Cheng Yaoyao's Diary (Part 1): August 12, 1979, Paris, sunny

I never thought I would have the chance to come to France. In 1979, when the plane arrived in Cannes, France, it was already 8pm. We didn’t have time to rest but took a bus and headed straight to the Cannes Film Festival.

Our mission on this trip was to bring glory to our country, but the number of people accompanying us was pitifully small: the director, me, the translator, and a local guide, Xie Zhao (the director helped him get a work permit).

The film festival was full of stars and glamour. I felt like I had returned to the past (this industry is stigmatized). There were the most famous movie stars of this century, but unfortunately I didn't know any of them. The jet lag made me dizzy and I could only smile and nod throughout the whole process.

"Tiao Tiao" won several awards, which was the first time a Chinese film received such an honor.

We Chinese were seated in the back corner, and when the winners were announced, all the arrogant, well-dressed Westerners turned around and looked at us.

The director and the translator were so excited that they cried. I was also a little excited. I shook hands tightly with Xie Zhao, and I was more proud of myself. I went on stage to accept the award and gave a speech in English. I didn't say the clichés in the script because no one in China could see it anyway.

There was a cocktail party after the film festival. Several English-speaking directors chatted with Director Rong, so I had to act as a translator and stare at Xie Zhao out of the corner of my eye. Xie Zhao was very handsome in a suit, and many people came up to chat with him, both men and women.

There was a blonde in a red dress who flirted with him, and he touched her waist! I remember that blonde was a little schadenfreude when her movie didn't win an award (this industry is stigmatized).

Xie Zhao refused to admit it afterwards, saying that the blonde girl accidentally fell and he helped her to show the friendly image of the Chinese people. On the contrary, I was smiling at those men at the cocktail party just now, and all the men were staring at me. An old hooligan who was old enough to be my grandfather even kissed the back of my hand!

Xie Zhao and I were both a little angry with each other. When we were staring at each other, a foreign reporter came over with a camera. He couldn't tell the appearance of Oriental people and thought Xie Zhao was the military officer in "Tiao Tiao".

Xie Zhao wanted to explain, so I took him to the beach outside and asked the reporter to take some photos of us. Those photos were very nice. Xie Zhao was well-dressed and looked strangely noble.

Exactly the same as my previous ideal type.

But I also like him when he is wearing a vest and military pants and planting vegetables in the yard. Alas, my aesthetics have been ruined by Xie Zhao.

We were traveling abroad at public expense and were supposed to board a flight back home that night. However, Director Rong had to stay in Paris for some business, so Xie Zhao and I unexpectedly got a day and a night off.

We followed the director to visit Notre Dame de Paris and the Louvre and bought some souvenirs. At my explicit suggestion, Xie Zhao finally left the director and took me away alone.

Paris in the afterglow of sunset reveals its charming side. Paris in 1979 is not much different from the future, elegance and dirtiness coexist, but there are fewer modern facilities, and everyone has a relaxed and elegant temperament.

There are many exquisite and elegant shops on the Champs-Elysees. The clothes in the windows made me linger. I even bought a Chanel handbag from the 1950s! If Xiao Fei was here, we would have a great resonance. Unfortunately, Xie Zhao, who had no idea what fashion was, was by my side. Fortunately, he paid quickly and quietly.

I was in high spirits until the blonde girl started chatting up Xie Zhao. I declared my claim to Xie Zhao to her in French and showed her my diamond ring. She spread her hands in regret and apologized.

Xie Zhao asked me what the girl said, and I said she mistook us for Japanese. Xie Zhao was also very angry and did not even say goodbye to her.

When we walked to the street, the girl was still looking at Xie Zhao through the glass window. I was so angry that I pulled Xie Zhao and kissed him.

After just one kiss, Xie Zhao pulled me up and ran away, saying he was afraid I would be arrested for hooliganism. I didn't know whether to laugh or cry, so I told him to look at the street. In the streets of Paris, you can see couples being affectionate everywhere, and when their love is at its peak, they don't care about anything.

Xie Zhao and I finally did something we had been thinking about for a long time: kissing on the street. A homeless man whistled at us, smiled at us kindly, and praised us in French for being a beautiful couple.

