leaves

"I miss you." Bai Shunan leaned on Lu Jinfeng and said in a tired tone.

Bai Shunan gained some attention due to the release of Light and Shadow. Zhang Wei struck while the iron was hot and tried to fill his schedule. Bai Shunan was so busy that he was almost unable to move his body day and night, and was not often with Lu Jinfeng. They would always find ways to make more time to see each other, but they would often say goodbye in a hurry after meeting once.

Bai Shunan's calm voice was indifferent and clear, just like it was back then, and it aroused Lu Jinfeng's tender feelings.

He reached out his hand, stroked the back of Lu Jinfeng's neck, raised his head and kissed him, trying to comfort Lu Jinfeng who was sulking because he couldn't see him yesterday.

When the two kissed each other, they both felt a certain degree of nervousness, which added a bit of immaturity to the kiss. Under this nervousness, they cautiously explored, gradually and slowly going deeper. Unconsciously, their lips and tongues were entangled... After kissing for a while, Bai Shunan fell asleep. Lu Jinfeng hurriedly supported Bai Shunan. He took two steps back and sat down against the wall. Gently and tenderly, he placed the sleeping Bai Shunan in his arms. Lu Jinfeng lowered his head, put his hand close to Bai Shunan's cheek, rubbed it softly, and said softly, "I miss you too."

Lu Jinfeng's expression was filled with longing, and in his downcast gaze, a subtle sadness lingered, a hint of pity. Lu Jinfeng didn't know when he'd realized he might have a bit of severe separation anxiety towards Bai Shunan. Even after being out for a long time in the morning, he'd always suddenly turn back just to catch a glimpse of Bai Shunan, still catching up on his sleep. Seeing him there, his uncontrollable panic would subside a little, only to be stricken again at the moment he left Bai Shunan. For a moment, he felt like he couldn't live without Shunan. At the same time, he reflected, feeling that he'd trapped Shunan and couldn't do this, but that conflicted with his heart. This troubled Lu Jinfeng deeply. If he happened to return home and didn't see Shunan, he'd stand there, feeling alone and miserable, and then wait for Bai Shunan to clumsily comfort him.

He wanted him to be by his side all the time, but he knew that this couldn't happen.

Whenever Lu Jinfeng had free time, he would visit the set. Seeing Bai Shunan acting seriously, he felt very happy and proud. Especially when he heard others praising Bai Shunan, he would feel even happier.

At the same time, he became increasingly disgusted with those who had intimate scenes with Bai Shunan, especially Li Suiwen, who was about to have her fourth relationship with Bai Shunan. He could not stand his wild imagination. When he thought about their fourth relationship, he felt very unwilling and unconvinced. He began to sulk again, and frantically comforted himself that he and Shunan were the best match and he was the most suitable to stand by Shunan's side.

Lu Jinfeng really wanted to get Shunan's verbal affirmation on this point, but he swallowed back many words because of the secret awkwardness in his heart. This pain that he had nowhere to vent bothered many people. Among them, Zhan Song was the worst victim, followed by Li Xuanyue. After Li Xuanyue was tortured to death and said tiredly countless times, "Yes, yes, you and Bai Shunan are the best match, it's simply destined, a match made in heaven", she blocked Lu Jinfeng without any regrets. Later, she pulled Lu Jinfeng off the blacklist because she had to make a decision for the new movie project.

As Lu Jinfeng's colleague, Zhan Song couldn't act like Li Xuanyue. He listened to Lu Jinfeng's ramblings, silently thinking to himself that the world was about to end... until Lu Jinfeng suddenly interrupted with a sentence, "I'm planning to retire from the entertainment industry soon."

"What?"

"Yeah, Shunan said he missed me yesterday."

"..." Zhan Song laughed in anger, "I'm asking about your retirement from acting!"

"Yeah, yes, I'm planning to retire from acting in the near future," Lu Jinfeng said in a much calmer tone when talking about this topic. He lowered his head and read the news while saying, "Don't accept any new work for me during this period."

"Haven't you won the award yet?"

"No, I feel like I'm getting trapped by this goal."

"No feeling." Zhan Song was silent for a while. "So what do you want to do after you retire from acting?"

"have no idea."

"Where is your original intention of becoming an actor?" Although Zhan Song usually annoyed Lu Jinfeng the most and always said that he hoped Lu Jinfeng would retire early, it was undeniable that as long as Lu Jinfeng stayed in the entertainment industry, he would be a cash cow.

"Original intention?" Lu Jinfeng was momentarily bewildered. "At that time, everything happened suddenly. I hadn't decided what I wanted to do. I was lost and running away. When I came to my senses, I had already embarked on the path of an actor. It's been so many years since I started filming."

"You should think about it carefully now..." Zhan Song suddenly heard Lu Jinfeng's laughter. He glanced at Lu Jinfeng and saw large patches of green on Lu Jinfeng's phone. "You sent so many messages to Bai Shunan, and he only replied with a few words. Don't you think he's annoying?"

"You don't understand. Shunan likes me like this."

Zhan Song: “…”

He had never been very optimistic about Lu Jinfeng's relationships, let alone the fact that they met through acting. Although Lu Jinfeng's behavior was very unusual this time, he still believed that this was just another short-term relationship that Lu Jinfeng had impulsively chosen. At this moment, Zhan Song had not yet realized how much he would be tortured by this relationship with Lu Jinfeng. The unprecedented mental harm it brought made him want to beg Lu Jinfeng to retire as soon as possible. In the miserable days ahead, he would sigh countless times, how could the insecure Lu Jinfeng be so annoying, how could Lu Jinfeng be so unbearable.

"Are you retiring for him?" Zhan Song put forward his own guess. After all, he didn't retire earlier or later, but just at this time, he started to talk about Bai Shunan often and proposed to retire.

Lu Jinfeng's tone turned cold, but he continued typing. "Do you think I'm the kind of person who would do anything for love?"

Zhan Song was silent. From what he knew so far, Lu Jinfeng was indeed not that kind of person. In fact, in the past, he had often given him the impression that even when it came to relationships, he seemed to be insulated from love.

Lu Jinfeng looked at the message "The other party is typing..." at the top of the screen and softened his tone. "This is a choice I made myself. I thought about it for a long time before I reunited with Shunan."

"Reunion, did you know each other before?"

"Well, at that time, when I was fifteen, I watched him for a long time until he started looking at me."

Zhan Song was speechless for a moment. He remembered that Lu Jinfeng had never been in a relationship at that time. "So you won't be filming in the future?"

"I will probably continue filming in the future. I don't dislike it and I actually enjoy it. I just want to take a break recently, but I'm not sure how long it will be. I just have a vague feeling that it will be a very long time, and I don't want my fans to wait in vain. After much thought, I think retiring is the most appropriate."

"I understand, but I still advise you to think it over carefully." Seeing that Lu Jinfeng did not respond and was only waiting for news from Bai Shunan, Zhan Song, who suspected that Lu Jinfeng had a crush on Bai Shunan for many years, said helplessly, "How much do you like him now?"

After a while, he heard Lu Jinfeng say, "I'm afraid Shunan will know how much I like him."

The pale shadows of the trees outside the window passed through the car. Lu Jinfeng looked over and saw a falling leaf. He opened the window slightly, and a mournful sound of wind wafted in, blowing away the deepest impression of autumn, a scene that would never return. The fleeting greenery came and went, and in the blank moment before waking, Lu Jinfeng vaguely heard Bai Shunan's voice - "You're awake."

When I opened my eyes again, there was nothing on the white ceiling.