eunuch in a serious manner, chuckled, straightened his back, and asked questions naturally, as if he was greeting a guest who had brought gifts.

"Your Excellency is too polite. I cannot drink any more water or wine. Your Majesty is anxiously waiting for the doctor and the two young masters." The eunuch wiped his tears, waved his hand, paused, and then said, "This is not a bad thing, it is a great blessing."

Wei Qing smiled and motioned him to lead the way.

Huo Yan also took a step forward and followed Wei Qing side by side with Huo Qubing. Along the way to Weiyang Palace, they greeted the familiar palace people they met with a smile.

"Sisters, I'm back. See you at the usual place later!"

The palace was always strict, and the palace maids spent long periods of time in the inner palace, their days filled with boredom. Huo Yan saw a small business opportunity, and whenever he visited the palace, he would bring a few newly released pearls and toys to resell. Sometimes, he would even give small lists from the toy house to palace maids who were struggling. As a result, he became very popular within the inner palace.

In the year since he left, the palace has become stagnant again, and the palace people missed him terribly. To be frank, even if Liu Che died one day, he would not be missed by so many palace people.

The palace maids were walking along the palace path. When they saw Huo Yan, their eyes lit up. Although they quickly lowered their heads, their joyful expressions could not be deceived.

It turned out that Mr. Huo had returned.

The aunt in charge in front of them, who had originally had a serious expression on her face, couldn't help but smile when she saw Huo Yan, who often delivered messages to their families. Several little palace maids who followed behind and got along well with Huo Yan even winked at Huo Yan at the end of the palace road. Huo Yan gave them an assuring look, and the little palace maids lowered their heads and smiled unconsciously.

It’s great that Mr. Huo has brought some fun things over again.

Wei Qing, who was standing in front, knew without even looking that Huo Yan was making faces, so he raised his eyebrows and chuckled.

Huo Qubing also laughed.

It’s great that A Yan is back.

[Actually, Yanzi is the Han succubus, right? Look how fascinated he is.]

[But Ah Yan does like to spend money.]

[Remember, rob the rich and give to the poor, hhh.]

[Son, if you still have money left over from that newspaper I mentioned last time, go ahead and get it.]

[Ayan still wants to open a clinic.]

[Ayan: Let’s spread the newspaper again.]

[It’s okay, it’s just a small amount of money. Ah Yan will sell the elixir of immortality next time!]

[Next time I’ll sell you the immortality powder. hhh.]

[Last time it was immortality, next time it will be the return of the soul.]

[Give them a clear arrangement.]

…

Huo Yan returned to his loyal Han Palace, feeling refreshed.

When his good uncle saw him, he kept barking and didn't let him go until he was blushing.

"Everyone, find a place to sit. I've got something good to show you." Liu Che called out to the three of them, then mysteriously opened the lacquer box in front of him and showed them the four pitch-black pills. "It's said these pills are from immortals. Taking one will allow you to ascend to heaven in broad daylight. They're precious. There are only ten pills in total. I worked hard to get these four. I've specially prepared one for you three. Come, share it, and let's achieve immortality together!"

Wei Qing and Huo Qubing were both very curious and stepped forward to take one each.

Liu Che took a bite first, and Wei Qing and Huo Qubing didn't think much about it and prepared to follow suit.

After all, there's nothing wrong with following His Majesty/Uncle.

The large-scale pill-smuggling scene in Weiyang Palace made Huo Yan's forehead, which had finally managed to keep its face from blushing, bounce with joy. He took two quick steps and rushed forward to grab Huo Qubing's pill. Huo Qubing had no interest in immortality and actually thought that the pill in his uncle's hand must be fake, so he quickly let it go. Huo Yan then went to grab the pill from Wei Qing. Wei Qing, like Huo Qubing, also let go and gave Huo Yan a warning.

"You've never seen a pill before, so don't be too greedy. Eat less. This pill looks very bitter. You won't feel like eating after you finish it."

Huo Qubing also nodded seriously.

Every time my uncle brought me medicine, it was very bitter and unpalatable.

Liu Che laughed and scolded them for not knowing the value of the pill, and swallowed the pill whole.

"Ayan, I'll eat with you."

When Huo Yan saw him like this, his already bad expression instantly turned ferocious.