In the eyes of Westerners, good-looking Orientals can be called "beautiful", even a tough guy like Xie Zhao who is nearly 1.9 meters tall.

I didn't dare to translate this word to Xie Zhao, otherwise he might take back the banknotes given to the homeless man. The denomination Xie Zhao gave was quite large because the homeless man brought a dog.

We held hands all the way and kissed twice more. I had to remind Xie Zhao that kissing on the streets of Paris was allowed, but if you kissed too much you would be arrested.

I took Xie Zhao to a famous outdoor cafe for a meal. He had no taste at all and ate a butter baguette sandwich with beer. I gave him a taste of my macaron and he had only one word: choke.

I explained to him what macarons meant: a girl's vagina. He immediately packed a box and said he would go back to the hotel to compare them.

This person, even after attending university, still can't get rid of vulgar tastes...

"Sister, you are slandering me in your diary again." A deep and magnetic voice suddenly rang in my ears.

Cheng Yaoyao was startled and quickly covered his diary: "Xie Zhao, why did you peek at me writing in my diary?"

"I didn't peek. I saw it when I walked over." Xie Zhao wrapped himself in the hotel's bath towel, water drops rolling on his muscular chest muscles. He covered Cheng Yaoyao from behind, "I have a vulgar taste?"

"..." Cheng Yaoyao looked to the side with watery eyes and said guiltily: "Aren't you?"

"I am." Xie Zhao chuckled, his chest shaking slightly, and said in a charming voice: "Sister is right. Now, let me verify your words..."

In a strange country, in an old little hotel, outside the window facing the street is the dim light of street lamps and the occasional sound of car horns, giving people a sense of confusion and indulgence.

Cheng Yaoyao and Xie Zhao were like a pair of eloped lovers, enjoying themselves for a while in this strange little hotel.

Cheng Yaoyao's Diary (Part 2) August 13, 1979, Paris, sunny

I regret it. I really regret it now. My waist and legs are sore. I had to pretend nothing happened and sit in the cafe to meet people. They were two Chinese people recommended to me by Director Rong. The older one was called Shen Tong. He was said to be a local business tycoon and was very interested in the Chinese market. The younger one was Zhao Nian, who I had met in China. He was the translator who followed the British businessmen.

Director Rong found an excuse and left. I was very impatient with this kind of pimping situation, but I was not sure where this person came from, so I couldn't get angry. Xie Zhao squeezed my hand under the table and negotiated for me with an attitude that was neither humble nor arrogant.

Who knew Shen Tong would be so rude to Xie Zhao, his nose was not a nose, his eyes were not eyes. I was immediately furious and pulled Xie Zhao to leave. Zhao Nian quickly tried to smooth things over, and Shen Tong also apologized to Xie Zhao awkwardly.

The people at the table chatted awkwardly for a long time. Shen Tong looked like a superior, staring at me with intense eyes. It was not the usual way a man looked at me, but rather... kind? He asked me a lot of questions, including my age, experience, studies, family and relationships, and also about Xie Zhao.

I had a vague guess.

Sure enough, Shen Tong went around in circles for a long time and finally asked me: Do you have any impression of your mother?

I shook my head honestly. Not long after the original owner was born, her mother died, and my impression of her mother became even fainter.

Shen Tong showed me a photo of three young men and women. The youngest boy was Shen Tong. The girl was bright and generous, and her features vaguely resembled mine.

I clearly remember that the original owner's mother's family was a capitalist family. Her parents died one after another before the movement came, and her brothers died in the war, leaving her alone like a floating duckweed in the movement.

Shen Tong filled in another part of the story for me: he did not sacrifice himself, but by chance he smuggled himself to the UK and used his father's overseas assets to rebuild his fortune. Ten years later, his wife's nephew Zhao Nian happened to have the opportunity to return to China, so he asked him to find the whereabouts of Cheng Yaoyao and her daughter.

Who knew that her elder sister died early, and her only daughter married and had children early (Shen Tong glared at Xie Zhao angrily when he said this). Shen Tong fell ill under the shock of the bad news, unable to endure the fatigue of the journey.

