Chapter 44

A female voice on the radio announced flight information in a calm and restrained tone. The air was filled with the scent of disinfectant, perfume, and countless unknown journeys.

Lin Wan buried herself deeper into the chair, and the name that had once rolled between her lips and teeth appeared in the mouths of many people.

This time, it’s true, we will never see each other again.

Long-distance flights do consume people's energy to a certain extent. It is not a sudden loss, but a wear and tear like water dripping through a stone.

Lin Wan completed the tasks she needed to complete in the UK in the somewhat turbid air of the economy class, and fell into a drowsy sleep again.

The dream was so bizarre that the moment Lin Wan opened her eyes, she even forgot that she was on a plane. She also felt that Lin Zhen was still alive, but she hadn't seen him for a long time.

She thought for a long time with her head tilted up in the dim and cramped seat, then stood up and went to the cabin bathroom to wash her face.

The pale light shone on Lin Wan's face. The person in the mirror had very pale skin, and her eyes were dark and without a trace of light. Water droplets dotted her skin, making it shimmer.

She was shocked to find that she had become so haggard.

She stared at herself in the mirror for three seconds, took a few deep breaths, and walked out of the bathroom.

When landing, Lin Wan unexpectedly saw Chen Yu again.

Of course, it was just a one-sided encounter.

Unlike the crowded airports in the UK, this time he was alone and didn't even bring an assistant.

Lin Wan pressed her hat down. She was about to rush to the funeral home.

As the black car sped across the overpass, the surrounding buildings appeared cold and smooth, creating a sense of detachment and distance as it dived.

Even the buildings have changed. The street where I once took Chen Yu to have Chinese food has been demolished.

People are different, and things are different too.

The car windows were closed tightly, blocking out the sound of the wind and the clamor of the dust. Through the windows, all the scenery outside looked like a silent, flowing, cold-toned movie.

The white sun was hanging high above the skyscrapers, and the light shone directly on her face, casting a clear shadow.

Lin Wan had thought that he might return to Jiangcheng, but not in the way he did now.

She opened the map on her phone and carefully identified the current "road".

Until this moment, Lin Wan still held on to some strange and firm hope.

Lin Wan felt that Lin Zhen was still alive.

"Xiao Wan, you're here." The middle-aged man's voice was familiar and warm, but it made the incongruity even worse.

Lin Wan nodded and smiled, the same smile she had gotten used to a few years ago.

The mourning hall, which had been quite noisy, suddenly became quiet. Everyone stared at Lin Wan with shocked and confused expressions as he walked towards the lying body.

Maybe it shouldn't be called a body, but a corpse.

Perhaps because he died of drowning, Lin Zhen's facial features appeared extremely swollen, and his body also swelled up a lot.

The makeup artist tried his best to restore his appearance when he was alive, even using some bright colors, with bright blush on his pale face.

Lin Wan felt her heart tighten and tighten, beating wildly at an incredible speed. She took two quick steps and walked in front of the body.

That feeling was very strange. She even had a certain feeling in her heart. She felt that the person lying there was someone she didn't know.

The man did not look like Lin Zhen, and many details did not match the man in her memory.

Lin Wan's hands clasped tightly into the backpack beside her. Even though she had seen it with her own eyes, she still didn't want to imagine it.

She naively and almost stubbornly believed that this was a farce, that Lin Zhen was not dead, and that as long as she walked out of the mourning hall, her father, whom she had not seen for many years, would come back to take her home.

The staff pushed open the door, looking normal.

Lin Zhen was pushed in.

The scene that Lin Wan had imagined countless times on the plane finally happened before her eyes, like a dream.

Maybe someone around him advised him not to be too sad, maybe someone less than three meters away from him was carefully asking about his identity, but Lin Wan felt that these seemed to no longer matter.

These things that were more important than anything else in her eyes when she was young are no longer that important at this moment.

She thought she would burst into tears, hold onto Lin Zhen's hand tightly and not let go, and beg the staff to let her take one more look at her father, because she had only been there ten minutes.

But Lin Wan didn't do anything. She didn't dare to touch Lin Zhen's body, and even getting close to him seemed to be a difficult thing.

She just stood there blankly, watching everything happen like a bystander.

Everyone around was crying breathlessly, except Lin Wan. She was too calm and didn't seem to be aware of any sadness.

Lin Wan felt a little cold-hearted. Lin Zhen had died, and she hadn't shed a single tear. Perhaps she was just an ungrateful person, cold-hearted and heartless, destined to die alone.

Everything that happened afterwards seemed to be accelerated, including collecting the ashes and scattering them in the Jiashui River.

During this time, Lin Fulai kept talking to Lin Wan, and Lin Wan responded according to the procedures set in the past.

"Don't be too sad. A Zhen doesn't want you to be too sad either." Lin Fulai looked at Lin Wan's pale face and felt a little sorry for her. He reached out and patted her shoulder with comforting meaning.

"Thank you for your concern, uncle. I will try my best."

Lin Wan's answer was very comfortable, just like she had been in the past.

