Chapter 17

Zhao Jinglu listened in a daze. Ling Peng's words were clear and coherent, like sunlight dispelling fog, allowing her to see another possibility. But the deepest, cold thorn in her heart still remained. She raised her head, her eyes slightly red, and her voice was so soft that it was almost inaudible, but it was filled with a stubborn confusion:

"Then... why is it... every time when it seems like I need to make a choice between several people... it seems like I'm always the one who gets abandoned and left behind?"

She paused, tears finally falling, her voice filled with even deeper helplessness: "Once, twice...it might be someone else's problem. But it's like this every time...Senior, is this really my problem?"

This question carried with it all the unspoken grievances and self-doubt she'd experienced from middle school to high school. Su Xiaowen and the others' choices, the brief estrangement between Fan Chen and Wang Lei after the Gaoxin incident... these images flashed through her mind. She wasn't questioning Ling Peng, but rather the heartbreaking ending that seemed to repeat itself over and over again, and she wondered if she was inherently unworthy of being firmly chosen.

Ling Peng clearly hadn't expected such a direct, weighty, and self-aggressive question. The lightheartedness and playfulness on his face vanished completely, replaced by a serious expression. He remained silent for several seconds, as if carefully considering how to resolve this logical impasse.

"Look at me, Zhao Jinglu." His voice was not loud, but it had a calming power.

Zhao Jinglu subconsciously met his gaze. His eyes were focused, without any perfunctory expression.

"Your question itself is a misunderstanding." He spoke slowly, his tone very firm. "'Always like this' doesn't mean it's your 'problem'. It more likely means that you always fall into the same 'situation' or always attract the same 'type' of people."

"It's like..." He quickly thought of a metaphor she could understand, "...a person with a light palate, if he always goes to a Sichuan restaurant, he'll definitely 'always' be fed spicy food. Is it the Sichuan restaurant's problem, or the person's problem? Neither. It's just a mismatch. Maybe he needs to find a Cantonese restaurant instead of wondering if there's something 'wrong' with his taste buds."

"First, you have to understand that the choices others make reflect their own mindsets and circumstances, not your values," he said slowly, each word clearly. "Some choose to fit in, some choose to protect themselves, some choose the easier path... These choices often have nothing to do with whether you are good or not, or whether you are worth it."

He paused, as if recalling something, and then said with certainty, "At least in my opinion, someone who feels sad for a friend, who reflects on himself, and who wants to do his best to help is definitely not an option that should be easily given up."

"Secondly," he continued, his tone more resolute, "the 'abandonment' you mentioned might just be an illusion. It's like playing chess, where sometimes a temporary retreat allows for a better strategy. Or like when we play basketball, some players excel at driving, others at long-range shooting. It's just a matter of position, not that the team has abandoned either of them. Perhaps you just happened to be in different 'positions' at that moment."

"But," he changed the subject, looking at her sharply, "if someone repeatedly and easily excludes you from his priorities for various reasons, then it's not worth your trouble. It's not your loss, it's his."

Finally, he concluded, his tone slowing down, even adding a hint of encouragement: "So, stop judging yourself by other people's choices. You're great. The question isn't whether you're worthy of being chosen, but rather that you haven't met the person or circle who will choose you without hesitation and unwaveringly. All you have to do is believe you're worthy, and then keep moving forward. You'll eventually meet them."

These words, like a hammer, shattered the ice that had long frozen in Zhao Jinglu's heart. He didn't just say, "It's not your fault," but instead completely deconstructed her fears from a logical and psychological perspective. He told her that her value wasn't determined by the choices of others, and assured her that she deserved to be firmly chosen.

Tears poured down my face, rolling down in large drops. But this time, it wasn't out of grievance or self-doubt, but a sense of relief from being deeply understood and supported.

That afternoon, they spent some time in the bookstore. Ling Peng found the information he needed and was very satisfied. Zhao Jinglu bought the book "How to Win Friends and Influence People."

On the way back to school, the atmosphere was much more relaxed. Ling Peng returned to his lazy, occasionally teasing her: "Have you figured it out? If not, I'll charge you next time. I'm very expensive."

Zhao Jinglu couldn't help but laugh. Although the problem still existed, it felt like the huge stone weighing on her heart had been lifted off her chest. "Oh, so that's how you save money."

Seeing that she knew she was talking back, Ling Peng also smiled happily.

Across town, Xu Linjie stared at his silent phone screen, restless for the entire afternoon. After his anger, he felt a surge of regret and anxiety. He regretted his uncontrolled emotions and hurtful words, fearing he'd actually pushed Zhao Jinglu away.

The once tightly connected thread between him and Zhao Jinglu is quietly changing because of this quarrel and the appearance of Ling Peng. Zhao Jinglu begins to look at the relationships around her from a new perspective, and this time, she is no longer just the little girl who passively endures everything.