This time, because Cheng Yaoyao went abroad to attend a film festival, Shen Tong finally found an opportunity to fly from England to Paris just to meet Cheng Yaoyao.

Shen Tong, oh no, my uncle's words made me burst into tears. I couldn't cry, and I felt really embarrassed, so I had to lower my head and lean on Xie Zhao's shoulder. Xie Zhao gently stroked my hair, feeling very distressed.

My uncle was very angry about this and criticized Xie Zhao again. Especially after learning that Xie Zhao and I had just married, my uncle was so upset that he also scolded Zhao Nian for spreading the wrong news.

Zhao Nian felt very aggrieved. The last time Zhao Nian met me, Xie Zhao and I were holding our roommate's child, so it was no wonder that he misunderstood. But I wasn't going to explain it to him.

Seeing that my uncle had such a bad temper, I took the opportunity to complain to him about my stepmother and my biological father.

Unexpectedly, after listening to this, my uncle did not scold my dad. Instead, he sighed and said: Don't blame him.

This is a very common and touching love story in this era. Cheng Zheng and the original owner's mother Shen Tang fell in love when they were in college. At that time, Shen Tang's parents had passed away and her two younger brothers were still young. After my Shen family was identified as capitalists, Shen Tang had a hard time in school. Cheng Zheng never wavered. He, a nerd, fought with others for Shen Tang and often used his living expenses to support the Shen siblings. Shen Tang's two younger brothers were young and impulsive at that time, always fooling around outside. Cheng Zheng helped Shen Tang clean up the mess without telling her. Later, in the darkest period, he did not hesitate to get married with Shen Tang at the risk of losing his job and being labeled a rightist.

My uncle said: "Yuanyao, you have to believe in your father's love for your mother. It's a pity that he didn't live long enough...otherwise, they would have been the happiest couple in the world."

My uncle talked for a long time, wiped his face and scolded: How could Cheng Zheng, a nerd, come up with the idea of ​​marrying a stepmother to take care of his daughter.

I was speechless too. But after listening to my uncle's words, my complaints about my father gradually faded away.

My uncle has been married to his wife for many years and has no children. He really wanted me to stay abroad to accompany him for a while, but unfortunately due to visa issues and my own wishes, I did not stay. My uncle seemed a little disappointed, but he still respected our decision.

My uncle finally gave me two documents, one in Chinese and one in English. I opened them after returning to China and found that I had gained an uncle and had become a rich second-generation.

Apart from my uncle's overseas share, the value of my grandmother's house, shops and minerals alone was an astonishing number. However, all the houses and land were confiscated, and only a small villa and sealed antique calligraphy and paintings were returned.

Although it is still inconvenient to communicate with overseas, my uncle still contacts me by phone and email. He wrote that he has recovered a lot after taking the supplements I asked someone to bring him. A delegation will leave from the UK next month and he will go back home with them.

It has been more than a month since the letters were forwarded to me. Tomorrow is New Year's Eve, I wonder when my uncle will...

"Sister." There was a knock on the bedroom door. It was pushed open and Xie Zhao came in wearing a brand new camel-colored cashmere sweater and coat: "Come out, the guests are here."

"Yeah!" Cheng Yaoyao closed his notebook, stood up and ran towards Xie Zhao.

Xie Zhao held her slightly cold hand, rubbed it, put it in his pocket, and the two went downstairs side by side.

In the small villa, the flame in the fireplace was bright and warm. Xie Fei, Grandma, Zhang Xiaofeng, Han Yin, Huang Liu and a group of people were sitting on the sofa, chatting and laughing. There were hot tea and snacks on the coffee table.

There were several kittens lying or crawling on the carpet, the disobedient black and white kitten and the fat orange and white cat were chasing each other, and the majestic big dog was the first to run out of the house with his tongue sticking out.

The laughter and lights coming from the house warmed people's hearts. Lu Qingtang was dressed elegantly, holding an exquisite gift box and smiling as he rang the doorbell.

Farther away, a car stopped silently at the intersection, and snow began to fall from the dark blue sky.

I hear a dog barking behind the wooden door, and a man returns home in the windy and snowy night.