Lin Fulai's words were stuck in his throat by these words. He knew that Lin Wan was a child with his own ideas, who could arrange everything by himself. He could go to the UK alone and quietly to continue his postgraduate studies at such a good school.

He didn't receive much education and had been working in society for several years. The most profound thing he learned was to greet people with a smile.

Lin Fulai had always hoped to be closer to Lin Wan, and he used to give her gifts that children liked, thinking she would like them, but the results were always unsatisfactory.

So Lin Fulai paused, and did not continue with his previous words of comfort. He just added softly: "Xiao Wan, if you have any problems, go find your uncle. Your uncle doesn't have any great abilities, but there are always some things he can help you with."

The river surface is very clear, but now it is autumn, so the wind is always a little cold.

Lin Xingguo and Tang Wanlin did not come to see Lin Zhen for the last time. Perhaps they felt that Lin Zhen's death was extremely disgraceful.

Lin Wan always felt that Lin Zhen was a very mature person who was able to fully control his own life and arrange everything in an orderly manner.

In Lin Wan's heart, he was an absolute strong man. She didn't understand why Lin Zhen would actually commit suicide in a gesture of - dying for love.

When I opened the door, the house was empty and Aunt Chen was not there.

As soon as Lin Wan walked in, she didn't even know where to go. Although Lin Zhen often didn't go home before, she had never felt this way before.

Lin Zhen will never come back.

Lin Wan went into her room. The furnishings in the room were exactly the same as when she left. Even the large book she had casually stuffed into the drawer was in its original place, untouched.

It was actually very simple to find out Lin Wan’s current cell phone number. She just had to ask Xu Su. She had never asked Xu Su to hide her current cell phone number.

——These were some of her inexplicable fantasies at the time.

But for so many years, Lin Wan was delighted every time she saw a call from China, but none of them was from Lin Zhen.

He seemed to have completely disappeared from his own life.

But now, Lin Wan's room looks like Jiang Yuexing's studio.

Lin Zhen never seems to express his emotions. He only repeatedly strokes the texture that once existed after something is completely broken.

This is the case with Jiang Yuexing and Lin Wan as well.

Lin Wan washed up hastily and lay down on the bed directly.

The blankets had always made her feel comfortable and warm, but now they felt terribly cold. It seemed that no matter how much heat she radiated from her body, she couldn't warm the blankets.

Lin Wan lay in bed from seven o'clock to two o'clock in the morning. His whole body was aching, but he couldn't fall asleep.

Finally at three o'clock, she couldn't bear it anymore and got up.

She had actually finished her work, and she didn't know whether she should buy a plane ticket back now. Her job as a Chinese teacher there didn't allow her to take too long of a leave.

Lin Wan was terrified of being in a confined space for more than ten hours. She almost felt suffocated on the way here.

Lin Wan opened his phone, wanting to find someone to talk to, but after looking through his contacts, he found only classmates and colleagues.

There was no one with whom she could share her feelings at this moment, even though it was daytime.

Lin Wan suddenly thought of Jiang Nuo. They had not been in contact for a long time since she went to England.

The previous mobile phone card was still in the bag where she kept her passport and other identification documents. She had just stuffed it in after changing the phone card.

It has been unused for so long, I don’t know if it has been cancelled.

Lin Wan, with her hair in disarray, thought for a long time in bed, then got out of bed barefoot and reached into her bag for her phone card.

Jiang Nuo should be in Beijing now. I wonder if she is asleep at this time. Will calling her at this time disturb her?

Lin Wan hesitated and put the SIM card out of the slot. She swiped through the address book again and again, and she saw Chen Yu's name.

She suddenly wanted to call Chen Yu. This feeling rose from the bottom of her heart and occupied her mind in an instant.

Lin Wan could hardly control herself from dialing the number, her hand already on the dial button.

The shadows of the trees outside the window swayed. Lin Wan did not close the window, and some moonlight poured in from the window, falling on the somewhat worn wooden floor, like frost and snow on the ground.

Lin Wan didn't press it in the end. She thought of the girl next to Chen Yu on the streets of London and realized the consequences of her upcoming inappropriate behavior.

She loosened her tense fingers, exited the phone app, and logged into her previous WeChat account.

She suddenly wanted to see the chat history between her and Lin Zhen.

As soon as I logged into WeChat, I was flooded with information, including pictures that Chen Yu had sent me a few years ago, and messages that Lin Zhen had sent me a few days ago.

Just, three days ago.

At that moment, Lin Wan could hardly control the trembling of his fingertips.

[Dog Emperor: Wanwan, I'm going to see your mother.]

The tears caused by jet lag finally fell.

In the deserted villa late at night, Lin Wan burst into tears.

Why...why did she treat her father like this?

Perhaps, if I took one more step forward and talked to him more, it would be too late.

Lin Wan covered her face and burst into tears.

She gasped for breath and couldn't catch her breath for a long time.

Just then, an unexpected text message made the phone vibrate.

Lin Wan originally didn't want to pay attention to it, but with a certain mentality, he raised his hand and glanced at the message.

——It’s a text message from Chen Yu.

He told Lin Wan that he was downstairs.