"Eat, eat, eat! All you do every day is eat! What immortality? This thing has a slow poison. Eat, eat, eat, damn it, if you eat to death, you will be immortal! Immortality, screw immortality, just wait for death!"

He almost shouted this at Liu Che.

Liu Che knew that Huo Yan was a disciple of Chunyu Tiying, a great doctor of her generation. Could it be that the pill he just took was really a poisonous pill?

Wei Qing rushed out to find the imperial physician.

Huo Qubing's expression remained calm, and he subconsciously echoed Huo Yan's words, "Then my uncle is going to die!"

Then he reacted quickly, his eyes widened, and he immediately ran to Liu Che's side with tears in his eyes, "Uncle can't die! My sisters can't be without my uncle!"

The palace servants were in complete chaos.

Liu Che's face changed drastically, and he just wanted to vomit out the medicine. Unfortunately, the pill melted in his mouth. After two dry heaves, he was completely helpless. He also felt pain all over his body, which he thought was probably because the medicine had taken effect.

He hastily passed over this absurd life, then fell behind the table, folded his hands, and waited for death calmly. He slowly told his two eldest sons about his funeral arrangements, and a tear oozed from the corner of his eye.

"I don't have a son, so my position will probably pass to those treacherous ministers." He looked hopeless and dejected as he approached death. "I'm not worried about you two or your uncle. You're all capable and will be fine without me. I'm only worried about my daughters. After I die, they'll be left alone. Qubing, you and Ayan must promise me that no matter what, you'll protect your sisters."

Huo Qubing cried out, "I promised my uncle that I would take Wei Chang and the others away. Don't worry."

Liu Che coughed twice and touched the head of Huo Qubing, who was lying on his knees and crying as if his father had died. "Qubing, don't miss your uncle. Your uncle is just going to become an immortal."

Huo Qubing couldn't help crying.

Liu Che wiped his tears with relief.

"My dear child, I regret that this is the outcome!"

Huo Yan was also feeling uncomfortable. After checking Liu Che's pulse, he was still uneasy. He looked at the pill carefully and suddenly sneered.

He knew without using his brain that the pill must have been bought at a high price by his uncle who was rich and stupid.

After all, immortality is...

[After hunting geese all day, I got pecked in the eye by a goose. This is my fake elixir!]

[Fuck!]

[I finally sold it, but it was bought back.]

[We're selling one 100,000 taels, so we won't have to pay extra, will we?

[Well, the money is gone, all this time I worked for nothing. And I still want to give it to you for free.]

[Eat, eat, eat! All I do every day is tinker with immortality!]

[The money for the water truck was all gone.]

[What to do with newspapers!]

…

Huo Yan was so angry that he stepped forward, pulled up Liu Che's eyelids, and then inserted a needle into the painful area.

It hurts so much, you bastard.

Liu Che screamed in pain and sat up suddenly. He raised a trembling finger and pointed it at Huo Yan, accusing him, "You rebellious son! You won't even let me leave in peace!"

As he spoke, he seemed to remember that he was going to die soon. He suddenly felt sad and could not help wiping his eyes. He repeated loudly, "Rebellious son!"

Huo Yan's lungs were about to explode with anger at his words, and his chest was burning with anger. This scoundrel ruined my plan and even called me a rebellious son!

So he said in a sarcastic tone, "Uncle, you have a good eye. This elixir happens to be the Qingxin Jianghuo medicine I made."

He deliberately dragged out the tune when singing Qingxin Jianghuoyao, which made Liu Che so angry that he threw his clogs at him.

Huo Yan turned his head away, the corners of his lips curled up, his expression was playful, and he began to count them one by one for Liu Che while counting on his fingers.

"Lotus seeds, bamboo leaves, rush, raw rehmannia root, and akebia are all good things for clearing away heat and reducing internal heat. But I added aconite root. Just one piece can cause rheumatism. Uncle, are you having trouble breathing now? Are you about to suffocate?"

Liu Che covered his chest, gritted his teeth in anger, and threw the other clog at Huo Yan.

"Rebellious son, hand over the antidote to me!"

Huo Yan avoided his clogs again, put a pill in his palm in his mouth, chewed it, slowly exhaled, and suddenly made a face at Liu Che.

Liu Che was unhappy and angry, but he was inexplicably happy.

"I'm kidding, you idiot! I didn't add aconite. I just used it to clear away internal heat. Don't worry, I'll definitely reduce internal heat."

Liu Che was so angry that his headache disappeared for a moment. He looked around, rolled up his wide sleeves, took off his clogs, and only wore socks. He picked up the bronze Vermillion Bird Palace Lantern at hand and chased Huo Yan to beat him.

"Rebellious son! You rebellious son! Stop right there!"

The palace maids around him were afraid that the lamp oil would hurt him, so they called out "Your Majesty" and tried to get him to let go.

Liu Che didn't let them touch him and only asked them to follow and capture Huo Yan.

Huo Yan dodged the trap with ease and shouted triumphantly, "You still have to thank me, uncle. If I hadn't rubbed it, I might have put aconite and monkshood in it."

In response, Liu Che's rage was rising. "Today, I will definitely catch you, the rebellious son who sold fake medicine, and beat your ass to pieces!"

The palace servants did not dare to hurt him and could only release Hai.

Huo Yan relied on his small stature to dodge another wave of attacks.

He clicked his tongue and shrugged off Liu Che's threat. Then he met Huo Qubing head-on. Huo Qubing was standing in front of the door, blocking Huo Yan's way.

"Ayan, you just scared your uncle, that's not good."

He stood there, the sunlight falling on his shoulders, his eyes like torches, and spoke slowly.

Huo Yan's smile instantly faded, replaced by a look of tears, his brows drooping, his expression pitiful. "Brother, this isn't my fault. I was the one who made the pills for someone else to eat. He's now paying all the money I've earned to help farmers build waterwheels. I scared him and pissed him off, but he tried to hit me, and you're still blaming me. I knew you wouldn't side with me the moment I met him."

Huo Qubing thought he was really sad, so he moved aside and let him get out.

"It was my uncle who was deceived. It's not your fault."

Huo Yan, that double-faced man, was beaming with joy. After getting his approval, he slipped out like a loach and ran away, shouting as he ran.

"Little cabbages, the fields are turning yellow; I lost my father when I was little. Living with my uncle was not so bad; but I'm afraid my uncle will cheat me. When I think of my money, tears well up in my eyes. Peach blossoms bloom, apricot blossoms fall; when I think of my money, it all turns to wind."①

Liu Che was so angry that he became like a puffer fish, and Huo Qubing also sang along twice.

"Little cabbages, the ground is yellow!"

Liu Che didn't want him to sing. He snorted through his nose, put down the palace lantern, rubbed his waist and sat on the doorstep. He asked Huo Qubing to come over and whispered in his ear, "This pill of mine costs 200,000 gold. Qubing, please help me find out how much Ah Yan will sell it for after rubbing it."

Don't let him know that he bought fake medicine and paid too much for it, otherwise he will dig three feet underground to find the person who sold him the medicine and chop him up and feed him to the dogs.

His face was gloomy.

Forget about Ah Yan. Although the child is money-minded, he usually spends a lot on his uncle. And Ah Yan also said that what he sells is Qingxin Jianghuo Dan, which is the right medicine for the disease.

How could his eldest son sell him fake medicine? It was just those middlemen who were so despicable that they deliberately created the gimmick of immortality to deceive him.

"We must crack down on those who sell fake medicine, especially those who sell this elixir of immortality. We must arrest them all."

【Author’s words】

① "Little cabbages, the fields are turning yellow; I lost my father when I was little. My uncle cheated me, my brothers tried to stop me; when I think of money, tears well up in my eyes. Peach blossoms bloom, apricot blossoms fall; when I think of my money, it all turns to wind."

The more complete lyrics of "Little White Cabbage":

Little cabbages, the fields are yellow; when they were only two or three years old, they lost their mother.

It’s easy to follow daddy; I’m just afraid that daddy will marry a stepmother.

I married my stepmother three and a half years ago; I gave birth to a younger brother who is better than me.

My brother ate noodles and I drank the soup; I picked up the bowl with tears in my eyes.

Who knows that my dear mother misses me? I miss my dear mother only in my dreams.

Peach blossoms bloom, apricot blossoms fall; I think of my dear mother, and a gust of wind blows.

From now on, when someone talks about immortality, Pig Pig will say: That’s a lie! It’s all a lie!